“Yeah…” She nodded and forced herself to move. The short walk to Sin’s cabin, two doors down, happened in a haze. While she never expected him or other shifters not to act if someone was turning information over to the enemy, she also hadn’t expected him to be upfront in telling her he’d kill them if it came down to it. There was something terrifying about that knowledge but the more she thought about it she realized something else also bothered her. The idea that Noah or someone she had gotten to know over the last week could get hurt or killed because of some traitorous asshole made her livid.
She wasn’t sure what kind of person this made her but she accepted what he said. Did that mean she was becoming less of a human being? Were the shifters who had come into her life recently affecting her in a way that she was willing to accept murder might be the only answer? As they stepped into Sin’s cabin and she looked around at the leaders of the tribe, she realized it wasn’t hardness that made her accept things; it was compassion. Compassion for what was happening to shifters. This was war and unfortunately, in war, there would always be fatalities.
“Now that everyone is here, let’s get started.” Jase sat down at the head of the dining table.
“Before you do, I’d like to say something.” She paused next to the chair Noah had led her to.
“Karri.” Noah’s voice held a touch of warning, as if he wasn’t sure what she was going to say.
She wished that she had the same ability as he did to be able to open the connection between them and let him know she wasn’t about to say something careless. Unfortunately, that was a one-way street, which did her no good.
“Go ahead,” Jase encouraged her.
She slipped her hand into Noah’s and allowed herself to let their embrace wash away her nerves. “First, I appreciate the welcome everyone has shown me since Noah brought me here. I was clueless before Noah found me and I appreciate how everyone has taken the time out to answer my questions. I don’t know how I can be of any use to you but I want to help in any way I can. I want to change what is happening although, obviously, this issue is bigger than any one person can manage. A few moments ago, while we were standing outside, I was watching a young girl. She couldn’t be older than seven. I don’t want to see her witness the same thing I did a few days ago, or worse yet, be one of those who didn’t make it. She deserves to be able to do whatever she wants, without looking over her shoulder, wondering if The Saviors or some other lunatics are gunning for her.”
“Hopefully we’ll get to that point. Unfortunately, it won’t happen overnight.” Jase clasped his hands together in front of him on the table.
“Noah said the same thing to me.” She glanced at him before turning back to Jase. “And I do realize that. Hell, it might be something that affects her most of her life, but hopefully, her children and her children’s children will know a different world. I’m just one person and I’m human so I know I have limitations. Still, I want to help.”
“Then help us.” Garret turned the paper over in front of him. Revealing a photograph, he slid it across the table to her. “Do you know this man?”
“That’s…” Her knees turned soft and her breath caught in her throat. As if knowing what she needed, Noah pulled out the chair and eased her into it. As she sat down, she couldn’t pull her gaze from the jailhouse mugshot.
“Who is it?” Noah asked.
“Kat’s father,” she breathed out. Unable to look at it any longer, she reached out to turn the picture over. “I heard him…that night. He was there. Heaven help me! He shot them…”
Noah dropped into the chair beside her and forced her to look at him. “You heard him say something. What did he say?”
“I warned you, daughter, but you wouldn’t listen.” She remembered the way the wind had carried his words toward her and the chill it had sent through her bones from the hatred in his words. “He opened fire and the others followed suit. Why…why would he kill his own daughter? Was she a shifter?”
“No,” Garret answered. “The autopsy report came back yesterday. She wasn’t a shifter, but her boyfriend was. Turns out more than half of the people there were from a wolf pack. The guy who put together the party is from the area. He’s human, but met some of the wolves through college. It was break and he was stuck here so he figured he’d throw a party in the woods, and no one would know.”
“Regrettably, the wrong people found out about it,” Sin added.
“They knew because Kat told her parents we were going. Shit, they knew I was supposed to be there.” Even Noah’s touch did nothing to subside the fear that rose within her. He’d killed his own daughter and there was no doubt in her mind that he’d come after her as well if he could figure out where she was.
“The police arrested him this morning. Here’s the press statement and summary of his charges.” Garret leaned forward, offering her what appeared to be a computer printout.
She read the text before placing the sheet on the table in front of her. “What about Kat’s mother—did she know about this?”
“The police believe she knew nothing but you can’t reach out to her,” Jase told her before eyeing Noah as if giving him a silent message. “Have you spoken with your parents or any family members yet?”
“No.” She focused her attention on the paper in front of her, her finger tracing the edge of the corner repeatedly, embarrassed to look at anyone in the room. “I haven’t spoken much to them or anyone from my hometown in months. Dad was livid I left to go to college instead of working in the family’s grocery store. Mom goes by what he says, so when he cut off communication, it went for everyone, including my younger sister. They know I’m friends with Kat and I’m sure the news reached them by now, yet no one called to see if I was okay. That’s my family.” She shook her head, disgusted by the fact that her family didn’t seem to care if she was alive or dead.
“No, sugar, we are.” Noah scooted his chair closer to hers and took her hand in his. “You’re my mate and we’re family here. That makes you one of us.”
“He’s right.” Jase nodded. “Not to add pressure but you’re going to need to claim her.”
