“I’m okay.”
“There’s healthy shit in there. My chef went to the grocery store last night, and I’m pretty sure there’s stuff in there to make one of your drinks.”
I want to ask him if he purposely had his chef get the stuff for me, or if it was a regular thing, but I don’t.
Only a few seconds pass before the doorbell rings.
“Can you get that for me? It’s probably Thomas and Max,” Knox asks.
He takes the last bite of his sandwich, crumbles the wrapper in his fist, and throws it back into the bag. He’s on his way to the trashcan as I go to answer the door.
We all gather around the dining room table. I grab my notebook from my bag and take the seat next to Knox. I listen to the three men and hastily scribble down everything I can as if I’m going to be tested on it later. I know how important tours are, they’re the butter to your bread, and you need them organized properly to make sure everything goes smooth.
They go through every stadium he’ll be performing at in every city and decide whether he’ll be staying on his bus or in a hotel after each one. It’s my responsibility to book the suites and make sure he has everything he needs upon his arrival.
“Don’t forget to book a room for yourself,” Knox says, looking over at me. “I’d prefer one on the same floor as mine.”
A room for myself?
I drop the pen in my hand. “I’m sorry … a what for who?”
“You are going to need a place to sleep. You’re more than welcome to crash on the bus or a hotel room. It’s your choice. I pay for it, so don’t worry about the price.”
All eyes are on me. I’m not looking around to make sure of it, but I can feel them.
I shift around in my chair. “I’m going on tour with you?” He nods, and I whip around to glare at Thomas. This was never part of the arrangement. “I’m going on tour with him?” Thomas nods. “You never said anything about me going on tour and traveling across the country.”
Thomas gives me hopeful look. “We were undecided until last night. Knox seems to like you working for him, so I think you’re suitable to take over for awhile.”
“I have school,” I fire back. What’s the best excuse to try to get out of this but not lose my job at the same time?
“In three months. You can come back when school starts, and we’ll figure out a replacement for you then.”
“I’m confused.” Too many questions are flying through my mind, and my brain is incapable of spitting out one in particular at the moment.
“Don’t worry, we’ll provide you with everything you’ll need,” Knox says, giving me a bright smile. “You’ll be doing the same stuff you’re doing now, only on the road.”
“I’ll need to go over my schedule and make sure it’s okay,” I lie.
“You’re getting paid good money to do this, Libby,” Thomas says, starting the same lecture he’d given me before. “There’s nothing, and I mean nothing, you’ll find that will give you anything near the salary you’re getting with Knox.”
“I’ll give you a raise, if need be,” Knox throws out. “You traveling with me obviously puts a damper on your party or whatever.”
Everyone is staring at me, and I feel like the biggest pain in the ass that’s ever lived.
“You don’t have to do that,” I reply, blowing out a breath. “It’s fine. It just took me by surprise, that’s all.”
Everyone nods, but the room grows quiet as we all pretend to be engrossed into studying the paperwork.
Knox finally breaks the silence. “I thought I told you I need more days while I’m in Houston?”
“I thought one was enough?” Max asks.
“No. I need three. Move a date around and fix it.”
Everyone nods in response, and I’m not sure who exactly is responsible for rescheduling.
“So … is that my job?” I ask. The last thing I need is for them to expect me to do something and it doesn’t get done.
“No. I’ve got it,” Max answers. “Your job is Knox. It’s my responsibility to keep track of dates and arenas. I’ll get it changed, but you’ll most likely have to drive overnight to the next city since we’ve already sold tickets for the dates.”
“That’s no problem. I’d rather do that and be able to spend time with my family. If either of you guys needs anything else, contact me or Libby, preferably Libby because she’s much better at this shit than I am. I only show up and perform then leave the rest to you guys,” Knox says.
Max gets up and slaps him on the back. “That’s what we’re here for, buddy.”
Thomas stands up next, says goodbye, and the two guys disappear from the kitchen.
Knox looks right at me as soon as we hear the front door close. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?” Why do I feel like he keeps asking me this same question? For someone who’s portrayed as being a selfish asshole, he sure makes it his mission to check that I’m okay with stuff. He frowns at my nod. “No, you’re not. I can tell when you’re lying, and I don’t want you to do something you’re not comfortable with.”
I snort. “You don’t know me well enough to know when I’m lying.”
“You’re a female.”
“And? What the hell does that have to do with the price of rice in China?”
He laughs. “I can tell when females are lying.”
I don’t want to give him the real reason why I’m so nervous about going on tour with him. It’s too personal. The last tour I went on with my dad was a nightmare and changed who I am as a person. I’ve never been able to fully come to terms with it.
“We still have two weeks before the tour starts. If you feel like I’m unbearable to travel with, you don’t have to come. Don’t come because it’s your job. I can’t be around someone miserable all the time.”
“But it is my job.”
“You’re getting paid to travel the country and sometimes manage my ass and keep me out of trouble. If anything, you should be paying me for all the fun you’re going to have.”
