by Alana Khan
I’m so focused on what I’m doing, I think Sextus has called my name three, maybe four times before his words register.
“Stop Lexa. Stop!”
I finally pause and look around. Sextus pries the knife out of my hands. He stomps on Khour’s right wrist so hard I hear bones snapping, then kicks the scalpel out of Khour’s reach.
It looks like I sliced the purple asshole about ten times. That and Sextus crushing every bone in Khour’s right hand made him fade out of consciousness.
Glancing behind me, I see two dead roaches on the floor, both their heads severed from their bodies.
The three Ceruleans are looking at me warmly, like I’m their long-lost cousin.
“I don’t understand,” I say, waiting for them to decapitate me.
“I’m Bastien,” one of them says, “Sextus’s cousin. I was conscripted fifteen years ago by that drackhole. He began paying me a few years ago, but I was still forbidden to leave. He was stupid enough to think he had my loyalty. I got my two friends to help me with this assignment.”
“Elvio,” says another as he nods to me. “We killed the Frains and released Sextus from that dracking chair.”
“Aquilo,” the third introduces himself.
The roach’s blood smells so bad I’m trying not to gag as I survey the room and try to absorb everything.
“You’re bleeding,” Bastien informs me. “Here.” He tears some cloth from the hem of his shirt and wraps it tightly around my forearm to stem the flow.
“Hey, Lexa,” Sex flashes me a full-on Johnny Depp pirate smile. “You’ve met my cousin? His friends? We weren’t sure we’d get this far, so our plan wasn’t crystal clear. Give me a moment. I’ve waited a long time for this. I’d like to draw it out, but I know we need to hurry.”
Sex throws a glass of water on Khour who sputters back to consciousness. He squats down next to the evil male and says, “I’m glad you remember me...and my sister Septima Alanis Auranious. I’ve waited a long time for this day. My only regret is I don’t have enough time to make you pay the full price for the pain you’ve caused so many people.”
Sextus grabs the scalpel from where he kicked it. I know his fondest wish was to kill the male slowly, and to tell the truth, it’s my fondest wish, too. Unfortunately, we’re kind of in a hurry, so Sex puts all his weight on his knee on Khour’s chest, then takes only a minute to carve what I assume are his initials into Khour’s forehead and cheek.
I’m not in Kansas anymore, Toto, because the Lexa who left Earth would have never taken great pleasure in anyone’s screams of pain. But this Lexa would be happy to listen to the symphony of Khour’s torment for hours.
Khour is still hanging onto life, moaning and begging. Sextus strides over to one of the dead roaches, cuts open its thorax, and dips his knife into one of its internal organs. He loads it with what I assume is their viscous sputum-colored acid, then stalks back to Khour.
Sextus
“I’m going to use this to kill you, you drack— “
“Sex,” Bastien interrupts, “in-house comms show a cadre of twelve males is hurrying here now. Someone pulled an alarm.”
I flick the caustic contents of the knife onto Khour’s face, grab Lexa’s arm and speak into my comm to the ship. “Morsus, immediately beam five closest vertical beings aboard.”
We’re all aboard the ship within one modicum. After immediately blasting into open air, we kick into hyperspace without further incident.
I’m the only one with piloting experience, so I take evasive maneuvers. I’ll perform touch-and-goes from one sector to another until no one could follow our trail.
After making certain Lexa has a clean bandage on her arm, I turn my attention back to the control panel.
“I know all you males want to go back to Ceruleous directly, but I’m plotting a course to Numa.” I continue entering instructions into the computer while Bastien treats my wounds. “Numa’s a drackhole with little Federation presence. We can hide there, contact friends and family back home, and make plans in relative safety before we return to our home planet.”
I want to have a moment alone to speak with Lexa, to comfort her. I’ll find out what happened to her beautiful face and then kiss it as if it’s the most precious commodity in the galaxy, because it is.
Replaying the last few moments in that torture chamber, I realize that every belief I’ve held dear for the last twenty annums just vanished.
For two decades I thought killing Khour was my life’s mission—that avenging Septi was the most important thing in the universe. But when I had to make an immediate decision, it was Lexa’s life that was most important. Killing Khour, taking revenge, became insignificant compared to keeping my Lexa safe.
I tear my eyes from the display screen to glance at her. She’s hugging her arms around her waist, her eyes large and luminous with tears.
“You’re safe, little Lexa. I promise to keep you that way.”
Turning back to the control panel, I type in another set of coordinates. If Lexa hadn’t been there, I would have risked my life, maybe even the lives of my comrades to take the extra moments to kill Khour. But for Lexa, I didn’t hesitate to trade my desire for revenge for her safety.
It hits me like a thunderbolt. I love my little Earther.
Lexa
The tiny bunk Sextus pulls me into reminds me of the sleeper area in Uncle Willy’s 18-wheeler. It’s basically a thin mattress on a platform smaller than a twin bed. It’s separated from the rest of the crew by a curtain that doesn’t quite stretch from one end of the opening to the other.