“Excuse me? Claim me? I’m not a lost dog.” She glared at Jase but her words lacked anger. She wanted to lash out at her family for their lack of caring but since she couldn’t do that, she picked the next easy target. Unfortunately for Jase, his comment came at the wrong moment and she couldn’t help letting it all out on him.
“It’s not meant in a disrespectful way,” Sin explained. “Once the mating between the two of you is cemented, it will link you with us permanently. It will also give Noah the connection that will allow him to know where you are at any time.”
“A tracking collar, then.”
Next to her, Noah’s muscles tightened and his body went completely still. His reaction made her realize she was lashing out through embarrassment and fear of what was happening, not because of Noah, the mating, or any objections to the claim. “I apologize, that was out of line. Noah—”
“Don’t.” He pulled his hand out of hers and the loss of touch sent a pang of regret through her.
“Please, Noah.” She started to reach out for him but stopped. “I let my anger speak for me and I’m sorry.”
Jase cleared his throat, forcing her to stop. “This is something you two should work out privately. Right now, we need to wrap this meeting up so Liam can make his appointment. One last thing, Noah, have you picked a First Lieutenant?”
“I plan to meet with Brett Oaks this afternoon about the position.” Noah rose from his chair and stepped away from the table.
Her chest tightened as she watched him put distance between them. Never before had her mouth got her into so much trouble as she was in now. She’d hurt the one person who had been by her side, supporting her, all this time. He claimed she was his mate and while she didn’t completely understand it, she knew there was something between them. It had been Jase’s comment about Noah claiming her that made her unea
sy. This was too close to what her father had done with her mother. At twenty-five, her father met her mother, who’d been seventeen at the time. He’d come into her life and taken control; two days after her eighteenth birthday, they were married.
“Let’s go.” Noah ordered, pulling her from her thoughts of her parents.
“One last thing, Karri.” Jase stopped her before she could go after Noah. “We need you to not answer your phone if anyone calls. Right now, we’re still not sure if The Saviors planned you as a target or not. It’s possible Kat’s father had planned to execute you that night was well. You were a friend of Kat’s and her boyfriend’s and you were also at the party with numerous other shifters. It’s possible they have their sights on you. You’re safe here and right now we don’t believe the police knew you were there. None of the survivors mentioned you. If you were one of the planned victims, your name is not on the list of the dead so they could be watching for you if he told the others about you.”
“You said it yourself, Kat’s parents knew you were going to the party,” Sin added before she could argue. “Right now, this is just out of precaution.”
“Whatever, my phone is almost dead anyways.” She pushed back from the table and quickly hurried after Noah who had already started for the door. She didn’t care about being cut off from anyone outside of the tribe. Her parents obviously didn’t care and the only friend she’d been close to was now dead. What she cared about was Noah, and he’d just walked out on her. Somehow she needed to make him understand where she was coming from. Speaking out of anger might have been one of the worse things she could have done but she’d be damned if she allowed her anger to cost her his love. I’ve already lost so much; I’m not going to lose him, too.
Chapter Six
Outside, Karri followed Noah, mentally preparing herself for what she expected would be a fight. The short distance between the cabins seemed to take longer than before, until finally they were far enough away from Sin’s place that they wouldn’t be overheard—or so she hoped. It didn’t matter because she needed to make things right with Noah before he went inside and back to work. “Noah, stop for a minute, please.”
“According to what you said in there, I’m the one who’s supposed to be giving the commands,” he snapped without turning to look at her. The anger in his voice didn’t surprise her but the pain his words caused in her chest did.
“That’s not what I meant. It came out wrong.” She let out a deep sigh and stepped back from him. “No, maybe it didn’t come out wrong; maybe I said what I thought I meant, but I was wrong.”
“How could you compare yourself to a stray dog? Do you really think you mean that little to me?” Anger and sorrow mixed into his tone.
“During my senior year of high school I had to put this project together and to add a personal aspect I decided to include some family photos. I was looking through an old photo album when my mother came home from work. This album was hidden behind some things and you could tell it was old from the yellowing on the page and the warn material that Mom used to cover it. Inside I found pictures of her and her family. She was smiling and happy. Do you know I can’t remember a single day when my mother looked as happy as she did in the photographs?”
“What does that have to do with now?”
She glanced around the grounds, taking in those who were around, especially the family gathered at the picnic table sharing lunch. Yet another thing she’d had never done with her folks. It wasn’t until she’d left home that she realized how unusual her family really was. “That’s how things were with my parents. He barked and she’d cower in fear or run off to do whatever would make him happy. For a long time, I thought it was normal and it took me nearly two years to realize it wasn’t. I don’t want that for myself.”
“Have I ever ordered you around? Forced you to do something you didn’t want to do? I didn’t even force you to come back here with me even though I knew it would be the safest place for you.”
“I know.” She turned back to him. “But sitting there having Jase tell me that you need to claim me made it seem like a demand. It seemed like either complete the mating or leave. It was a shock and I reacted without thinking. I don’t want to be stuck in a relationship like my mother was. She might love my father but no man is worth being a doormat for.”
