Beautiful Disaster

by Laura Spinella

  “It’s not fair. I would tell you anything you want to know, all you have to do is ask. I don’t understand anything about this. I don’t do things like this. It’s insane; I want this more than I want to breathe. But I can’t. Flynn’s law, I’m not allowed to know anything. Not even a real name, a whole name. Nothing.” Mia wiped her nose with the back of her hand, blinking back fear.

  “You’re right.”

  “I am?” she asked, as if she’d never been before.

  “Tell you what. Forget sex exists, in this room or anywhere on the planet, for that matter.”

  “Fat chance,” she mumbled, her eyes swimming over his body.

  “Seriously. Talk to me, Mia. What do you want to know?” He’d probably be the one bolting for the door in the end. Flynn braced for the poking and prodding, the tedious dissection. He would rather face a firing squad. He was expecting a demand for zip codes and blood types, dates of interest, ex-lovers and names that appeared on birth certificates, but nothing like that came.

  “What’s your favorite food?”

  It was blunt and cold, but decidedly answerable. “Fried chicken and mashed potatoes.”

  She nodded; he seemed to have earned a point. Her head came forward off the door. “Favorite band?”

  “All-time or recent?” If it was recent, he was already in trouble.

  She threw him a bone. “Definitely all-time.”

  “Rolling Stones.”

  “Mmm, an alien from another planet could have come up with that answer.” She was unimpressed.

  “When I was a kid I loved the Allman Brothers. I had a cassette tape I used to hide under the covers and listen to at night. I listened to it so much it finally wore out, snapped right in two.”

  “Better.” Her hand released the knob; her shoulder blades inched away from the door. “And in school, what was your best subject?”

  He didn’t hesitate. “Trouble.”

  “I believe you.” She took a small, cautious step forward, still closer to the exit than to him. “And your birthday—just the month.”

  “April,” he said with one deep breath. Then he smiled. “Eighteenth.”

  She smiled back. “Ah, going for bonus points. Okay, your mother, what’s her first name?” A challenge question.

  “Lynette,” he said softly as Mia teetered on the edge of a precipice that led to all things bad. His body tensed, preparing for the next round; his throat went dry. “Do I get a question?”

  “I suppose,” Mia said with a shrug. The fear seemed to be giving way, and she was enjoying the dominant role she was playing.

  “Can I get my beer?”

  “I’ll allow it,” she said. He took two sidesteps and snatched it off the dresser. “What about your father?” Flynn stopped mid-swallow. “What does he do?”

  “Screw up.” She narrowed her eyes at the evasive answer. Flynn took a breath and guzzled a fair amount more. “He’s career Navy. Thirty-odd years in.”

  “Ha, and you’re from Indiana? Not a big port of call.”

  “Only tells you how often we saw him.”

  “Oh, I . . . It wasn’t good when you did? See him, that is.” The game intensified. Mia tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, looked down at her feet, and took a bold step forward. It was a dare.

  “No, it wasn’t.” He hoped it would be enough. She took a tiny step back. Flynn rolled his head in a sweeping gesture of unease, compelled to go on by pure desire. “He used to beat on my mother—and on me, if he was in the mood. Ah, they were both screwups. Even so, she didn’t deserve that. Once, he came home after being gone for three months and found her in bed with another guy. It was quite intentional on her part.” Mia’s eyes grew wider, her expression easy to read. It was the kind of story she’d heard tell about, but never directly. Hell, he’d gone this far. “Torment was the only thing they had in common, and us kids, sort of.”

  She seemed to have forgotten about the game, taking another step in his direction. It was different from the others, uncalculated and sympathetic. “I’m sorry, Flynn. That’s an awful way to grow up.”

  “Doesn’t matter. It’s got nothin’ to do with . . .” He stopped. It was too much information. Let her think a rotten childhood had made him this way, give her a way to explain his rogue existence. It was what she was looking for. He cleared his throat to go on, truth serum again. “Anyway, he blew back into town when I was seventeen; we hadn’t seen him for almost a year. My mother actually had some guy livin’ with us by then. You can imagine the war that set off.” She nodded, keeping very silent, moving yet another step closer. “But this time it took a wrong turn.”

