by Jordan Marie
“That doesn’t mean you follow my path. Jesus H. Christ.”
“I fucked up. I get it. But there was no way that motherfucking piece of shit was going to draw another breath after taking my child from me. I squeezed the life out of him and rejoiced while I fucking did it. You can’t tell me you would have done it differently.”
“I would have done everything different!” he growls, and he barely gets it out before I interrupt him.
“No, you wouldn’t have. You would have…”
“I would have sent that son of a bitch to hell piece by piece! What I wouldn’t have done was ended my own fucking life in the process! Always cover your ass, Maxwell. You do not leave your ass swinging in the trees.”
“I…”
“You went off half-cocked, like a stupid motherfucker and…”
“And did what a man does!”
“Really, asshole? My way, you’d be with the woman who is in the other room crying her heart out over you. The kind of woman who supports a man and makes him strong. Not tears his ass down.”
“Like you are an expert on women,” I come back at him, but it’s weak. I know it is, and he knows it is.
“Are you done blubbering out of your asshole and finally ready to listen to your old man?”
“I don’t…”
“I guess not.”
I take a breath and bite my tongue. Everything is fucked up. Marcum might be a lot of things, but he’s not wrong about this.
“It’s too late,” I say the words I believe down deep, half hoping he’ll tell me I’m wrong.
“Maybe,” he says, and that one word is fucking hard to hear.
32
Tess
Max has been MIA. I have no idea where he is. When we got back to the Marcum’s, I was immediately sent to my room like a naughty little child. I didn’t care. My arm hurt, I was sick to my stomach, and I had a headache. I was also acknowledging that my choices were coming back to haunt me. I am officially a felon now. The cops were shooting and intent on apprehending Max, and they no longer considered me collateral damage. I am part of the problem in their eyes. I can’t be surprised about it. I’m not sure how I feel. I made my own decisions. I chose Max. He pretty much gave me an out after that first day. I didn’t take it. I ran straight into the shit storm that I’m in now, and I’m pretty sure I would do the same thing again. I love Max. That’s a constant. The plain truth is, I’ve gone too far to turn back.
Cherry came by and made sure I ate. I took a quick bath. My arm hurts like hell, but the injury is superficial. I only needed three stitches. Ride gave me some pain medication, but I didn’t take it. I opted for Tylenol instead. Pretty soon, I’ll need to face reality on a lot of things…
“You’re looking better.” Max’s deep voice grabs my attention. I’m looking out of the window wondering exactly, what is going to happen next and scared of finding out. I guess it’s out of my hands now. I try to mentally prepare myself for whatever Max is going to tell me. Before I can turn around, he’s standing beside me, pulling the curtains closed over the window. “Standing in front of a window might not be the wisest thing just now, Kitten.”
He pulls me away from the window, and we sit down on the bed. Nerves are overtaking me, and I’m not sure what to say to, Max. “I thought the compound was locked down?” I ask instead and hope he doesn’t notice how strained and timid my voice sounds.
“It is, Kitten. It is. We’re safe here for now.” His hand cups the side of my face, and I lean into it and close my eyes. I take a deep breath and let his scent and presence envelope me. It calms me. As long as Max is here, then I’m okay. As long as he’s with me, we’re okay.
“What comes next, Max?” I ask the one question that won’t leave me alone. The one question I’m terrified of knowing the answer to, but have to know either way.
Max sighs and joins our hands together. I watch him, and he’s staring at our linked hands and looking deep in thought. I hold my breath and bite my tongue against the questions I want to ask him. I’m afraid to spook him. I’m petrified he’s going to leave me behind. That’s it. That’s what everything boils down to. Is Max going to leave me?
“We need to talk, Kitten.” There’s a sentence to ease the fear that’s gripping your heart. Not.
