by Lucy Harvey
“Always so sure of yourself Roman, tell me, were you always this forward? Even as a child?” He interrogated.
The irony awakened a demon in the cages of my body. He knew me as a child. He ruined everything about me as a child. I hid my clenching fists under my mahogany desk trying to maintain eye contact with him. Ignoring his taunting games I proceeded with business.
“I am willing to buy into your business and for forty nine percent of your company but I have my rules. We will use my legal team to brief the contracts, any meetings or deals that will be conducted from here on out will be at my say so and more importantly I need to know of every single scandal so I’m at least prepared for the back lash if need be.” It was a proposal I had no business in setting up but a proposal that would undoubtedly benefit me.
Everything about this animal was riddled with evil and lies. Everything he touched turned to stone as he so freely enjoyed the wreckage he created, I knew more than a dozen victims waiting for his downfall. I would be the one successful enough to deliver it. That I promised myself.
“And what if I say you can have every single one of those desires for just thirty percent of the business?” His measly frail hand stroked at his withering grey goatee. He knew I was not one to reconsider or compromise.
“Then I would tell you where to stick it Viktor, like always.” My tightened jaw aligned into a false grin.
I sunk back into my desk chair so that my forearms were now covered by my office desk. My hands were grinding holes in the arms of chair from my torment. Keep calm Roman. Just five more minutes.
“Hmm, I’m sure I could get that daughter of mine to tempt you to change your mind, how is Odette recently?” The sicko would even pawn his own flesh and blood to get what he wanted. Power.
I may not have respected Odette but I only played the hand I was dealt. She made herself available to me that way so why should I change that. But when a man so despicably regards his own offspring for power. I mentally shook my head.
There were two types of men in the world, those who sought power. They craved it, needed it, it was what they lived for. Then there were those who assorted power in all fields, even the ones they had no desire for. Viktor was one type of man and I was the other. There was one thing and one thing only I had in common with this disease of humanity and it was the darkness that ignited our bones.
“I could fill you in on every single dirty little thing she would do to me Viktor, for no purpose other than to feel me inside her.” My statement wiped the smirk from his face. He knew how much of a whore his daughter was without my input, she was her mother’s replicate in every sense.
“Fine. You have got yourself a deal, but Roman, ever speak of Odette like that in my presence and I will kill you.” It was a promise of some sort but he shook my hand and put on his smug grin then finally left my office.
I could breathe again.
Operation destroy Viktor was in motion, he would pay.
“I don’t want a new daddy.” I sobbed. “They’re all horrible and I don’t want another, why can’t it just be me and you?” I clung to Ava as she rocked me back and forward trying to sooth my pleas.
“Oh Rome, you know why it can’t just be me and you, this one will be nice to you I promise. I promise I will do whatever it takes to make sure that he is nice to you.” Her voice was so pretty. Everything about Ava was pretty and I knew she would keep her promises, she always did.
Ava did keep her promise. That new “daddy” was nice to me and for once things were stable until I learnt just why he was so patient with me. Then I discovered Ava was right, he was not like that others at all he was far worse than I could have ever anticipated.
The clock chimed at six thirty. I spent the day trying to busy my mind from thoughts of Viktor or Lily. As some would say I was trapped between a rock and a hard place not wanting to focus on either downfall.
Lily.
I needed to get her out of my head.
I left the office just after seven pm, instead of heading home I ordered my chauffeur to take me to the nearest bar, women were all the same, I would find another Lily to occupy my mind long enough so I could see there was nothing special about her and I would be able to think again.
Entering the bar I scanned the room for anyone blonde - a willing playmate to distract me. To my dismay the majority were blonde and each more willing than the one that stood before them but not one shared the same kind of beauty as her.
Heading straight to the overcrowded bar I made a bee line for an empty space parking my medaling ass on the steel stall.
“I’ll have a Jack Daniels and coke.” I ordered.
“I’ll have the same.” A giggly blonde stated beside me.
The bar tender waited for my nod then proceeded to pour our drinks. I turned my attention to face the brave girl approaching me and studied her from head to toe.
Blonde. Check.
Smiley. Check.
Willing. Check.
Lily. Not check.
If I had any chance convincing myself Lily was just another girl that was unneeded in my life then I needed to fuck this girl. Pound her until I could not remember my own name let alone the reason I needed to do this.
“Would you describe yourself as brave” I teased.
Brushing my hand up the girl’s thigh I watched as her cheeks heated and blushed at my sadistic show of affection. Oh please, another ‘my daddy didn’t love me so I wear short skirts to fuck him off’ kind of girl. That or ‘I recently broke up from my first ever boyfriend and I want to have one night of filth before I crawl back and beg him to love me again’. Either way she would do.
“Is bravery essential for what you have in mind for me?” She teased.
Fuck.
In any other time, in any other situation that would be the desired response. But tonight was different. Tonight I was living in the after math of Lily. Just like how our eras were split into before Christ and after Christ, my life would now be before Lily and after, only no matter what I tried to do it was beginning to seem as though there would never be an after. Just an attempt of survival.
