If he thought to divert her, it was the wrong tack to take. Her eyes narrowed. ‘It’s not a holiday, it’s a honeymoon. I’m your wife,’ she insisted, feeling a curling sensation in her stomach at the possessive sound of the words. ‘If I can do nothing else, at least I can listen and try to ease the burden.’
Pierce stared down into his coffee, lips twisting. ‘You pick a fine time to start asserting your position,’ he retorted mockingly, and a shiver ran down her spine, for this was a return to the Pierce who had been conspicuously missing of late.
A conclusion which made her suddenly stop and think before jumping in with both feet. Something just didn’t ring true, and her lips thinned as she realised what it was. ‘You can’t make me argue with you, Pierce. I want to know,’ she declared firmly, and caught a flash of something like amusement in his eyes.
‘Well, well, well, I knew there would come a time when you began to see through me, but I didn’t reckon on tonight,’ he revealed with a laugh of self-derision. ‘All right, if you insist. There’s been a slight hitch at one of our construction sites. It’s one of my pet projects, so naturally I find it hard not being on hand to help.’
‘What kind of hitch?’
Pierce scratched his forehead. ‘There’s some question as to who owns the land we’re building on.’
Alix felt some of the tension leave her. ‘That’s it?’ she asked dubiously. ‘From your behaviour, I thought it was something more serious.’
He sent her a bland smile. ‘Would I lie to you?’
That was a leading question if ever she’d heard one. ‘Yes, if you had to. If you thought it necessary,’ she declared, and knew at once that it was no more than the truth. Had probably always been the truth...and that should have told her something.
Pierce appeared to go quite still, but his eyes were watchful. ‘Now there’s an interesting statement. Do you think you’re finally coming to understand me, Alix?’
She pulled a wry face, because for the first time in her life she was beginning to think she was. ‘Wouldn’t you say it was about time?’ she mocked herself, even now needing some defence.
In answer Pierce dragged a hand through his hair, leaving it ruffled, so that Alix experienced a longing to go across and smooth it down. ‘Many things are long overdue between us. What conclusions have you drawn?’
Alix glanced down at her hands. All she had to go on were feelings really. Pure feminine instinct. ‘You’re a very complicated man,’ she declared, glancing at him through her lashes and seeing the way his lips twisted.
‘As complicated as a Chinese puzzle,’ he agreed, and Alix gave a tiny start of surprise.
‘I had a Chinese puzzle once; it was very intricate. Then one day, by accident almost, I suddenly discovered the key to it, and of course I found it wasn’t nearly so difficult at all. I could open it with my eyes shut,’ she revealed, feeling strangely trembly inside, without knowing just why.
Pierce looked soberly back at her. ‘It’s a universal fact that the answer is always easy when you know it. The only hard questions are the ones you don’t know the answers to.’
‘Meaning there’s a logical answer to everything?’
He spread his hands. ‘Even me.’
Alix licked dry lips. This was a cat-and-mouse game with a difference. More was at stake here than just winning a battle of words. ‘Which leaves me with two questions. Do I want to know the answer? And if so, how do I go about finding it?’
Pierce’s face lost all signs of amusement as he observed her through narrowed eyes. ‘Well, now, I can’t help you with the first, but as to the second, how many clues do you need, Alix?’ he demanded, with a decided edge to his voice which raised the lid on her own never far from boiling temper.
‘How do I know, when you only give me half the facts?’ she countered, feeling the moment was getting away from her just when she seemed to be making progress.
With an abrupt movement, Pierce rose to his feet. ‘You don’t want facts, Alix, you want assurances,’ he returned curtly, and she shot up too.
‘Is that a crime? Just what do you want of me, Pierce?’ It was, if he only knew it, a cry from the heart.
‘What do you want of me, Alix?’ he countered softly, then, seeing her obvious confusion, sighed heavily. ‘If you ever do decide, you know where to find me. I have to make another phone call. Excuse me.’
