by Sarah Curtis
Sadie shook her head.
“I think you’re grasping at straws, looking for an excuse to end things with him so he won’t hurt you again.”
“I’m not doing—”
“You are. And as much as it pains me to admit it, Dean’s one of the good guys. You said so yourself. So stop thinking so damn much and just enjoy the ride.”
“You don’t think I’m making a mistake if I forgive him?”
“No. The mistake would be walking away and ruining your chance at happiness.”
Maggie was the third person to say as much, and Sadie was now positive she was being too stubborn. Was what Dean had done really that bad? Was she making a mountain out of a molehill? Was she using the fact he didn’t tell her—even though he’d made it clear people’s lives could be in danger if he had—as an excuse to stay mad instead of just building a bridge and getting over it? He apologized—sincerely—more than once.
She thought about what Maggie had said. Was she right? Was she afraid and purposely trying to sabotage things now that Dean was getting serious?
He’d set the limits on their relationship, and she had never pushed for more—never asked him why they weren’t taking the next step. Was it because she was secretly afraid if she lost Dean she’d end up like her mom, devastated to a crippling point over losing the love of her life?
Realization dawned like a slap to the forehead. Sure, Dean had hidden things from her, but she was as much to blame. If she had really wanted their relationship to work, she would have known something was off and pushed Dean until he broke—or their relationship did. Instead, she skirted around big issues and kept her head buried in the sand with the mentality she’d enjoy it while it lasted.
She loved Dean. She wasn’t going to spend the rest of her life living in fear. She did deserve happiness.
A knock sounded on the door, and Sadie jumped up. “That’s him. How do I look?” It had been drizzling on and off all morning, so she wasn’t sure if Dean still planned to go to the beach. Just in case, she chose to wear an older pair of jeans but paired them with a cute, rhinestone hoodie and matching sparkly flip-flops.
“You really must be nervous if you care what you look like.”
Sadie picked up a throw pillow from the couch and tossed it, hitting Maggie in the arm. “Did you just call me a slob?”
Maggie held up her hands. “I think this is the point in the courtroom drama where the defendant pleads the fifth.”
Sadie chuckled but another knock had her losing her smile.
“Do you want me to get it?” Maggie asked, turning serious, too. “I can send him away—or try to,” she mumbled under her breath, “if you’re still deciding what you want to do.”
“No. I’ve made my decision. That’s why I’m so nervous.” Sadie hurried to the door and opened it before Dean could knock again.
He stood before her, back in casual attire—boots, worn jeans, solid black tee—he looked like her Dean, and for some strange reason that made her feel more confident about her decision. Her nerves vanished like a puff of smoke.
His gaze was scorching as it scanned her, stopping for a moment on her toes surrounded in so much glitter before working its way back up to rest on her face. “You look beautiful.”
“I’ve been told by someone I won’t name, that’s not true.”
“I never said that!” Maggie’s disembodied voice floated to the door. “You can be beautiful and a slob.”
Dean’s eyes narrowed before darting over her shoulder. “Maggie’s in true form again, I see.”
Worried a battle would brew, Sadie took Dean’s arm, nabbed her purse off the rack, and pushed them out the door, calling over her shoulder, “Be sure to lock up when you leave. I’m not sure what time I’ll be home.” As a fitness instructor at a local gym, Maggie’s work hours were even more bizarre than her own.
“Will do! Have fun.”
Sadie slammed the door, putting a stop to Maggie’s words, worried about what she might say next.
Dean exchanged her grip on his arm for his hand, entwining their fingers.
Once they reached the bottom of the stairs, Sadie examined the sky. It wasn’t raining but ominous black clouds hung low, threatening to do just that. “Are we still going to the beach?”
Dean shook his head. “Don’t want to chance our picnic getting wet.” He opened the passenger-side door. “Got a different plan.”
As he helped her into the car, she asked, “We’re having a picnic?”
Dean waited until he got in and was buckled up before answering. “Changed it to what my granny used to call a rainy day picnic.”
Sadie smiled. “You’ve never mentioned your granny before.”
The engine roared as Dean started the car. “My dad’s mom. She passed when I was fourteen.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m just happy I got to know her at all. She was a great lady.”
Wanting to change the mood in the car to something more upbeat, she asked, “So what’s a rainy day picnic?”
A smile transformed his profile. “You’ll see.”
And she did—ten minutes later. They pulled up in front of Dean’s apartment, and he helped her out of the car. A drizzle had started to fall and after slamming the car door, he scooped her up and moved quickly down the path to the overhang that covered his front door.
“I lost my flip-flop,” Sadie laughed as she clutched Dean’s neck holding on for dear life.
He placed her on her feet and ran back out into the rain to retrieve it. He returned a few seconds later and got to one knee, taking her foot in his hand to slide her shoe back on.
“I feel like Cinderella.”
“I’m a far cry from Prince Charming.” He got back to his feet and put the key in the lock to open the door.
“I don’t know. There’ve been times you’ve been pretty gallant.” Sadie stepped through the door.
