by Anna Howard
"She like, jumped on me! Like some crazy rabid dog or something. I was like, "Dude, what the heck?" And she cussed me out! Then she started pulling my hair and hitting me! But she hit like a girl. Well, I wasn't going to just stand there while she hit me, so I hit her back. Soon we were in an all-out brawl! You could barely tell just from looking at me, but she looks way worse I swear. Eventually the chick working there called security and they came and split us up. Ugh, I didn't even get the dress! They kicked us out and threatened to call the cops! But I mean, you know, it wasn't a big deal."
I was flushed and smiling from ear to ear when I was finished fabricating my cover story. Ok, so it wasn't exactly super realistic, so what? Besides, everything in High School is exaggerated. And I did do a pretty good job considering I made it up on the spot.
Elizabeth's eyes widened as she inspected my battle scars with new wonder. She cussed under her breath and smiled back at me. "Wow, I mean, just, wow. Like, that is so cool! Can I, like, take your picture or something?" At first I thought that was a little strange, but she does do a column in the school newspaper, at least I think. As if I ever read that thing…
I put on my best brave face while she took the picture with a small black camera, and laughed while she hustled away, stuffing the camera in her bag and yanking out her phone, her fingers working as fast as lightning. Oh, this story will definitely get around. Unfortunately, most people didn't know yet, so I got plenty of wide-eyed stares as I walked down the hallway. I shrugged them off and smiled at everyone I knew, (which was almost everyone).
"Holy shit! What happened to you?" Lyssa asked when she saw me. My smile faded a little, she always knows when I'm lying.
"Haven't you heard yet? Well, I'll just tell you anyway. I got in a fight." I opened my locker and hid my face behind the door.
"Oh come on, you act so tough but we know you couldn't hurt a fly." Amber said, coming out of nowhere. Lyssa and she stood shoulder to shoulder, blocking my way.
"Okay, so maybe I didn't get in a fight. But no one else knows that!" I whisper/yelled.
"Ugh, whatever," Lyssa grumbled as the bell rang, "But you will tell us what happened at lunch!" She snatched Josh from the hall where he was talking with his friends and strode off, hips swaying in classic Lyssa-walk and causing Josh's friends to whistle at her.
"Are you ok?" Amber asked, stopping me from walking away by touching my arm lightly. Her light brown eyes were concerned, though if you weren't her best friend you would be able to see through her easy-going façade.
"Um, yeah. Really, I'm ok. Don't worry about it." I smiled at her and walked away before she could decipher whether I was lying.
I decided to skip first period, it's only floral design class and we're just taking notes today. Besides, it would allow the gossipers in that class to talk freely about me without me physically being there. I spent the morning in the restroom, well, gagging myself. You can't blame me though! I spent all of yesterday and the day before moping. Ok, actually on Saturday Trevor and I walked around a little, but I also ate ice cream. I hadn't had time to work it off yet.
Ugh, I forgot how awful it feels to purge. Never again. I promised myself, clutching my stomach, which was still bruised, in case you had forgotten. I wiped my mouth and flushed the toilet. When I walked out, I was greeted with 2 big, familiar green eyes. That girl from the ice-cream vendor… just heard me make myself throw up.
"Wow, are you ok?" She asked.
"Ha, yeah. I got kicked pretty hard in the stomach, I guess it's just now coming back to me." I shrugged. She gasped.
"Who kicked you?"
"Oh, didn't you hear? I got in a fight, that's how I got this sexy bruise," I regretted the words as soon as they were out of my mouth. I remembered I had told her I ran into a door! Oh no. No, no, no. This could be very bad. I had to convince her not to tell anyone. She had to have been a freshman, so she was naïve. She would believe me if I said the right words.
"Right, I told you I ran into a door, didn't I?" I said, glancing at her through the mirror. She nodded. "Eh, well, that was just a cover story. I mean, you don't normally tell random people you got in a fight with someone. And you look a lot younger, I wouldn't pin you for a high schooler. At any rate, I never actually ran into a wall or door or whatever I told you."
