Even as the words slipped out of my mouth, I regretted them. They sounded ungrateful and dismissive, but worst of all they were lies. There was nothing more I wanted than for Fox to stay and Annabelle to awaken with no fever.
“But if you wanted to hang out for a little while, that would be fine too.” Hopefully by now Fox was used to me just blurting things out and then taking them back. The half-smile on his face told me that he probably was.
“I’m not going anywhere.”
“Okay.” I hoped my cup hid at least part of my grin.
We sat there and drank coffee until almost two in the morning, alternating between small talk and the low hum of late-night television. The intensity from earlier was gone, but I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that at times I wanted to climb into his lap and see what happened from there.
* * *
After we said goodbye – Fox declined the cab and chose to jog the four miles home instead of taking my car, just in case I needed it – I finally succumbed to exhaustion and curled up on the couch next to Annabelle. I woke the next morning to a horrible kink in my neck and a hungry three year old with an almost-normal temperature.
After a much-needed potty break – one for Annabelle and one for me – I was in the kitchen making breakfast toast when my mom called to check on us.
“She’s doing much better, Mom,” I assured her. “I think that bath really helped her last night.”
“I’m so glad, sweetheart. I’m sorry that we had to take you from your date, but your father and I decided it was best to call you right away.”
“Annabelle is way more important, you know that. Thank you for taking such good care of her.” My voice cracked just a tiny bit when I recalled the feeling of seeing those missed calls.
“Did Fox stay long?” My mom made every attempt to sound casual, but I knew she was fishing.
“Um, a little while,” I admitted, my cheeks flaming immediately. I was glad we were on the phone and that she couldn’t see my physical reaction to her question.
“That was very nice of him to bring you home so quickly, Avery,” she commented. “Did you run into him at the bar?”
Fishing again. “It was a group of us, Mom,” I explained. “Fox heard me say that Annabelle was sick and he insisted on coming.”
“Your daddy thinks a great deal of him,” she said. “Says he’s smart and very accomplished.”
I wasn’t sure what to say, but I was instantly curious about what else my dad had said about Fox. “That’s good,” I replied neutrally, hoping she’d elaborate.
“Mmmhmm.” She paused. “I just don’t want you to get hurt, Avery. A boy like that has nomad in his veins. Can’t stay in one place for too long. We all know how that ends.”
My face burned again as I realized she was referencing J.D. Annabelle’s biological father was nothing like Fox, and I resented her for comparing them. She’d just said my father liked Fox, and everyone knew that my dad had never, under any circumstances, approved of J.D. They were as different as night and day. I appreciated my mother’s concern, but she was way off the mark and I told her so.
“Fox is not J.D., Mother.” The edge to my voice lent extra emphasis to my words.
“I’m sure you’re right. Just remember what I said.” She changed the subject. “Give Annabelle a kiss from us and call if you need anything. Goodbye, sweetheart.”
I hung up the phone feeling antsy. The conversation with my mother reminded me that I had another important call to make. As much as I hated doing it over the phone, I couldn’t allow the Chase situation to go on any longer, especially after my almost-whatever with Fox last night. I checked the clock. Still kind of early, but I needed to do it before I lost my nerve.
The phone rang three times before he answered with a muffled hello.
“Chase? It’s Avery,” I told him, in case he hadn’t looked at the caller ID.
“Hey,” he said slowly, the word sounding like it was causing him pain.
“Are you okay?” I asked even though I already knew the answer. Chase sounded like he had the hangover from hell. Maybe this wasn’t the best time to talk to him, but selfishly I pressed on before he could answer. “Do you remember last night when I said we needed to talk?”
“Um, sort of,” he replied.
I figured that much. I took a deep breath. “Look, this isn’t the way I wanted to have this conversation, but I’m just going to say it. I think we need to take a step back and stop seeing each other for now. We haven’t been getting along and I don’t want things to get any worse.” Silence from his end. Shit. “Your friendship means a lot to me,” I said honestly.
