Why does that feel so good?
Josh saw my reaction and then moved his hand so he touched my lips with his thumb, running it along my bottom lip. My own lips parted slightly and my tongue lightly touched his finger. Both our bodies leaned even closer towards one another as the sexual tension reached breaking point. There was no thinking, it was all bodily action as something we used to completely ignore in the past, became magnetized. It was like I was in some kind of erotic dream, but it was real and it was happening and it felt like there was nothing I could do to stop it.
Holy mother of fuck! What am I doing?
“I’d hate to interrupt this little moment...”
Both of our bodies flinched as Josh and I swung our heads back towards the front door where Melanie was lingering in the doorway, watching us. I let go of Josh’s T-shirt instantly and took three steps away from him. Melanie’s reappearance gave me a huge jolt out of the surreal dream I had slipped into.
“I forgot my purse,” Melanie said, eyeing me carefully. She walked back into the apartment and over to the sofa where her black clutch was sitting.
Josh walked over to Melanie and grabbed her elbow, showing her back out the door, for the second time. “OK, OK, Josh. Don’t get huffy!” Melanie sounded really pissed off as Josh eagerly helped her out once again.
I took a minute to compose my rational thoughts that had obviously left my body since I walked into this place. Were the months I had not seen Josh now just all coming to a head? I had no idea what was sitting under the surface of my skin. I was certain that my heart was now with Clint, but perhaps I was being ignorant about what else was going on inside me. There was a small tiny piece of paper back at our apartment that prevented me from giving my whole entire heart to Clint. That piece of paper had allowed doubt to grow, and had also allowed other thoughts and feelings to build inside me too. Feelings I was obviously ignoring or pretending were not there.
This was too dangerous now. I had to leave before I did something I would regret.
“Josh, I came here because I wanted to talk to you about something rather important, but now I don’t think it’s a good idea. I need to go. We’ll talk, uh, maybe later. OK. Sorry again for showing up like this. Next time I will call.” I looked at the floor as I spoke, avoiding Josh’s eyes. I didn’t want to look at them for fear I might not actually leave. Now that I was aware that there were some undetermined feelings that had been roused by Josh, I couldn’t be there a moment longer. It was way too risky.
“Norah...” Josh reached out to take my hand, but I sideswiped his touch and headed for the door, not looking back at Josh as I fled from his apartment and that unexpected moment that could have ended my relationship with Clint.
Stepping onto the sidewalk, I was suddenly hit with the worst possible thing. Guilt. So much guilt slapping my face and tearing me down. It then punched me where it hurt the most, my heart. I tried to hurry my legs and get back to my apartment as quickly as I could. I needed to try and remove these feelings. I needed to get some clarity and perspective about what just happened, and I needed to fix the fight Clint and I had that morning. I reached into my bag, grabbed my cell and dialed Clint’s number. He picked it up after two rings.
“Norah, I’m kind of busy. Everything OK?” I could tell he was still sore from our argument.
“Our apartment. Twenty minutes. It’s urgent.”
Chapter 4
Distractions
~ ~ ~
I needed to resolve these confused feelings and remove this sexual energy I had from seeing Josh. I cannot...no...I will not let this find a way into my heart and ruin this for me. It’s just sexual tension. Hardcore, animalistic, lick his body all over, sexual tension. That’s all it is. A normal reaction from our lifelong friendship and our strong emotional bond. It doesn’t mean anything. Right? RIGHT? It’s all because of that stupid kiss. That deep, heart-opening, body tingling, brain numbing kiss, that happened when I had broken up with Clint and Josh had taken care of me. And now that things were uncertain and strained with Clint, I was stupidly letting myself open up to making really dumb mistakes.
Stop Norah. Slow down. Just take a deep breath. Air goes in, air goes out.
