"Hey, look out!" came a voice in Botaran. Amshat was still clambering out of the mud. Tiri was at the edge of the mud pool trying to help him without getting muddy herself, but turned to see a bright red globe coming in her direction. It hit her midsection, splattering her with red paint and throwing her off-balance just enough so that she fell backwards into the mud just as Amshat was climbing out.
"Whoops!" said Toben, although he was grinning. "Sor-ry! Got the wrong one!" Then he aimed the bazooka-like device he was carrying at Davy and fired again. Davy was instantly splattered with blue paint and made a huge production out of being stunned and knocked into the mud, apparently unconscious, and trying not to giggle.
Toben dropped the device and ran back the way he'd come.
"Am…" said Tiri, dragging herself out of the mud and feeling both miserable and defeated.
Amshat remained furious. "This ends right now!" He charged after the fleeing Toben.
Once he emerged from he woods, he could see that all three boys were together once again, and were trying to take refuge in a ridiculously primitive structure that had been placed in a large plant. He smiled to himself. They were trapped. And after what he'd endured this day, he'd gladly haul all three of them off to the Procyon Institute personally.
He started to climb the tree, and reached the entrance to the odd structure just in time to see Keyro and Toben bail out of a window, but Jahv was still inside. Amshat lurched forward and caught his son by the heel. "All right, boy, I've got you now, and the other two will certainly surrender after this. Enough is enough!"
Then the floor creaked. And started to crack. And the entire structure lurched. And Amshat was so surprised that he let go of Jahv's foot, allowing the boy to follow his friend and brother out the window. The floor suddenly gave out under Amshat, and he fell to the ground — almost.
At the last instant, Keyro and Toben had moved a kid-size pool into position under what they'd calculated was the weakest spot in the floor of the treehouse. The pool had been used years ago by Davy, of course. It was now filled with shaving cream, paint, mud, maple syrup, half-melted Jello, a half-dozen eggs, chocokate cake frosting, a half-gallon of sour milk, and one air mattress at the bottom to cushion Amshat's landing.
Tiri came walking up, looking miserable, and then she saw Amshat, who was stunned but basically unhurt, and he looked even more miserable. The boys were standing nearby, but not so close that they couldn't take off running again if they needed to.
"You were saying 'enough is enough'?" remarked Jahv.
Amshat tried to wipe his eyes clear of the awful gunk he was plastered with. He stared at his son. "Were we really THAT terrible to you? That you had to do this?"
Jahv and Keyro felt a brief pang of guilt. "Maybe not," said Jahv. "But what you WOULD'VE done to us if you'd taken us back — that would've been that terrible."
"And you didn't seem interested in talking about it when we saw your interviews on GNN," added Keyro.
"Let's face it — you're more interested in getting your business license back than us." said Jahv coldly.
Amshat pulled himself out of the goop-filled pool and stood as straight as possible, trying for some measure of dignity — and not succeeding especially well. He managed a trace of the anger he'd been feeling almost since their arrival on this backwater world. "Tiri — the Infopad." His wife handed him the device. "We wanted you back as proper members of Botaran society. But this — THIS! You leave us no choice, if this is the choice you've made for yourselves. Jahv and Keyro, you are NO LONGER our sons! This is your copy of a legal document. You may no longer use the family title. You are banished from the homeworld forever. I have never, in my entire life, seen such disgraceful Botarans, or experienced such an utter level of — of — I don't even know what to call what you've done today. Tiri — the other Infopad."
Tiri handed another device to her husband. Her face was as impassive as Amshat's was angry.
"Toben — your family feels the same. If you were unwilling, unable, or simply in no condition to return home and accept proper discipline, you also are cut off from your family. Here is your copy of the document. I am certain that your aunt will agree with our decision."
"Prob'ly so." replied Toben.
Without a further word, Amshat activated a device and the two adult Botarans vanished in a burst of light and sound.
"Uh, huh. I figured as much," said Jahv, studying the document he'd been given. "Disowning us gets them their business license back. Either way, they win, whether they'd've carted us off to the Procyon Institute, or disowned us."