I don’t care, because Sextus lies down with his back to the far edge, and pulls me close to him, nestling my back to his front and squeezing me so tight it steals my breath.
I flip over, wanting to see his handsome face. I bracket my palms against his cheeks, petting him and tracing the cobalt whorls on his temple.
“Sex,” I say between dozens of kisses. “I thought I’d killed you. I lured you to Ortheon, then lost your life in a klempto game. I’m such an idiot—” He silences me with kisses of his own.
“You’re alive, pretty Lexa. I’m alive. And that motherdracker Khour is in a lot of pain, marked for life. The Frain acid ate those initials deep into his skin; it will serve as a constant reminder. Tell me why this shouldn’t be the happiest day of our lives.”
“Your thighs?”
“Bastien administered a healthy dose of painkiller. I’m fine, are you?”
“Great. You’re right. We made it out alive! We all did. Even your cousin and the others.” I kiss him again. This time it’s not a quick, urgent kiss, but a slow, meaningful one. “I just have one...concern.”
He stiffens, preparing himself for bad news.
I shake my head. “You didn’t kill Khour. Are you going to pursue him again? Risk your life to kill him?”
I almost lost him today. I don’t think I could live through this a second time.
“They say a brush with death will change a person. My priorities changed a few hoaras ago. You’ve moved to the top of the list, Lexa.”
He smiles at me, feathers his fingers through my hair, and presses his lips to my forehead.
“It sounds like your plans changed as well,” he says. “No quiet life in that house in the country on Salute. Those drackers burned it to the ground. I pulled satellite pictures off the Intergalactic Database. You don’t want to see them. It will break your heart.”
I smile and want to dive into his teal blue eyes. How did I ever think his gaze was icy and cold? He’s looking at me with so much warmth right now I’m getting positively hot.
“I never wanted to live there, Sex. I think you know that. I wanted to be with you, but I knew I couldn’t have you. Whoops, should I have said that? Should I have divulged the secret that I’m crazy about you and would follow you to the ends of the galaxy if you’d have me?”
“Are you getting the failing sickness, Lexa? Did you forget that as you walked down the r
amp of the Tranquility you told me you loved me? I don’t think you can call it a secret after it’s been revealed.” He’s so handsome when he smiles.
He pets my hair and kisses my forehead. “Sounds like we have lots of choices, Lexa. Many places to live. But there’s one thing I want. On Ceruleous, when two people make a commitment, we have a bonding ceremony. It’s a serious pledge. It means no other males for you, ever. No females for me. Just the two of us. Forever. Think about it.
“I never thought I’d have a mate or a family. I always knew the terminal point of my life would be when I killed Khour and avenged Septi. All that changed today. And how fortunate that I’ve already met the female I’d like to share the rest of my life with.”
The old Lexa would have tossed him some ridiculous line or made a joke. But right now I just want to squeeze him and kiss him so hard he’ll remember it forever.
“I love you, Sex. We haven’t known each other long, but I don’t need to think about it. You’re a male of character. I’d be lucky to share the rest of my life with you.”
Chapter Fifteen
Lexa
It took us three days to get to Numa. We zigzagged across the known universe to get here in an attempt to confuse anyone on our trail. It’s been three very long days of sleeping cuddled together in that tiny bunk with three other guys able to hear every whisper through the barely there curtain that separates us from them.
They all clapped and cheered when I accepted Sex’s proposal. They weren’t even mildly repentant about eavesdropping on our private conversation.
Thus, even though I’ve been able to think of nothing but sex, we haven’t done more than kiss in the past seventy-two hours. Well, kiss and talk dirty. I put my lips next to his ear and tell him every sexy thing I can imagine doing to his body. Then he moves his mouth close to me and blows me away with his imagination. It turns out the little knife maneuver he used in the blue room at my house was a very pale example of his bedroom creativity. I’ve been dripping wet for days.
“We dock in less than an hoara, Lexa.” Leaning over, he whispers, “I’ll find the nicest hotel room on the entire dracking planet. Those sensitive toes of yours won’t even mind walking on the carpet. Although they won’t have to, because I’m not going to let you out of my bed.”
“I hope you have money. Mine burned up on Salute.”
“I secretly contacted my cousin Bastien on my way to rescue you. We had a plan, albeit a very flimsy one. He pocketed some of Khour’s expensive little baubles before we left atmo. We’ll sell them and be fine for credits. We can afford the best Numa can offer. Although,” he gives me a serious look, “Numa’s best isn’t too many notches above what you called the ‘roach motel’ on Lusion.” He cups my breast and smiles, “Ahh, I miss those days. You looked so cute in your halftique.”
I slap his hand away. I know he’s joking, but my libido’s tuned so high that just his light touch makes me want to impale myself on him. We can’t get to that hotel soon enough.
~.~
Four hours later we’ve fenced Khour’s gold and jewelry trinkets and each of us is in a room in Numa’s version of the Hilton. It’s ten steps up from the dives I stayed in as a kid.