She nodded again, smiling a little. I smiled back. "What class do you have right now?"
"Floral Design, I think, we um, have that class together."
"Oh yeah? Huh, I never noticed. Have you been in there yet?" I asked, glancing at her bag. She shook her head, and I grinned. "Well then, wanna ditch with me?"
Her eyes got even bigger than they already were. "Ditch? It that even allowed?"
I laughed. "Of course not! But neither is being late, technically. Come on, we'll get a frappuccino or something." I held the door open for her and she tentatively walked out. I led her to my car, pulling out my phone and pretending to do something useful on it so the awkward silence falling between us was slightly less awkward.
"This is your car?" She exclaimed when I got in.
"Ha, yeah. Who else's would you expect it to be?"
"Um, good point." We laughed and she got in carefully.
"So what's your name little freshman?" I asked, pulling out.
She looked surprised that I knew she was a freshman, but didn't comment on it. "My name is Lilly, and yours is Ariana, right?"
"Very good." We made small talk until I got to Starbucks. Inside I ordered a caramel macchiato and poor Lilly looked so confused, so I just ordered one of the same for her, too.
We drank our coffees quietly for a minute. Then Lilly spoke, "So, in the bathroom, you weren't uh, making yourself throw up, were you?" She asked.
For a quiet little freshman, this girl was pretty bold.
"I told you, I got kicked in the stomach." I stated without looking at her.
"Yeah, but that doesn't make people throw up, if they are kicked in the stomach. Especially a few days after it actually happened."
"Chill girl, so I wasn't feeling well? Don't go spreading it around." This seemed to finally shut her up, and she became her quiet self once again. "Okay, first is almost over. You wanna head back now?"
"Oh my gosh, really? Crap, I am so dead! My parents are gonna kill me!" She groaned.
I pulled out a slip of paper and a pen and scrawled a quick note, Please excuse Lily "Hey, what's your last name?" Wess for being tardy. "What's your mom's name?" ~Sally Wess and signed it. "Here, problem solved!" I smiled at her. She smiled widely back and followed me to my car. After dropping her off, I didn't feel like staying, so i wandered aimlessly.
I ended up at some random gas station, I think it was a 7-11. Inside I found some cheap sunglasses that would cover most of the bruise on my face. I bought it and a couple packs of gum, because I found I was all out when I purged.
Hey baby, what class are you in? I texted Austin. He had called and texted me several times over the weekend, none of which I answered. There were eight unread voice messages in my phone as well, none of which I listened to.
im in ellisons, y? I really hate text language. I didn't text him back, just drove up to the college he attended and asked around until someone was able to direct me to Ellison's room. I peeked in the doorway and saw him sitting straight up near the front of the room, listening intently like the good boy that he is.
How do I get him out without causing too much attention? You can't just leave during the middle of a lecture. A girl walked down the hallway, and I called out to her. After telling her my plan, she took the 20 dollars I handed her gratefully and threw open the door of Ellison's room.
"Excuse me? Excuse me! I need Austin Skye! Please sir, it's an emergency! Austin Skye, come here! Please! It's urgent!" Then she ran out, giving me a wide smile over her shoulder.
Austin bolted out the door a few seconds later, panting. I grinned at him and put my arms around his neck. He looked around frantically, confused, and then seemed to real
ize what I did. He grinned and lifted me up, twirling me. I giggled and he set me down.
"Babe! What?" He couldn't even form a sentence, how endearing.
"I just figured you needed to get out for a minute," I grinned, hugging him again and pecking him lightly on the lips.
"Well then let's go!" He grabbed my hand and pulled me outside. We didn't actually go anywhere, though. We sat in my car and… talked.
"I called you," he said.
"I know."
"Why didn't you answer?"
"I don't know." We were silent. I hadn't planned on talking.
"Listen, you don't need to—holy crap!" He seemed to notice for the first time the cut on my lips and the bruise peeking out from behind my glasses. "What happened?!"
"Oh uh, well, um. I got in a fight?" I squeaked, making it a question.