“Good luck with that. I can’t even afford rent right now.”
He sits down. “So what happened? You obviously came from money, where did it all go?”
“You seriously didn’t look me up?”
“Briefly. I read the first paragraph on Wiki. It told me how old you are, where you were born, that your dad is some rock legend having money problems, but I didn’t go any further than that. I was hoping I’d get the truth from you, the real story, because we all know Wiki doesn’t have it.”
“I don’t feel like talking about it.”
“How about this then? Every day I see you, we both have to reveal one thing about ourselves to each other. A secret a day.”
“What are we, twelve?”
“We might be traveling thousands of miles together. I need to make sure you aren’t one of those crazy people who choose jam over jelly, eat their steaks rare, or trim their toenails with their teeth.”
I roll my eyes. “First off, picking jam over jelly is a hate crime, secondly, rare is gross, and never, and I mean never, have I trimmed my toenails with my teeth.” I shudder. “What kind of people do you hang out with?”
“Just making sure you’re not some jam eating, toenail munching freak.”
I shove his arm. “You are seriously such an asshole, you know that?”
“We won’t Google each other or read gossip magazines. Anything I learn about you, I hear it from your mouth. Deal?”
“No deal. I’d prefer for us to stay out of each other’s personal business.”
“I’ll go first. I’m extremely attracted to you.”
I throw my pen at him. “I’m out of here.”
“What? What do you mean you’re out of here? I have rehearsal for the LA show.”
Fuck. “I thought I told you I had to get off early today?” He shakes his head, and with everything going on, I probably did forget to mention it. “Crap, then I meant to.”
“Is it impor
tant?”
“Kind of, but it’s not a big deal. I’ll cancel.”
“What is it?”
“A personal day.”
“Am I going to get a doctor’s note?”
“You can’t be serious?”
He laughs. “Go ahead, but try to get all of your errands done today. We have a packed schedule ahead of us.”
He has rehearsals for his tour today, but I didn’t think he’d need me for it. They’ve already hired all of the backup dancers and picked out wardrobe, but Knox has to go back through all of the choreography and make sure he’s comfortable with everything.
“Got it.”
I’ve never been to a prison, and to be honest, I never thought I’d have to.
I’ve watched plenty of documentaries on them, but the real thing is so different. I walk through the front doors and start to think about kids who’ve had to do this for years because a parent received decades or life long sentences. It’s sad, and I can’t even imagine how I would feel if my dad would’ve been put in here when I was a young, confused child.
He only added a few people to his visitation list – including Thomas, a few of his bandmates, and me. My mom wasn’t added, for good reason, considering neither one of us has heard from her in years.
“Hey honey,” he greets, smiling.
His hair is pulled back into a clean and combed ponytail, and his beard is a little longer. His prison uniform doesn’t cover half of his tattoos that trail up his arms, and I eye his right hand, where my name is scrawled along his fingers.
He doesn’t look terrible, but he’s in a federal prison. I’ve heard it’s more for white-collar crimes, almost similar to a country club, except you’re a convict who can’t leave and have a few rules.
“Hi dad,” I reply, scrunching up my nose. “This place doesn’t look too bad.”
“It could be worse. I have to look on the bright side that it’s only temporary. I’ve already scheduled interviews for when I get out to start paying the Government back. I even have an offer for a book deal.”
“Good. I can’t wait to have you home.”
“So how have you been, my girl? Thomas said he got you a job working with one of those pretty boy types.”
I laugh at him referring to Knox as a pretty boy, considering The Grave Diggers performed their shows with painted faces and make-up. My dad does his eyeliner better than I do.
“I’m working as his personal assistant, and he’s even more high maintenance than you were.” He chuckles, and I hesitate before telling him about the video and decide against it. I’ll break the news over the phone. “We’re going on tour.”
His blue eyes widen, and he runs a hand over his face. That sentence changed the entire mood of the visit. “Tour? You know tours aren’t a good idea for you.”
“That was years ago. I’ve grown up. I’m smarter. Not to mention, the pay is great, and I need the money.”
I see the guilt form on his face. “I’m sorry about this. I promise to pay you back every dime you have to pay of your tuition. It’s my responsibility as a father to provide your education.”
“Don’t stress about that, okay? You’ve supported me for twenty-three years. It’s about time I do it myself.”
“A father never stops stressing about his child,” he mutters. “I feel like I failed you, spending all that money on booze and bitches, when I should’ve been saving it.”
“Five minutes until visitation is over,” a voice says from the ceiling speakers.
“I guess that’s our cue,” he says. “Be safe on that tour, you hear me? And keep in touch.”
“You know I will, dad.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
A few tears slip from my eyes on my way back to the Jeep.
13
Knox
“No matter how many times I’ve performed here, I fall in love with this stadium every single time,” I say, turning around to look at Libby and walking backward. “The first time was when I was fourteen. Thomas somehow convinced a singer to let me open up for her. Playing in front of thousands of people was way different than doing it on the streets. I was so nervous that I pissed myself.”
