by April Karber
“Miss Elizabeth, if this is at all due to the comment I made to Mr. Bingley last night, I am truly sorry. It was inappropriate as well as not true. I was in a very ill tempered mood and I made a hurried and regrettable attempt at convincing Bingley I did not wish to participate in the festivities. I am truly sorry and had I known you or anyone was within earshot, the comment would not have been made. I wish I could have apologized earlier, I am embarrassed to have appeared so badly.”
“The only apology I need hear is one for your apparent dislike for my companions and neighbors and your utter disregard for their feelings. Your comment, rude as it was, does not warrant an explanation or an apology, for I do not rely on the positive opinions of others to make me happy. Your disapproval of all at yesterday’s assembly went unnoticed by few. Are you so proud and conceited as to think you, Mr. Darcy of Pemberley, may act in any manner you please when amongst lesser people?”
He appeared as if he had been slapped, but recovered collected enough. A trait of the upper classes, Elizabeth assumed.
“I do not pretend to understand you. But if you do not accept my apology, there is a great deal rather less to say to one another.”
“You slighted all that attempted to welcome you, you showed no appreciation by your brooding and your hiding amongst your own party, when you were encouraged to dance by your friend, you declined outright, making it generally known that no one here is worthy of your company. Your comment about me was not surprising, but rather a continuation of your behavior, as is your sudden removal to London after a three-night stay. Even if we are so contemptible a people, we’d appreciate a small kindness or at the very least, a meager attempt at civility.”
! '! Elizabeth finally glimpsed another side of Darcy other than unapproachable, bored, or disapproving. Anger flashed across his face after he recovered from his disbelief. How dare she accuse me of impropriety and incivility? How was the country so backwards? Never had such words been associated with his name. He was a gentleman, and always behaved as such!
Why was this young woman so angry with him if not for the slight? He thought back to his behavior the night before. How could anything in my conduct warrant such a reproach? He had been in an extremely foul mood. A four-hour long coach ride with Miss Bingley, for that is the only person he could remember of the ride as she never stopped talking, had ruined any of his hopes of a relaxing escape to the country with his friend. Choosing to even accompany Bingley had been agony in itself. He still did not know whether leaving Georgiana was the right course of action. But, Mrs. Reynolds, his trusted housekeeper, had been the one to suggest he give Georgiana some space, and Mrs. Reynolds had yet to be wrong.
He closed his eyes tightly, banishing thoughts of Georgiana for the time being before beginning. “I do not possess the disposition that my friend Mr. Bingley has of enjoying himself no matter his prior mood or the lack of familiarity with his surroundings. If this is, as you say, your opinion of me as well as that of the rest of the Meryton, then I am very happy indeed with my choice to quit the area. If you appeared any less stubborn I might venture to defend my reputation and character, but I don’t see that your mind can be changed. It appears to me quite made up, and pleased with the drawn conclusion.”
“Like you have at the assembly, Mr. Darcy, you have judged without what I believe to be enough reason. Besides walking and dancing I very much fancy the studying of character. To observe the alteration of one’s conduct for better is one of the greatest pleasures in my life. It is a rarity and demands a command of character which many do not possess.”
This girl’s company was less relaxing than that of Miss Bingley’s! He thought, a flicker of a smile running across his lips as he imagined Miss Bingley and Miss Elizabeth in a coach together. It would cause the driver to run off the road and the horses to bolt!
“And I am not to be included in the masses?” he asked. “It would remain to be seen, Mr. Darcy. But I suppose Meryton will never be able to gain the acknowledgement of it.”