“Save it, Mad Max. You are not leaving me behind. It’s not happening. You asked me to go to Aruba with you and other places from there, and I’m doing that. It’s done; we made our choices, and there’s no going back. You might as well just…”
His lips crush mine, stopping my nervous tirade. The flavor of him in my mouth makes me moan. So I open, and my tongue wars with his. I feel his hand grip the side of my neck and his thumb slides up and down against the center of my throat in a steady movement that accentuates the drumming of my pulse. He bites on my bottom lip, and I gasp from the sting, and then murmur approval as his tongue slides along the worried skin, soothing it. I raise my hand to pull him close, and my body goes still and tight from the pain. Damn stitches.
Max pulls away when he feels me tense up. “I’m sorry, Kitten,” he says, helping me bring the arm back down. It might be just three stitches, but I guess the placement of them, or whatever, makes them hurt with every movement. It’s either that or the fact I refused the meds that Ride warned I would need. “Tess, I have to give you the option. Marcum and the boys can make sure you go back to your life. The police will release a statement saying you were held against your will, and that I only released you once I had jumped the border. You won’t need to worry about anything and your life can go back to…”
It’s me who stops him this time. I put my fingers against his lips.
“I don’t want to go back to life before you, Max.”
“Tess.”
“Do you want me to leave? Is that it? Would you rather I wasn’t a part of this?” I ask, afraid of the answer, but needing to know, regardless.
That’s when Max surprises me. He gathers me in his arms, careful with my bad arm. He sits me in his lap while somehow pushing us back on the bed so he can recline against the headboard. Then, he places a kiss against my temple and situates me so I’m lying against his heart, and the beat of it is drumming in my ear.
“I don’t want to let you go, Tess. Ever. What you are to me, has nothing to do with what we started out as.”
That one sentence from Max takes my breath.
33
Max
I hold her close. Marcum’s speech hit had me hard. He and I had spent more time rehashing what paths I had before me. He made it clear what he would choose. I, on the other hand, didn’t agree. Regardless, I have choices, but the problem is that each selection has some fucking huge consequences. How do I choose? Do I take Tess with me? Doing that, means, never coming back. I may not be super close to Marcum, but I would still miss the sorry fuck. Do I let her go back to her world without me and still say goodbye to everything? Can I accept that? Can I let Tess go? Just the thought of it curls me in knots.
“I don’t want to let you go, Tess,” I repeat.
“Then don’t.”
“It would be better for you,” I feel obligated to tell her.
“Last I checked, I was an adult, and I say it wouldn’t be.”
“We could try your route, Tess. Turn myself in, and wait to be together.”
Her body stiffens under me, and I kiss her again on the top of her head. I would be willing to do this for Tess. If I knew she was waiting for me, I would try it. Marcum would swing his influence out there; like I wouldn’t let him before. The waiting would be hard. The unknowing would almost kill me, but I would. For her, I would.
“No.”
The one word is quiet, but firm.
“It’s what you wanted, Tess.”
“It’s not the same now. They want your head, Max. They want to make an example out of you. It’s even more dangerous now.”
“You’ve been watching the news.”
“Some, yeah. The result would b
e too unknown now, Max. I’ll support you whatever you decide, as long as you make me a part of your endgame, but I think getting the hell out of dodge is the best answer.”
“You could live like that, Kitten?”
“With you by my side, yes.”
Her words do something crazy to me. My chest contracts and this nervous energy runs through my system. For so long I’ve been a dead man inside, and Tess has somehow been bringing him back to life. The fact that she wants me beside her…me… Fucking hell.
My fingers dive into her hair, and I bring her face up to mine.
“I care for you, Tess. This is not just about fucking you now. You need to be sure.”
Something flashes in her eyes, but it’s gone quickly. Maybe I imagined it. She doesn’t respond with words. Instead, she gives me her lips. A sweet kiss, a promise.
“We won’t be able to leave for two days. Marcum wants to let the dust settle and let his contacts start some smokescreens. It will make it easier for us to get away.”