When I got back to our apartment, I ran straight into my bedroom, stripped off all my clothes, and went to my lingerie drawer to retrieve my black satin La Perla thong and matching corset. I had recently purchased them with the intention of a very dirty night I had in mind with Clint, but now, it was the only thing I wanted to wear to help my present physical condition that was ready to erupt. I put on the thong and corset, fixing the corset’s clasps up at the front. As I shook my hair free from my messy bun I had tied up on my head, my ears pricked up at the sound of the front door opening.
“Norah, Norah! Are you here? Is everything OK?”
Clint’s panicked voice echoed through the apartment as I heard him close the front door. I strode out of the bedroom and hurried towards the door, determined with the kind of confused sexual fury you get when you are overwhelmed by a multitude of mixed emotion.
Clint’s eyes widened when he saw me walk towards him. They were filled with surprise, confusion and something else, desire. I could see it. He couldn’t hide it right now, even after our disagreement this morning.
“I, I, I...Ummm, are you...ah, what’s wrong?” Clint stammered, but his arms went up instinctively as I flung my body towards him.
“How dare you leave me so unsatisfied this morning! I want, no, I demand you make it up to me this instant.” I stomped my foot, and Clint’s mouth curled up at the corners. He loved it when I took control.
I could see him debate in his head. I knew he was probably still upset from this morning’s dispute. He could quite possibly get very angry with me right now. Clint’s eyes narrowed as he pulled me off him and he looked me up and down. I wasn’t quite sure how he was about to react, knowing I had just called him home to screw his brains out.
Secretly I needed to release all the tension I had built up from seeing Josh, but I figured this was would be like killing two birds with one stone. Getting rid of that sexual tension, and setting things right with Clint and our relationship.
A smile crept onto his lips. “My, Norah.”
Got him!
His mouth found mine immediately, his tongue going straight down my throat, but I wanted it like this. Hard, forceful and passionate. I wanted Clint to completely claim me and remind me there was absolutely no need to desire anyone else.
“Give it to me hard Clint,” I breathed into his ear.
“You will always be mine,” he said back to me, but there was something else in his voice that I couldn’t place as he said it, something different, but since it was the heat of the moment, I brushed it out of my mind. There was a lot I needed right now, and picking apart words for double meanings was not on the top of my list.
I pulled at his blond hair, twisting it into my fingers. “Prove it,” I challenged him, hoping to fuel him to get even more aggressive with me. I couldn’t explain how much I needed him to be ruthless. For a second, I thought about my painting and firing guns and how I used those outlets to steady my precarious darkness.
Was I now using sex as a replacement?
Clint’s voice became deep and rough. “Oh Norah, you don’t know how happy I am to hear you say that.” His words were fierce, his smile turning into a wicked grin. It was as if I approved of his stake on me, claiming my body in the most caveman-like way. I wanted to feel like his possession. Anything to distract my wandering heart from being diverted. Clint did not deserve that behavior from me this morning, and I wanted to make it up to him and our relationship.
“Damn you always get me so hard.” He began biting and sucking at my neck.
“That is exactly what I want to hear,” I panted back.
Clint moaned and then grabbed onto my naked rear, gripping hard and then lifting me up and around his waist. He backed us up towards the front door. My back hit hard against th
e wood and I let out a harsh cry, “Oh fuck, that hurt!” Clint stalled but I smiled, and breathed out, “And I want more.”
Clint’s eyes more than flamed as I said it. He tried to meet me in my hunger. “You want more. I will give you more!” His hands were gripping me tightly, his hardness against me making me wet, and all could do was moan at the sensation of his fingers digging harder and harder into my skin.
He stopped and stepped away, looking at me up and down once more. I was trying to catch my breath as I stayed leaning up against the wood. “I like this corset you have on. A lot.”
“Do you?” I smirked.
“Norah, you are the sexiest, most intoxicating and addictive girl I have ever known. I find myself craving you whenever you aren’t around, and when you are, all I want to do is be inside you because...”
“Because...?” I stepped forward towards him, anxious to get back to business.
Clint stepped towards me and gripped onto my shoulders. “You. Are. Mine.”
