Shaking off her unease, Alex dug in.
“Everything’s ready,” Rachel said, expertly flipping her eggs. “I’m due to do some barrel tastings, so if someone should happen to see us go into the cave tonight, they won’t think a thing about it.”
She checked her omelet, then slid it onto a plate. “Are you ready for this?”
Alex had to honestly admit that she was not. “But I’m doing it anyway. I’m not going to run away from the truth. I won’t be like my mother.”
They finished their meal in silence. Together, they straightened the kitchen, then donned jackets. Rachel handed her a flashlight and they stepped outside. The stars and moon, obscured by clouds, turned the night a deep black. Rachel led the way, moving slowly, deliberately toward the cave entrance.
Alex’s heartbeat quickened; fear turned the inside of her mouth to ash. As if she knew, Rachel caught her hand and laced their fingers together. The way they had when they were kids. And the way she had at five years old, Alex clung to it.
The cave was secured by both iron gates and a chain and padlock. Rachel unlocked both; they slipped through the gate and into the cave. Once inside, Rachel snapped on her flashlight; Alex followed suit. Training the beam dead ahead, they moved forward.
Alex caught Rachel’s hand, clinging to it. With each step deeper into the cave, Alex’s fear grew. The walls and ceiling closed in on her, the dark became heavier, more impenetrable. Her heart beat wildly, her every instinct screamed she should run. Her steps faltered. She couldn’t do this, she thought. She couldn’t.
Rachel tightened her fingers. “Stay with me, Alex. We’re almost there.”
“I don’t know if… I-” Her voice rose. “I don’t-”
Rachel cut her off. “Yes, you can. Do it for Dylan. Do it for Tim.”
And for her mother, Alex thought, marshaling her courage. No more running. No more searching for what was missing.
She would finally know.
They wound deeper. Every so often the lichen would catch on her hair or brush her face and she would squeak in terror. She squeezed Rachel’s hand so tightly, she knew it must hurt. She told herself to ease up, but found she couldn’t respond.
“Talk to me, Rachel. Please, just talk-Oh my God, it’s happening. I smell it! Sandalwood!”
“It’s okay.” Rachel said softly. “It’s real, I set the stage. We’re almost there.”
Alex stumbled; Rachel steadied her. The smell grew stronger. A thrumming filled her head, like a chant. She wanted to run, but was frozen in fear.
Rachel tugged on her hand. “C’mon, Alex, just a few more steps.”
Her words seemed to be coming from a great distance. Alex obeyed woodenly. They turned. In the distance she saw a circle of flickering light. With each step it grew bigger, more brilliant, its pull on her stronger.
“You’re five years old, Alex,” Rachel said softly. “You didn’t mean any harm… you just wanted to see what was happening…”
And then Alex realized: Rachel was a bigger part of the nightmare than she had let on. She looked at her. “I followed you, didn’t I? That night, I followed you into the cave.”
“Yes,” Rachel said softly.
Alex brought a hand to her mouth, not so much remembering as putting the pieces together. “You hated it when I followed you around. But I did it all the time. I adored you.”
Alex put herself back there, imagining that night. “I hear you sneak out and decide to follow.”
“You brought Dylan with you.”
“Yes. I would have known I couldn’t leave him alone.”
Alex pictured her five-year-old self standing on tiptoe, scooping Dylan up out of his crib. He would have been heavy for her. She imagined her determination. Her fear of dropping him.
“You went into the cave.”
“Yes,” Rachel agreed.
Alex looked ahead, at the flickering light pouring out of an alcove up ahead. From candles, she realized. “And I followed you even though I was terrified of the cave.”
Again, Rachel agreed.
“At some point I must have heard sounds. Like the ones from my visions. And seen the flickering lights.”
Alex wetted her lips, dry from breathing heavily through her mouth. She realized she held her arms as if cradling a baby. She moved forward, toward the lit opening, Rachel beside her.
She stepped into the room, her gaze going immediately to an opening in the cave wall. She crossed to it. “You were peeking through an opening. This opening.”