“And you think I’ll treat you like one.” He leaned his hip against the handrail leading up the stairs to the porch of his cabin and watched her. There was no question in his statement, leaving her for a moment unsure of what to say.
“No.” She closed the distance between them to stand in front of him. “I’ll be honest and admit I’m concerned about this relationship. What can I contribute to it? I don’t want it to be something that developed because some lunatics are after me and I need your help to stay alive.”
“That’s not what’s happening here and if you thought about this for a minute, you’d know that.”
She already knew this of course but hadn’t wanted to accept it. This wasn’t what she’d thought it would be like. She always imagined they’d meet, date, and then have this connection. With Noah, the connection was instant and this attraction to him seem almost magical.
“What’s the problem, Karri? Is it that I’m a shifter?”
Glancing back up at him, she was met with his amber lion eyes, reminding her of the lion she’d petted days ago. If being a shifter had any impact on her feelings for him, it certainly wasn’t a negative one. She was intrigued by his second nature. Any hold back on her part was from her wanting a relationship where she was an equal and not something like her parents had. She wasn’t willing to settle for anything less. As she’d only known him a short time, she couldn’t yet accept that she wouldn’t end up in a situation that replicated her mother’s. He didn’t seem like that type of guy but if she didn’t take her time, she might find out she was wrong too late.
“No.” She brought her gaze to meet his as she tried to put her uncertainties into words. “You have to understand this idea of being claimed because you believe I’m your mate is new to me. Where I come from, it doesn’t happen like that. Upon meeting you, you told me I was your mate and I’ve been trying to adjust to that but it won’t happen overnight. What you’re talking about is a lifetime together because of this mating, but I barely know you. What if once we know each other better we find out that we don’t like each other? Then what? For shifter mates, there are no divorces, so does that mean we’re stuck together? Do you really want to live miserably for the rest of your life?”
“We’re a perfect match.”
“Who says?” Feeling overwhelmed, she took a step back from him. “Your lion?”
“Fate. What’s happening here is similar to what two humans would experience with love at first sight. The connection seems instant, like they’ve known each other their whole lives, and neither of them wants to spend a day apart from the other. Are you denying you feel that way?”
Part of her wanted to be able to tell him she didn’t, but it would be a lie. The connection was there and stronger than anything she’d felt before. Maybe that scared her the most. She wanted what he was offering but fear plagued her. Did she want him too badly? Since they’d met, she found herself constantly seeking him out. Whether it was a moment of his time as she brought him fresh coffee while he was working, or the cuddling on the sofa in the evenings, those meant everything to her. Even asleep, her subconscious put him in her dreams, as well as her nightmares. It didn’t matter if she was back in the woods surrounded by blood and gore, or there at Crimson Hollow—Noah was there, with her.
“I feel it,” she admitted. “I’m just scared.”
“Letting fear hold you back from what life has to offer is like going on a roller coaster and keeping your eyes closed the whole time. It’s the adventure you don’t want to miss—not how you got there. We have our whole lives to live and I want to do it with you.”
When he put it like that, it sounded amazing. She wa
s a risk taker; otherwise she’d have never left home to make her own path in life. Why was she letting fear hold her back from something she wanted now? She didn’t know but her best guess would be all the unknowns. After her near death experience, she should be grabbing life with both hands.
“I know you’re right but…” Exhaling, she dragged her hand through her hair. “It’s hard to explain everything I’m thinking and feeling. Does that connection of yours do anything useful?”
“Such as?”
“I don’t know. I mean if you can know where I am, can’t you use it to feel my emotions? Maybe feeling them would allow you to better understand why I’m holding back.”
He straightened himself from where he was leaning on the porch railing and tipped his head toward the house. “Let’s go inside and finish this conversation.”
“Noah…” Unsure if going inside was the best move, she called after him. If they made it inside, would he be tempted to go up and sulk in his office? They needed to get through this before it brewed strong, causing hatred.
“Inside.” His tone held command, leaving no question that he expected her to follow. “There are too many people around to be having this conversation outdoors.” Without waiting for her, he went to the front door and held it open.
She glanced around her; more of the tribe members seemed to be milling about now. They hadn’t even registered to her; all she’d thought about was Noah and making things right between them. This tension between them was like a brick in her stomach. Was this because of the connection they shared or her own emotions? Not wanting to question this, she followed him. Whatever was happening between them would continue to happen. He had explained the mating connection would continue to grow until he claimed her and that would be the final piece needed to light the circuit between them completely. Once lit, it would never be extinguished, becoming a connection far beyond what humans shared.
Inside, she dropped down onto the chair and waited. She needed to see what he would do. Would he rush back to his office or would he stay and fight? There was something to be said about staying and fighting and while she expected he would, she knew he also had work waiting for him. The Saviors’ attack in the woods had been the first large scale attack against them but everyone suspected it wouldn’t be the last. Noah and the others were digging into every possible avenue and since Kat’s father was a part of the big picture, that meant tearing apart Kat’s family. How many others did she know who were part of this war on shifters?
Purrable Lion: A Crimson Hollow Novella Page 5