Normally such possessive words would irritate me, but given I welcomed this side of him, especially today, I rolled with what I needed to do most, and that was forget about the unexpected feelings I suddenly felt for Josh.
“Show me I’m yours then.”
His hand smoothed up my thigh and round to my backside, where he held me tightly again. I moaned at the strength of his grip. His hand then pulled at my thong, pulling it down my thighs. Clint dropped to his knees as he did. He purposely brushed his mouth past me as he lowered to his knees. The sensation of his lips lightly grazing my sensitive spot made me even wetter. I then grabbed his head and pushed his mouth towards me. He laughed a little at my forcefulness before going to work, pleasing me. I threw my head back as the pleasure between my legs made me more and more needy. I wanted more than this, needed to be connected to my boyfriend right now. Even with Clint on his knees, his tongue inside me, I was having images of Josh in his apartment in his jeans, his bare muscular chest, the way he touched my lips with his thumb...
“Get off your knees Clint. I want you in me right now!”
Clint obeyed and got up. He was smiling, even licking his lips and then he started to undo his shirt while at the same time I undid his pants and stripped him of his boxers. My mouth found his mouth as he stepped out of his clothing. I pushed him off me, and he stepped back, wide-eyed. His eyes were grinning. He knew what I wanted next. He walked up, grabbed my shoulders, and then shoved me hard against the door. I yelped at the pain of my back hitting the wood, but I relished it, and shuddered at how much I liked it. I grinned at Clint after the shock of hitting the door went through me. He walked up and lifted me on to his waist, sliding into me and then pushing me back against the door. His face was buried up near my left ear, breathing hard. I could tell he was trying to whisper words of something, love I think, but the desperation of wanting to be pounded, overtook me, and I forced my mouth over his so he understood that ‘talk time’ was over.
His rhythm was steady at first as we both banged up against the door, but as my moans increased, his thrusts intensified. My eyes began to roll back into my head in satisfaction. At this moment, nothing was pleasing me more, nothing was able to get into my head except Clint and the orgasm rapidly mounting from him being inside me.
“Tell me you’ll never leave me. Tell me that you are mine,” he finally got out, after I retreated from my attack on his mouth.
“Yes Clint, I’m yours. I’m yours. I’m yours. I’m yours!’ The wood against my back hurt in the last instance, I screamed, “I’m yours!”
We both groaned then, both finding our climax at the same time. My head rested, tilting upwards and back against the door, and Clint’s head was tilted forward, resting on my shoulder. His whole body shook, his chest heaving back and forth as he tried to slow his heart rate.
“Jesus Christ Norah. You are going to kill me.”
My head flopped forward so my chin fell lightly on top of Clint’s head. “But what a way to go.”
Clint shifted his head and moved it down so he could look at me seriously. “Your call scared me. Don’t do that again.” His arms wrapped around me tighter.
“Clint, I’m really sorry.” My apology was for more than just the call, but I couldn’t tell him that. I hugged him, feeling even more guilt for the way I acted with Josh this morning. I was a terrible girlfriend.
“You are forgiven, but I really have to get back to work.” He pressed his lips to mine. I closed my eyes as I relished in his soft and tender kiss.
Suddenly the door vibrated with knocking. Our bodies tensed with the realization that someone had been outside the door for an unknown period of time, listening to my moans, Clint’s grunts and the beating the wooden door had taken.
“Everything OK in there?” the familiar voice asked from the other side.
No. Fucking. Way!
“Shit it’s Josh,” Clint whispered, and lowered me on to the ground. We both scrambled to the bedroom. I quickly found some yoga pants and pulled them on. My fingers couldn’t seem to find the ability to unhook the clasps on my corset, so Clint tried to undo it for me, but after a few minutes of useless fumbling, I huffed in frustration and said, “Don’t worry about it. I’ll just throw my dressing gown over the top.”
Clint’s hands dropped to his side as I pulled out of his grip, and walked over to the ensuite where my gown was hanging.
As I quickly pulled it on, Clint fixed his own appearance, putting on some fresh work attire and making himself look presentable.