“You called my name,” Rachel said. “When I saw you, I was so angry. Because I was scared. I knew how much trouble I could be in. Then Dylan started to cry.”
Rachel reached out as if to take a baby from her arms. “I took him. To try to get him to stop. What did you do then, Alex?”
Alex shifted her gaze to the opening again. “I wanted to see what you were looking at.” She crossed to the opening. With her mind’s eye, she saw herself, drawn to the flickering light, like tentacles of fire reaching for her, pulling her in. She peered through the opening.
And the past hit her with the force of a wrecking ball, the memory of what she saw flooding back. Men in long, hooded robes. Women, too, but some naked… Dancing sensuously in the candlelight. Touching themselves. Being touched. The grunting, howling noises from her dreams. Not strange creatures-the sounds of wild sex.
Sex. Her mother, Alex remembered. Naked. Spread out on an altar, a man on top of her. Riding her.
Rachel came up behind her. “You started to scream. I put my hand over your mouth, like this.”
Rachel covered her mouth and jerked her away from the opening. “Go back to bed,” she hissed. “And if you tell anyone what you saw, I’ll hurt you. I promise I will. I’ll do to you what those men are doing to your mommy!”
Rachel released her and Alex stumbled backward, away from the opening. She sank to the cave floor, and brought her hands to her face, feeling ill. Candles, incense and an altar. All the trappings of a religious ritual. The orgy in progress. She wouldn’t have had any frame of reference for what she was witnessing. No place to put it. How frightened she must have been.
It explained so much about her. Her studies, relationships and periods of promiscuity. She had spent her life trying to make sense of it all.
“Alex,” Rachel said softly, kneeling in front of her. “Let’s finish this.”
CHAPTER SIXTY-NINE
Wednesday, March 17
9:05 P.M.
Alex searched Rachel’s expression. In it she saw steely resolve-and regret. “What are you thinking?” Alex asked.
“I’m sorry I said that to you. I was just a kid, I was terrified of what Dad would do to me if he found out. I’m so, so sorry.”
Alex let out a deep, shuddering breath. “I’m not sure I can do this anymore.”
“Yes, you can. I want to be free. Don’t you?”
She did. Dear God, she wanted it more than anything. She squeezed her eyes shut, opening the door in her mind: a naked man howling, fully aroused… her mother spread out on the altar, bodies writhing together… springing away… Rachel’s hand over her mouth, the hissed words in her ear…
“Go back to bed. And if you tell anyone what you saw, I’ll hurt you. I promise I will. I’ll do to you what those men are doing to your mommy!”
She opened her eyes, looked at Rachel. “I ran, didn’t I?”
“Yes. But you didn’t go back to bed, did you?”
“No.” Alex swallowed hard, reliving those terrifying minutes. “I started to. Then I hid. Behind some barrels.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know. I was scared. I wanted to see-To wait for you.”
“You didn’t wait long, did you?”
“No. You had Dylan. You were hurrying.” Alex swallowed hard; she rubbed her damp palms against her jeans. “I waited a minute, then followed. I couldn’t see you anymore. Then I heard Dylan crying again. You screamed.
“I ran the
n. You were at the front of the cave. There was a group of robed men… they were all around you.”
Alex brought her hands to her mouth. “They took Dylan and… Rachel… they grabbed you and dragged you beyond where I could see.”
She was crying, Alex realized. She wiped at the tears with the heels of her hands. “I peeked around… they had you on the ground, holding you down. You were fighting, but they were too strong, there were too many…
“Your T-shirt, they yanked it up over your face. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t make a sound. But inside… I was screaming.”
Alex couldn’t stop the words, they poured out of her in a rush. “He raped you, Rachel. The others were cheering… laughing…” God, she hated this. It hurt saying the words, but she had to. “He wasn’t the only one. The others… after him-”
“Two others,” Rachel whispered.
“Yes. Then, you didn’t move anymore. I knew that was bad. I wanted to find our parents, but I was afraid. I couldn’t go back in there… I was too scared!” Her voice caught on a sob. “I’m sorry, Rachel. I’m so sorry.”