Chase coughed. “Okay, if that’s what you want.”
The part of me that wanted to be offended by his quick dismissal was overruled by the part that was incredibly relieved that he took it so well. “You’re not mad?” I asked timidly.
He chuckled and then groaned a little. Headache, for sure. “No babe, I’m not mad. I’m a little surprised, I gotta be honest, but I think you’re right about us not getting along. I really do hate fighting with you.”
“It’s not very fun for me either,” I agreed.
“So, let’s just cool it for a while, okay? No big deal. I’ll call you next week, I’m gonna be in and out of town in Midland and Lubbock for a while. You know, work stuff.” His last sentence was a bit muffled, like he’d covered his head with the blanket.
“Um, okay.” I wasn’t sure what we would say to each other next week, but I felt like I’d gotten my point across fairly well just now.
“Oh hey, how’s Annabelle?” Chase asked like he'd just had an epiphany.
I shook my head, glad he couldn’t see me roll my eyes. The way I ran out of the bar last night, you’d think it’d be the first thing anyone would ask me, but no, not Chase. Be fair, Avery, I thought. He’s obviously not firing on all cylinders this morning.
“She’s better, thanks.”
“Cool. Talk to you later, babe. I’m going back to sleep.” His voice had that muffled quality to it again.
“Goodbye, Chase.”
Chapter 11
Annabelle and I stopped into the diner for a quick milkshake two nights later. She was back to school and feeling fine, but we hadn’t seen Fox in a couple days and that was enough to make me pack us up after dinner and head out. I wasn’t sure if he knew I’d cooled things down with Chase, leaving us both free to see other people.
You know, just in case there was someone I wanted to see. Or be seen by.
When we walked into the diner, I glanced around, hoping for Fox’s familiar blond hair tied back in his usual bandanna. Annabelle ran straight for the crayons, the novelty of being at the diner still enough to hold her interest. I knew her enthusiasm probably had a shelf life, but my curious mind couldn’t stay away from Fox.
Joy waved at us from behind the counter. “Hi girls! Mighty nice to see you tonight. Are you feeling better, sweet pea?” She scooped Annabelle up and planted a kiss on her forehead. Annabelle giggled and scrambled down to start her latest masterpiece.
“Hi,” I said, still trying to spot Fox without craning my neck awkwardly.
Joy saw right through me, I knew, but she wasn’t pressing for details just yet. The smirk on her face told me that she had at least an idea of what was going on.
“Looking for someone?” Her grin widened, and I rolled my eyes.
“We just came in for a milkshake,” I muttered.
“And to see Mr. Fox!” Annabelle sang from her barstool. “He’s our new friend!”
Oh Jesus, that little traitor sold me out. Joy could barely contain her laughter as she turned to Annabelle.
“He’s gone for the day, sweetheart. Did he know you were comin’?” Joy slid her eyes sideways to me.
“We see him all the time now!” Annabelle scribbled on her paper with a flourish. Joy covered her mouth with her hand, but not before I heard a snort.
Please stop talking, kid. You’re killing
me.
I saw Joy’s eyes shift as she focused on a spot just over my shoulder and dropped her hand to reveal her wide smile. My pulse jumped immediately because I knew there was only one person who could be behind me.
I turned to see Fox striding up to the counter, the sparkle in his eyes indicating that he’d heard everything Annabelle just said. Of course he had. That was just my luck. I was completely incapable of playing it cool with him.
He focused on me with his usual intense stare, but this time it held a little something extra. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it, but it almost seemed… relieved? Before I could analyze it too deeply, Annabelle spun her chair around and spotted him.
“Mr. Fox! I knew you’d come!” She launched herself off the stool and clutched his legs tightly in a hug.
Fox laughed that deep, rough chuckle, and I felt it grab my heart and reverberate through my core. I loved that laugh, and it was far too infrequent. I often saw Fox engaged, or even amused, but rarely did he laugh. It made me happy that Annabelle could bring it out in him.