“What if they find us again?” She asks, her voice filled with fear she doesn’t bother to hide.
“They won’t, Kitten.”
“You can’t be sure, Max. They found out about us somehow. Maybe we should leave here now, we can’t be too careful.”
“It’s being handled.”
“Max, you can’t be sure…”
“We know who the informant was,” I tell her. She goes still, and those green eyes search my face. Fuck, if I blushed, I’d be doing it now.
“That cum-guzzling, whore-bag, rubber-band, saggy-assed cunt…”
I laugh, I can’t help myself. “Rubber-band, saggy-assed cunt?”
“Yeah you know, stretches all to hell like a rubber band and then snaps back and cut your dick off, but once it’s been stretched it never actually goes back to the same…”
“I get the picture. Can we not talk about that whore-bag? There are other things I’d like to do when you’re in my arms.”
“Like what?”
“I’ll show you,” I whisper, deepening our kiss.
“Max,” she whispers.
“Quiet, Kitten. I’m going to love you real gentle.”
“What if I don’t want gentle?”
“Too damn bad,” I tell her, and I mean it. Tomorrow I’ll give her what her body craves. Tonight I need to make sure she knows I care and that she matters to me.
34
Tess
“What are you doing?” I question Max. I’m lying on the bed; too exhausted from the night before to move. Max has just come through the front door; he’s rolling a silver utility cart and he’s humming. Humming! Before he even answers, Dusty, Marcum, and few other boys come in carrying a curved, lounge-on chair. I gasp and dive under the cover because Max made sure I was naked as the day I was born when we fell asleep. He says clothes slow him down, and he needs easy access. I find that waking up with his head buried between my legs is a good thing, so I don’t argue.
They all leave but Marcum; he stands by the door grins and winks. “You ever get tired of this son of a bitch, Tess and want to try out a real man? You just let me know, honey. You just let me know.”
I laugh, which I’m sure is what I’m meant to do.
“Fuck off, Marcum,” Max grumbles, though there’s no anger in his voice.
“No respect. Boy has no respect for his elders,” Marcum says laughing and closing the door.
Max leans against the closed door, looking like the cocky sex god that he is. I love that look on him. I love that smile on him. It makes me proud. I give him that. Me. I know Max doesn’t love me. He’s as much as confessed that, but he did say that he cares for me. I bring him something, even if I’m not sure what it is. I do that. From being with Max and everything I’ve read, that’s never happened. That’s enough for me—more than really.
“Are you ready, Kitten?”
“For what?” I ask, but the look in his eyes, combined with his smile, makes my insides heat up, and it’s a struggle not to scream, yes! Jesus, I’d do anything this man wanted just to keep getting those looks.
“I’m branding you today.”
“Uh…Mad Max, I love you and all, but I am not a side of beef.”
“I don’t know; you’re juicy, and I do like to eat you…”
“You’re such a romantic Max. Be still my beating heart.”
“Keep it up and I’ll beat you,” he jokes, throwing my covers back and gathering me in his arms.
“Max! It’s cold! At least let me get dressed!”
“Nope, sorry. I need you naked.”
“For what? What are we doing here?” I ask, but by then I’m lying on the chair and watching, as he starts taking things out of the cart and hooking up electric to his equipment. “You’re tattooing me?” I ask with awe in my voice. I want his mark on me. I need it.
He kisses my stomach, and it makes me wanton, I instantly feel the tug of need and wetness gather between my legs. Max is lethal to me.
“Max,” I murmur, my voice needy.
“Later, Kitten. First, you’re going to have my work on your body.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?” he questions as I settle down in the chair, filled with anticipation.
“I want your mark on me, Max.”
“Do you care where I put it?”
“I belong to you, anywhere you want is fine, more than once, even.”
“Fuck, Kitten,” he growls and his mouth slams against mine, almost in anger, but it’s not. I can tell from the hungry way his tongue takes over my mouth and the way his hand grabs my neck and holds my lips to his. My words mean something to him. I give myself over to his kiss. When we break apart, we’re both inhaling, raggedly.