“How many, Alex? How many were there?”
She struggled to remember. “Five, I think. One ran away. One just helped hold you down. They teased him about it but-”
She looked at Rachel. “Oh my God, the first one, before he raped you, he said-”
“ ‘You want to know so bad,’ ” Rachel murmured, “ ‘I’ll show you.’ ” She caught Alex’s hands. “You said that in your dream, it was Clark’s voice. Was it?”
“I don’t know for sure, Rachel. I’d just had that confrontation with him. Maybe that’s why it was his voice.”
“What about Dylan?” she asked.
“He was there, on the ground, not far from the cave entrance. Crying and crying-”
“And then he stopped. Why, Alex?”
She fought to remember. “I don’t know. Something… Suddenly all but one was gone. They ran away.”
They ran away. Frightened. They were just boys, she realized. Teenagers. Like Clark.
She looked directly at Rachel. “I ran, too. But then stopped, and looked back. His hood had fallen away-”
Alex grabbed Rachel’s hands, squeezing them tightly. “It was Clark. The boy who raped you first was Clark.”
CHAPTER SEVENTY
Wednesday, March 17
10:10 P.M.
Moments passed; neither moved. Alex kept ahold of Rachel’s hands.
“Clark,” Rachel said, voice shaking. “That son of a bitch. I always wondered, but-”
“I’m sorry, Rachel.”
“I’m not. I’m thrilled.” Rachel freed her hands and stood. “I’m going to take care of this right now.”
Alex followed her to her feet. “What are you going to do?”
Rachel didn’t hesitate. “I’m going to kill him.”
Alex wanted to laugh. It started to form on her lips, uncomfortable and inappropriate. “You’re joking, right?”
“I’ve got a gun, Alex. I bought it specifically for this. And I’m going to use it.”
Alex’s heart lurched. “Don’t do this, Rachel. It’s not worth it. He’s not worth it.”
“You don’t think so? All my life I’ve lived with what they did to me. I hid it away, shoved it into the deepest, darkest corner of my mind. Because I didn’t know who. I do now. And he’s going to pay.”
She started off; Alex went after her. “Wait! What about Dylan?”
Rachel stopped but didn’t look back.
“After I saw Clark’s face, I ran. Back to my bed,” Alex said. “What happened to our brother?”
“He was gone.” Rachel turned. “When I could move, I dragged myself over to where he had been, but he wasn’t there. There was blood.”
The blood the police and FBI found.
“Why didn’t you get help? Why not go to your dad or-”
“And tell them what? That I was spying on them? Tell them what those boys did to me-I was ashamed! I was scared! I didn’t know what to do! I-”
She tipped her face to the ceiling, fighting tears. “I thought… I hoped, Dylan was back in his bed. Who would hurt him? He was such a sweet baby. So I crept back to the house and cleaned myself up. I didn’t even check his crib because… I couldn’t. I prayed he would be there in the morning. I promised myself he would be.”
But he wasn’t.
“I can’t change that, Alex. And I’ve lived with it for twenty-five years. Helpless to change anything. But I can change this. I’m not helpless anymore.”
She turned and started off. “Wait!” Alex called. “What about justice for Dylan? Let’s go to the police. Let’s-”
“This is justice for Dylan,” Rachel said without looking back. “Who do you think killed him? Who did you see standing there?”
“I can’t let you do this.”
“You can’t stop me.”
She turned. Alex caught her breath. She had a gun; she was pointing it at Alex.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m sorry, Alex. I have to do this.”
“You’re going to shoot me?”
“Only if I have to.”
“We’re stepsisters. Friends-”
“Clark and I are cousins. That didn’t stop him, did it?”
“You’re better than he is! Dammit, Rachel-”
“I’m going now. Don’t follow me.”
She meant it, Alex realized, watching as Rachel walked away. She had to stop her. Had to find a way.
“What about the vines?” she called after her, sounding as desperate as she felt. “What about your wines, your legacy?”