Alix watched him go with a sinking heart. They had been so close! She knew it in her bones. Yet...close to what? Her shoulders sagged. The answer to an unknown question. Why was he making everything so complicated? And yet hadn’t she just said that the Chinese puzzle had been complicated until she knew the key? Which meant there was a simple answer to why he had gone to so much trouble to help her. But he could have done that just as easily without marrying her! Which could only mean he had wanted to marry her.
Her head began to thump and she clasped her hands to her temples. It didn’t make sense. Didn’t match up to what she had always known of him. Yet, only today, she had begun to discover that she hadn’t really known him at all. Which meant...what? That nothing had been the way it seemed? Then or now? Yet there was no disguising the fact that he had hurt her so callously. It was hardly the action of a caring man. Until she recalled that he had helped her father when he hadn’t had to.
Thoughts of her father brought her up short. She had meant to phone her mother when they arrived yesterday. She really ought to ring home. A glance at her watch told her it wasn’t yet too late if she acted now. With that in mind she went in search of Pierce. As she had seen no sign of a telephone, then it must be in his study, wherever that was.
As it happened, she met him coming out of the room. ‘Were you looking for me?’ There was a sharp edge to the irony in his voice.
‘Only indirectly. I wanted to use the phone to ring Mother. I meant to do it yesterday,’ she explained, for some reason feeling extremely diffident. Perhaps it was the stern lines of his face which made her feel at fault somehow.
At her answer, however, the sternness vanished and mockery was back in his eyes. ‘What else?’ he drawled tiredly. With a studied show of gallantry he reopened the door and switched on the light. ‘Help yourself. The code is on the pad beside the phone.’
‘Thank you,’ she murmured politely as she passed by him, and he laughed shortly.
‘Why thank me? It’s your phone too. Everything here is yours now, sweet Alix. Give your mother my love, won’t you?’ he added, and closed the door after him.
Once again she was left staring after him. Everything here was hers? Did he include himself in that, and, if so, just what did he mean? She was beginning to feel hunted, as if he was laughing at her because, with all the clues he was giving her, she was still too blind to see the answer!
Irritated, she gave up and went to place her call. As she expected, her mother was still up, and they talked for almost an hour before Emily Petrakos exclaimed over the bill they were running up, and Alix felt compelled to say goodnight. She felt better for the call, even though it had solved nothing. But it was good to hear that her father was improving by the hour, now that he need worry no longer.
Sighing, she remained at the desk and took a curious glance about the room. It seemed to reflect Pierce’s personality aptly—functional yet comfortable. The walls were lined with bookcases, some filled with books and others loaded with mementoes. There were the usual family photographs on one shelf, and she automatically rose and went over to it. There was a portrait of a man she recognised as Pierce’s grandfather, but not the one he had once shown her at the New York apartment. The others must have been of various other members of his family. There was a wedding photo tucked in at the back too, and it came as a severe shock to realise it was of the two of them—yet nothing like the shock she felt next when it dawned on her that it was of their first wedding!
She stood there stunned. Pierce had kept a picture of them? Why, when by his own admission he had only married her to get the shi
pping line back? Why would a man bent on revenge do that, unless...? She shook her head in disbelief. No, it couldn’t be. That would be too incredible! But even as she turned away her eye caught the title of one book, an anthology of poetry. She remembered he had referred to Lovelace only that afternoon, and she didn’t hesitate to take the book and search the index.
Yet she hadn’t needed to, because as she searched for the page the book fell open of its own accord. And there was a poem, its last lines underlined in red.
‘I could not love thee (Dear) so much, Lov’d I not honour more.
Love? Honour? She held on to the bookcase as her legs felt weak. Had he, all this time, been trying to tell her that he loved her? That he had always loved her? She doubted her own reasoning, and yet, amazingly, everything suddenly seemed to fit into place. His reasons for helping her family, and for insisting on marriage. All done because he loved her?