"You're dad did this, didn't he?" He groaned, putting his face in his hands. "I shouldn't have left! I'm so sorry babe! I just, I didn't think he would actually hurt you! I just thought… I was a coward. I'm so sorry Ariana, are you ok? How can I ever make it up to you?"
"Hey, don't worry about it. I'm fine. Can you just, not tell anyone? I've been saying I got in a fight. You gotta admit, it sounds a lot better than 'my dad hit me'". I added when he frowned at me.
Austin sighed. "I won't tell anyone. But I don't think it's a good idea to lie about it, it's wrong morally, yes, but you should probably get some help about this, don't you think?"
"Yeah, probably. Just, not yet. Ok? Let me do it, please," I begged.
"Ok, fine. Um, I love you."
Again with the I love you. I had the whole weekend to think about what I could say to him but I haven't. "Um…"
"You don't need to say it back! I just want you to know. I love you." He smiled tentatively at me. I smiled back.
"Let's go do something, shall we?"
Chapter 12 - Last Night
Austin and I ended up just going on a walk, and funny enough, we walked through that same park Trevor and I walked through the other day. I couldn't help but recall that day and compare it to this one. As he talked, I let my mind wander, drifting back to the night before, when I had shown up at Trevor's house unexpectedly, hoping with all my might that his mother wouldn't see me again.
"Are you sure you don't just want to go home?" Trevor asked, concerned.
"Definitely sure. There is no way I will go back there tonight. My dad would kill me! How am I supposed to explain another bruise? Thank goodness people believed the story about the fight, but what now, I got in another fight? No, people will get curious. And I won't be able to come up with yet another excuse for the beating he'd give me if I went back tonight. Can't I just stay with you one more night? Please Trev?" I was ready to get down on my knees, but he held the door open and gestured for me to come inside.
I hugged him tight on the way in and glanced around nervously for his mother.
"Where did you go this morning? I woke up and you were gone." I had left because his mother asked me to, then she stayed with him on the couch. She must have left before he woke up…
"Um, I just didn't want to intrude…" I shrugged. Why wasn't I telling him about his mother? Well, I guessed if she hadn't told him, it wasn't my place to, either.
"Oh but now you don't care?" He snarked.
"Ok, fine. I left because your mother asked me to, while you were asleep. Happy?"
He didn't say anything for a minute. "My mother… talked to you? As in, she actually said… words to you?"
"Um, yeah. She did…" His face was blank. He stared blankly ahead, I waved my hand in front of his face. "Hey, uh, she only said a few words, she just asked who I was and then told me to get out. When I left she was sitting by you."
"Yeah, ok, but… she actually said those things to you?" He slumped on the couch and held his face in his hands.
I sat beside him, taking his hand in mine. "What's wrong with that?"
"Nothing, I guess. I just… can't believe she actually…" Trevor trailed off and looked at me with wide eyes. "Don't you get what that means? That means she's… and I thought… Wow. Ari, you actually got her to talk!" He turned to me and grabbed both my hands. A grin stretched across his face, making him seem a lot younger than he had a few seconds ago.
"Yeah, well, I don't think she was very happy about it." I frowned, had she really been so catatonic that he would act like this when she spoke to me?
"I don't really care right now, but Ari, she talked to you! The last time I heard her voice must have been… oh, I don't even know. Too long. Let's go up there right now, I bet she will talk to you again!" He pulled me up and raced to the stairs, dragging me along like a rag doll. Copper followed behind, yipping excitedly.
"I don't know that this is a good idea, I mean, she didn't seem to like me at all!" I groaned, but he pulled me toward her door anyway.
"Ariana, hey, did you hear what I said?" Austin asked, snapping me out of my trance.
"Oh, I'm sorry, what?"
"I asked if you wanted any ice cream?"
The same girl, Lilly Wess, was still operating the little ice cream vendor Trevor and I went to together not too long ago. I shook my head and smiled at him, taking his hand and steering him away.