Was this a challenge? How is that she had a response to better me at every turn? She is more pleasant than Miss Bingley, he mused despite himself. She was nothing like her elder sister; not in looks or personality, nor anyone Mr. Darcy had ever met before. Angry though he was, he could not help enjoying this argument, it was far different than what he had been expecting. He was surprised that he did not think her remotely handsome last night, when now, in complete opposition of him, she appeared rather beautiful. If I was wrong about her looks, could I have been wrong about everything else as well? Surely he could not have been in the best state to form opinions after his being cornered by Miss Bingley for hours in a coach, but he could never have behaved as abominably as she made it out to be. Perhaps the ton’s habit of exaggeration has just reached Hertfordshire and Miss Bennet is doing her best to see that she practices it. He decided he would ask Bingley for a report on his conduct, just in case the man had noticed anything but the pretty faces in the room. Bingley was always taken by some girl
! (! at a ball, but it had always been in London, where there were too many for him to focus his attention on just one. Since there was only one lady with whom Bingley was smitten in Hertfordshire, Darcy was beginning to consider that this might be a problem.
No more was said on the walk, and the silence left Darcy to worry and doubt, and Elizabeth to enjoy her small triumph, made more impressive by the gentleman’s silence.
Chapter 3 Elizabeth’s triumph was short lived, however, for upon their return to the house Mrs. Bennet insisted that they take some tea. Bingley could make no argument, eager as he was to continue his time with Jane, but Darcy, who had been so eager to quit the party and make the necessary arrangements for his journey to London, was crushed. He could not think of an excuse to leave his friend alone, however, so silently accepted the invitation. Elizabeth was torn. As much as she was grateful for the time it allowed her sister and Bingley to become acquainted, the setting of Longbourn risked her family’s exposing of certain failings and embarrassments.
Luckily, Kitty and Lydia were still abed, too exhausted from their dancing and flirting the night before. The observation of which had made Mary in too severe a mood to pay attention to anything but a serious book that she hoped would work against such memories. Therefore, only Mrs. Bennet could provide any resource of torture for Elizabeth and Jane, and she did so admirably for being alone.
“Mr. Bingley, it is so good of you to call on us so soon after the ball! Such a gentlemen!” Mr. Darcy was quite ignored, considered not to be a potential husband of any of her daughters. Mrs. Bennet instead chose to throw Darcy frequent looks of disdain.
“I had such a delightful time, Mrs. Bennet. In fact, the night was not long enough.”
“Perhaps you might consider hosting a ball at Netherfield, Mr. Bingley. The place would do it justice. A fine ball indeed! Would you tolerate such a thing, Mr. Darcy?”
If the suggestion of the ball hadn’t been painful enough, the unmasked allusion to Mr. Darcy’s conduct the night before was agonizing. Elizabeth could not help but inhale audibly and sharply. She was just about to make a response which she hoped would deter her mother’s insinuation, but just then, Mr. Darcy made his own response.
“I regret to say that I will not have the pleasure of attending, Mrs. Bennet. Business takes me to London the day after next.” As inappropriate as Mrs. Bennet’s comment had been, it had echoed the opinion that Elizabeth voiced. Had she been right? Was this the generally held opinion of himself in Meryton?
Mrs. Bennet went into a panic lest Mr. Bingley should be affected. “Oh! I hope this does not affect your plans in the country, Mr. Bingley!”
“I am pleased to say that I will remain here with my sister,” he answered soundly.
“What a relief. You great men are always about here and there, never quite settling in one place. But you have no idea what a strain it causes on those you leave behind, we would be sad to see you leave so quickly. You have not
even had the opportunity to dine with us!”
! )! “Yes, I only wish my friend was fortunate enough to stay, but he is much busier than I.” Elizabeth thought this comment quite odd, as it occurred to her that though it could be readily assumed that Darcy was leaving due to his unhappiness with the place, that it didn’t appear he had said as much to his friend. Mr. Bingley did not possess the countenance for lying, and his large eyes could not hide truth, therefore, he must truly believe that his friend had business to attend. Which made another thing clear: Darcy had not acknowledged to his friend that his reasons for leaving were his severe displeasure with the place. Elizabeth did not know what to make of this. Was he lying to his friend so as not to sway him from departing as well, or did he really embark on business? But if that were the case, would he be returning?
“Well, I suppose if you are not pleased with the company that a place has to offer, it is more agreeable to go elsewhere,” Mrs. Bennet observed.
