by Amelia Grey
He was strongly appealing, but Mirabella slowly shook her head. Camden’s fingers squeezed into the flesh of her upper arms, but she paid no mind to the pain he caused. “No,” she whispered regretfully.
He uttered a shocked, “No?”
He let her go as if she’d suddenly turned into a hot poker. He laid his head on the back of the carriage seat and shoved his feet into the opposite seat.
Camden expelled an audible sigh. “You exasperate me to the point of madness, Mirabella. When I think I’m at the point of trusting you, you do something else to give me reason not to. What do you want to gain, to prove? Are you trying to see if you can cause a bigger scandal in my life than what Hortense did to me six years ago?”
She moved to the edge of the seat and looked at him. “No. No. Of course not! How could you think that?”
“What am I to think?”
“Half the ton saw your first fiancée in her lover’s arms. No one but you and Uncle Archer has seen me in anyone’s arms. And no one recognized me tonight.”
“Correction. I recognized you tonight. And, no one has admitted to seeing you in anyone’s arms or to being in your arms, because I threatened their lives if they dare utter a word against you.”
“You didn’t!” she exclaimed.
“Of course I did. That’s how gossip is stopped.”
Mirabella’s mind was whirling. Had he really threatened someone’s life? To save her?
“So it’s true what was said in the Society Daily about you having a scuffle with two men.”
“More or less, it’s true.”
She saw in his expression that he spoke the truth. Her heart swelled with love. Love? Yes. She loved him. This all-consuming need to be with him, to enjoy him, had to be love.
Oh, merciful heavens, could things get worse? When did she fall in love with Camden? What could she do about it? He could never love her. He could never forgive what she had done. Already he likened her to his first fiancée.
“Just when I think I might start understanding you, I catch you doing something completely unacceptable again. How many times am I going to have to save your reputation?”
“I don’t know,” she managed to say with a gasping breath.
“I do. This is the last.”
Mirabella heard and saw the bewilderment he was feeling. She didn’t mean to vex him so. Maybe she should tell him what she had been trying to accomplish and why. Would he believe her? Would he try to help her, or would he insist she stop her search immediately? She was so close to finding the man she sought.
“Tell me what you were doing in that club dressed like this. Albert Farebrother, the Earl of Glenbrighton, was in there tonight. He could have recognized you. Anyone could have.”
“But only you did.”
“That is not the point.” He raked both hands through his hair, skimming it away from his forehead, and turned to look at her. “My patience is gone, Mirabella. I realize this ruse of an engagement was my idea, and I’m working hard to put my family’s finances in order, but this stunt tonight is beyond the pale. The way I see it you have two choices. You can either tell me what you are doing dressed as you are, or when we get to your house we will march straight to your father’s bedroom and you can tell both of us your very good reasons for being in that gentlemen’s club.”
“No. I—” She laid her hand on his chest. She felt him stiffen, and it broke her heart that he didn’t want her to touch him. She removed her hand. “You must not disturb my father. There’s no telling what it would do to his heart to be awakened before dawn and find me dressed in his clothes. I will do anything you want.”
His expression softened, but his voice remained firm. “I don’t want you to do anything, Mirabella. I want you to tell me the truth.”
She leaned closer over his chest. Right now she could look for Sarah’s seducer and be a part of Camden’s life. If she told him what she was doing there was the chance he would walk away and never see her again just as he was threatening right now.
“Don’t make me. Telling you the truth frightens me.”
For a moment she felt he had weakened and would relent, but he softly said, “What do you fear? Surely not me.”
Still she hesitated.
“Mirabella, right now I’m thinking money be damned. My family’s reputation will be ruined if my father’s debts are made known on the streets, but I see no other answer. I will tell your father the truth. I’ll explain that our engagement is broken, and that I cannot repay the dowry until I have sold my assets in America.”
Once again she placed her hand over his heart and leaned close to him so that she could look directly into his eyes. “I won’t do this again.”
“That I believe, but what game will you come up with next? I can’t carry this charade off any longer.” His voice softened even more. He raked the backs of his fingers down her cheek. “You are successfully driving me insane.”
Mirabella didn’t know how, but she knew he was referring to more than just peace of mind. She felt the drain on her senses. In the darkness their eyes searched. Each waited for the other to speak.
The carriage stopped but neither moved. Mirabella heard the driver jump down. He popped open the door and stared at them for a moment. Suddenly she realized he saw two men sitting very close together with one man’s arm on the other’s chest. Camden must have realized how they must have looked to the driver at the moment she did for they both jumped up at the same time.
Camden stepped out and paid the driver while she climbed down. Thank goodness they were not right in front of her house.
As soon as Camden turned from the driver, he said, “Let’s go.”
He started walking. Was he really going to wake her father? His strides were long and purposeful, spurring Mirabella to action. She took off after him.
“No, wait,” she murmured softly. Camden kept walking, nearing her house, nearing her front door. Anguish filled her. She started running. “No, Camden. Wait. Please, let us go to the back.”