How she longed to believe it, but she had been hurt very badly once for believing he loved her. She didn’t think she could go through that again and survive. Yet what other explanation fitted the circumstances? But if he loved her, why hadn’t he told her? Because he had his pride, too. Even the bravest man must fear rejection, and she had given him no reason to suppose that she would welcome a declaration of love from him. On the contrary, she had been quick to hurt lest she be hurt, so he had told her she wasn’t ready to hear him. All he had done was give her a rose and jokingly say he might have given it to lay his heart symbolically at her feet, for her to trample over in her turn!
Oh, Pierce!
Of course, she could be wrong, but she had to know. One way or the other, finally she had to know, because her whole future depended on it. Hastily she put the book back, turning off the light as she left, heading for the terrace. Only Pierce wasn’t there, nor was he in the lounge. That only left their bedroom.
She found him there, the low glow of one lamp revealing his long figure standing out on the balcony, a towel hitched low about his hips, and his hair shining wetly, evidence that he had just come from the shower. For an instant she hesitated, then kicked off her shoes and padded across the carpet to him. She halted a breath away, yet not by a flicker did he show he had heard her.
There was something forbidding in the set of his back, but she refused to be put off. She licked her lips. ‘Pierce?’ Her voice was a low croak which she barely heard herself. Yet he stiffened, his whole attitude now one of waiting. She spoke again, and this time she reached out to touch his shoulder. ‘Pierce?’
His reaction was electric. With a groan he spun round, reaching for her and pulling her into his arms. ‘Thank God. You’re a hard woman, Alix. I thought you’d never come!’ he growled emotively, and lowered his head.
Heart in her throat, her hands came up to his shoulders, her intention to hold him off as she denied him. ‘No. Don’t Pierce, I—’ The rest of the words died under his mouth.
He kissed her with a searing passion that allowed no room for protest. She did try to struggle, but it was a half-hearted attempt at best, because her hands betrayed her, clutching on to the hot silken skin beneath them and urging him closer. Pierce’s triumphant grunt of satisfaction made her stomach clench in response, and she discovered that the strange whimpering sounds she could hear were her own as she kissed him back with equal passion.
When at last he tore his mouth from hers, she dragged air into her desperately panting lungs. A remnant of sanity remained. ‘Pierce...wait!’
His head came up, eyes burning hotly into hers. ‘It’s too late for waiting, Alix. We both want this, don’t we?’ he demanded gruffly, and her throat closed over.
He was right. What good were words when they could communicate like this? The reason for her being there vanished under a more urgent need. ‘Yes,’ she groaned, ‘we both want it.’
Immediately she lost her breath again as his lips trailed moistly down her tense throat to claim the rapid pulse at it base. ‘I need you, Alix. God, how I need you tonight!’ he breathed against her, and at that desperately wanted admission she was lost.
She was scarcely aware of his hands deftly removing her clothes from her until he broke contact long enough to carry her to the bed and laid her down, tossing the towel away before joining her. The sensation of flesh on flesh drove every other thought from her head. It felt right, it felt good, and her body flowered as she longed to be closer to his dizzying heat. His hand traced the graceful line of her thigh upwards, across her fluttering stomach, until it found and claimed her breast. His mouth followed, teasing the turgid peak with lips and teeth before drawing her into his mouth. Her head went back, eyes closing as she couldn’t help but press her quivering flesh against the source of such devastatingly bewitching torture.
Crazy or not, she wanted this. Wanted it with a desperation which turned her body molten and started up an aching throb deep within her. All her movements were jerky and uncoordinated as she finally allowed herself to respond in the way she had longed to do since the moment she realised she still loved him. The feel of his solid flesh against hers was dizzying, and the thrusting evidence of Pierce’s arousal made her groan and move against him in an invitation as old as time itself.
When his head lifted, she let out a moan of protest, but it was only so that he could work the same nerve-tensing pleasure on her other breast. His tongue stroked and teased until she was ready to scream, but it was the greedy suckling which followed that took her voice as her hips arched against his, moving with an urgency that she no longer cared about. She was wild for him, wanted to feel him inside her, filling her, taking away the emptiness and loneliness of the past years. She thrust her fingers into his hair, dragging his head up to hers to tell him so, but before she could utter a syllable his mouth claimed hers again, tongue thrusting in an erotic parody which she met and matched feverishly.