Taking one look at the girl in front of me I dipped my head rubbing the tips of my fingers against my forehead. I was mad for deciding my next move. I downed my Jack Daniels, hers too and made my way for the club exit.
I could not do it.
“Hey where are you going?” The once giggly blonde sprinted after me. Great. A cling on.
“Anywhere out of here honey.” I replied.
“Am I supposed to follow you?” She smirked, she thought this was a game.
“If I were you I would run back to the reason you are here tonight and continue with your PG life. If you try and leave this bar with me tonight I will have my cock so deep in your cunt whilst my fist ploughs your tight little anus that you will be praying to the lord above us you never strayed from the right path you seem to desperate to run from.” I was leant in close with my breathe lingering in the silence between us. I nipped on her lobe and she catapulted out of her frozen state.
“Stay away from me you psycho.” She screamed whilst returning to the unconventional safety of the bar.
Reaching into the pocket of my tight slacks I pulled out my phone attempting to alert my driver that he was needed. A black Audi R8 pulled around the corner and I slid inside.
“Take me to Birkdale Road number 4.” I ordered.
I was going to Lily’s.
The girl that was implanting herself in by being. The resounding image in my mind.
As long as I kept control, as long as I kept my head then just maybe this was a game I was willing to play.
I had spent the night watching reruns of One Tree Hill and numbing myself with copious amounts of wine. I thought that Roman and I were okay, that finally we were getting somewhere. My heart warmed and fluttered as the memory of our date took place in my mind. But I had not heard from him since our fiasco, I knew this would happen. I was beginning to realize he would be the one t
o rip the rug from my feet when I had just found solid ground.
Instead of crying over something I should have prepared for I set about my usual pick me up regime and headed for my stereo. Before pressing play on my oversized retro high-fi system I moved the furniture in my living area to create space. Things were getting serious. Enthusiastically I hit the play button and jumped at the immediate boom of my speakers. ‘Dexy’s midnight runners – Eileen’ cascaded through my living room cooling my state, flowing a channel of calm through the unsteadiness of my anxiety.
I repeated the song over and over dancing around like a careless teenager, my arms and hips were swaying to and fro, in this moment I felt free and alive. I was infinite. My body was racing around in a frantic state at one with my singing mind. I would continue to do this and feel this way until I was so breathless and tired that my mind would be occupied with only how tired I was. A regime I had relied on since a young girl.
Pressing pause on the music player I bent forward clutching at the self-induced ache in my sides whilst my panting became the only sound to fill the empty space around me. Maybe a morning run was not enough to counteract the comfort food I had been binging on all week.
“Do not stop on my account Angel.” That husky cool voice gripped at my senses undoing all my hard work to forget.
“Roman, how did you? Why did you? I mean-” I said through staggered breathes.
I paused trying to collect needed oxygen as I registered his presence. Breathing in and out I was absorbing his poisoned scent securing my interest.
“The door was unlocked, I heard that song and was intrigued, and I never had you down as an 80’s fan.” He goaded.
Roman mastered the ability to go on as though he had not one care in the world but I knew his mind was riddled with worry. I wanted to push and demand the answers I had been craving all day. Who, why, when, where have you been? I knew pressing would just push and all I wanted to do was cling. So I pushed the insecurities to the back of my mind and carried on the conversation. I’ve got this.
“Every body’s an 80’s fan. Plus Eileen’s my happy song.” My breathing had returned to normal and my tone was calm conflicting with the concern within me.
I edged towards the mirror attempting to have a peek at the mess I was. To be fair for someone who had spent the day wallowing in their own self-pity and stench I looked surprisingly presentable.
“Happy song? What do you mean by that?” I thought he was being sarcastic but once I saw the confusion etched up on his face I detected his seriousness.
“Wait, you’re being serious? You don’t have a happy song? It’s my go-to song whenever I feel like it is all too much which seems to be all the time, it makes me feel happy and free. My personal medication I guess, so you don’t have one?” Roman stalked towards me inching closer with every word I spoke.
“In that case I guess it would be ‘The XX – Angels’ I guess that is the closest to happy I have felt in a long time.” He whispered.
Roman cupped my cheek with the palm of his sweaty hand. That was when I noticed the aroma of Jack Daniels lingering on his breathe and the beads of sweat lingering on his brow most likely indicating he had been somewhere with hot sweaty bodies. That’s why he was here. He was drunk. I was merely a mundane afterthought in his alcohol influenced mind.
“Are you drunk?” I questioned, dipping my heavy head to the ground, the disappointment shining through my words.
“You sweet Angel are very cute.” He giggled. Taking his comfortably positioned hand from my face he reached up to wipe away strands of hair covering my lowered head then proceeded to tip my chin so my eyes were staring into his.
“Maybe if I was drunk it would be easier to forget you.” He brushed his lips against mine and the hotness of his breathe felt beautifully toxic. “Maybe if I was drunk I would be too fragile to walk and would keep myself from running to you.” Nipping on the tip of my nose he grabbed my ass and with ferocious desire yanked my hips into his body, reacting to his touch I rolled my body against his growing erection.
