“I doubt it. It’s been years, and everyone knows who my wife is.”
“Ouch,” she replied sarcastically and rolled her stupid ass eyes. “So anyway, I think I want to divorce Hudson and try to see where things go with Adrian.”
“Fuck you want me to say to that?”
“You think it’s a good idea? I mean our divorce wasn’t too bad because there were no kids, but I don’t want him trying to take Jayde.”
“If he does he won’t win, Jade. You seem to be a pretty good mom and shit. You— why am I discussing this shit with you? I got shit to handle and I’m in here playing Dr. Phil with yo’ ass.” I stood up and her eyes followed me.
“I know you have somewhere to be. I just… I’m confused still and I thought that maybe you could help me decide between Hudson and Adrian. I love them bo—”
“No you don’t. You’re in love with Adrian but you’re more in love with the idea of being straight. That’s yo’ fucking problem. That’s a lot of people’s fucking problems.” I pocketed my phone and grabbed my jacket. “Muthafuckas spend so much time loving the idea of someone or something that they end up losing out. Divorce that nigga and go be with that dumb hoe.”
“Why she gotta be all that?”
“She’s dumb as hell to even still want yo’ sheisty ass after all of that you’ve done, and she’s a hoe because she was eating yo’ pussy knowing you were married. Not to mention I was banging you raw and she was putting her mouth on ya box.”
“Whatever, Chaz. I—”
“Look, stop being scared. It’s 2017, so bumping pussies is more acceptable now. You got a baby so you don’t need to worry about procreating. You’re tough as hell Jade, too fucking tough sometimes which is a fucking turn off, but when it comes to this lesbian shit, you’re scary and weak as fuck.”
She stared at me for a moment and then nodded slowly.
“Thanks.”
“Come on.”
I opened the studio room door for her, and held it until she and her stroller were out. I finished gathering my shit, and then made my way down to my car. As soon as I pulled out of my parking space, my phone started ringing and I saw it was from Chanel’s home phone. I hit the button on the screen to answer.
“Hello?”
“Chaz, hi, this is Louise, Chanel’s mother,” she spoke frantically, so I pulled over, fearing the worst.
“Hey, what’s up? Y’all good?”
“Well… not really I guess. Chanel has gotten sicker and her doctor says she only has a few days. I know I shouldn’t be calling you but when you gave Chanel your number to ask for anything, I just thought to use it and let you know.”
“Yeah, of course. Umm, can I come by? I can’t stay long but I’d at least like to see her before anything happens.” I sighed, feeling bad for this young girl.
Niggas complained about bullshit all day like not being able to get the newest Jordans, or their Internet moving slowly, when this twenty-year-old girl was on her death bed. Shit like this just made you appreciate life more and not sweat the dumb shit.
“Oh would you please? If I know Chanel, seeing you may boost her spirits.”
Chuckling very lightly because I wasn’t in a joking mood, I responded, “On my way.”
I hung up the phone and took a detour to Chanel’s home. It was around 7 p.m., so the traffic wasn’t too bad, but still there. Anytime the 405 freeway was involved, you were bound to hit some traffic, unless it was like 2:15 a.m., and even then, you may hit some.
I made it to Chanel’s place around 7:35 p.m., and parked on the street. I quickly made my way up the driveway, and knocked a little louder than I’d intended too. I was a little frantic, feeling like she’d die before I even got to see her. I didn’t even know this girl like that but I felt like she was my little sister or something.
“Oh good, you’re here.” Louise answered the door and allowed me in.
I trailed her to the room that Chanel was in, and when I saw her she did look worse. Her skin looked dull as fuck, and she had some circles around her eyes. She was cute though, naturally, so it was hard to be completely disgusted. The scent of the room smelled like hospital products and mint, which immediately had an effect on my mood. I never liked hospitals, and even though this was technically a bedroom, it had the exact same feel.
“Chaz,” Chanel smiled weakly.