Sextus reassured me we could go as fast or slow as I wanted. I’m so ready for what will happen in that bed, I can’t even fathom the idea of not consummating the deal tonight. I’m ready—more than ready.
But, I must admit I’m a bit shy as I enter the bathroom to take a shower before coming to him in our bed. I shuck Sex’s huge shirt I’ve been wearing since Ortheon and enjoy the warm, steamy shower.
I luxuriate while drying myself with a fluffy, white towel, then twist my hair up in another. There were no mirrors on board the little Morsus, so I haven’t gotten a look at myself since Ortheon. I wipe the condensation from the mirror with my forearm and lean in, certain that the gash from my acid bath must have healed itself.
I’ve kept my hand from exploring it. I told myself it needed to heal and “not to pick” like Uncle Willy used to scold me. Surely the sweet, lovely, melty look in Sex’s eyes was all the affirmation I needed to tell me my cheek looked fine.
But no. The loving look in Sex’s eyes did not prepare me for this. The last time I looked in the mirror I believed I would heal. What I see now is...So. Fucking. Ugly.
Ugly. That’s the only word that fits. The crimson gash is wide and deep and...brings tears to my eyes.
Dear God in heaven, how could anyone look at me and not be repelled? I turn to the right and see my unblemished left cheek. I certainly never considered myself a beauty, but the view from this angle looks great in comparison. I turn to the left and force myself to memorize every jagged edge and scarlet pucker.
How is it Six and the other guys haven’t said a word over the last three days? I didn’t catch a flicker of revulsion. Not once did any of their eyes skitter from my face. Ceruleans must be the nicest males in the galaxy. No one else could have gazed upon me and not made a comment.
“Pet,” Sex calls from the other room. “Have you started without me in there?”
I’m paralyzed. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what to do. What I do know is that I’m not leaving the safety of this bathroom.
I plop onto the toilet seat and breathe. Where’s your Radical Acceptance skill now, Lexa? I ask myself. How the fuck do you accept being disfigured for life?
“Lexa, I’m not a monster. If you’re not ready for intercourse we’ll just cuddle,” he calls through the door.
No, he’s not the monster, I am. Elsa Lancaster, the Bride of Frankenstein, looked a helluva lot better than me.
He knocks one knuckle on the door. “Seriously, talk to me. If you want, I can get myself another room.” He jiggles the doorknob; I’m not sure why I locked it, but I’m glad I did. “Make a noise, Lexa, so I know you didn’t fall and pass out in the shower. Otherwise, I’m going to break down this door.”
Panic. I don’t know what to say. “Noise,” is my brilliant reply.
“I’ve done something. I’m sorry. It was my improper proposition on the Tranquility. Was it carving initials into Khour’s face? You must think I’m incapable of being kind and tender. I’m not a good male. How could you possibly want to be with me when I’m such a dracker? Look, I’ll get another room. I’ll give you space.”
Somehow, his self-recriminations galvanize me out of my paralysis. “Don’t go.” I know I should stand up and open the door and have an actual conversation with him. Skills, Lexa, skills. I take a breath. Okay, feel the fear and do it anyway. That skill isn’t easy.
It’s like I just dropped into a new body. I have to order each individual muscle to move as I stand, tuck a towel around myself, and walk to the door. As I unlock it, I hear Sextus’s soft, “Thank the Gods,” mumbled under his breath.
I can’t bear to even glance at his face—that would be too hard. I sit at the little table in the corner, and he immediately joins me. His brow is furrowed, his blue eyes are full of concern. “What have I done, Lexa? I wish I was a perfect male for you, but I’m not.”
A bark of astonished laughter escapes my lips. He’s worried about being perfect?
“The elephant in the room here isn’t your imperfections, Six, it’s mine.”
His handsome face is clueless.
I point one finger at my cheek.
His jaw drops, then a smile dawns on his features. “That? You’re hiding from me because of that? It makes you look so...tough, so fierce. All I see when I notice it is my mental picture of that disgusting Frain incing toward you with its tongue dripping with venom and you standing firm like the tenacious fighter you are.
“On my planet, we’d say you have balls, even though you’re a female. You make me so proud. You wear a badge of honor. It proves you went through something difficult and horrific and lived to tell about it. I can be dense; I didn’t realize it would bother you.”
“It doesn’t look...ugly to you?”
He studie
s me as if he’s looking at a diamond trying to find a flaw. “On someone else it might look ugly. On you? It just looks sexy.”
The motherfucker isn’t lying. I can tell by his expression. He thinks my scar is hot. I can’t help but giggle. I guess every pirate needs a scar—Sextus certainly doesn’t seem to mind it.
“If you want it fixed, we can see a doctor tomorrow, little Lexa.”
“We can? Doctors can fix this?”
“Of course.”
Well, I guess if they’ve discovered hyperspace and interstellar travel and advanced ways to laser people to death, they must have made breakthroughs in healing and medicine.
I “accidentally” let my towel drop half an inch and lean toward him. “You really think I’m sexy?”