No one could manage a response for some time. Elizabeth could feel Darcy’s eyes on her and her embarrassment heightened. How could she have defended her family and friends when this is the treatment he received from them?
Darcy’s thoughts were otherwise busied by yet another allusion to his poor behavior. As inconsiderate and incompetent as he found Mrs. Bennet to be, she had not failed to notice his displeasure. It must have been obvious. He looked to Elizabeth, expecting to find a look a satisfaction on her face, but was surprised to find her sickened with embarrassment. She studied the floor with such fervor that he thought her eyes were likely to pop out of her head. Her face was bright red and her hands clenched the seat cushion. It seemed she found her mother’s comments as embarrassing and inappropriate as he had. Just then, her head snapped up, her large eyes met his for a brief moment, and she looked around before addressing her mother.
“Mama, preference for one place over another cannot be criticized, for we have the highest regard of Meryton above anything else because that is where we live. It would not be fair to expect one to see all of its charms in one night, as we have come to hold in high regard over time. A country ball could have hardly shown any town or any group of people in their most complimentary light. Anyone’s good opinion of the place, I hope, will strengthen and improve with the length of his stay.”
Elizabeth hoped this was a significant enough apology, and that it would be affective enough to steer the topic away from Mr. Darcy as well as hint upon the blossoming affection between Bingley and Jane. She intended to glance quickly at Mr. Darcy to see how her comment was received, but found herself caught in the most incredulous stare. She did not know what to make of it.
“I suppose so,” her mother continued, “and we will be glad to acquaint you with all that Meryton and the countryside has to offer, Mr. Bingley.”
Elizabeth winced noticeably, still caught in the Mr. Darcy’s gaze. To her surprise, it was he who spoke next.
“I’m afraid we’ve trespassed upon your hospitality long enough,” he looked at Bingley significantly, who had otherwise been staring at Jane. Though Elizabeth did not know if Darcy’s intention was to relieve her of further embarrassment, it was certainly the outcome.
Mrs. Bennet looked from one gentleman to the other, desperate to come up with something that would have Bingley in her house again. Inspiration struck.
! *! “Mr. Bingley, Mr. Darcy, if you are not otherwise engaged we would like to invite your company to supper. Before Mr. Darcy’s departure, of course.”
Elizabeth need not look at Mr. Darcy to guess that it was a pained expression he wore. Bingley, on the other hand, could hardly contain his eagerness, and so it was decided that supper would occur the next day.
One more hour in the company of the Bennet family, Elizabeth decided, and the defense of her family would be ridiculous.
“Are you to return to Netherfield, Mr. Bingley?” asked Mrs. Bennet delicately.
“Yes, Mrs. Bennet, I believe we shall.” Bingley replied happily, unaware that he was already lodged in the woman’s snare.
“Jane and Elizabeth will happily accompany you, if that is agreeable. Why they had been planning an errand to Meryton in any case.”
Too late, Elizabeth thought, they were certifiably ridiculous.
Chivalry demanded that the men escort the horses on foot, and in this way, the gentlemen took their leave of Longbourn accompanied by the eldest daughters of the house.
“Do you often walk to Meryton? Isn’t it a long way?” Bingley asked the sisters. “The walk is agreeable enough if the weather coincides. We do not often use the carriage for such errands so we are all of us skilled walkers, Elizabeth the most accomplished.”
“Is that so?”
Elizabeth felt both men’s eyes upon her as she answered.
“I suppose my sister has chosen well in telling you of something that is difficult to gauge. If I say that I am an accomplished walker, neither of you can know for certain.”
Jane and Mr. Bingley laughed while Mr. Darcy studied her in silence. When Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy had again pulled ahead a distance, they could no longer rely on what they overheard of Jane and Bingley’s conversation to excuse their silence.
“I believe Mr. Bingley is the most congenial man I have ever had the fortune of meeting,” Elizabeth said, determined to end the awkward silence, and throwing a surreptitious glance at the gentleman and her sister.
“I agree with you. Wherever he goes, smiles follow.” Though some, like the eldest Miss Bennet, smile too often.