Like now, she thought as she scanned the living room. Twinkle lights were draped everywhere, making the otherwise gloomy room glow like a fairy forest. All the furniture had been pushed against the walls, leaving a space where a large, puffy quilt lay on the floor and in the center of that was a wicker basket, a bucket of ice holding a bottle of champagne, and two flutes.
“Wow,” was all she could articulate as she stepped farther into the room.
“Rainy day picnic.” Dean took her hand and led her to the blanket.
She kicked off her shoes and sat down, crossing her legs. Dean sat across from her, and his expression turned more serious than she’d ever seen it. “Before we eat, there’s something I want to say.”
She nodded for him to continue, but she did so with an anxious lump in her stomach, wondering what he would say.
“From the first moment I saw you, the course of my life changed. I knew in that second, I would do anything to make you mine.
“Yeah, the timing had been shit. I knew when the truth came out there was a possibility you would hate me. But that didn’t stop me. Nothing could’ve stopped me from making you mine. And I don’t regret it—not one single second of my time with you. But I do regret lying to you—deceiving you into thinking I was someone I’m not. And for that, Sadie, I’m sorry.
“I might not have been able to tell you certain things, but I tried to show you every damn day how much I love you. I only hope that’s enough for you to forgive me.”
Sadie looked around the room—at the effort Dean had put in to making it special. “I saw. I saw all the things you did.” She waved a hand. “What you’re still doing. But more than that, I felt it, too.”
Heart pounding with butterflies in her stomach, she decided to take a leap and hoped like hell Dean would be there to catch her. “I don’t want to regret losing you.”
“What exactly are you saying?”
She took a deep breath. If he was willing to lay his feelings on the line than he deserved the same from her. “Yo
u’re not the only one who lied in this relationship. I was lying to myself. I knew something was a little off, but I didn’t act on those feelings because of where it would lead. Deep down, I think I was afraid of losing you, and if I didn’t let you get too close, you couldn’t hurt me.
“So, what I’m saying is, I forgive you because I was pretending, too. I thought if I didn’t ask you the hard questions then our relationship couldn’t be that serious. But my plan backfired because I ended up loving you anyway.”
His hand was warm and strong as he entwined his fingers with hers and brought their clasped hands to his lips. He closed his eyes and reverently placed a gentle kiss on her knuckles. When he opened his eyes, the spark that’d been missing for the past few days was back.
With a forceful kick, he knocked the basket aside, reached over for her, and hauled her into his lap. His eyes were penetrating, staring into her own as he declared in a gruff voice, “I love you, Sadie.”
His face was so close, she could count his eyelashes, and his lips were right there. Desperate for him to kiss her, she held her breath.
He didn’t disappoint.
His lips crashed down on hers.
Chapter Sixteen
Dean
Sadie’s lips, inches away, were too tempting. Dean captured them. Slid his tongue in.
Claiming.
Devouring.
It felt like forever since he last had her mouth.
It also felt like fucking heaven.
Her hand traveled to the back of his head, her fingers spearing his hair and grazing his scalp. It sent a tremor down his spine straight to his dick.
He groaned.
His hand moved over her hip, under the layers of her sweatshirt and tee, finding bare skin. It was warm and smooth and silky soft—tactile bliss for his fingertips.
She moaned.
Her ass in his lap, his hand up her shirt inches away from her magnificent tits, his mouth fused with hers, it was too much. He’d been wanting her for so long. His dick was on sensory overload.
Ripping his mouth from hers, he panted, “Fuck, Sadie, if we don’t stop now, I’m not sure I’ll be able to.”
“Then don’t.” Her eyes were at half-mast, cheeks flushed, and her glossy lips parted and shining in the reflection of the twinkle lights.
Fuck, she was beautiful.
“Be certain, Sadie. There’s no going back from this. Once I make you mine, you’re mine. I’ll never let you go.”
Her fingers traced a path over his jaw, lingering to play with the days’ worth of stubble he hadn’t bothered to shave off that morning. “I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life.”
With a low growl, he dipped them, Sadie’s back coming to rest on the quilt with him hovering over her. “I promise to make you the happiest woman alive.”
Her hand trailed up his arm to his shoulder. Tenderness entered her eyes. “You already have.”
A lightness filled his chest as he took a deep breath and planted his mouth on hers. She opened for him. Willingly. Greedily. And he took advantage, his tongue invading, his fingers diving into her hair and angling her head so he could deepen the kiss. Time lost all meaning as he savored the perfection he was feasting on.
She moaned again, and his dick jumped, impatient to come out and play, but he ignored it, not wanting to rush. He had one first time with Sadie, and he needed to make it perfect for her.
As perfect as it already was for him.
He sat up, losing her mouth, and straddled her hips. His fingers went for the zipper on her sweatshirt and slowly pulled it down. It parted, revealing the top underneath, the collar dipping low and exposing the swells of her breasts. Another vision too tempting to pass up.
His lips found the creamy, smooth skin, skimming over it as he breathed in her scent—roses and something distinctly Sadie. Something that had his mouth watering and left his dick throbbing. He tasted her—just as sweet as she smelled.
She strained under his touch, and he brought his hands under the hem of her shirt. “Arch your back for me.”
