by J. E. Parker
I took a steadying breath.
You can do this, Shelby. Lucca is depending on you.
Holding Lucca tighter, I stepped out from behind the tree and raised my gun in the air. I aimed for the monster’s chest, keeping my arm steady.
I was terrified, yet my hands didn’t shake.
Determination set in and I knew what I had to do.
Two in the chest and one in the head, I told myself as I laid my finger on the trigger. Don’t let him hurt you again. Protect yourself. Protect Lucca!
“I won’t let you hurt me again,” I whispered to the darkness. “And I will die before I let you hurt my son.” It was the truth. “This ends—now.”
My finger had begun to pull back on the trigger when a deep voice yelled out, startling me. “Sunshine!” It boomed. “What the fuck are you doing?”
I dropped the arm holding the gun to my side.
Shit!
This was bad.
Very, very bad.
8
Anthony
I’d been trailing Shelby for the last ten minutes.
It hadn’t been intentional, but when I saw her pulling out of Lucca’s daycare, I couldn’t resist. I was planning to drive to her house and check out the area she lived in, just to make sure it was safe and that there weren’t any dangers lurking close by.
If there were I intended to park my ass outside of her front door for the foreseeable future. The overwhelming need to protect her and Lucca was crippling.
I know it makes me sound crazy because I didn’t know Shelby or her son, but there was something about her that called to me. Something that demanded I go to her.
Like a moth to a flame, she drew me in.
I didn't understand it and, after spending the last few days doing nothing but trying to decipher my need, my compulsion, to keep her safe, I only ended up confusing myself more.
For a while, I thought it was because of the stuff that happened in New York and the women I’d lost while working in SVU, but I knew that wasn't the reason because I didn’t feel this way with anyone else.
Just her.
Just him.
Just them.
It was insanity, but I was tired of trying to rationalize it. I may not have known why I felt the way I did, but I knew it didn’t feel wrong. In fact, nothing had ever felt more right. The thought of keeping both Shelby and Lucca close—of protecting them, defending them—made my chest warm in a way I’d never experienced before.
I’d been right behind her, following as close as I could without drawing unwanted attention when the little shit blasted through a stoplight a second before it turned red. I, of course, got caught. I was tempted to run it to catch up with her but decided against it. With my luck, someone would recognize me and ask questions.
Questions I didn’t know how to answer.
Questions like, “Why are you following a woman you hardly know?”
Once she made it through the light, Shelby turned right onto Highway 3. After that, I lost sight of her. “Come on.” I tapped my knuckles against the steering wheel as I watched for the light to turn green. “Damn it, hurry the up and change.”
As if on cue, the light changed. I stomped on the gas and sped through the small intersection before taking a right just like Shelby had. The road was narrow but flat and straight, yet there was no sign of her up ahead. Her taillights were gone, vanished.
My girl had a lead foot to match her sassy ass mouth.
I need to put a stop to that shit before she has a wreck.
Pressing my foot down on the accelerator, my Tahoe continued to pick up speed until the needle on the speedometer hovered at the 70-mph mark. “Christ,” I cursed to the empty car. “How fast is she going?”
Mentally, I was ready to blow a gasket when I caught sight of red emergency lights blinking up ahead.
I don’t know how, but I knew it was her.
“Fuck”—I stepped on the gas—“did she wreck?”
My stomach dropped at the thought.
As I got closer, I realized that she hadn’t wrecked—thank Christ—but her truck was stalled on the side of the road. Slowing down, I came to a stop about ten feet from the back of her vehicle. Unbuckling my seatbelt, I reached for the door handle but stopped short of opening it when I caught sight of my girl.
She was standing by the truck with her right hand raised, shielding her eyes.
Even with a pissy look on her face, she was the most gorgeous thing I’d ever laid eyes on. I smiled to myself as my gaze dipped from her brilliant blue eyes to her bee-stung lips that were thinned into a hard line.
I couldn’t wait to kiss her.
