“Yeah, that’s terrible,” Ryan agreed, his tone dripping with sarcasm. “Who wants to be able to see their girlfriend all the time?”
Carter looked up, his fair eyebrows lifting. “The fact that I didn’t want to see her all the time was a good indicator that it wasn’t meant to be. I don’t regret the relationship…okay, well, yeah. I regret it. I feel like we just got into a groove being friends again, and now she turns around and pulls something like this. I feel horrible. I know I’m going to have to disappoint her tomorrow.”
“Just don’t screw up the deal with Janica Harper.”
“Sarah’s too professional to let anything get in the way of her job.” Carter stood, stretching. “Well, I’m off the clock now. You still meeting with your sister?”
“Yeah, later tonight. I’ll probably go grab some dinner and head over there after.”
“Good luck with that. You want my opinion?”
“You’ll probably give it to me either way.”
Carter grinned, showcasing a row of straight, white teeth. “Bradshaw is going to give us the ad account. He has a long-standing relationship with Bierman Media, and his relationship with your Mom goes back longer than you’ve been alive. Our numbers have already gone up since you did your Ryan Says video last night, so I really don’t think you have much to worry about.”
“You’re probably right.” Ryan checked his phone. Nope; still nothing from Hailey Grant.
“I usually am,” Carter called, stepping out of the office. He swiveled at the door, leaning against the frame. “Hey, did that YouTube girl ever call you back about the gig?”
“No. I’m starting to think she’s not interested.”
Carter chuckled. “She didn’t jump at the chance when you found her at that cafe, so I’d say that’s a safe assumption.”
“Go home,” Ryan said, laughing. His friend threw up a salute and left. Karen gathered her things and waved goodbye before leaving, too, the office growing quieter as the employees drifted out. Pulling open a new tab on his computer he found Hailey’s video and pressed play.
Goosebumps spread down his arms at the sound of her voice, and he closed his eyes, letting the music drift around him, spreading comfort over his body. As the final strains of her song came to a close, he checked his phone. Disappointment slid over him.
Still nothing.
Chapter Six
“Time to brush your teeth,” Hailey said, taking the little plastic praying mantis from Kendra’s small hand and setting it on the kitchen table.
“No, not yet! Just two more bugs?”
“How about you go get fully ready for bed, and then you can glue two more bugs before I tuck you in.”
Kendra paused, tilting her head to the side. “I thought my mom was going to tuck me in tonight.”
Hailey pasted on a smile. “She might. Let me call her while you brush your teeth.”
“Okay!” Kendra hopped up, skipping from the dining room. She jumped up the stairs one step at a time. Amber hadn’t texted yet to say she would be late, so Hailey was hoping she would arrive soon.
The elevator dinged, indicating that someone was coming, and Hailey closed her eyes in relief. Amber was a good mom, but she was a busy one. These moments she spent with Kendra were so important for both of them.
“Hello,” Hailey called after the second ding came. “How was work?”
Ryan stepped into the dining room, his hand casually holding the strap of his messenger bag, his shoulders glistening from rain. “It was fine, thanks.”
Surprise clenched her stomach. “Oh, sorry. I thought you were Amber.”
His mouth tipped in a half-smile. “No worries. You know what would have made my day better?”
“If you hadn’t lost your sandwich on my coat this morning?”
His smile widened. “Yeah, actually. Or if this girl I asked to play for my company party would have just called me and accepted the gig.”
She dropped her gaze to the plastic bugs piled on the table. She should take the gig. A chance like this would never come again. But her pride was ugly and huge and getting in the way of making the wise choice. The guy had been mean—his words had hurt. Making him suffer and not giving him what he wanted was not her best move, but it felt so pleasing.
And if she was being completely honest, the idea of singing for a room of people who worked in the music business when one of them had just called her out for being untrained gave her anxiety.
She looked up and caught his gaze. “I figured you would take my silence as an answer.”
