by Bella Court
"I don't know,” Kristen answered truthfully. "Maybe one day."
And the promise of a possible friendship, even a false one, was enough to make Melissa and Kristen believe.
* * *
"Just get the fuck away, John." This seemed to be the unspoken words that were said between Connor and John since that day. Connor's lips had pulled back into a vicious snarl after Kristen had left, and it had taken all his willpower not to run after her to pull her back.
"Is this supposed to fix everything? Just get the fuck out of my office, John. I don't want to see your goddamned face, I don't want to look at you. Get out."
After John grimly stalked out, Connor's head felt like he had been slammed into by a train.
He hated himself with such an intense passion right now.
She was shaking when she left. Visibly shaking, and he swore he saw tears in her eyes when she slapped him across the face. His cheek still burned from the scrapes left by her nails, but by God, he knew he deserved so much fucking more than that.
Connor could feel himself crumbling. Suddenly, this business that he had fought so long and hard for didn't seem worth it anymore. The color that had been injected into his life seemed to be draining away to be replaced by black and white.
Miserably, he knew that the decision he was making had to be done. His dad, a lowly accountant, struck out to make his own financial company, and he succeeded. Wilde Finances was a thriving corporation with thousands of employees all over the world due to his father and his own hard work and competence. How could he put the thousands of workers out of a job? The clients who needed them?
It didn't stop him from feeling guilty. He had burned her, and in doing so, burned himself. Knowing her, she might never forgive him. He didn't even want to think about that.
He didn't see her again for a few days, but he knew she was in the office. He knew Jade and Reece had heard the inevitable blow up. He knew everyone was talking about it.
He tried to find her, but it was quite clear that Kristen was very adept at not being found.
A fleeting glimpse of her hair as she rounded the corner, he'd follow after, but she'd be gone. He'd swear he heard that husky timbre of hers speaking to Jade, and when he'd round the corner, there was no sight of her. She was going out of her way to not speak to him. At least, not until she was ready.
He looked a mess and he didn't give a damn. He yearned for her. He missed her. He wanted to be with her, and for days on end, he would rage about what was keeping him from going to her.
He wanted to blame it all on John. But when Connor truly delved deeper, he knew that the only thing keeping them apart was himself. His inability to fight for her and to stand up for her when she so valiantly stood up for him against John made him feel defenseless and weak.
"Jade!" Connor called after the young girl, as she was rounding the corner. Abruptly, she stopped, but when she turned to face him, her face was grim and her eyes were hooded. She wouldn't look at him.
"Sir?" Her tone of voice was so formal that it made Connor wince. Connor stopped in front of her, unsure of what to say.
"I..." he heaved a heavy sigh, "Look, how's Kristen?"
She lifted her usually soft brown eyes to meet his cold gray gaze, and he was hit by the condemning look in her eyes.
"Why do you care?" she bit back frostily, but it wasn't in her nature to be so cold, and almost immediately after she had said it, a look of regret and shame passed over her face. She didn't want to be cruel to him, but it was hard not to be biased against him despite whatever defenses Reece had weakly put up in his favor.
Connor's face fell, and he felt like a child being reprimanded by his mother. He didn't have the right to ask, but he still wanted to know. The idea that he had made her cry made him feel weak. She had looked at him as if he was a monster, and never before had he felt so incredibly ashamed of himself.
"I know I don't have the right to ask, but you have to believe me when I say, I lo…care about her. You know I do. Please, Jade. Anything you can tell me about her." His voice was so softly pleading and his eyes were downcast with worry and hurt that Jade felt her weak defenses shatter.
Drawing in a shaky breath, Jade looked up and down the corridor. People were passing by, so she kept her voice low.
"She just needs some time to herself, Connor. You hurt her, and you know, as much as everyone likes to think so, she's not an emotionless ice bitch."
"I know." He knew better than anyone else that she was anything but.
Jade heaved another heavy sigh, and she fixed him with a pointed stare. "Tell me you're going to fix this. Tell me that you're going to go to her groveling on your hands and knees, whatever it takes to get her back. You know that she's worth it, don't you? You do realize that no matter how hard you search, you're never going to find another woman half as amazing as her?"
"It's not that easy," Connor muttered.
"Well, you don't deserve her, then. Think about that,” Jade said shortly. "There's always going to be work, and you can always keep your prestigious family name going. But there's only one Kristen, and you're going to regret it if you let her go."
Jade gave him a sympathetic look and continued softly, "You're a smart man. If you honestly wanted to be with her, you'd find a way to fight for her and keep your company. You could be with her and have your company still, you know."
Seemingly finished with the conversation, Jade sauntered away, and Connor felt sufficiently dismissed. However, when she turned around, she flashed him that trademark adorable smile of hers and called back, "Did you know her favorite flowers are lilies? Unusual colored ones. She always cries at the end of the Notebook, but her favorite movie is Breakfast at Tiffany's. She loves those Turtle chocolates, you know the ones with caramel and pecans? Grand gestures are always good to get back into a girl's good graces, you know."
He gave her a grateful smile, and she returned it, "Time's running out, Connor. We're almost finished decorating your building, and before you know it, she'll be out of your life."