"Uh, ok. So anyway, then I was gonna go talk to her and she was all…"
Trevor pushed open the door gently, revealing the same picture I had seen the first time I was here. She sat unmoving on the bed, watching the static-y TV but without really seeing anything. Her glazed-over eyes glanced over at us and back to the TV, and back to us, or more specifically, me.
"I thought I told you to leave," she whispered, narrowing her eyes.
Trevor squeezed my hand tighter, and smiled like a five year-old on the 4th of July. "Mom, this is my friend, Ariana Luke, you met her before, remember?" he took a tentative step forward, "She's going to stay here for the night, because she can't go home right now. Don't worry, we won't do anything."
Miss Rushton got up, and walked slowly to us on tiny legs. She stopped 2 feet away from me and pointed a knobby finger at my face. "You be good to my son, do you hear me? Don't you ever do anything to hurt him, or I will… I will…"
"Mom…" Trevor whispered, and hugged her, pulling her away from me carefully. Tears streamed down his face as he held her tight, and she hugged him back, closing her eyes.
I shouldn't be here, I thought. I should leave. And so I did, shutting the door quietly behind me. I picked up Copper and carried her downstairs, plopping her on the couch while I picked out a movie from the collection in the cabinet under the TV.
I put in A Walk to Remember and curled up on the couch with Copper. After a few minutes Trevor came down, still smiling broadly. His grin faded when he saw the tears on my face.
"Ari, what's wrong?" he asked and rushed to sit beside me, pulling me into a hug and laying down so that I was laying with him. It didn't feel weird, it felt… right.
"Nothing, it's just this movie always makes me cry," I lied, and smiled up at him before laying back down and hiding the fresh tears springing in my eyes.
Austin held me back, pulling me into a hug.
"What the?" I muttered into his shoulder. The flash of a camera snapped behind me and Austin let me go. "Why did you?..."
A little girl, probably still in middle school, held a camera to us so we could see the picture she just took of us. It looked natural enough, probably because you wouldn't see my face. Austin complemented her and she thanked him about 50 times and then ran off.
"She needed it for a photography class," he explained. "She asked you if she could and you just kinda nodded. You seem a little distracted, are you ok?"
"Huh? Oh, uh, yeah. I'm – I'm fine, I'm just a little tired I guess…"
I must have been dreaming, I was still laying beside Trevor on the couch. I was curled up to his chest and the movie was still playing, though I was almost positive I had watched it until the end to fall asleep… I definitely had to have been dreami
ng. And because this was a dream, I had no shame, really, I could say or do whatever I wanted to.
"Hey Trevor, if you could go anywhere, where would you go?" I asked him. For a moment he stayed silent, and I almost thought he was asleep. But this was my dream, he couldn't be asleep in my own dream. Then he shifted slightly and sighed.
"Probably… Japan. I would want to go to Japan."
"Why?"
Again he paused. "I don't really know, I just think it would be cool. What about you?"
"Texas," I whispered.
"Texas? Why Texas? It isn't too far, and you're pretty much filthy rich anyway, so why haven't you already?"
"I guess I just never had the time, or will. I've always wanted to go there because my parents were married there," it was only a dream, so I figured, why not tell him all of this? "That's where they met, too. It was love at first sight. She grew up there, in a small town down south. Then she came up to see the city the same day my father, from Phoenix, went down to see the city. They met at a park and stayed together the rest of their vacations.
"Eventually they lost touch, until one day he went down again with his girlfriend and saw my mother again. Then of course he broke up with his girlfriend to be with mom, and they got married in the nearest chapel. My mother might even be there now… in Texas. I would like to see her again, I haven't seen or heard from her since the day she left six years ago." When I finished I wasn't crying or anything I thought I would be if I ever talked about my mother. I didn't sob and throw myself at dream-Trevor. But it felt weird to say these things out loud, because I never had before, and now here I was, spilling everything to him.
"Your mother left you? And you haven't seen her since then?" He asked, hardly breathing.
"Yeah," I said, and yawned. And then I reached up and kissed him on the cheek. After all, it was only a dream.