Fox disentangled himself from Annabelle’s embrace and squatted down to her level. “You bet.” Gently, he pushed a lock of her shiny blond hair behind her ear. The tenderness in the way he touched her shattered my already overworked heart into a million pieces.
Annabelle grinned at him. “I’ll draw you another picture, Mr. Fox,” she promised. “Because we’re friends.”
“If we’re friends, then you need to call me Fox. No Mister. Can you do that?” he asked her.
She nodded. “Yup.”
“Good girl. Now, what flavor milkshake would you like? Chocolate?” He looked up at me from his position crouching on the floor. “Is that okay, Mama?”
His words combined with the heat in those green eyes made my ovaries hurt, but I managed a nod even as I protested. “Fox, you’re off the clock. I can make the milkshake.”
He rose to his full height in a fluid motion, gracefully sidestepping around Annabelle until his chest almost bumped mine. I took a step back automatically, but he followed to maintain our closeness.
“Would you like one, Avery?”
One what? One of you? I’ll take ten.
“Um,” I managed. His eyes bored into mine.
Joy cleared her throat, and I jumped back again.
“I think he wants to make you a milkshake, girl,” she drawled, and I shot her a dirty look. I heard Fox chuckle under his breath again as he made his way to the kitchen.
“I’ll surprise you,” he said.
Oh buddy. You have no idea.
Annabelle and I prepared to leave after chatting with Joy and Fox while downing our delicious milkshakes – chocolate for her, pumpkin cheesecake for me – when Fox caught my hand.
“Can I ask you for a big favor, Avery?”
Dude, you can pretty much ask me for whatever you want. You like my kid, you carried my groceries, you’ve got that intuitive-hot-guy thing going on, and your skin feels amazing against mine. You’re basically my kryptonite.
“Sure,” I said. A normal answer in a normal sounding voice. Score one for me.
Fox hesitated for a second before he spoke. “Are you going to be on campus this week by any chance? I had some things come in that need to be picked up near there, and I can’t do it alone.”
It was like all the stars aligned right then. I was, in fact, heading to my college in the morning, but even if I wasn’t, I’d make the trip for Fox.
“Actually, yes, I was planning on heading out there tomorrow around nine. Does that work for you? I’ll have to be back before three.” I had a pile of laundry, a kitchen to scrub, and a paper to research, but fuck it. Tomorrow after my study group, I’d play hooky from adulthood with Fox for a few hours.
Fox’s dimple jumped out at me from a megawatt smile. “That’s great. I really appreciate it.”
“Should I meet you here?” I asked.
“I can come to you,” Fox replied. “We’ll need to take the diner’s pickup truck.”
I wondered what it was that Fox needed to retrieve, but as usual he wasn’t exactly forthcoming with information. I supposed I’d find out soon enough. It made me undeniably happy that he was having his belongings shipped here, because maybe that meant that he was going to be around for at least a bit longer.
“Okay,” I said, realizing Fox was still holding my hand.
He looked down as if he’d just noticed it himself, and then squeezed. “Tomorrow, then.”
* * *
The next morning, I had Annabelle ready and out the door in record time.
“I’ll be here to get you after school, baby,” I told her as we walked up to her classroom. I waved at her teacher and gave Annabelle a quick hug.
“Okay, Mama!” I watched her skip to the back of the class where some of her friends were already engrossed in a very serious watercolor painting session.
I made myself walk at a reasonable pace to the car, but I really wanted to run home as quickly as possible so I would have more than a few minutes to get ready before Fox picked me up.
I’d just finished wrestling a deceptively casual-looking waterfall braid through the front of my wavy hair when I heard Fox pull up. I checked the mirror. Skinny jeans, flat sandals, and a loose-fitting lace-trimmed tank seemed appropriate for the occasion – simple but still cute. I used a light hand on my makeup, highlighting my eyes with a little shimmer and extra mascara, and nude gloss on my lips.