She took hold of his arm, and he allowed her to guide him through the iron gate to the back of the house where they stopped not far from the back steps. Under a shadowed sky with very little light, she stood close to Camden and felt the pull of her attraction to him.
She had no choice. She had to trust he would understand what she had done and why. She waited a long time before she said, “I had to get inside the club. I had to kiss the young gentlemen,” she said in a whispered voice. “I’m trying to find a killer.”
“A what?” He gave her a questioning look.
“A killer.”
“Mirabella, are you in danger?” His tone became anxious.
“No, not me.” She paused. “But other unsuspecting young ladies might be.”
He stepped closer to her. “Tell me what you are talking about. I’ve read nothing in the papers about a killer on the loose.”
A breeze raked across her face and cooled her heated skin. Now that she had started her story, she was desperate to tell him everything. “I’m trying to find the man responsible for Sarah’s death.”
“Your aunt’s ward? I thought you told me she died in her sleep.”
“She did, but a man with no honor caused her death.”
Camden laid gentle hands on her shoulders. “Mirabella, I’m finding it difficult to follow you. Start at the beginning, not the end.”
“It’s a long, complicated story, my lord.” Mirabella suddenly felt weary.
“Talk fast or condense your story. The servants will be up soon, and I’m still not convinced that I shouldn’t speak to your father without delay.”
Mirabella looked up at the sky. The first light of dawn was streaking across the darkness. “Everyone in the house thought Sarah had died in her sleep. A few days later, I found Sarah’s diary.”
“And you read the diary?”
“Yes. I was lonely for Sarah. I missed her, and I thought reading her writings might comfort me. I assumed there w
ould be poetry and verse like I enjoy writing. Instead I read the most horrible story.”
“What? Tell it to me.”
Mirabella quickly told him the entire story of Sarah and her Prince Charming, ending it with how Sarah took an overdose of laudanum when she could see no honorable way out of her predicament.
“What did your father say when you told him this?” Camden asked.
“I never told him or the authorities. I was afraid they wouldn’t do anything about it. And if they somehow let it slip that they were looking for a man with a scar it would give the vile man time to leave town and never be punished for what he did.”
“What scar?”
“The scar on Prince Charming’s neck. I told you it was complicated.”
“I agree. Tell me, what has any of this to do with you allowing men to kiss you or posing as a man?”
“Shh.” She put a finger to her lips. “You must not speak so loudly. I devised a plan to find Prince Charming myself. When I do, I will let it be known to certain ladies of the ton that he got Sarah with child and then wouldn’t do the right thing and marry her. When they get through with him, he will not be welcomed in anyone’s home again.”
“It’s true that most pushy mamas hide their daughters from known rakes and scoundrels. But how did you think you could begin to find the lecher?”
“I knew certain things from the diary. Sarah danced with him last Season. He is shorter than most men, and he has a wide raised scar on his neck, right about here.” She pointed to the area just above her collarbone. “I made a list of suspects from her dance cards who fit that description.”
“Mirabella, that must be half the eligible men in London.”
“Of course not. You see, because Sarah wasn’t very pretty, and she had a droopy eye. She only had a few opportunities. Occasionally some mama would feel sorry for her and force her son to ask Sarah to dance. So there weren’t that many names on her cards.”
“I’m still missing the part about how your schemes of kissing and dressing as a man fit into this story.”
“I have to find the man with the scar.”
“How the devil did you think you’d see that since it’s under a man’s clothes?”
“That, of course, was the problem. So I devised a plan to allow the gentlemen on my list to take me into the gardens and kiss me so that I might put my little finger down their neckcloths and search for the scar.”
He shook his head in disbelief. “Mirabella.”
“No, Camden. It was really quite simple once I learned how to do it quickly.”
“Damnation! Simple indeed,” he said harshly. “How many men did it take you to learn how?”
“Oh, I learned how to do it on my maid. I had her dress in a shirt and cravat so I could become skilled at it and do it quickly. I didn’t want to spend too much time with the gentlemen.”
Camden ran both his hands through his hair and expelled a loud sigh. “You overwhelm me, Mirabella. You let young men take you into gardens and kiss you just so you could feel their necks for a scar?”
“Yes, but I haven’t done it since you returned.”
He nodded. “So this is why you are dressed as a man tonight.”
“Yes. It was really quite easy to see a man’s neck when he’s not wearing a collar or cravat. I didn’t realize that so few of them relax enough to take them off. But tonight was much preferable to the kissing.”
“What you did was madness.” He turned away from her.
“No, Camden. I don’t believe that.” She took hold of his arm and forced him to look at her. “I want you to know I meant it when I told you that no other man’s kisses made me feel the way yours do. And I found no pleasure in what I did tonight, either.”
In the darkness he placed the tips of his fingers under her chin and moved his face closer to hers. “How many men have you kissed?”
His question wounded her, and she remained silent.
“Just tell me was it more than two? More than five? More than ten?”
No matter what she said, he could not think worse of her than he already did. “It was more than one.”