Pulling his bag over his shoulder, he hung it on the back of a chair and started unbuttoning his coat. “Can I at least ask why?”
“Scheduling conflict.” She wasn’t about to tell him that the grandiosity of the event frightened her. She was used to playing in bars, not filled event centers celebrating the fiftieth anniversary of an old family business.
As much as she hated to admit it, Ryan had been right in his critique. She had never been formally trained beyond classes in high school in her small Connecticut town. She was underqualified.
“You can’t change it?” he asked.
“I don’t see how. I’ve already been scheduled to work that evening so Amber and Luis can go to the party.”
“Darn.” He sat on the chair opposite her at the table. “I hadn’t thought of Kendra. Do they not have another babysitter?”
“They’ve never needed one. Not since I started working here, at least.”
Small lines formed between his eyebrows. “Do you never have time off?”
“I don’t really need it, but I usually take a few days off when your mom comes to visit.”
“Well, I’ll talk to my sister—”
“Please don’t.” Hailey’s heart lifted, filling her throat. She never would’ve balked at playing a large event before—this ridiculous self-consciousness was not typical for her—but she couldn’t help it. She had Ryan’s voice in her head on repeat saying how much better she could be with proper training. There was no way she was going to agree to sing for a party of professionals who worked in the music industry.
Her old self—as in, the literal Hailey of yesterday—would’ve jumped at this chance. It was too bad he hadn’t offered her the gig before he’d saddled her with this crippling self-doubt.
“I know we can find someone—”
Kendra started down the stairs. She saw her uncle and moved into a run. “Uncle Ryan! Why are you here? Are you tucking me in tonight?”
He swept his niece into a hug, turning her on her side and tickling her tummy. Between bouts of glorious children’s laughter, he explained. “Your mom told me it was really important for her to be here tonight to tuck you in, so we decided to have our meeting here. Is that okay with you, Kenny?”
“Yes!” She crawled out of his arms, her cheeks flushed and eyes glowing. “Want to see my About Me Christmas Tree?”
“Of course I do.”
She pulled the half-decorated tree over toward her uncle and spun it slowly.
“Wow,” Ryan said, drawing the word out. “That is…something else. I love all the different bugs you used. It’s very original.”
“I was supposed to decorate it with something I love.”
“It looks great.”
She beamed under the praise. The elevator beeped, and Kendra jumped, running from the room.
“Why the bugs?” Ryan asked the moment Kendra left the room. “I thought she’d outgrow that by now.”
“I think her insect infatuation has only grown over the last few years.”
“Thanks for the info. I’ll store that away for Christmas.”
“Her favorites right now are blue morpho butterflies and praying mantises. Get her a gift based on either of those, and she’ll love you for life.”
“And you?” he asked.
“I’m not telling you what I got her for Christmas. You’ll steal my idea.”
He held her gaze. “I meant, what gift
would make you love me for life?”
She crossed her arms over her chest, leaning back in her chair. Did he really just say that? How many ways did she have to reject the guy? Maybe if she cataloged the ways he had broken her spirit and her confidence he would get the hint.
“Oh, I know.” Ryan mocked deep thought, tapping his finger against his chin. “I could set you up with the chance to sing in front of an enormous room of people who work in the music industry. Oh, wait…”
He could not be serious. Amber’s and Kendra’s voices trailed into the dining room; the Martinez women would shortly be in the room. Hailey swallowed the bitterness on her tongue. “Yeah, maybe I would be able to take you up on that incredibly gracious gift if someone hadn’t recently told me that I needed proper training.”
“Wait, I didn’t say—”
“Can we finish the tree tomorrow?” Kendra asked, bounding into the room before her mother.
“I’m sorry, sweetie, but we have to take the tree to school in the morning. Maybe I can glue the last few bugs on it for you. Then they will be totally dry by tomorrow.”