Later that day, Connor's desk was piled high with papers. Contracts, bills, numbers. He was sick of it. He used to thrive on it, knowing that the satisfaction he felt with himself in the end would be all worth it. He wasn't sure if it was, anymore. He worked so much that he felt like he was really missing out on some of the greater things in life.
With a jarring ring, the phone resounded throughout his office, and with lifeless fingers, Connor lifted the receiver.
"Sir? Ms. Satou is here to finalize some papers with you, are you busy?"
His heart nearly leapt out of his chest. Briefly, he ran a finger over his jawline. He hadn't bothered with hygiene much, lately, and he knew he looked like hell. Stubble that was rapidly turning into a beard grew on his jaw, but with a flicker of hope, he remembered that she liked stubble. Not too sure how she felt about a beard, though. Dark encircled his vivid gray eyes, which suddenly took on more light than they had seen in days.
Sitting up straighter, he cleared his throat and said with more vigor than he felt, "Send her in."
Even though the air condition filtered in through the vents above, Connor could feel the perspiration slowly gliding down the nape of his neck, and the sudden flutter that had erupted in his stomach. He was dreading this very moment. Dreading it, but wanting nothing more than to see her again.
With the smooth swing of the door, he held his breath, anticipation gripping him, and when she stepped through, he forgot to breathe.
It was as if she had made damn sure that before she came into the office today, she would be sure she looked good just to make torture him.
A red satin corset gripped her waist, pushing her breasts up and forward, as well as emphasizing her small waist. As if that wasn't bad enough, she had paired the beautiful red with a black pencil skirt that flowed over her hips to her knees, tightly rounding every delicious curve and corner. Tucked within an arm was a tailored black jacket for modesty, but she most certain
ly wasn't wearing it. Her dark unruly hair spread and tumbled across her shoulders like a silken waterfall, and she had never looked more beautiful.
He never wanted her more.
He drank her in, praying that this wouldn't be the last time he saw her look this way.
She looked calm, cool, and grave. She tortured him further by walking slowly, her hips swaying in a timeless seductive rhythm, the click clack of her heels against the black marble she had put in.
He couldn't take his eyes off of her, and if he was drooling, he didn't care.
Without a greeting, she sat down in one of his chairs, crossing her lean legs, and dropping a thick wad of papers on his desk.
"What's this?" Connor asked breathlessly, not bothering to look at the papers. His eyes were hungry, and he felt a lurch a go through him. She wasn't meeting his eyes.
"Mimosa Designs has finished with the redecoration of Wilde Towers. We will need the second part of our payment, and your signature on these documents." Her tone was formal, and she still hadn't bothered to meet his gaze.
"You're completely finished?" Connor asked disbelievingly. It couldn't have been more than three months that she had been working here.
Kristen gave a slight nod of her head. "With the exception of a few minor details and placements, Jade and I are done. After a few days, there should no longer be a need for our services."
Connor's throat tightened. She was leaving. She was going to go, and he would never see her again.
"Kristen–”
"Just sign the documents, Connor. We don't need to talk about it,” Kristen said softly, finally meeting his gaze, and he felt scorched. Her dark brown eyes were soft, melancholy, and so vulnerable that Connor felt a rush of longing course through his veins.
God, it was more than just want. He needed her. He would never find someone who understood him better than she did, and he didn't want her to find another person who understood her the way he did.
"We do need to talk about it," Connor persisted.
"I…God, I want to be with you. I want to be with you more than anyone else–”
"Apparently not."
"This wasn't an easy decision, and I just…please tell me you understand. You know how important my work is to me, and my dad…"
"It's not supposed to be easy!" Kristen snapped, her eyes turning hard. "You made your decision, Connor, and I respect that! I know, okay? I know more than anyone else how important to you your work is,” she said the last part mockingly, bitterly, and with just a hint of desperation and wildness in her voice.
Breathing heavily, she managed to regain a bit of the composure she felt when she first walked into the office. "You don't get everything you want in life, Connor. I know it wasn't easy for you, but it doesn't stop me from hurting. It doesn't stop me from feeling like I've been messily tossed aside, and that no woman stands a chance of ever being put first when she's with you."
She looked at him, and he was stunned to see the sadness in her eyes. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came. She was right, plain and simple. Old habits die hard. He might have placed her before his work a few times, but ultimately, he placed his work first.
He couldn't say anything, and she knew it. For all the times she had cried her heart out to him, she could count on one finger the time he had truly opened up to her and let her into the dark recesses of himself.
"If you had wanted to be with me, honestly and truly wanted to be with me, you would have fought harder. You would have figured it out. A way to keep your beloved company and me."
She was so tired of feeling worthless, like no man would ever value her. Biting her lower lip, she stood up to leave.
"Kristen…." His voice was pleading, soft, and her heart breaking, she turned around against her will to face him, her eyes shining.
"I love you,” he said simply and quietly in a last ditch attempt to get her to forgive him. It sounded forced, and Kristen wanted to throttle him for saying that to her.
Kristen could feel herself shaking, and she shook her head vigorously. Why did he have to make this so much harder for her?
