Mom In The Making

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Mom In The Making Page 8

by Carla Cassidy


  Brenda Jo’s eyebrows bounced up in surprise. “Honey, the gossip I heard isn’t half as juicy as your confession.”

  Bonnie’s face warmed. She should have just kept her mouth shut. “Just pretend I didn’t say anything, okay?”

  Brenda Jo leaned back in her chair and grinned. “I’m not sure I can do that. I’d like to hear more about this kiss that didn’t mean anything. Sounds to me like a case of the lady protesting too much.”

  “Don’t be ridiculous. I’ve got typing to do,” Bonnie replied, escaping into the storage room, with Brenda Jo’s laughter following her.

  Rolling a clean form into the typewriter, Bonnie shoved all memories of Russ and the kiss out of her head. She didn’t have time to entertain thoughts of a man who was totally inappropriate for her. There was absolutely no future in falling into any kind of a relationship with Russ.

  She worked without stop for the next hour, pleased with the progress she’d made with the stack of forms. Deciding to take a break and get a cup of coffee from the community pot in the back room, she left her desk. She yelped in surprise as she bumped into Russ’s broad chest.

  “Whoa.”

  He caught her by her upper arms, his fingers lingering with warmth against her bare skin. “What are you doing here so early?” she asked, flustered by his unexpected appearance.

  “Beau called me and asked me to cover for him. He’s going out to help with some of the downed trees from the storm last night.”

  His gaze roved her face, lingering on her mouth, and she knew he was remembering their kiss. As his thumbs moved in tiny circles against her skin, she stepped away from him.

  “Running away again, Bonnie?” he asked, amusement quirking his lips.

  “Don’t be ridiculous,” she scoffed. “I was just on my way to get some coffee.” She scooted past him, irritated when he followed her.

  In the tiny back room that served as a combination break room and kitchenette, she went directly to the coffee maker and filled her cup. When she turned around he stood right in front of her.

  “You look tired,” he observed. “Didn’t yon sleep well?” He grinned. “Maybe you need to check beneath your mattress for a pea, Princess.”

  “I slept fine.” She lifted her chin and smiled. “The deep, dreamless sleep of the innocent.”

  He chuckled. “Now, why do I find that hard to believe?”

  Bonnie shrugged, too tired, too confused, to spar with him. “I’ve got to get back to work.” She scooted around him, then turned back to him once again. “By the way, Carolyn is having a barbecue next Sunday for Beau’s birthday. She’d like you and Daniel to come.”

  “Sounds good. What time?”

  “Around. two.”

  He grinned again, the teasing gesture that set Bonnie’s teeth on edge.

  “Is this a date?”

  “Hmm, like I’d ask you for a date,” she scoffed.

  “Like I’d accept,” he countered, then grinned again, obviously enjoying their little verbal game.

  With an exasperated sigh she turned and left. He watched as she went down the corridor and disappeared into the storage room. He was sorry she’d slept well. He’d hoped she’d tossed and turned as he had, playing and replaying their kiss in her mind.

  He walked over to the coffeepot and poured himself a cup, wondering what he was going to do about his lustful feelings for Bonnie Baker.

  He’d known kissing her would be a major mistake, but damned if he could control the urge. And sure enough, it had been. Because he wanted to repeat the mistake... again and again and again.

  Maybe an affair with her was just what he needed. A hot, brief affair that would get his desire for her out of his system once and for all. It made sense—rather than fighting his passion, to go with it, allow it to take over. It sounded wonderful, thrilling, but he knew he wouldn’t do it.

  Sipping his coffee, he walked back to his desk and sat down, his mind still unclear about what he wanted from Bonnie. He’d never been the type of man to contemplate a relationship without emotional commitment. And he knew the price he’d pay for an emotional commitment to somebody as weak, as fickle, as Bonnie. That price was too high.

  If he was smart, he’d stay away from her. Refuse to get involved on any level. Within a couple of months Bonnie would get her next inheritance check and she’d be gone. Yes, if he was smart he’d keep his distance. He’d made one big mistake with Anne. He wasn’t about to make another.

  He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. For once in his life it would be nice if he could be a wild and crazy boxers man and follow his hormones without the involvement of his heart.