“Angel, I am not here because I’m drunk from alcohol and about to make decisions I wouldn’t in a sober state, I am here because I am drunk on every little thing that makes you and every single decision I make from here on out is because I simply can’t forget you, even if I could I do not want to be sober from this anymore.” His tone turned from complementing to stern and I sensed what followed. I was ready for it.
I thought that Roman had wormed his way into my head but the way he spoke so dark and intense it was clear it was I who was threatening his steady grip on life. I was so confused.
“You cannot start to make a habit of this.” I warned him, my head certainly did not need the added wreckage.
“I’m not doing anything Lily it’s you. The way you look and smell. It is you luring me in.” He tried to deviate.
“Roman, you can’t just say you don’t do romance then say the things you say. It’s just not fair.” I tried to escape out of his grip but he held me too tightly.
“Do you want me to leave Angel?”
I did not have chance to calculate the pros and cons for what was about to take place, all I knew was that I wanted Roman. I needed him so bad and if he was about to up and leave after then this would be the sweetest goodbye. So throwing caution to the wind and chucking up my deuces to my conscience I followed him to the bedroom never taking my lips from his skin.
Roman began running his fingers over my frame and started to pull off my loose fitting t-shirt. I stood before him with my breasts completely on show. We stood that way for a while as he gulped at me, the bob of his Adams apple as he swallowed made my nipples pebble under his vision. I liked the way I affected him, I wanted more. Using my own hands I pushed my lady boxer shorts down so I was fully exposed presenting my naked body to him.
This time Roman did not stand and stare at me, he grabbed me by one hand on the nape of my neck and the other pushing against my backside. Instinctively I wrapped my legs around his broad physique as he laid me down on the bed.
“I don’t normally do this Lily but I’ll do it for you.” He whispered between lush kisses making me pant.
“You don’t normally have sex?” I questioned puzzled by what he said.
Roman pulled back and greeted me with a wicked grin followed by a boyish giggle. My already wet pussy was growing moister with every second of being so close to him.
“No Angel.” Roman slowly leaned into me so that the tips of our noses were gently grazing. “I don’t normally have sex with a girl, I ruin her as she answers to every single one of my filthy commands. I push her further than she can physically and mentally go whilst she struggles trying to beg me to stop, the only words fleeing her mouth ‘please sir’.” This time I gulped. “But you Lily, I just need to be inside you, anyway I can.”
I knew I should have taken his confession as a compliment but I did not want him to settle with me. I wanted to be every single fantasy he had. I needed to know all of his upmost desires were fulfilled through me.
“No Roman, I want you to go hard on me.” I admitted taking my trembling lip between my teeth.
Roman had a strikingly surprised countenance as he tried to study my sincerity.
“I don’t want to scare you away.” He confessed placing kisses along my collar bone.
“You won’t, I promise, I am not as innocent as you think Roman.” I tried to encourage him, the longer he hovered above me brushing me with his erection the more sinister my improper thoughts became.
Placing one lush kiss on my eager lips Roman stood off the bed and disappeared into my walk-in wardrobe. When returning he had the rope from my silk dressing gown laced in his hands along with my eye mask. Once returning he regained his position straddling my waist and leant down to possess my mouth.
As my needy tongue swirled with Romans, his dominant mouth began leading me and tasting me as he took both my arms and raised them above my head. Lowering his intoxicating m
outh he took my erected nipple between his teeth playfully tugging and licking. He brought my arms back down and I noticed he had tied my hands together without me realizing.
“I hope you are ready Angel.”
He gave me one last sly smirk before placing the eye mask on my face blocking my view yet igniting my other senses. The thought of being bound with no sight kindled a fear in me. Roman left me to lie soaking in my own panic with the only sounds to be heard were those of my own heavy breathing. I knew he was doing this on purpose.
Roman hooked his forearms under my legs and tossed them over his muscular shoulders. Leaning forward he grazed his nose down the center of my folds. I fisted my hands in his hair trying to force him to touch me. I could hear him groan and laugh at my already wet state as he entered a finger inside me. Using the pad of his thumb he rubbed in circular motions along my throbbing clit. My grip on him tightened as the grip on my composure retorted into nothing.
“Lily you are going to answer my every command. Any thought that enters my mind will be fulfilled through you. You are to view me as your master, everything I do will be for our mutual benefit.” Curling his fingers around my nipple he gently stroked it. “Good girls get pleasured, bad girls get punished.” Then he pinched down and I kicked out from the shock of the sensation. Roman continued to rub my sex and my hips followed his motion, bucking and writhing I became restless with my need to finish. I needed his so bad.
“Fuck me Sir.”
The word felt alien in my mouth as much as I tried to pretend. I wanted to please him, I didn’t want him thinking I was inexperienced nor that he would half to go elsewhere for his full pleasure.
As though I had assaulted him Roman retrieved from his position leaving me spent and wanting.
“Lily fuck, please don’t say that. I don’t want you to be like the others, I want you to want me. Call me Roman.” Wow, his compassionate order choked me from a response. I knew that whole submissive and dominant role - which I could do. But to be regarded as a replaceable submissive was something I could not be comfortable with and he could sense that.