“Max, you keep it up, and you’ll have to fuck me before we can get your name on me.”
“I’m not seeing that as a drawback, Tess.”
I smile; because for the first time since we were almost captured, I feel free. If I could leave the world behind so that Max and I were the only ones who existed, I would. In a heartbeat. I slap his leg playfully. “Ink now, then sex.”
He laughs but starts working. He seems to know what he wants. So I lie back and let him work his magic. The first part tickles but I do my best to hold still.
“I’m doing a simple design on your hip. I don’t want it to be too intricate because I want it done today. I want my name on you, Tess. I need that.”
His words vibrate through me, and I don’t respond, because if I did the only thing that would come out would be a happy sigh of a girl whose brain is mush over a man.
“When did you start tattooing?” I ask as I get lost in the feel of his hands on me. My eyes are closed, and I can’t ever remember being this happy.
“I thought you’ve read all about me?” He asks, not bothering to look up.
“I want to hear things from you, Max.”
“My uncle had an old army buddy, Spandex Pete.”
“Spandex Pete?”
“Crazy as hell, I think Raymond was saner. He wore these bright colored, spandex pants all of the time. Strangest fucking colors I’ve ever seen, we’re talking purple, hot pink, yellow, lime green…he’d hurt your eyes to look at him sometimes.”
“Wow.”
“Mm…hmm… But as crazy as he was, he could do magic with a tattoo gun. He gave me my first tattoo.”
“Which one?”
“The eagle. He said my spirit animal was the eagle. I had no idea what the hell that shit meant, still don’t. But the eagle was fucking cool. So I agreed with him.”
Max has an eagle covering his back shoulder. The eagle is flying, soaring really and the intricate work on the wings alone is something that I always find my fingers tracing over when we’re in bed together.
“I can see that.”
“What?” he asks, still intent on my hip, and I wish I could see what he’s doing.
“The eagle. It’s brave, bold, kind of a loner but fiercely protective, l
oyal…”
“Tess,” he warns.
“Plus it has a really big….”
He looks up at me with a cross between disbelief and amusement on his face. “Do not tell me you know the size of an eagle’s dick, Kitten.”
“I was going to say wing span, Mad Max,” I joke.
He laughs, shakes his head and goes back to work. I close my eyes and let him. Mission accomplished. I made Max laugh.
35
Max
“Well?” I ask her.
Tess is looking in the mirror that hanging on the back of the bathroom door of our room. She’s staring at the tattoo I put on her hip. I’m nervous. Fuck, I don’t do nerves. This is the first time a tattoo has really mattered to me. I want Tess to like it, and the fact that I’m sweating it out makes me feel like my balls are in a fucking clamp. Hell, next thing she’ll be leading me around by my dick and patting me on the head saying, good boy.
“Max…”
“You’ll wear it and like it. Too fucking late now,” I tell her, turning away to pack my tools up. It doesn’t matter if she likes it or not. It’s me; I’m on her now and by god it’s just the first time too. I’ll have my name all over that fucking body before I’m done.
“Will you shut up? You’re ruining my moment.”
“Your moment?”
“Yes, I have a kickass tattoo on my hip. It’s a tattoo made by my man, and I like seeing his name on my body. So, I’m looking in the mirror, enjoying the way it looks and the way it makes me feel, and you’re ruining it with your grizzly bear, alpha male, growly shit,” she huffs.
I slide my arms around her and pull her into me. I kiss her forehead and tuck her head under my neck. “How does it make you feel?” I ask, closing my eyes and just enjoying the feel of her in my arms.
“Sexy.”
“Kitten, you are always sexy.”
“It’s an eagle’s wing,” she whispers, and I can be completely stupid about most things, but I hear the happiness in her words.
“Yeah,” I tell her my voice suddenly tight.