This is not a date, I repeated in my head. This is two friends helping each other out. The fact that you wore a matching bra and lacy boy-shorts set is completely coincidental and doesn’t mean anyone else is going to see it.
The doorbell rang and once again, I made myself walk. When I opened the door and saw Fox, I couldn’t suppress my happiness. For a second, we both just looked at each other, and I felt that gaze said a hundred things we hadn’t yet said aloud.
But we would someday. Of that I was now sure.
Maybe I needed more nice underwear.
“Hi,” he said, his dimple peeking at me from a small smile. I was accustomed to seeing him in a diner shirt and full apron with his hair tied back, all of which he pulled off with unprecedented appeal. But in regular clothes, it was a million times better.
Today he was wearing simple, well-fitting jeans worn in all the right places. His boots were broken in and loosely tied, and his dark T-shirt accentuated his arms and shoulders. His longish blond hair was dark, still wet from a recent shower, and casually combed back away from his face. Two days of stubble decorated his face and brought out the strong shape of his jaw. He was beautiful and I loved looking at him, especially now that I could do it without feeling guilty.
My guilty feelings were replaced by lots of other feelings now, and those were likely written all over my face. I felt his eyes roam from the tips of my toes to the top of my head quickly but intently, like he was trying to memorize me.
“Hi,” I said shyly. There were two choices whenever I was with Fox – tongue-tied or word vomit. Today was the former.
He gestured to the truck. “Are you ready to go?”
I grabbed my bag from its hook and closed the front door tightly behind me. Fox offered an outstretched hand and I took it without a second thought. He laced his fingers tightly through mine as we walked the few short steps to the passenger side of the truck, where he unlocked the door and helped me inside.
He let go of my hand to shut the door and jog around to the driver’s side, and I felt the loss immediately. I was fairly certain it was just a chivalrous reflex that coincided with helping me into the truck, but it seemed more intimate than that. If our new friendship step was hand-holding, I wasn’t mad about it. I relished that Fox was sitting next to me in the cab, filling it with his cedarwood and soap smell.
Turning to me, he slipped on his sunglasses. “School first?” he asked.
I’d set my bag down by my feet when I got into the truck, and I quickly rummaged through it to make sure
I had the folders I needed. “That’d be great, thanks. I have a quick study group to catch.”
Fox flashed me his dimple. “You’re doing me the favor by accompanying me. I’m yours all day.”
How about forever? Wait, what? Get a grip, Avery. “Okay,” I smiled.
There wasn’t much in the way of scenery between Brancher and the campus, but that was fine with me because Fox was much more fun to look at. With my sunglasses on I felt more daring, like I could openly stare if I chose, but instead I snuck glances at him as we bounced around in the roomy cab of the old truck, admiring the way his hand flexed on the steering wheel or the casual slouch of his shoulder as he rested his elbow on the window sill.
“I like you like this,” I blurted impulsively.
He took his eyes off the road for a second to look in my direction, his quirky Fox half-smile on his lips. “Like what?”
“I don’t know. Relaxed. You’re usually kind of intense, you know?” Here comes the babbling. “I mean, you’ve said so yourself. It’s not a bad thing. You’re so focused and dedicated, it makes sense…” I trailed off.
Fox laughed once, that rusty chuckle. “I suppose you’re right.”
“It must be exhausting,” I mused, thinking of what it was like for Fox to be constantly on alert. “Is it?”
“Sometimes.” He looked over at me again quickly, but his expression was unreadable behind his sunglasses.
When he didn’t say anything else, I nodded, leaning my head back against the seat, and looked out the window. The flat, barren West Texas land stretched on for what seemed like eternity, but I knew we were only about ten minutes from campus.
“I like it here,” Fox said suddenly, breaking the comfortable silence. “It feels like normal life.”
“Boring life, you mean,” I laughed.
He shrugged. “Ordinary can be underrated.”
I immediately thought about the video he'd made of Annabelle in the diner, how he took regular things and made them look like something amazing. It was a perspective I greatly admired.
Hey Sunshine Page 12