by Jason Donald
Dali, where have you been? I have been trying to call you for two days.
I have been here, says Dalila. But the phone didn’t ring. Maybe reception is bad?
Well, it doesn’t matter. Are you okay?
I’m scared, Baba. They will take me tomorrow.
I know. I spoke to Phil. He believes he can stop you getting on the flight. You might have to stay in Yarl’s Wood for a while, but you will be safe.
Dalila quickly answers, saying, I emailed my friend Muthoni. She might be able to meet me at the airport. Then I will go to Lamu. She says she has a friend there. Lamu is far away. Safe.
Yes, Lamu is good, says Daniel. You will like it. The ocean is very, very beautiful.
But why is she even thinking like this? It’s not the warm ocean she wants to see. I’m scared, Baba, says Dalila. I’m so scared.
I know, Dali. It’s okay to be scared, says Daniel, switching to Kiswahili. But listen to me, my sister, listen. You are my friend. Always. I am with you. I am there with you. We suffer together. Our stories are one. You have a great indestructible dignity, always hold to it. Do you hear me?
Yes, Baba. I will. She takes a deep breath. I will.
I have Ma’aza here.
She is there? Where are you? In the visiting lounge? In Dungavel?
Yes, we are here. She is drinking coffee. She wants to speak with you.
Hey, sugar sister, comes Ma’aza’s weak voice. You need to be strong, okay? For me.
I will, if you promise to eat.
I’m serious. I know what you did for people, for me. People never listen to me, but you did. You listen to people, you hear them. It is a great gift you give to them. Now listen to me.
I’m listening, says Dalila.
When you get to Kenya, you run, okay?
Okay.
You run immediately, my sister. Just go. Don’t be a nice girl. Don’t do what they tell you. You run and be safe.
I will.
You must promise.
Dalila wipes her tears away and says, I promise.
And then, my sugar sister, when I go to Canada, I will call you. You can live in my house and we can get old and fat.
Yes, whispers Dalila. She clamps her hand over her nose and mouth so Ma’aza can’t hear her sob.
Hello? Dalila?
I am here, she says. I am still here.
The day of her flight arrives. Before the dawn, Dalila lies awake in the dark. Her mother is in the room. Across from her waits her father, looking out of the window at the moon. Her brother stands near the door.
When the boots march up the corridor, she knows they are coming for her. She lies on her bed, so scared she finds herself hovering near the ceiling, terrified, away from herself, in a place the guards would never see.
Okay. You’re okay, Dalila whispers to herself.
She exhales long and slow, sinking down with every breath till she is fully inside herself again. She imagines Ma’aza standing in this room, chin up, hands on hips, ready to defy the guards. She pictures Daniel, leaning on his good leg, adjusting his glasses, with a quiet smile to his face. She imagines Phil here, arguing and resisting them as they come in. She imagines Mr Erdem standing in the corner with his arms around Olcay and his two girls. And Mrs Gilroy, if she was here, they would all be safe. She pictures Abbi and Abit and the face of each and every person she met at the centre till the room feels full of people, all waiting beside her, waiting for that door to open.
When the guards enter, Dalila stands up. She raises her head with a fierce dignity and meets the eyes of every man, looking right into them, unafraid of what she sees or what she allows them to see.
As one approaches with handcuffs Dalila calmly says, Why do you think you’ll need those? She walks out, down the corridor to whatever awaits her.
Epilogue
As is his habit, Daniel visits the library. He removes his gloves and flirts with the receptionist before he books an hour’s session on the computer. His ankle joint is stiff from the cold and he favours his good leg as he climbs the stairs to the mezzanine.
He googles NTV Kenya and scans the news headlines. A story, three items down, catches his attention and he clicks on the attached video. The clip begins with villagers and locals peering and pointing towards the bushes. The voice of a female reporter delivers the story.
Local residents from the village of Ruiru are still in shock at the discovery of a woman’s body in the early hours of yesterday morning. The body was discovered in a locality by the side of the road between the village of Ruiru and the Jomo Kenyatta University of Agriculture and Technology.
The segment cuts to an interview with a strong young man in a green T-shirt.
When I passed by to there, he says, I was astonished to see a . . . a body, down behind those trees, and what made me to know that it was a human being’s body? I saw the . . . the foot.
The piece cuts back to shots of a police truck. People gathered at the site. A woman’s worried face. The reporter continues.
There were four knife wounds on the victim’s body and indications that she had been raped. Early police investigations were centred around discovering the victim’s identity, believing that she might have been a student at the Jomo Kenyatta University. But it has recently been confirmed that the victim is in fact twenty-one-year-old Irene Dalila Mwathi, a former student of the Kenya Institute of Media and Technology and niece of the businessman and Narc political candidate Kennedy Mwathi.
A photograph of Dalila appears on the screen. She is in a crowd, glancing over her shoulder, about to smile.
Neither the killer nor the motive for the killing has been established and investigations into this matter continue. It is understood that the victim moved in with her uncle shortly after the murder of her family members during the political riots in Naivasha last year.
In a statement this morning, Mr Kennedy Mwathi described his niece as a good student who suffered from depression after the loss of her family. He had recently sent her on a holiday to the UK in an effort to help her overcome her emotional difficulties but he fears she may have become involved with narcotics. He also added that the criminal who did this should face the maximum force of the law and that he would support the police investigators in any way possible until her killer is found.
Watiri Mutono, NTV, near the town of Ruiru.
The screen goes black.
Daniel blinks, unsure of what he has just seen.
He watches the news segment again, waiting for her face to appear and when it does he pauses the clip.
It is her. She is there, on the news. The expression in her eyes is extraordinary, as though she is a holder of a remarkable secret. It’s a look of grace.
Daniel logs off. His fingers fumble and he struggles to button his coat. He hobbles down the stairs looking for air, fresh air.
The librarian waves as he passes. Cheerio, Daniel. See you tomorrow.
He nods, but finds he cannot reply.
Outside, the pavement is slick. Brown slush gathers around the base of the lamp-post and is cast in the gutter of the road. He takes short, deliberate steps, but soon stops. He cannot face being alone in his flat. He squints up through his glasses, wondering where he might go. The road is dark and wet. The blackening clouds announce the day’s early end and the city emits the constant sound of traffic, like wind, like the hushed prayers of a million souls. He sets his feet, lost and listening for the reassuring silence of the world’s heartbeat.
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Epub ISBN:
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Copyright © Jason Donald 2017
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First published by Jonathan Cape in 2017
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ISBN 9781910702482