She did, thrusting her tits out, and he slid her shirt up, exposing her lace and satin bra. He groaned, his hands coming up to cup the full mounds, kneading and shaping them to fit his palms.
He licked between her cleavage, and the skin right along the edge of the lace. It wasn’t enough. And from the noises Sadie was making, it wasn’t enough for her either.
He sat up, taking her with him. She was faster than him, pulling her sweatshirt off and tossing it to the side.
“Lift your arms.” He pulled the tank over her head and tossed it with her sweatshirt.
His hands went to her back, finding the clasp of her bra and flicking it. It dipped low in front, exposing more of her breasts as one strap fell down her shoulder. She shrugged it the rest of the way off and that pushed him over the edge. Pressing her onto her back, he followed her down, his mouth latching on to a nipple and sucking.
Her fingers dove into his hair, holding him in place, but he wasn’t going anywhere. She tasted too damn good. He flicked her nipple with his tongue, circled it, and flicked it again before moving to her other breast to start the process anew.
He could spend a lifetime doing just that, but Sadie was getting antsy. He could tell from the sounds she was making and the way she wiggled her hips, wanting more. Begging for it.
He slowly moved down her torso, leaving a trail of kisses. When he reached her waistband, he popped the button on her jeans and slid the zipper down. Her skin was so soft right above her panty line. He nuzzled it with his lips as he yanked at her jeans, exposing more to his viewing pleasure.
She had a small tuft of silky, brown curls, but her pussy lips were bare, and God, he couldn’t wait to taste her. He pulled her pants and underwear the rest of the way off, settled between her thighs, and fulfilled a fantasy.
If he thought her mouth was heaven, her pussy was nirvana. Pushing her legs wider apart, he buried his face and ate her like she was his last meal. And if it were, he’d die a happy man.
His fingers found her, pushing in as his mouth latched onto her clit, sucking and tonguing it.
Her ass came off the floor, her body straining and arching to get closer. “Yes, right there.” Her thigh muscles clutched him, and her long moan filled the room as her body shuddered and went limp.
She was still panting by the time he nibbled his way back up her torso and buried his face in her neck. He needed a minute. His dick was throbbing so hard, he worried it might bust the zipper of his jeans.
Her hand rubbed up his back. “Why are you still dressed and I’m… not?”
He raised his head. She wore a sated smile, and he felt like the king of the world for putting it there. “Because if I hadn’t been fully clothed, I wouldn’t have had the willpower to make you come without sliding my cock inside you.”
Her foot glided over his leg, down and back up. “That would’ve been okay.”
“No, because now I get to make you come again.”
Her expression said she didn’t think that would happen, but that was okay. He’d be more than happy to prove it to her. His dick jumped, agreeing.
Sitting up, he grabbed the back of his tee and pulled it over his head. Then he stood, toeing off his boots and shucking his jeans, boxer briefs, and socks. Sadie stared the whole time, her eyes traveling over him as each piece was removed. He had to admit, her interested scrutiny felt fucking fantastic.
He did his own share of staring as she lay there watching him. But as tempting as her tits were, he found his eyes straying back to her face time and time again.
God, she was so fucking beautiful.
And all his.
Mine.
His caveman was clawing to the surface again. He didn’t have the patience Dean had. But it did spur him into action. Bending, he scooped Sadie up.
She squeaked and threw her arms around his neck. “Where are we going?”
“Bedroom. I’ll make a meal of you on the floor, but you’ll need padding for what I have in store for you next.”
She tipped her head back. “I don’t know whether to be scared or excited.”
He couldn’t hold back the grin, and he knew it looked cocky. “Excited, darlin’. Very excited.”
He felt her shiver, and her lids fell. She peered at him from under her lashes.
His cock jumped.
Fuck, she was killing him.
He placed her on the bed, planted a knee, and braced himself over her. “I know we’re supposed to have the talk.” At her quizzical expression, he continued, “I have a condom, and if you say so, I’ll use it, but I don’t like the thought of anything between us. I don’t ever want anything between us. I promise you, I’m clean. I’d never do anything to put you in danger.”
“It’s, um, been a while for me—not since college—so I’m clean, too. And I’m on the pill, so you don’t have to use a condom.”
He shoved the thought of Sadie having sex with someone other than him out of his head. That was something he never wanted to think about—especially when they were in bed together. Though he couldn’t stop the small measure of satisfaction he got from knowing it had been a few years since she’d been with anyone.
Mine.
Not able to wait a second longer, he planted himself between her legs and took her mouth. She wrapped her legs around him, her heels sinking into his ass as he sank himself home.
Home.
Yes, that was the right word.
And home felt fucking incredible.
He groaned. He’d never had sex without a condom, but he didn’t imagine there was that much of a difference. What he was feeling now was all Sadie and his love for her.
For the first time in his life, he was making love. Not fucking.
Their hands caressed, mouths kissed, licked, and sucked. Her tongue hit a spot right behind his ear, and he almost shot his load right then and there. But he held on, savoring because it felt too damn good to stop.
Felt too good for it to end.