  “I can’t believe Beau is so late getting home,” Carolyn said, for the third time in an hour walking over to the front window and peering out into the twilight.

  “There must have been a lot of damage from the storm,” Bonnie replied. She sat in the center of the living room, the twins next to her and a pile of building blocks before them. “Come sit down and stop being a worrywart. I’m sure he’ll be home soon.”

  Carolyn sank back down on the sofa, a frown still creasing the center of her forehead. “The roast is going to be all dried out,” she said, more to herself than to anyone.

  Bonnie grinned. “Most of your roasts usually are.” She ducked as Carolyn threw a decorative pillow at her. As Bonnie built a block tower with the boys, her thoughts turned to Russ. Thankfully she had managed to avoid him for most of the day, but she was still so confused where he was concerned.

  She couldn’t deny she felt something for him, something she’d never felt before. A part of her wanted to allow things to play out, see where it carried them. Another part of her wanted to run... fast and far away.

  She looked up, drawn from her thoughts as Carolyn jumped off the sofa.

  “I’ve got to do something. Want a glass of iced tea?”

  “Sure,” Bonnie agreed. As Carolyn disappeared into the kitchen, Bonnie turned her attention back to the kids. She pulled Brent into her lap, smelling his fresh, clean scent. He leaned against her, so trusting, so completely accepting. She thought of Daniel, his features hardened with belligerence, his eyes angry and mistrustful.

  Whoever eventually married Russ would have her hands full with that child. Did Russ even realize his son was a problem? Couldn’t he see that Daniel needed some hard and fast discipline? Bonnie loved children, but she had a feeling even Mother Teresa would have problems loving a kid like Daniel.

  “Here you go.” Carolyn reentered with two glasses .of tea.

  Bonnie sat Brent back on the floor, then stood up and took the drink. “While Beau is gone, why don’t we make plans for his birthday barbecue?” she suggested, hoping to take Carolyn’s mind off Beau’s lateness.

  “Did you ask Russ today about coming?”

  Bonnie nodded. “He said he and Daniel would be here.”

  She sat down on the sofa and motioned for Carolyn to sit beside her. “So who else are you inviting to this barbecue?”

  “Waylon and his family, and of course Brenda Jo.”

  “Did you know she dates LIoyd Kingburg?”

  “Lloyd Kingburg? You mean the older man who works in the grocery store? The one who blushes every time anyone asks him a question?” Bonnie nodded and they both giggled. Carolyn shook her head and laughed again. “It’s just hard to believe. Brenda Jo is so colorful, so bold, and Lloyd seems so shy and timid.”

  “You know what they say about opposites attracting,” Bonnie remarked, then sobered as she realized that’s exactly what Russ had said to explain the attraction they felt for each other.

  For the next half hour the two sisters discussed the rest of the guest list and the menu for the birthday barbecue. “Beau loves ribs, and Waylon has promised to be in charge of the cooking. I’m ordering the potato salad and baked beans, and we’ll have chips and relishes,” Carolyn explained.

  “Stop. You’re making me hungry,” Bonnie replied. Both of them jumped as a knock
sounded at the front door. “I’ll get it,” she said. She opened the door and stepped back in surprise. “Russ!”

  Carolyn stood up from the sofa as Russ stepped inside. Her hand flew to her mouth as she looked at the unsmiling man. “Oh, God, it’s Beau, isn’t it? Something has happened to him.”

  “No! No, Beau is fine,” Russ hurriedly reassured her. “He’s over at the Briggs Funeral Home. He was out in a field helping with some downed lines, and... well... they found a body.”

  Russ looked distinctly uncomfortable, and Bonnie’s heart thudded in apprehension.

  “Russ, why are you here?” Bonnie finally asked.

  He appeared pained, his gaze going from Bonnie to Carolyn, then back again. “The man we found...he’s been dead for a while... stabbed. We found his identification in his wallet. We’re afraid it’s... Sam.”

  Carolyn cried out, and Bonnie reached for her, needing to hang on to her sister as Russ’s words slowly sank in. Sam dead? The words whirled in Bonnie’s head as Carolyn sobbed against her shoulder. Russ became a blur as Bonnie’s eyes filled, although not before she saw compassion softening his features.