She shrugged. “Okay. My mom is going to read me a story now. Goodnight, Uncle Ryan.” She rounded the table to give him a hug then did the same for Hailey.
Amber slipped off her coat. “Thanks, Hailey. Ryan, I’ll be down in twenty.”
“No worries. I’ve got all night.”
Amber looked relieved and followed her daughter up the stairs. At least Kendra had forgotten about her deal to glue two more bugs on the tree before bed. Hailey took out the glue and globbed it on the body of a black beetle before securing it to the branch and holding it.
“I think we need to talk about this video.” Ryan sat up in his seat, and Hailey could feel the weight of his gaze on her, but she kept her focus on the bug. Fifteen more seconds and she could release the gross little plastic thing.
“There’s nothing to talk about.”
“You are clearly upset about it.” He scoffed. “But I don’t get why. I was doing you a massive favor.”
She glanced up sharply. “I didn’t realize I should appreciate being put down.”
“Being put down? I did nothing but praise you. And my account has a major following, even after being dormant the last few years, so you can thank me for a few thousand views.”
Hailey released the beetle and chose a ladybug next, spinning the tree to find a good, empty spot. Globbing glue on its belly, she stuck it on a branch. “Nothing but praise me?”
“Yeah.”
She had to work hard to refrain from rolling her eyes.
“You seriously don’t think I was praising you? Hailey, your voice blew me away.”
She let go of the ladybug and picked up a centipede. “Pull up the video.”
“What?” He sounded incredulous.
“You want me to prove it? Pull up the video.”
Singing floated their direction from upstairs, Amber singing to her daughter, and Hailey directed her attention back to the bug. She only had three left before the tree would look filled in and she could leave.
Hailey’s song sounded through the speaker of Ryan’s phone, followed shortly by his commentary. The air in the room was stiff, fraught with strained energy, and Hailey kept her attention on the bugs.
“This is interesting. You take the set-up of the girl with the guitar, the Santa hat, and the Christmas song, and you immediately assume she is going to bust out a whiny, metallic song. But her voice is rich. It’s got depth. There’s an element here that makes it unique, but I need to listen more to put my finger on exactly what that is.”
“See?” Ryan said. “Compliments.”
“Now, if you’ll notice here we have a bit of raw emotion showing through. If she was properly trained, this would be more controlled. It wouldn’t jump all over the place.”
“More controlled? Jump all over the place? Ryan, you told me I needed training before I could be taken seriously. If you were comfortable saying that in a video on the internet with massive reach, how do you expect a room of trained musicians to feel about my voice? No.” She stood, leaving the last few bugs off the tree. Kendra could keep those to play with. “Thanks for your magnanimous offer, but I won’t be playing your event.”
He shut his phone off and stood, following her into the foyer as she opened the closet and pulled out her coat. “You are holding on to one minor critique? You didn’t even hear the praise, did you?”
The praise? No, she hadn’t really heard the praise. She’d been too busy smarting from the criticism. Gripping her coat, she turned, locking onto his gaze. “How am I supposed to hear anything positive when you pinpointed my greatest fear about myself, calling me out for the untrained fake that I am?”
“Okay, slow down. You can sing and play, so you aren’t a fake, and there is nothing wrong with being untrained. You have a gift, Hailey.”
She closed her eyes, her mom’s words pressing on her mind. You’ve got a gift, Hailey. God doesn’t hand out talent like yours every day. It was impossible to grow up hearing that all the time and not begin to believe it. So she’d skipped applying for a musical school, thinking she could work hard and make her big break in New York. After years of trying—and failing—to make any headway, she’d begun to doubt her choice. She had a gift, right? But if she had a gift, why was no one interested in her demo?
Because she had never been properly trained. Why would a producer pick her up when there were fifty other girls who sounded just like her, but had been coached into perfection?
“I don’t have more songs prepared, and I don’t think I have enough time to come up with any.”