“What is he even doing here?” Clint asked, watching me as I tied the gown firmly around my waist.
“I went to see him this morning to talk, but he kind of, ummm, had company, and I left pretty quickly. He probably feels bad that we couldn’t talk, and that is why he’s just shown up like this.”
Clint pulled his tie back and forth adjusting it. “He had company?”
I pulled my disheveled sex-hair back into a bun. “Ah yeah, some blond bimbo. It was all very awkward. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough.”
We both now looked somewhat decent. I smiled at Clint and went to walk out of the bedroom when he caught me by the elbow.
“What did you want to talk to Josh about at his place, so early in the morning?” Clint always did pick up on the little details. I did show up at Josh’s place at an ungodly hour for a casual chat. Clint automatically assumed it must have been pretty important, and it was, but I couldn’t allow him to suspect anything. Truth be told, I needed to talk to someone and with Tess still in Europe, that limited my options to Josh. He was after all, my best friend - or some version of that.
“I’m busy the rest of the week with a freelance job, and I was out sketching in the park early this morning, and I remembered Josh lived nearby, and I hadn’t seen his apartment. I just thought... Actually, I didn’t think all that much, which was why I got a rather big surprise when I showed up at his doorstep. I won’t be making that mistake again.”
Clint continued to watch me.
“I just wanted to discuss my birthday that’s coming up is all.” I tried to sound nonchalant as I delivered the lie, hoping Clint would not pick up on it.
Clint’s body tensed, his grip on my elbow tightening.
“Why?”
“Oh Josh and I used to do this thing with rooftops and desserts, but I wasn’t sure this year...” I trailed off like it was nothing, hoping Clint would stop asking questions. I went back to adjusting my robe. As I continued to adjust myself, I felt Clint standing behind me. It was almost like he was looking over me. I turned and looked up into his eyes.
“I kind of have big plans for your birthday,” he said seriously.
“Do you?” I questioned, trying to act dumb. I had found something recently which led me to believe that Clint indeed have ‘big plans’.
“Yes. We have to attend a Lappell party the night of your birthday, but afterwards, I have a surprise for you.”
I smiled warmly at him, brus
hing off any implication he was trying to make.
Clint glanced down to his watch. “Damn, this is going to be hard to explain to my boss, especially now that I have changed clothes. I have to go. I’ll see you tonight.” He pulled me in for a deep kiss and I wrapped my arms and legs around him to get as close as I possibly could, reminding myself once again that I was his girlfriend and didn’t need to feel anything for anyone else.
We both went back to the living room and I raced over to the front door. I hadn’t noticed that in my embrace with Clint, my dressing gown had come loose in the front, exposing the corset underneath. I opened the door to Josh’s blazing green eyes, which went straight from my face to the open robe at my chest.
Shit!
My head flicked round to where Clint was in the living room. His head was buried in his briefcase, hunting for something. I was happy that he was distracted. Josh was still eyeing my corset. I quickly undid my gown, opened it up fully, and then retied it back up so nothing was open and exposed. Josh just watched as I flashed him my corset and readjusted myself. My eyes were darting back and forth between him and Clint. Just as I finished retying it, I heard Clint’s briefcase snap shut.
“Hey,” was all I managed to get out of my mouth. Josh’s lips had parted and his breathing increased from my little ‘flasher’ display.
This just keeps getting worse.
Clint walked over to me and pulled the door wide open. “Hollows, hey there. So, I heard you had an over-nighter at your place. Gave my girl a bit of a surprise.” I groaned and rolled my eyes.
“Did she tell you that?” Josh watched me curiously as he asked.
“Of course. She tells me everything,” Clint stated. Josh’s eyebrows rose up in disbelief.
Not everything.
Clint pulled me towards him as he stepped into the doorway and kissed my forehead.
“I thought you’d be at work at this time of day,” Josh questioned Clint as Clint’s hand rested on my waist.
“Yes, well there was something I forgot to, uh, do. See ya.”
Pieces of Truth Page 4