“Which was more than enough to change our destiny.” He took a deep breath and backed away from her one step. “Is that why you asked all those questions about my brother’s birthmarks and scars?”
“Yes.”
She expected him to be more furious than he was. She wouldn’t have blamed him. Mirabella reached up and untied her neckcloth and placed it in her jacket pocket.
“You suspected my brother had left a lover to take care of herself?”
“Truly, I have not suspected anyone specifically, and Hudson’s name wasn’t listed on Sarah’s dance cards. But I noticed he had some kind of marking on his neck and naturally I was curious as to what it was and how it got there.”
The anger seemed to have left his voice when he said, “Not a scar, a scratch. That is very recent, I might add.”
“I was sure that would be the case.”
“There are better ways to handle this.”
“None that I could think of that wouldn’t send the miscreant into hiding.”
His gaze swept down her face and then back up to her eyes. “I’m relieved that you were not attracted to the gentlemen you kissed, but still you flaunt convention with reckless disregard.”
Mirabella waited with hope that he might say more. She wanted to hear him say her story changed everything between them and that her past didn’t matter, but he didn’t.
“Sarah was unable to help herself. I don’t know why she didn’t confide in me, or why she thought my father would throw her out on the street. He wouldn’t have. I know how high a price I have paid, and I am truly sorry for the trouble this has caused you. But I would do it again. I will continue until I find him.”
“No, Mirabella.” His tone was firm.
“Camden, I must, before he ruins some other young lady who has poor chances of making a match and is desperate for someone to love her.”
“You should have just asked everyone to bare their shoulders and been done with it.”
“Bare their shoulders?” An inspiration flashed through Mirabella’s mind so quickly she gasped. “Bare their shoulders,” she whispered again as the idea blossomed. “Yes. Oh my, Camden, I think you have something there.”
“Mirabella, I don’t know what you are thinking, but do not even think about doing it. You have done quite enough. Kissing men, dressing as a man was more than enough. I don’t believe I want to know what else you have done.”
Slightly embarrassed, she looked away from him.
He placed his fingertips under her chin and lightly pulled her face back to him. “What else have you done?”
“Nothing where anyone recognized me.”
“You dressed as a man before tonight?”
“No. A maid.”
“A servant! Blast it, Mirabella. I can see it’s dangerous to leave you alone.”
“I hated every moment of it and wouldn’t think of doing it again. It was truly dreadful. But, Camden, your idea is a perfect way to find him. If only I had thought of it before now. I love it.”
Mirabella threw her arms around his neck and kissed him on the lips. A long, hard kiss that took him only a second to return. His hands settled firmly on her waist and drew her close to him.
She was reluctant but finally broke away from the kiss and looked into his eyes. Shyly she said, “Thank you.”
“That was very enthusiastic gratitude. I don’t know what notion I put into your head, but don’t even think about it. This must stop. Enough games.”
“No, my lord. One more. This will do it. I know it. I’ll give a masked ball and invite everyone I can think of. No one will be allowed inside unless they wear a toga with the right shoulder bare.”
“A toga party? Mirabella, this is outrageous. I don’t see how you can pull off a big party. Where will you hold such a large undertaking? Ladies plan all year for these lavish events.�
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“I don’t know where or how. I only know I can do it. I’ll pay for the Great Hall, or I’ll hold it in Hyde Park if I have to. I will stand at the entrance and greet everyone who enters and send them away if they are not properly attired.”
“I believe you would do just that.”
“I will. Camden, I know it will work. Everyone in the ton loves a masked ball. If that young dandy is still in Town, I will find him.”
She reached up and kissed him again. This time it was a slower, softer kiss that lingered, filling her with those wonderful sensations that only Camden could make her feel. She slid her arms around his neck and pulled him to her.
The kiss deepened and quickly turned desperate as he captured her lips with his and wouldn’t let go. His tongue explored inside her mouth with accuracy, knowing just how to bring her the utmost pleasure.
“I have no willpower against you, Mirabella,” he whispered against her lips.
“I have none against you, dear Camden. Do not resist me. No kisses have ever made me feel the way yours do. No touch has ever thrilled me like your touch.”
“If you don’t want this, Mirabella, you must stop me.”
“Why would I not want this pleasure, my lord?”
“Why not indeed,” he murmured hoarsely and pulled her into the dark shadows near the side of the house.
Camden’s arms slid around her waist, his hands slid beneath her coat and up and down her back, caressing her as his lips moved hungrily over hers. He slipped his hands lower and flattened each wide palm on her buttocks and jammed her up against the bulge in his trousers. His pelvic area started a rhythmic motion against her softness. Mirabella thrilled to this new feeling and wanted to get closer to him, so she pressed into his movements.
There was an urgency inside her that she didn’t understand. All she knew was that she didn’t want him to stop. She matched him kiss for kiss, touch for touch and movement for movement.
To hell with the other men Mirabella had kissed. She wasn’t just being a flirt or in love as he had heard was the case with Hortense. Mirabella was trying to avenge a friend and save other young ladies from Sarah’s fate. That was an honorable thing for her to do.