“You told me you threw that song together. I think you can do it. And besides, the party is on New Year’s Eve so it shouldn’t be all Christmassy anyway.”
“Why do you care so much? Why are you pushing this?”
He took a step closer, his eyes slightly narrowing. Dropping his voice, he held her gaze, his breath caressing her cheek. “Because I think you deserve a chance to make something of yourself, and I can give you that chance.”
A shiver ran down her spine. “What about the negative voices in my head? What should I do about those?”
His breath seemed too shallow, his eyes darting between hers. “Focus on the praise, Hailey. Listen to my video again. Listen for every good thing I said, and then give me your answer.”
Hailey swallowed. He smelled heavenly. Whatever expensive cologne he wore was worth every penny.
“Will you do it?” he asked. “Will you listen again before you make your mind up?”
She nodded, not trusting her voice.
Ryan stepped back, and Hailey reached for her shoes, slipping them on before swiftly pulling on her coat. She drew in a deep breath, catching a hint of his scent as he gave her more space.
“Good luck with your meeting,” she said, nodding toward the dining room.
“Yeah, thanks.”
Hailey punched her code into the elevator keypad and the door immediately opened. She wasn’t sure she could get out of there fast enough. The room had grown thick with tension, her attraction to the critic only developing the longer she spent time with him.
She turned around, leaning against the back wall as he stood in the foyer, his hands in his pockets and his face void of emotion, watching her. The doors closed on him and her eyes drifted shut, ignoring the mistletoe hanging in the elevator and what it made her want to do.
She was in trouble. She had a strong feeling her attraction to Ryan wasn’t going away anytime soon. If she listened for the praise in his video like she promised, it was bound to increase. And that was no good.
Chapter Seven
Nikki sat on the couch with a bowl of popcorn and a Hallmark movie on the television, a peppermint-scented candle burning on the kitchen counter. This scene was such a regular occurrence during December that Hailey thought nothing of it. She liked Christmas, and she loved that her roommate made their home feel so festive.
Hailey dropped her purse on the counter and went to sit next to Nikki in the dim living room. “What a long day.”
Nikki paused the movie, shifting on the couch to face her. “What happened? Did you contact Ryan Says?”
“No. He found me.”
“What?”
“I know. I ran into him outside of the Corner Bakery. You’re never going to believe this.”
“Ugh tell me! I hate it when people say that. It just postpones knowing even longer.”
Hailey grinned, tempted to drag it out. But she didn’t. “Ryan Says is Ryan Bierman, brother to Amber Bierman Martinez, and uncle to Kendra.”
Nikki’s mouth made a perfect circle. “No.”
“Yep.”
“What the actual heck?”
“I know. I got into it with him about how rude his critique was—”
“Rude? He loved your voice.”
Even Nikki thought that? Maybe Hailey should really give him another chance. “I just heard him point out how untrained and flawed I was.”
“Yeah, I think it’s human to fixate on flaws. But I wouldn’t hold that against him. He’s been downright blunt in some of his old videos.”
“Most of them.”
“Precisely, and he was nothing but uplifting in yours.”
Hailey wouldn’t say those words exactly. “He made me promise to listen to his critique again, to look for the praise and then make my decision. But it’s hard. I mean, I don’t know if I have the guts to sing for such a large event. The gig he offered me was for Sound Magazine’s fiftieth-anniversary party.”
“Shut up. Are you kidding me?” Nikki bounced on her seat, her gaze flicking to the stack of Sound Magazines sitting on their coffee table surrounded by Nikki’s editions of Food Weekly. “That’s like if Gordon Ramsay asked me to cook for a dinner party of his favorite restaurateurs. You can’t turn this down, Hailey. It’s a once in a lifetime chance. Think of all the doors it could open for you.”
“Or think about how Ryan could be right, and I’m not trained, and it’ll be obvious to all those well-trained ears.”
Melodies and Mistletoe (Christmas in the City Book 3) Page 5