Davy came out of the woods, covered with mud and dragging Toben's paint-sphere firing device with him. "Are they gone?"
"Let's find out," said Jahv. He fished around in a shirt pocket for a small comm-unit. "Hey, Arion. You tracking the ship?"
"Are you kidding?" said Arion, who had remained indoors to keep track of the ship. "It hit hyperspace ten seconds after it broke orbit. I'd say your stunt worked, but what the heck all did you say or do to them?"
"Toben farted, for one thing!" announced Keyro.
"Oh, well, that explains it." said Arion. "Thank you so much for sharing that. See you when you get back here."
"Well, it all worked." said Jahv, as the three aliens and Davy started walking back towards the house. Mr. and Mrs. Caulfield had emerged and were standing on the back porch. "Not bad given the limited technology we had to work with."
"It's still sort of — final, y'know?" said Keyro. "I mean, not that I wanted to go back, not that I ever thought we'd be welcome, but now — we really can't."
"Boys, you're part of our family now," said Mrs. Caulfield in a reassuring tone. Then she looked at her husband. "Isn't that right?"
"Right, of course." said Mr. Caulfield, managing to sound sincere despite being caught off guard. "But we do try to be a reasonably clean family most of the time, so I think we'd both appreciate it if the four of you headed upstairs, along the path of newspaper I set down, put your clothes in the plastic bag just outside the bathroom, and get in the shower. And try not to leave the shower looking like you do now, okay?"
The boys all giggled, and carefully made their way upstairs. They shed their clothes and placed them in the plastic trash bag that was left hanging on the doorknob. Unknown to the adult Caulfields, but perhaps not entirely unexpected, all four boys managed to climb into the decently large shower enclosure together, and spent a generous amount of time making sure every last bit of mud and paint was washed thoroughly from their bodies, and then gave the shower enclosure itself a proper cleaning. It was, obviously, great fun for all involved. Even Toben.
After wrapping large towels around themselves which had been provided for them, they headed downstairs for a much more civilized breakfast, which Arion and even Morik joined them for. And gradually, the young Botarans got used to the fact that, truly, Earth was their home now.
As for the potted plant that Keyro peed into, Mrs. Caulfield never did understand why it suddenly grew over ten inches in height over the next two weeks…
Part 13
It was another one of those miserably hot days that the summer had been producing of late, and all Niklas could really think of was to go swimming in the pond near Davy's property. Somehow, that water always managed to stay cool.
The only risk, he acknowledged, was Jahv and the other aliens. Niklas liked them all very much, especially Jahv, who was one of the coolest kids he knew. But somehow, there always seemed to be trouble whenever he got together with them. Jahv was always up to some new invention or some such, and it never quite worked as expected.
Niklas understood that the aliens were probably a little bored here, even if they wouldn't admit it. Their activities were confined to a very small area, and there just wasn't a lot for them to do. Still, it would be nice if just once, they could all get together and not end up in some sort of crazy adventure.
By the time Niklas had reached Davy's home, he'd tied his shirt o
ff on the handlebars of his bike, and was still very hot and sweaty. He smoothed back his hair a little bit and rang the doorbell. Mrs. Caulfield answered the door. "Um, hi," said Niklas, smiling politely. "Davy home?"
Mrs. Caulfield smiled. She liked whenever one or more of the boys that Davy had encountered some time ago came to visit. She knew her son didn't have a lot of friends just in the neighborhood. Actually, he didn't have any. There didn't seem to be a lot of kids around at all, at least none Davy's age. "Goodness, dear, you're soaked. Come in. Davy said you planned to come over today. Do you want a drink of water?"
"No, thanks," said Niklas. "Davy and I want to go swimming in the pond in the woods. I can cool off there."
"Well, all right, but be careful out there." said Mrs. Caulfield, walking over to the stairs. "Davy? Niklas is here!"
Davy came bounding downstairs seconds later, dressed only in the overalls he customarily wore. Niklas wondered how many pairs of these Davy owned, or if he just wore the one until it smelled so badly that he washed it. Davy took one look at the sweat-drenched Niklas and giggled. "Pond?" he asked.