  “How so?”

  “My sister, Julia, she walked into the middle of it. The three of us, we usually made ourselves scarce when stuff like that went down. I’d sneak them into the school, Julia and Alec. We’d sleep on the gym mats. It . . . it was safe. My mother always seemed a little disappointed when we came back the next day.” He exhaled a shaky breath; it wasn’t something he’d ever said aloud. “Julia, she decided she was going to confront the bastard this time. He started whaling on her worse than anything he’d ever done to my mother or me. I couldn’t . . . couldn’t allow that. I didn’t realize until that moment that I was bigger than him, and apparently stronger.”

  “What did you do?”

  He knew where Mia’s mind had gone, to the other night when he went slightly crazy over her remark about hurting someone with his hands. God, sell it to her. She’ ll think that’s all the evil in me, think she’s got it all figured out. Then we can end it. She’ll never have to know the things I’m capable of. “What do you think I did? I beat the living shit out of him. I wasn’t going to let him do that to my sister, to Julia. So I guess that does make me a bit of a liar. The beating, it was quite intentional.” He put the beer on the dresser, folding his arms tight. “Bloodied him up so good he ended up in the hospital.” It was a casual explanation with all the emotional depth of a mud puddle. So, Mia, are you glad you asked? Do you like my family portrait? This ugly story? The trash I come from? And you still don’t know a goddamn thing. “Afterward, Social Services got involved. My mom took his side—but they didn’t. Julia and Alec ended up with my grandparents; I ended up on a bus to Parris Island. It was my choice. I took off, joined the Marines. Figured that would burn my old man good, you know? A career Navy guy with a son in the Marines. It was the best insult I could come up with. Joke was on me. My parents couldn’t sign off fast enough.” Flynn realized he’d said the last part with his eyes closed. When he opened them he was startled to find Mia two steps from his face. What the hell was she doing there, so close to him? She was so goddamn beautiful, and this . . . This showed all the signs of a beautiful disaster. Damn, I shoulda just fucked her when I had the chance.

  Chapter 10

  If Flynn’s body were any more rigid to her touch, he would have snapped in two. Her hands reached up and grasped his biceps, his arms stiffly folded as if he were ready to be entombed. Mia’s arms slid around Flynn, embracing him with all the gentleness his life lacked. Her lips delicately grazed his cheek, nuzzling into the crook of his neck, and she whispered, “I understand you hated every minute of that. I’m sorry, but I’m glad you told me.” Finally, she felt the ground grow a little firmer beneath her feet, leveling off between them. Flynn didn’t respond. She reached around and worked his hair free. It fell around his shoulders like thick, musky woods. She wanted to get lost in it. His skin smelled of soapy detergent and desire. His hair brushed against her face and neck.

  “Mia, be careful.” His eyes were closed tight again. “I will call your bluff. What is it you want?”

  “And here I thought my seduction technique was so smooth. I want you.”

  His sinewy arms unfurled, then gathered around her body like a cocoon. Their lips came together in one of those explosive kisses that apparently was going to define them. Smaller, tender kisses floated over her throat as he reached for the buttons of her eyelet blous
e. Mia pushed his hand away and hastily obliged him, yanking it over her head. Clothing suddenly seemed highly inappropriate, buttons a terrific waste of time. But she wanted equal footing. She grabbed the edge of his T-shirt and ran her hands up underneath until he pulled it off. A few wisps of hair were scattered over a taut chest. Mia moved her fingers over them and down his flat stomach to where a thicker trail of hair disappeared inside the waistband of his jeans.

  She felt powerful and intoxicated as his mouth dusted over her shoulders, breathing those uninhibited feelings into her. The floor was gone. Flynn lifted her entire body in one fluid motion, depositing them both onto the bed. He loomed over her, his eyes ahead of his body, already making love to her. She touched his face and ran her fingers over the broad line of his cheek bone, rustling through the thick mat of his beard, assuring herself that he was real.

  He asked, although he had to know the answer, “Are you sure, Mia? Because another second and I’m not going to be able to stop.” An achy laugh rumbled from his throat. “At least not without causing myself a considerable amount of pain.”