“How is it that you are acquainted with him?” Opposites attract, indeed.
“You are perhaps curious as to the stark contrasts of our nature, am I correct?”
“I suppose,” she answered, taking the time to study his strong brow, stubborn jaw, and firm scowl. Friends of convenience, it must be. Miss Caroline Bingley can be the only common thread these men have to each other. Why are they not yet engaged?
“We were first introduced at school. Since then, I have seen to it that he was accepted into society, and he, that I adopt a more agreeable façade.”
Was he in jest? She would almost swear that his downturned mouth was at odds with its natural state.
“You have seen with your own eyes,” he continued, “that it is a work in progress.”
This mask of disdain has a wry sense of humor! Whether it was wasted on him or suitable to his character, she could not tell for certain.
! "+! “These things take time,” she said, trying to match his dry tone so as not to betray a hint of humor in her words. “Practice as well.”
Another challenge, he realized. “That is similar to what I said to Bingley,” he said, highly anticipating her reaction.
He was not disappointed, her laughter rang delightfully in his ears as he admired her flushed cheeks, pleasing smile, and bright eyes. He had caught her off guard, and she did not know what to say next, nor what he might say in the meantime. Caroline Bingley had been on to something when she had described Miss Elizabeth’s eyes. Though they were not quite wild, Darcy thought. Exciting, perhaps. Distinct and vibrant.
“I possess neither,” he started, “my friend’s affability nor his easiness with strangers. My qualities, or lack thereof, cannot justify my conduct at the assembly, however. So I will therefore endeavor to apologize for any actions and words that may have been perceived as unmannerly.”
His sentiments softened his features, accentuating his redeeming physical qualities, but his choice of the words, “that may have been perceived as unmannerly” soured the entire gesture. It was more than she had been expecting, however, and admitted to herself that he had surprised her once again, leaving her with the responsibility of returning the favor.
“It is unfortunate that your removal to London will leave Bingley without the favor of your instruction, I’m afraid he’s still in need of improvement.” She did not care, she realized, how he perceived this. This walk would be the last moments spent more or less alone in his comp
any and after they supped at Longbourn, it would be the last time she would see him.
Chapter 4 “How could Mr. Bennet have done such a thing?” Mrs. Bennet marched ahead of all of the Bennet girls on their way to Meryton, “To have not told us that he was coming! What a despicably eager fellow this Mr. Collins is, my girls! He’ll have us out of the house by sundown tomorrow.”
The impromptu errand to Meryton had been a necessity owing to the imminent arrival of their distant relation, a Mr. Collins, who required a certain amount of criticism as well as spoiling. He was the relation that was to inherit Longbourn after Mr. Bennet passed and he was assuredly come to feast his eyes upon what would be his. Pride, however, made it necessary for the Bennets to lavish their guest, unwelcome though he was.
Elizabeth was the first to react to her mother’s tirade. “Mama, I’m afraid Mr. Collins will be disappointed to find that father is very well indeed. He need not stay until sundown for he does not stand to inherit yet,” but all was ignored.
“And of course it is on the same day that Bingley will be joining us, to steal all the attention away,” Mrs. Bennet continued.
“Perhaps we should be glad that you only have to worry about one special dinner, Mama,” Kitty offered.
“I would have let Mr. Collins eat from the troughs!”
! ""! When all was said and done, the Bennets had ordered the majority of the finest cuts in the market. Only in Meryton did the news of the impending arrival of Mr. Collins mean excitement. Before that very time the next day, Netherfield and Longbourn would house available bachelors. And somehow, still, Longbourn remained the center of it all.
Before Mr. Collins’ tall figure darkened the Bennets' doorstep, Elizabeth was quite content to believe that there was a chance that he, a well-positioned clergyman, could shed a positive light upon her family in front of Bingley and Darcy. Upon immediately meeting their distant relative, however, she grew more anxious than ever.
“I have long anticipated this meeting, Mr. Bennet,” Mr. Collins said upon gaining an audience with the entire family.