"Pond." Niklas replied, and both boys were out the door.
The boys headed around the back. "Jahv said he'd like to join us," said Davy. "I hope that's okay."
"As long as he doesn't bring any of his inventions along," said Niklas, grinning but also meaning what he said. Niklas looked forward to spending time with both Davy and Jahv. He just didn't want anything blowing up in the process. "What about the others?"
Davy shrugged. "Keyro prefers the mud. I'm not entirely sure Toben and Arion know how to swim. And Morik is who-knows-where."
The boys found the concealed home of the aliens. It wasn't hard if you knew where it was. Davy commented that the door aligned perfectly with a small flowering bush, the only one of its kind, that was at the edge of the woods. Sure enough, the doorway was right there. "Hey, Jahv!" Davy called as the two boys walked in.
The naked green alien boy looked over. Apparently he'd been doing nothing more potentially hazardous than watching television. At first Niklas thought that it was "Gilligan's Island", until he realized that the entire cast had blue skin, and most of the plant life was purple. Nor were the people on the show speaking English or any other language Niklas had ever heard. "What the —?!"
Jahv grinned. "One consequence of media signals like radio and television traveling throughout the cosmos is that sometimes, another planet will get the idea to duplicate certain programming."
"Yeah, but THAT!?" replied Niklas.
"I didn't say there was any accounting for taste." added Jahv.
"But you were still watching it." giggled Davy. "I wonder what they make of Star Trek out there?"
"They wonder how you were able to hire Cardassians for the show." said Jahv. Davy's and Niklas' eyes went wide, and Jahv finally laughed. "Kidding, guys. I am trying to develop a sense of humor."
"Okay, that wasn't bad." said Niklas, sighing in relief.
"Besides, it's Andorians." added Jahv.
"Leave it to you to root for the ones with the antennae," said Davy. "Come on, let's get wet."
The three boys raced into the woods towards the pond, Davy and Niklas working up more of a sweat in the process. Jahv was able to control his perspiration, but he still looked a little winded when they arrived minutes later. The water was clear and looked very inviting.
Jahv was already naked, and Davy and Niklas were so hot, and the pond secluded enough, that neither boy hesitated in removing every stitch of clothing before heading in. What resulted seconds later was a rousing session of good-natured splashing around and a lot of yelling with delight and relief at finally cooling off. When this finally settled down a bit, three boys were standing in almost waist-deep water, totally soaked and giggling like lunatics.
"That felt good!" proclaimed Niklas loudly. "I needed that!"
"It was — refreshing." said Jahv in a calmer tone.
"'Refreshing'?" exclaimed Davy. "That the best you can do? Niklas, I don't think this alien has gotten soaked enough if that's all he can say about it!"
"I think you're right." grinned Niklas.
"May I remind you two that I have the equivalent strength of three of your kind?" warned Jahv, but he was smiling. "And there's only two of you."
"Strength's only good if you're good at using it." countered Davy. "Come on, Niklas, let's get him!"
Jahv gave it a noble effort, but he wasn't used to fighting at all, let alone in water. The very wet wresting match was pretty much even, and really only served to soak the boys that much more and ultimately tire them out. Finally, they simply opted to quietly float and swim for a time before heading back to the grassy shore to dry off for a while.
The three boys lay in the cool grass, not saying anything, for several long minutes. Then, inexplicably, Jahv sat up and stared at the pond.
"Ready for another go at the pond?" asked Davy.
"No, I am content here for the moment," answered Jahv. "It's just — I was remembering. That's where I first appeared on your world. And it was the two of you that rescued me. The shock of such a long transport had stunned me, and I could not swim. I would've drowned if it hadn't been for the two of you. I'm not sure I ever thanked you for that."
Davy looked pensive. "I should thank you. You became such a good friend so quickly. I — had a really good friend here, but he had to move away. I never thought I'd have another friend. Then Keith and Martin turned up, and then you showed up not too long after that." Davy paused. "I hate being lonely."
"I fully expected to be." said Jahv. "I had no idea where I was going. Just that I had to get away. I set the transmat controls to find a habitable world at the farthest reach of its range. I didn't specify that it had to be inhabited, only that I could live on it. Then I met you two."