Suddenly, a look of panic crossed Shelby’s face, and her eyes lit up with fear.
My smile dropped. “What the hell?”
Turning around, she jumped back into her truck. Perplexed, I sat there and watched her. I didn’t have a clue what she was doing. Heart pounding, I watched as she ripped Lucca out of his car seat and jumped out of the truck without stopping to shut the door.
She looked over her shoulder at me one more time before bolting around the front end and disappearing down the embankment.
She looked terrified.
I jumped out of the car. “Shelby!”
She didn’t answer me, but I heard Lucca whimper.
Moving around the front of her truck, I followed the path she’d taken into the woods. Fresh drag marks were carved into the loose dirt embankment.
Did she fall?
I opened my mouth to call out her name but snapped it shut when she stepped out from behind a large tree. My brows furrowed when she raised her arm in the air. At first, I thought she was about to point at me with her finger.
But then I saw it.
The gun.
Medium sized; matte black.
I recognized it immediately.
A fucking .45, and it was aimed right at me.
Shelby didn’t look scared anymore; now she looked determined and fierce as hell.
“Shit,” I whispered as her finger moved to the trigger.
Like an idiot, I didn’t dive out of the way. Instead, I stood frozen to the spot and screamed as loud as I could. “Sunshine!” At the sound of my yell, her finger stopped short of pulling the trigger. “What the hell are you doing?”
She looked scared to death as she dropped the hand holding the gun to her side. Then her panic-stricken eyes met mine. “Shelby,” I said calmly, extending my arm. “Come here.” Even from thirty feet away I could see her entire body trembling.
She didn’t follow my orders and come like I told her to. Instead, she forced a shaky smile. “Uh, hi.”
Hi? Was she kidding me?
Trying to remain calm, I pointed to the gun hanging loosely in her hand by her side. “You want to tell me why you had that pointed at my head?”
She lifted her hand and looked down at the gun as if just seeing it for the first time. “Oh.” She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and chewed on the plump flesh for a few seconds before releasing it. “I thought you were someone else.”
Her voice was flat, monotone. She didn’t sound like herself at all, and that bugged me almost as much as the loaded gun in her hand did. Without knowing Shelby’s history, I didn’t know if she had a mental health problem that was making her behave this way or what, but I had a feeling—a terrible feeling—that she was in the middle of a PTSD driven panic.
“You thought I was someone else?”
Her eyes moved from side to side, and her head snapped back as if I’d smacked her. “That’s what I said, isn’t it?” As much as I loved her sassy ass mouth, now wasn’t the time, though I was relieved as hell to see her coming back to herself. “Besides, I wasn't aiming at your head.” She paused. “I was aiming at your chest… it being a bigger target and all.”
Three words: What. The. Fuck!
Every cell in my body screamed at me to run to her, to get that damn gun out of her hand, but I knew I couldn’t do t
hat. If I did, she could slip further away from me, into the fear that still had a grip on her psyche, and do something to either hurt herself, Lucca, or me.
Come on, baby. Come back to me.
“And who did you think I was?” I asked, hoping to get useful information from her. I needed to know who she was ready to kill and why. If someone had hurt her, if someone had…
Damn it! I can’t think about it!
Just the thought of someone causing harm to my sunshine had me seeing red.
Shelby ripped her eyes away from mine and looked to the side. A shadow overcame her gorgeous face, and my senses went on high alert. It was apparent she was still fighting something. Just what that something was, I didn’t know.
I held my breath as I watched her close her eyes and take a deep breath. “It doesn’t matter.” Flicking the safety in place, she shoved the gun into the front of her tiny jean shorts and climbed the small embankment with small, careful steps. Miraculously, she made it all the way to the top without slipping on the loose dirt. “Obviously, you’re not him, and I stopped short of filling you with lead so just forget it ever happened.”
Note to self: Find out who ‘him’ is and deal with the son of a bitch.