“Hey, baby girl. I heard you ain’t feeling too well.” I moved closer to her.
“Have a seat.” Louise moved a chair closer to me so that I could sit next to the bed. “Are you thirsty or hungry, Chaz?”
“No, I’m okay, but thank you.”
“You didn’t have to come,” Chanel half smiled.
“I know but I wanted to. You’re my biggest fan and plus I like talking to you.”
“You do?” her eyes widened as I nodded. She smiled hard as hell, making her dimples show. “You’re so good looking in person. Better actually,” she chuckled before letting her head hit the pillow.
“Thank you. And despite what’s going on, you’re beautiful, Chanel.”
Reaching for something on the nightstand next to her bed, she said, “This is how I used to look.”
I took the picture frame and nodded with a smile. She was a beautiful girl, still was, but her face was just skinnier now and you could see her hair was falling out constantly. This shit was fucking with me.
“Beautiful,” I finally replied.
“Can I tell you something?”
“Yeah, of course.”
“I didn’t expect you to be so nice. I mean when my mother suggested I write the email to your manager, I didn’t think I’d get a response. And if I did, I thought meeting you would ruin everything because you’d be an asshole.”
“Well I can be an asshole, but not to people like you. You don’t deserve that.”
She just gave me that same smile before placing her head against the pillow and sighing. I could see in her face how sad and afraid she was, and it just made me wish I could help her in some kind of damn way. Fuck…
Ishmael Myers
I’d just finished getting dressed in some lounge shit: boxers, sweats, a t-shirt, and some socks. One of my artists, this singer named Lexus, was performing at this club shit tonight, so of course I had to be there. However, that wasn’t until later, so right now I just wanted to kick my feet up and chill with my girl and baby.
I entered the den area to see Kady sitting on the couch, with my son sleeping next to her. She had on some little ass shorts, which reminded me that I hadn’t had any pussy in weeks. I was damn near dying, and feeling thirsty as fuck just for any type of attention. I’d gotten some head a few times, but that couldn’t compare to the warmth and wetness of some grade A pussy.
Sitting down next to her, I moved her blond locks back to plant a soft kiss on her neck. She smelled so good, and although she’d been wearing that same perfume or whatever the fuck it was since I’d met her, I never got tired of it.
“Ish,” she snickered lightly as my one kiss turned into a few more.
Next thing I knew, my hand was gripping the inside of her soft thigh, groping the hell out of it. She didn’t stop me, so I let my hand travel upward until it was between her legs. I started to massage her pussy slowly through her shorts while sucking on her neck, and just as my dick started making a tent in my pants she stopped me.
“Kady, come on man,” I groaned, still trying to kiss and touch all on her fine ass.
“Ishmael, I can’t. You know that. In three more weeks, as long as the doctor clears me. But that won’t be for a while so cut it out before you give yourself blue balls.”
“I love my son but I hate this shit,” I mumbled, checking the messages I had on my phone. I saw there was a text from Lexus making sure I was coming tonight, so I quickly replied and pocketed my phone.
“She texts you way too damn much.” Kady sucked her teeth and reached for her water bottle on the table.
“I’m her manager, Kady, come on
.”
“Yes, not her nigga, so she needs to realize the difference between the two. And she’d better realize it on her own because she doesn’t want me to explain it to her.”
“She doesn’t need to realize shit. She knows I’m with you, just like everybody else knows baby. I haven’t paid any of these bitches any mind since I got with you.”
I was chucking this new attitude up to her just having a baby, because this whole Lexus shit was coming out of nowhere. I was a fucking serial cheater before I got with Kady, which she knew, but I hadn’t touched or even entertained another female since I’d been with her.
I can’t really say it was because I was a changed man; it was more so because Kady was the shit, honestly. I never found myself wanting to be with or thinking about another bitch because she had it all. The pussy was fire, so was the head, and her personality was one of a kind. Some days she was my girl, my baby, and others she was like my best friend. Being with another woman never crossed my mind because if she wasn’t on it, then my money was on my mind.