“You’re lying,” Libby says, laughing.
She walked in a few minutes ago, but I’ve been here for hours rehearsing for my opening show at the Staples Center tomorrow night. I want to start out with a bang and everything to be perfect.
“I’m being completely honest. Good thing I did it before I got on stage, and Thomas was smart enough to make sure I had backup clothes. Pissing yourself at fourteen is embarrassing enough, but pissing yourself in front of thousands of people would’ve been mortifying. I would’ve quit right then, moved to a different country, and started to raise sheep or some shit.”
“Oh, don’t be so dramatic. I bet the girls would still love you, piss pants and all.” She snaps her fingers. “Those pants would probably sell for thousands on eBay, so if you have them laying around anywhere, I’d be more than happy to take them off your hands.”
“Oh Libs, I knew you secretly wanted to get your hands in my pants.”
“Or I want to make money off them.”
I point down to my dick. “You can take these and sell them … if you unbuckle them with your teeth.”
“Is it okay if I bite?”
“That’s not nice.” I shake my head, chuckling, and then turn back around so she can follow me. I gesture towards the buffet table loaded with food that’s set up in the back room. “I had breakfast catered in for everyone. Help yourself.”
“Thanks. I’m starving.”
We load our plates with waffles and bacon and sit down at a table in the middle of the room.
“So do you have a doctor’s note?”
“Nope, and you’re not getting one,” she says, stabbing into her waffle with a fork. “And thanks for letting me leave early.”
I tear into my bacon, savoring the taste, because I know my trainer is going to be watching everything I eat while I’m on the road. “Guess what time it is?”
“What?”
“Secret of the day,” I sing out.
She groans. “I told you we aren’t playing that stupid game.”
“Yes, we are.”
“I hate the idea.”
“And I love it.”
“Fine,” she groans. “But you’re going first.”
I lower my voice to tell her something I haven’t shared with anyone. “I’m terrified of fucking this tour up. All eyes are on me, and I’ve never had this much pressure in my life. I feel like this is going to mend or break my career. One or the other, there’s no in-between.”
An unexpected amount of tension falls from me.
Damn, it feels good getting that out.
She takes a long chug of her orange juice and swallows it down with a sigh. She’s shocked by my honesty. “I visited my dad in prison yesterday. That’s why I needed to leave early.”
I know telling me this is a big deal to her, and I’m surprised Thomas didn’t spill the beans about her dad being in prison.
“Damn babe, that sucks. I wish you’d told me that. I wouldn’t have given you such a hard time. I feel like a jackass now.”
“Don’t. You let me go, didn’t you? That’s all that matters. You would’ve been a jackass if you refused to let me leave.”
I lean back in my chair, stretching my legs out. I love that she’s opening up to me. “What’s he in for?” I know I’m technically asking for another secret, and she may not answer it considering how guarded she is, but it’s worth a try.
“You really don’t know?”
“I told you I stay far, far away from the tabloids.”
“Tax fraud.” She pauses. “He’s in prison for tax fraud.”
“Not fun.” If there’s one thing my accountant has always stressed to me, it’s don’t fuck with the IRS. I pay millions in taxes every year, but I don’t mind. Taxes and the welfare syste
m once fed me and put a roof over my head. “Is that why Thomas is always throwing out the fact that you need money?”
“Yes. The IRS liquidated everything. His three homes, including my condo in the hills, our cars, and froze our bank accounts. They wanted their money and didn’t give a shit about how we were going to pay for our next meal. My dad took a plea to spend eight months in prison, and thankfully Mia let me move in with her.”
“Wow, thank you for telling me that. I’ve always wondered why Thomas keeps throwing out that you need money. It’s not cool he does that.”
“I’ve known Thomas my entire life. He’s not saying it to be rude. He gave me this job as a favor, and he knows my degree is one of the most important things to me.”
I nod. “I get it, but I think they took your car for the sake of public safety.”
She narrows her eyes my way but cracks a smile. “For someone who complains about my driving so much, you sure want to ride with me all the time.”
“I told you. I hate your driving, but love your company.” I shrug. “Plus I can do business in the car when you’re driving. If you need any more days off to visit him, let me know, and I’ll make sure you’re open.”
She nods, although I’m not sure if she actually will. She gets up, grabs our plates, and starts heading towards the trash.
It makes me feel good she’s opening up to me, but I’m not sure why I want in so bad.
14
Libby
I chew the last bite of my sandwich and look across the couch at Mia. “So I have some news,” I tell her.
She drops the chip in her hand. “Oh my God, you’re pregnant?”
“What? No. Why is that the first thing that comes to your mind when I say I have news? Who do you think knocked me up? My vibrator?”
“I don’t know,” she says, laughing. “You’ve been jittery as hell all day and then you say you have news, so I assumed it was something serious – either you’re dying or pregnant. I obviously would prefer you be pregnant over dying, so I made it my first choice.”
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