“Shelby,” I yelled her name in disbelief. “You had a gun aimed at my chest, and you want me to forget that it happened?” I didn’t mean to yell and I damn sure didn’t mean for my tone to be so sharp, but I was barely hanging on. Honest to God, I was teetering on the edge of losing control—something that never happened.
“Yeah.” She forced a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. It looked unnatural on her face. I didn’t like it one bit. “Sounds like a good plan to me. No reason to fuss over it. It’s not a big deal.” She walked back to her truck and leaned against the driver’s door.
Chewing on her right thumbnail, she remained silent for a minute as the humid Georgia air grew thicker, nearly suffocating. Without saying a word, I stared at her, examining her body language. Much as she tried to hide it, she was still scared to death.
She turned to face me. “Hey, do you mind if I use your phone? Mine doesn’t get a signal out here and”—she pointed at her truck—“I'm going to need a ride home.”
I pointed a shaking finger towards my Tahoe. “I’ll take you home.” Her eyes widened to the size of saucers, and I could practically see the wheels in her head turning. “Take Lucca and get in the car. I’ll bring his car seat over there in a minute.”
Just as soon as I calm down.
Shelby readjusted a still sleeping Lucca on her chest and shifted her weight between her feet. She looked nervous, unsure; two things I'd almost bet she never was. “No offense, Anthony, but that’s not a good idea.” She hugged Lucca tighter. “I don’t know you well enough for that.”
You will. Before long, you’ll know me better than you know yourself.
“I won’t hurt you, Shelby.” I pointed at the badge clipped to my belt. “Causing you harm would go against everything I stand for.”
Her eyes dipped to my hip and, even under the blackness surrounding us, I saw her face darken. “Sugar, I know you don’t know me well, but I’ll let you in on a little secret.” She chewed on her bottom lip again and furrowed her brows. “That badge… it doesn’t mean nothing.” Her eyes bored into mine. “Just because you wear it doesn’t mean you abide by what it stands for.”
I didn’t know if she realized it or not, but her statement gave me one hell of a clue about her past. My first guess? She’d either been hurt or let down by an authority figure, most likely a cop. If I found out that was the case, heads would roll, and I’d be the son of a bitch swinging the ax.
Shelby pulled her gaze from mine and looked at the hood of her truck. Her entire body tensed, and her muscles tightened. It didn’t take a genius to see she was on edge.
By the set of her shoulders and the way her eyes kept darting to the space surrounding us, her fear was growing more evident with each passing second. It was like she was waiting for something—or someone—to pop out of the shadows and attack her. Even with me standing less than ten feet away she still didn’t feel safe or secure.
“I mean you seem like you do, but…”
My spine stiffened as her voice trailed off. Was it me she was scared of?
Surely not.
“Shelby”—my voice sounded as rough as sandpaper—“I won’t hurt you, sweetheart.”
Her face twisted into a scowl. “Yeah, that’s what he said too.”
I opened my mouth to ask her exactly who she was talking about when Lucca suddenly woke and began to cry. “Ma-ma!” One of his hands clutched the front of Shelby’s white tank top. “Eat. Seep.” He laid his head back on her chest. The kid looked exhausted. “Seep, Ma-ma!”
Shelby looked from Lucca to me. Uncertainty marred her features.
Stroking her fingers down the column of Lucca’s spine, she whispered, “Can I please use your phone? He hasn’t eaten supper yet, and we’re both exhausted from not sleeping last night. We need to get home.”
I didn’t pull my phone out of my pocket. No way in hell was I going to let her call someone else for help. “I told you I’d take you home.”
Thinning her lips, she stared at the ground and shook her head. This side of Shelby was so different from the sassy and self-assured side I was used too. I didn’t know how to process it.
“I already told you, I don’t know—”
Lucca’s cries grew louder, more frantic. Shelby held him tighter and rubbed his back faster. Her face pinched in frustration. She looked like she was two seconds away from falling into a million pieces.
Time to take control and fix this, Moretti.