"I guess I'm the lucky one here," said Niklas. "Jason and Fabian don't live too far from me. You're the most distant, actually, Davy, but it's worth it to come out here, and not just for the pond and the aliens."
Davy smiled. "Thanks. But what did bring you out here that first time, Niklas? I mean, I'm glad you came, but…"
"Martin couldn't stop talking about this really cool kid that he'd met in the woods who had this great treehouse." grinned Niklas.
Davy laughed, but then frowned. "Martin and Keith. Those two came out here not long after we first met. That visit — didn't go too well for a bit. I almost thought I was going to lose their friendship."
"What happened?" asked Jahv. "I mean, if you want to say."
Davy smiled gently. "We got past it. Keith saved me from being hit by a truck when we were picking berries out by the old railroad tracks."
"I wasn't aware those berries were edible!" remarked Jahv.
"Why do you think my mom's pies are always so fresh?" giggled Davy. "Anyway — Keith didn't take too well to how I thanked him."
"Why not?" asked Niklas.
Davy's face reddened. "Well, I guess I can tell you. I kissed him. He didn't like it. Martin talked to him, and we were cool after that but — I dunno, I guess I thought he wouldn't mind. My friend who moved away didn't, so I guess I just thought…
"Did you kiss him on the nose, like Niklas did to me after I pinned him in a fight?" asked Jahv.
"What!?" exclaimed Davy, eyes going wide.
"Jahv!" said Niklas, not too sharply.
"When did this happen!?" asked Davy.
"When we were searching the Dorrian shuttle, just before we found Morik," explained Jahv, while Niklas tried to bury his head in his hands. "It started as a pillow fight, went into a wrestling match. Niklas lost, but for whatever reason kissed me on the nose. It was enough to get me to back off, since I had no idea what he was doing."
"That's what you two were doing while I was listening to Keith gripe about that blue coolant goop he'd gotten doused with!?" sputtered Davy. "He even threw some of it at me. Hold it — you didn't know what a kiss was?"
Jahv shook his head. "I'
d never encountered anything like it."
Then Davy looked at Niklas. "And you — don't mind kissing?"
Niklas grinned. "Not if it's someone I really like."
Davy groaned. "Nobody tells me anything."
"You never asked," said Niklas. "Fabian, Jason and me, and Martin, too, really, have this sort of private club. We've promised to always tell each other the truth, and some other stuff, and we don't worry about hugs and kisses and stuff."
Davy suddenly looked a little miserable, and Niklas couldn't quite figure out why. Then Davy spoke, in a quiet voice. "So — are there any memberships still open in this club of yours?"
Niklas grinned again. He knew where this was leading, and didn't mind. He'd thought for a long time that Davy was a really cute boy. A little goofy sometimes, but cute. "One or two. If you pass the initiation."
Davy faced Niklas with a grin on his own face. "I think I know what that is, and I'm up for it if you are."
The two boys embraced and shared a long kiss. Then they noticed Jahv's antennae twitching. "You did say one or TWO memberships."
Davy and Niklas parted to face Jahv. "Yeah, but you don't even know what a kiss is." said Davy, teasing the alien.
"Didn't," said Jahv. "I do now."
"He's got a point," said Niklas. "But also, to go this long through life without any, really? He's got a lot to make up for, don't you think?"
"I'm sure we can help him in that," said Davy.
Davy and Niklas launched themselves at Jahv, and the result was a good-natured wrestling match that involved a lot of cuddling, tickling, and no shortage of kisses planted on the young Botaran.
Eventually, the three boys went back to the pond for a time, and then returned to shore, where they fell asleep for a few hours, huddled in one warm heap. It was late afternoon when Jahv awoke first, and sat up and sniffed the air. His movement awakened Davy and Niklas. "Wha's up?" asked Davy sleepily.
"Your mother is putting the finishing touches on what smells like an immense and superb meal of seasoned chicken, potatoes, probably mashed, served with butter, and a vegetable side including peas, corn, and carrots."
My Friend is an Alien (niklas and friends) Page 26