“Well let’s keep it that way.”
“It’s gon’ stay that way forever, so relax baby.” I rubbed her thigh before giving it a squeeze.
“Forever?” She glanced over at me.
“Yeah.” I leaned over a little and pecked her, before draping my arm along the back of the couch behind her head.
“So, you see us as forever thing?”
“Yeah. I mean right now I do. Plus, even if we didn’t last, we got a baby together so we’d still be in each other’s lives forever anyways.”
“Right now, you see us as forever?”
“Ain’t that what I just said?” I furrowed my brows. I didn’t know what her ass was on, but in a minute I was about to take my son to the other room and just chill alone with his sleeping ass.
“Yeah, but I’m just trying to make sure I understand.” Her tone was dripping with attitude, so I could already sense where this was headed. “Where are you going? We’re not done talking,” she said once I stood up.
“I’m about to go play my video game or something because yo’ ass is tripping.”
“I’m tripping because I wanna know when you’re gonna take this relationship to the next level? I’m not gonna be your girlfriend or any other nigga’s girlfriend until I’m 40. Sorry!”
“Kady, what the fuck is you talking about, man?” I frowned, throwing my arms out in irritation.
“I just told you what the fuck I’m talking about, dummy! I need to know where the hell this relationship is going because I’m not about to be having your babies and then wake up and you don’ married some other bitch!”
“What other bitch?”
“Lord Jesus, why is this nigga so stupid?” she looked up at the ceiling and shook her head, before turning to face me again. “I want to be married, Ishmael. I’m not saying tomorrow or even this year, but I need to know that, that’s where you see this going and not just right now. We’ve been together for almost three years and you haven’t even mentioned any type of future, which is worrisome. And now you’re still acting like it could go either way, after I’ve had your child,” she spoke calmly.
The desperation in her eyes, along with her words had caught me off guard. I thought we were good, but clearly, she’d been bothered this whole time or worse, unhappy. And I didn’t know if I should be honest with her, or lie and say what she wanted me to. But because we were so close as friends, I just couldn’t lie.
“Kady, baby, I love you, I do, and my son. I—”
“Love me or in love with me?” Her voice trembled.
“I didn’t know there was a difference, but I’m in love with you. I am, I swear. But I’m not ready to be married.”
“You’re just not ready to be married to me you mean.”
“No, don’t put words in my fucking mouth. I’m not ready to marry anyone. If I was, trust me, it’d be you. I wanna be with you, and right now I hope us just being in a committed relationship is enough for you.”
“And how long is that supposed to last before you grow up?”
“Wow,” I chuckled. “So, because I don’t wanna be Mike Brady, I need to grow up? Nah, you need to grow the fuck up and stop trying to be like every other bitch you see. Laine, Cassie, and Erynne’s relationships ain’t got shit to do with us!”
“It’s not about them! When have I ever not been my own person, Ish? Huh? It’s about the fact that we’ve been shacking up and you haven’t even made one gesture to show me that this is gonna be something long lasting. We are in the exact same place we were in when we first started!” tears streamed her cheeks as she yelled at me.
“You buggin’.” I waved her off.
“You need to—”
“We ain’t about to get married aight!” I barked loudly as fuck. “I’m not saying that we won’t ever get married but that shit ain’t on my radar right now! So either you can accept that and be cool, or we can end this shit!”
My son woke up because of all the yelling so when he started to cry, Kady picked him up and cuddled him. She kissed his face, and once he calmed down she looked to me and said, “Bye.”
I nodded in response and left the crib.
***
That night…
Kordell and I sat in the VIP section of the medium sized venue that Lexus was gonna be singing in. She was about to be on stage in less than five minutes, but I could barely focus. The argument between Kady and I had been circling my mind constantly, and I was torn on whether or not being honest was the right thing to do. I didn’t want to get married right now, because marriage wasn’t shit these days. Muthafuckas still cheated on each other, and once shit got rough, niggas wanted out.