"Don't say that to me,” she said shakily.
"I do."
"Any idiot can love another person!" Kristen cried, her eyes watering, and she could feel herself begin to cry. "But its what you do to the people that you say you love that matters. So don't say it when you don't mean it, Connor. Don't say it, when you can't even bother to back it up with your actions."
He stood up abruptly, and he sauntered over to her. She was rooted to the spot. She tried willing her body to go, but once again, still his eyes rendered her. They looked so tired and stressed when she had first come into his office, but now they were ablaze.
He towered over her, and she could feel her breath catch in her throat.
"I'll prove it to you,” he said so firmly that she almost believed him. She wanted to believe him.
With two fingers he gently lifted her chin, and with the other he gently brushed away the tears that had fallen. His hands were rough against her smooth skin, but the contrast made her yearn for more. Before she could stop him, he gently touched his lips to hers.
Outraged, her immediate reaction was to push away, but her lips opened in surprise, and he gently kissed her, a sweet, passionate kiss that promised of more. She could feel herself trembling, and she could feel his powerful hands grip her waist to steady her. When she finally came to her senses, she pushed him away, but her lips still stung from his kiss.
He stared at her, and it was like a fire had finally been lit beneath him. "I'm going to figure this out, and I'm going to spend as long as it takes to get you to forgive me and come back to me."
He kept poking her cheek. His fingernail would gently scrape along the smooth rounded curve of her face, before taking the fullness between his fingers and giving a soft pinch. She tried ignoring it, until he gave a particular hard pinch that made her whine.
* * *
"Reece!" Jade scolded, swatting his fingers away. Reece let an easy chuckle pass through those luscious lips of his, and he stretched his long arm along the back of her chair, noticing the slight shiver that went through her when his arm lightly brushed her back.
The smug grin on his face said it all.
"What are you doing?" Reece asked, as Jade's small fingers ruffled through a small pile of papers in her lap. She had come into his office to do a quick inventory of all the expenses she had made in redecorating his office.
"I'm sorting through some receipts. I need to get these back to Kristen for her to check through them so she can file them away as expenses for all the furniture we bought for you and John's offices."
"Mmm." He murmured, a little put off by how easily she was ignoring him.
"You didn't come to dinner with me at Maggiano's," Reece said nonchalantly. The Italian family style restaurant was one of his favorite places to eat.
"And you said you would come find me if I didn't come," Jade pointed out sweetly. "Besides, I decided to save myself the effort. Maggiano's requires that you have at least a party of four to eat there, remember?"
Right. Reece had completely forgotten about that. The food was served family style, with everyone at the table partaking of the food in the middle, and the food ordered was replaced whenever more was desired. Whenever Reece went there, he made sure to stuff himself with enough food to keep him full for days afterwards. The massive portions probably explained why you needed a party of at least four to eat there.
Reece decided to focus on Jade's first comment instead of his forgetfulness. "Oh, so was that what it was? You wanted me to come looking for you?" Reece drawled, trying hard to keep up the façade of suaveness with just a touch of arrogance to draw her in. It didn't seem to be working so well, dammit.
"Well, when you say you're going to do something, I would hope you follow through with it."
Reece could feel his frustration growing. He had been trying so hard to get back into her good graces, b
ut Jade had been a complete enigma all week. She'd be sultry and hot one moment, making Reece think he had a chance with her, then the next, she'd be as cold as a glacier.
She was definitely having a glacial moment. "Are you going to hold that night we slept together against me forever?" Dropping all pretenses, Reece went straight for the jugular, finally ready to talk about what he had been painstakingly avoiding.
Jade looked slightly startled by his abrupt change in demeanor and subject matter. She took a heavy breath and replied, "I'm only going to hold it against you until you grow up and acknowledge that it happened."
"Well here I am, I'm acknowledging it. You happy?" he demanded.
Jade's ire rose. "No, I'm not happy! God, you are so confusing! We sleep together, you're my first, you promise that you're not going to hurt me, and what's the next thing you do? You go and pretend like it never happened at all! Great way to make a girl's first time feel like it was worth something!"
Reece's mouth opened like a goldfish, faltering for a moment, before he regained his footing. He was confusing? Well, she wasn't exactly crystal clear herself.
"I didn't know what to do!" Reece snapped in his defense, "Look, I never meant to hurt you in any way. I thought ignoring it would be the best way to make it feel like we were both comfortable with one another again."
"Ooh, good plan! So avoiding and ignoring people is how you make things comfortable again, hmm? That may fly when you're sleeping with other girls, but it's not going to work with me." Jade sarcastically replied. She had risen to her feet, her receipts forgotten.
Reece nearly growled his reply, "Oh, because you're completely innocent in all this? It takes two to tango, sweetheart. I certainly didn't have to coerce you too much to get you into my bed. Why is this unlucky situation my entire fault? Then you have the nerve to go sleep with some piece of shit named Walter! Not so virginal, are we?"
That earned him a well-placed slap across the face and a gut punch that sent him doubling over. The girl certainly knew how to place her punches to make a man fall to his knees.