She was burning up with need, and her every movement told him so. Yet she barely registered the long caress of his hand along her thigh, or its journey upwards again to the moist core of her. Only when his hand closed possessively around her and his fingers began a stroking caress did she gasp. She wanted to protest that this wasn’t what she wanted, but already her body was tensing, coiling as he expertly urged her towards the peak she so desperately sought.
Even as partial release caught her with a sobbing cry Pierce moved over her, easing her thighs apart and entering her with compelling mastery. Breathlessly she rose to meet his thrusts, and in wonder felt that coil of tension begin to grow, yet deeper and more powerful this time, as he filled her, making her his in the most intimate way of all.
Their need was too violent for the moment to last long, and they climaxed within seconds of each other. With a shuddering cry, Pierce collapsed on to her, and, dazed as she was by a pleasure so complete, she still welcomed him, arms curving possessively about his heaving shoulders. She didn’t want to think, just wanted to hold on to him. What they had just shared had been wild and wonderful. There would be time enough later for all the questions.
Pierce’s breathing settled, and she wondered if he had fallen asleep. Her eyes closed too, but after a while his weight began to feel uncomfortable, and, taking care, she tried to ease out from beneath him—only to feel one large hand close about her hip as he tensed.
‘No!’ he muttered against her skin, the words coming from him as if they were driven. ‘I’m not going to lose you again.’
Alix gasped at the barely audible admission. Her heart swelled inside her, and sudden tears welled behind her eyes. To hear her supremely self-confident husband say that filled the aching void. He cared. He had to. But was it love? She didn’t know, but right now what she had was enough. Because until now she had had nothing.
Consequently, her voice was low and husky as she said, ‘I’m not going anywhere. You’re just too heavy.’
Still more asleep than awake, he eased off her with a muttered, ‘Sorry,’ but he took her with him, curling her into the curves of his body and holding her th
ere with his arm.
Alix had never felt more cherished or secure. Home was in his arms whether he loved her or not, but she hoped to God that he did love her, because she could no longer hide her love for him. Her lashes dropped once more. Tomorrow she would know. Tomorrow.
* * *
They were awoken in the morning by a strangely familiar noise. Pierce stirred first, and it was his movements which brought Alix back reluctantly to the land of the living. She was still lying in his arms, but even as the sight of their naked bodies, intimately entwined together, brought memories of the night Pierce was easing away from her and leaving the bed. Coming up on her elbow, she focused blearily on his straight back as he went to the window.
‘What is it?’ she asked, not quite functioning enough to make the identification, yet well enough to appreciate the taut curve of his buttocks and the muscles in his thighs. A cat-like smile tilted her lips as she imagined her hands running over them, which they could do, if he would only come back to bed.
Pierce heaved a deep sigh, and squared his shoulders. ‘It’s the helicopter,’ he informed her in a grim voice, which instantly banished the state of delicious lethargy she had been happy to bask in, making her sit up and take notice.
A tiny frown cut into her forehead as she realised he didn’t seem in the least surprised by the arrival. On the contrary. ‘Were you expecting it?’
Turning away from the window, Pierce dragged both hands through his hair and reached for his robe. ‘I arranged for it last night, but I didn’t expect to oversleep this morning.’
The fact that he had known, yet said nothing, brought an unnamed fear to chill her blood. Alix found that her mouth had gone dry. ‘Why is it here?’ she asked in a voice that croaked.
Pierce glanced at her briefly. ‘I’m afraid the honeymoon is over, Alix,’ he told her flatly, and it was the very lack of emotion as he spoke which made her heart kick in sudden inexplicable anxiety.
It was like dj vu, as if the events of five years ago were happening all over again. Yet she refused to give in to the panic which hovered on the edges of her consciousness. She was not yet ready to accept that last night had meant nothing.
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