  He cleared his throat and shifted from foot to foot. “I need one of you to come with me to make a positive identification.”

  Carolyn raised her head and stared at Bonnie in horror. “I don’t think I can,” she whispered.

  “It’s all right. You don’t have to. I’ll go.” Bonnie drew a deep breath, fingers of dread walking up her spine. She didn’t want to do this—dear God, she didn’t want to. She wanted to hop on a plane, drive away in a car, anything that would keep her from dealing with this horror.

  However, she wouldn’t run. Carolyn needed her now, and for once in her life, Bonnie intended to do the right thing.

  She led Carolyn back to the sofa. “You stay here with the kids. I’ll take care of this.” She leaned over and gave her sister a hug, then straightened and looked at Russ. “Let’s get this over with.”

  Russ led her out to his car and she slid into the passenger seat, her mind still grappling with the idea that Sam was dead.

  All the waiting and wondering about her brother’s whereabouts, all the worry about his safety had been for naught. She closed her eyes, thinking of Sam’s wife and their little girl. A wife without a husband. A daughter without her daddy. A tear spilled down her cheek. A sister without a brother.

  The car pulled to a stop, the engine shut off, and still Bonnie kept her eyes closed, gathering strength for what lay ahead.

  “You okay?”

  Russ’s voice was soft, his hand warm as he reached over and gently touched her shoulder.

  She opened her eyes and nodded, staring at the funeral home in front of them. “Why did they bring him here?” she asked. “Don’t they usually take... bodies to a morgue?”

  Russ nodded. “Casey’s Corners doesn’t have a morgue. The city has an arrangement with the funeral home.”

  She drew in a deep, tremulous breath and opened her car door. “Let’s go.”

  They were met at the door by Beau, who expressed surprise at seeing Bonnie instead of Carolyn. Russ understood his surprise. He, too, had just assumed Carolyn would be the one to make the identification.

  “Bonnie... I’m sorry you have to do this,” Beau said in greeting.

  She nodded and gave him a quick hug. “Go home, Beau,” she said as she released him. “Go home to Carolyn. Russ can take me in. Caro needs you with her.”

  Beau exchanged a questioning glance with Russ. “I’ll handle things here,” Russ replied. With a final hug to Bonnie, Beau took off for his car.

  Russ placed his arm around Bonnie’s shoulders, unable to fight his need to support her, comfort her. For a moment she leaned into him, as if drawing strength from his embrace. Russ tightened his arms around her, smelling the scent of her clean hair, as he felt a tremor shake through her.

  She finally pulled away from him, her chin lifted in the now-familiar gesture of boldness. “Come on, let’s get this over with.” Not waiting for him, she strode through the front door, her posture rigid with determination.

  Russ followed behind, admiring Bonnie’s courage, her strength. She could have insisted Carolyn come—in truth, that’s what he’d expected. It had surprised him to see Carolyn fall apart and Bonnie be the strong one. Once again he realized Bonnie had risen above his expectations, and it unsettled him.

  When they entered the funeral home, Russ led Bonnie down a flight of stairs. Before taking her into the room where the body was kept, he picked up an item from a nearby table and held it out to Bonnie. “Can you tell me if this is your brother’s?” he asked.

  She opened the tanned, leather wallet and sagged against the wall. Russ already knew what was inside—a wad of money, several credit cards and a picture of a woman and a little, dark-haired girl. She caught her bottom lip between her teeth as she stared at the photograph. When she looked up at Russ, her eyes were huge, sparkling with tears she seemed to hold back by mere stubbornness alone.

  “This is Sam’s wife and his daughter.”

  Russ nodded and took the wallet from her. He handed her a gold wedding band. “What about this?”

  She studied it, noting the initials engraved on the inside. “Yes... yes, it’s Sam’s.”

  The tears sparkled more brightly, clinging to her lashes and causing Russ’s heart to ache for her.

  “Bonnie, I don’t think it’s necessary for you to see the body. You’ve identified these things as belonging to him.” Russ wanted to get her out of there. He couldn’t stand the tears, wanted to see her eyes flash with fire, the amused arch of an eyebrow, that naughty grin.