I just couldn’t bring myself to marry Kady, only for her to get fed up with washing my dirty socks and bounce. Had it been back in the day like the 1940’s or some shit, I would have been wifed her. But nowadays, marriage wasn’t sacred at all. That certificate is only a piece of paper to a lot of muthafuckas, and no longer a vow and a bond. But I loved Kady, a lot, and didn’t want to be without her. However, if she wanted marriage more than me, I would have to let her go.
“Nigga, why you in here looking like you constipated and shit?” Kordell asked, voice laced with weed smoke as he blew it out.
We made sure to be in the dark, because I knew if the crowd saw him he would take the shine away from Lexus and I didn’t want that.
“If I tell you some shit, you have to promise to be serious about it.”
“Why you even gotta say that bullshit? I can be serious, nigga, fuck you.” He took another toke on the blunt, and then added, “You just gotta let me know ahead of time that I can’t rag on yo’ ass.”
“Never mind.” I shook my head.
“I’m fucking with you. Nah, actually, I’m serious, but for real tell me. Now that I know this is a real moment, I’m gon’ be real.”
Pondering on whether or not I should believe his ignorant ass, I finally decided to give my little cousin the benefit of the doubt. Kordell was as foolish as they came, but when he was being serious, he was smart as hell; a little crazy too like his brothers.
“Kady and I broke up.”
“What? Y’all just had a fucking kid. Don’t tell me a baby fucked y’all shit up that quickly.”
Shaking my head, I said, “Nah, it didn’t. Actually, made us closer until today. She asked me where I saw us going, and I told her so far it looked like we’d be together forever.”
“Nigga, please tell me you ain’t say so far.”
“I didn’t say so far, but I said right now. Why?” I turned to look at him in the dimly lit club.
“You might as well have said, ‘as long as your pussy stays good’. Telling her right now, so far, or whatever the fuck you said means temporarily.”
“That ain’t what I meant though.”
“I know that but women put 100’s on 10’s. For example, when Cassie and I first got married, I used to cuddle her ass all fucking night
. I mean all fucking night, even when it was hot as hell and I wanted to kick her ass onto the floor.”
I laughed.
“How is this random shit helping me?”
“Listen nigga. Don’t interrupt me you know my attention span don’t go far. This shit will slip my fucking mind.” He blew out smoke. “Aight so one night, during summer, I let her go in the middle of night because I was about to have a damn heat stroke. Her ass woke up seconds later, cut the light on, and wanted to know what bitch I was fucking that had me not cuddling her all night. So see, women analyze everything and make something small a big deal.”
“What does that have to do with me saying right now?”
This nigga was so high his eyes looked closed.
“Kady is over analyzing that shit, my nigga. Right now translates to soon as I find another bitch, yo’ ass is for the birds.”
Sighing, I ran my hands down my face and shook my head.
“Well, shit, maybe this is for the best because I ain’t marrying nobody.”
“I applaud you for letting her go then. Let another nigga marry her.”
Kordell’s sentence made my stomach knot up at the thought. I would be sick if Kady got with another nigga, let alone married his ass. Kady was a gem for sure, especially in a world full of scheming ass hoes and shallow bitches. But maybe I just needed some time. I wasn’t gonna make any decisions right now and fuck some shit up. So for now, Kady and I were over with.
Lexus finally came on the stage, and Kordell and I watched closely the whole time. I made sure her ass was doing all the right moves, and that her voice didn’t sound like she was running out of breath.
Lexus was twenty-one and from Mississippi, so being out here had her acting out a little bit. I had to make sure her ass kept her eyes on the money and not the club or these niggas.
Her set was finally over about an hour later, so I had Brick escort her from the stage to the VIP area. She wanted to meet Kordell ever since I signed her to my management company, but I told her she needed to be on her best behavior for that. So tonight was her reward night, and since she did so well on stage, I really felt she deserved it.
My Baby Is A West Coast King 4 Page 15