Rachel didn’t answer. The bobbling beam of the flashlight disappeared from sight. Alex counted to ten and started after her-same as she had all those years ago.
She moved as quickly and quietly as she could, forgoing the flashlight for stealth. Her heart pounded, but not with fear this time, with determination.
She wouldn’t let Rachel do this.
Up ahead, she heard Rachel at the cave entrance. Heard the creak of the gate closing and the clank of the chain and padlock.
Rachel was locking her inside the cave.
Alex snapped on the flashlight and ran. She was too late. Rachel had fastened the gate. She stood waiting for Alex, expression apologetic.
“They’ll find you in the morning,” she said. “Don’t be scared.”
“Please, think this through, Rachel. Please, don’t-”
“I’ve spent my whole life thinking this through.”
“Rachel-” Alex reached through the metal rails. “I don’t want to lose you.”
“Before I go, I have to tell you something. That baby brush, I have one just like it.”
“What? You-”
“Wayne Reed’s not your father.” Rachel caught her hand, brought it to her mouth, kissed it. “Goodbye, Alex.”
CHAPTER SEVENTY-ONE
Wednesday, March 17
10:30 P.M.
They’d located Alex’s car. The Rohnert Park Walmart parking lot. A search of the store had produced no sign of her; they were in the process of getting the store’s security tapes.
Reed shown his flashlight inside the Prius. No sign of a struggle. No left behind articles that might suggest a criminal act. No shopping bags.
He didn’t like this. His earlier presumption that she’d bolted felt wrong. All along he’d seesawed between suspecting she was behind events and worrying she was in danger from them. The seesaw had just tipped-he feared for her safety.
Reed looked at the deputy who had called it in, working to keep his cool. “Report.”
“Doing a routine sweep. Recognized the car from the Alert, checked the plate number to confirm, then called it in. Performed the same check as you.”
Tanner and Saacks arrived. They climbed out and crossed to him. “You have a visitor.” Tanner motioned to the car. “Your brother Joe. Came to the Barn looking for you. Says it’s about Clarkson and what’s
going on. Wouldn’t talk to us.”
Reed’s heart seemed to stop. He nodded and headed for the car; Joe stepped out as he reached it. His normally pressed and creased brother was a mess. “I don’t want to talk to them,” Joe said, motioning to Tanner and Saacks. “Just you.”
“Can’t help you there, Big Brother. We’re a package deal.”
“Forget it then. I’m not talking.”
Reed snapped. “No problem. Because I’ll haul your ass in and book you for obstruction, which is a felony. And then you’ll talk, only it’ll be in a nine by twelve windowless room with a lock on the door. Don’t test me, Brother.”
Joe paled. He moved his gaze from Reed to the other detectives and back. He looked like he might puke. “It’s about that night. The night Dylan disappeared. We raped her. We raped… Rachel.”
Standing in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, Reed could have heard a pin drop. His brother dragged a hand through his thinning hair, the movement jerky. “I didn’t. I… couldn’t. I ran away. But the others-”
“Who?” Tanner demanded.
“Clark and Tom. Spanky and Terry.
“I ran, but I didn’t do anything to stop them. I didn’t go for help. Nothing.”
He hung his head. Reed gazed at him, feeling nothing but contempt. “Where?”
“The Sommer place. Outside the wine cave.”
Reed and Tanner exchanged glances. “The night Dylan disappeared.”
“Yes, he was there. Rachel had him. He was crying.”
Reed felt sick to his stomach. “What about Alex?”
“Didn’t see her.”
Tanner’s cell phone went off. She checked the display, then excused herself.
“Did you go to Dad, tell him any of this?”
He shook his head. “Never told anyone. Until now.” He started to cry. “All these years, I’ve hated myself… that I let them do that to her.” He lifted his gaze to Reed’s, expression pleading. “But she turned out okay. Right, Reed? She’s good.”
“That was Cal,” Tanner said, returning to their sides. “He heard back from the Ashton-Drake people. The two dolls, they both belonged to Rachel Sommer.”
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