Without thinking about what I was doing, I moved to the side of Shelby’s truck and popped open the passenger’s door. Call me an overbearing asshole all you want, but I wasn’t giving her a choice anymore. She’d stand there and fight me the entire night if I did. And neither she nor Lucca needed that. They needed to go home, eat, and get some sleep. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to see how exhausted they both were. Not to mention, after Shelby’s episode minutes earlier, I knew she was probably drained.
Being scared out of your mind will do that to you.
Shelby’s head snapped up, and she finally caught on to what I was doing.
“What the hell!” She stomped around the front of the truck and came to a standstill five feet away from me.
Ignoring her question, I unlatched Lucca’s car seat and dragged it out of the truck. Reaching to the side of the steering wheel, I flicked off her emergency blinkers and locked the driver’s door. After backing out of the car with Lucca’s seat in my arms, I slammed the door and walked back over to my Tahoe.
“Anthony!” she screamed. “What in the good Lord’s name are you doing?”
I still didn’t answer her as I placed the car seat on the Tahoe’s bench seat and locked it in place. When I was finished making sure it was secure, I turned around. “Get in the car.” She opened her mouth—no doubt to argue—but I cut her off. “Not going to argue with you, baby. Come on, it’s time to go.” Stepping back, I walked back to the front of my SUV giving her space.
“I can’t—”
I’d had enough.
My breaking point had been reached.
Placing my hands on the hood of the Tahoe, I looked her in the eyes. “Shelby.” A humorless chuckle spilled from my lips. “Your son is hungry, you’re both exhausted, and we’re standing on the side of a desolate road in the middle of fucking nowhere. Unless you’re planning on letting Lucca go hungry and sleeping in the back of your broken-down truck, I suggest you get your little ass in my vehicle so I can take you home—” I paused for emphasis “—now.”
Her eyes narrowed, and her free hand went to her hip.
Placing my elbows on the hood, I returned the glare she was shooting my way.
Ah hell. Here comes the sass…
“Listen, Mr. Fancy Po-lice Detective,” she hissed, “you are not my da
ddy, you are not my boyfriend, and you sure as shit ain’t my husband.” Pointing her index finger directly at me, she shimmied closer. “Therefore, you don’t get to tell me what to do.”
Lucca quieted. It was as if he sensed the storm brewing all around him. “All that may be true, gorgeous”—I took a step closer—“but I’m telling you, if you don’t climb your little ass into my car, you’ll regret it.”
The side of her mouth quirked up. “Oh yeah?” she asked in a challenging tone. “And what are you going to do to make me regret it?”
Smirking, I crossed my arms over my chest. “I’ll cuff you.”
Her face dropped and her mouth gaped in astonishment. “Excuse me? What do you mean, you’ll cuff me?”
It was a stupid card to play after the way she’d questioned my integrity as a cop moments before, but I did it anyway because there was no way I was letting anyone else come and help her when she had me standing five feet in front of her.
She may not have known it yet, but she was mine and therefore my responsibility.
“Pointing a gun at a cop?” I clicked my tongue against the roof of my mouth. “That’s against the law, sweetheart.”
Her mouth dropped open. “I didn’t know it was you!”
I pointed at my belt again. “Badge is in plain view.” I shrugged. “Besides, I’m not even sure you have a permit for the gun you’ve still got tucked in the front of your shorts.”
Her face blanched, confirming my suspicions.
My girl was carrying illegally.
“You’ve got two options.” I leaned against the front of my SUV. “You either strap Lucca into his seat and then haul your ass into the front with me—” I pulled a toothpick out of my pocket and slipped it between my teeth “—or you can spend a night in county. Your choice.”
Her jaw clenched, and her eyes blazed with anger. “I’ve got a lot of stuff I’d like to say right now.” She glanced down at Lucca. “But it wouldn’t be an appropriate talk to have with a toddler around. Therefore,” she spit out in a pissy tone, “I’ll wait. But you can bet your sweet ass this conversation isn’t over, Detective Moretti.”