  She gave him back the wallet and the ring and sagged against the wall once again. Closing her eyes for a moment, she let her shoulders droop with sorrow. She felt so vulnerable. But it lasted only a moment. Straightening, she looked at him once again, this time the tears gone, replaced by an implacable strength. “I have to do it. I have to see him. Otherwise it won’t be real.”

  Russ nodded. Placing an arm around her, he opened the door and led her into the room. He tightened his embrace as they got closer. Taking a deep breath, he removed the sheet, exposing the face of the dead man.

  Bonnie gasped and hid her face against Russ’s chest. With an emotional oath, Russ pulled the sheet back up and pulled her out of the room.

  She was crying now, her sobs soft, but deep. “Shhh,” Russ whispered, stroking her hair; rubbing her back, wishing he could take the pain away from her. “I’m sorry, Bonnie. I’m so sorry.”

  She shook her head, a burst of laughter escaping through the sobs. She’s hysterical, he thought, his heart aching for her. He tightened his arms around her as if he could shield her from the heartache.

  “Russ—oh, God.” She struggled away from him, freeing herself and staring at him. “Oh, Russ, that’s not my brother.”

  He stared at her, unable to comprehend what she was telling him. “Bonnie, what are you talking about?”

  “That man in there. I don’t know who he is, but he’s not Sam.”

  Chapter Seven

  “Russ, I’m telling you—that man in there is not my brother,” Bonnie repeated.

  “But the ring... the wallet?” Russ stared at her in bewilderment.

  “I don’t know how he got Sam’s things. I can’t explain any of it.” She grabbed Russ’s arm and tugged him toward the stairs. “Come on, let’s get out of here. We’ve got to tell Carolyn.”

  When they got back outside, Bonnie threw her arms around Russ’s neck. “Oh, Russ, I feel like singing and dancing.” The happiness on her face faded and she bit her bottom lip. “It’s horrible to be happy. I mean, that man is somebody’s son, maybe somebody’s husband. You must think I’m awful to feel so relieved.”

  Russ smiled at her and ran his fingertip down the side of her face. “You aren’t awful. You’re human.” He cupped her chin, wanting to capture the softness of her features, this moment when her defenses were down
and vulnerability shone in her eyes.

  Without thought, he bent his head and touched her lips gently, softly, with his own. He ended the kiss immediately and drew back, saw the confusion in her eyes and felt an echo of the same emotion inside himself. “Come on, let’s go tell Carolyn and Beau,” he said.

  They rode back to the house in silence. Russ glanced at Bonnie again and again, seeing the exhaustion mixed with relief on her face. She leaned against the passenger-side door, as if too tired to sit up straight. He knew she was feeling the aftermath of the emotional roller coaster of the past hour. “You okay?” he finally asked, needing to break the silence, connect with her in some way.

  She nodded. “Just thinking.”

  She shifted positions, leaned closer to him as if needing the same thing he did... a connection with somebody warm and alive.

  “I’m so glad it wasn’t Sam, but that puts us right back where we started. Where is Sam, and why in God’s name doesn’t he contact one of us? Why hasn’t he turned himself in to the police and tried to prove his innocence in Father’s murder?” She rubbed her forehead, as if the questions were simply too much to handle.

  Russ reached out and touched her hand with his. “I wish I had the answers for you. So far Beau hasn’t come up with any answers, either.”

  “I wish I knew how that man got Sam’s wallet and his wedding ring. Sam never took that ring off.”

  Her hand curled, her fingers entwining with his, and he knew she was afraid that Sam hadn’t given up the wedding band voluntarily.

  He gently squeezed her hand. “Perhaps we’ll have some answers when we get an ID on the dead man.”

  She nodded and was quiet. She didn’t relinquish her hold on his hand, nor did Russ break the contact. It wasn’t until he pulled into the Randolf driveway and parked behind Beau’s car that he finally released her hand to shut off the engine.

  “Russ, thank you for being here for me.”

  Her gaze lingered on him, again a touch of confusion darkening their blue depths. He wondered what was going on in that crazy head of hers. He wondered why he cared.

 

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