  Between the soft, lingering kisses with which she swathed his hard body, Mia answered, “When I first passed you on the bench ... You remember?”

  “I remember.”

  “This, right here, is what went through my mind. Like a sign. I couldn’t even remember where I was going. It was the best thirty-second fantasy of my life.”

  “Thirty seconds? Damn, I hope I can make it last a little longer than that.”

  They both fell into a moment of breathless laughter before things went quiet. They stared willfully at one another. With his legs straddled on either side of her, Flynn reached over and grabbed a pillow, gently tucking it under her head. This was going to take some time. He eyed the front closure of her bra and deftly snapped it open with one finger. The black satin cups slid away and she watched his face go soft, a silent gulp pass through his throat.

  “Look at you, Mia. My imagination needs work. You’re incredible.” The words went beyond lusty adulation; they were more of that empowerment that he seemed to vicariously pass on to her. She reached for his hands and pulled them toward her. His lips moved hard over her mouth, then like velvet down her neck, his teeth nipping against the silky skin of her shoulder. Mia’s eyes widened at the quick hint of pain, stirring an emotion that definitely wasn’t fear. The tender touch returned as fast and his mouth discovered what it seemed to be searching for, lightly suckling her breasts at first, then more hungrily, aggressively. Her hands tousled in the locks of hair, brushing it back, urging him on.

  With each stroke of his tongue and lips, Mia wanted more. She wanted it to last all night and she wanted it instantly. Her eyes were half closed, indulging in the glowing warmth his touch ignited. The kisses slowed again, and she opened her eyes, daring herself to engage in more than the feeling he brought to her. Looking past her breasts, Mia was startled, never having seen her nipples quite that erect, begging for more on their own. But Flynn had moved on, tiny little kisses now barely touching her skin, his tongue swirling around her navel, his fingers unsnapping her jeans. She began to wiggle out of them with his help, but stopped abruptly, putting her hand on his arm. It wasn’t a sign to stop, more like a guarded pause. Mia’s mind flashed to the late start she’d gotten that morning, the hand that had jammed into a nearly empty underwear drawer. “Oh, I forgot,” she murmured in a panting giggle.

  “Forgot what?”

  Mia didn’t reply; she just nudged at his arm, signaling him to keep going. He glanced up at her face to make sure he understood and then finished stripping away the jeans. “Oh, Mia, tell me you have one in every color for every day of the week. I would have never guessed.” His finger hooked around the lacy edge of a microscopic black thong, tugging at it not so gently.

  Her hands flew up around her face, stifling more girlish giggles. “Well, you have no idea how wrong you’d be. I’m a little behind on my laundry. It was the only thing left in the drawer. A birthday joke from Lanie and Sara. I never put it on before today.”

  “Well, if that’s not a sign,” he said, still examining the provocative lingerie. “Stand up. I want the full view, spinning included.”

  Her hand dropped from her face and she blinked at him, somewhat startled, completely intrigued. “Now? You want me to stand up?”

  “Yeah, well, I can tell you that five minutes from now I’ll be looking at it on the floor. It probably won’t have the same effect.”

  He lay across the bed, propped up on an elbow, waiting for her to comply. From any other man it would have been a demand; from Flynn it was a come-as-you-are invitation. Instead of sliding to the floor, Mia stood right up on the bed, placed her pearly painted toes on his chest, and pushed him down. “I want you to have the best possible angle,” she said, raising an eyebrow at him. Determined to give him the show he seemed so eager to watch, Mia gathered her hair in her hands and piled it up on her head. She arched her back and did a leisurely full turn, her taut breasts jutting out in front of her, the thong doing its part. She dropped the hair, and with her hands riding over her bare cheeks, she turned on the balls of her feet once more. Somehow Flynn leveled inhibitions she would have fought in the privacy of her own bedroom. Mia looked down into his captivated face and fell to her knees. “Enough show?”

  “Enough,” he whispered, slipping his hand around the hollow of her neck, pulling her close and kissing her hard. Mia’s knees went to rubber, quickly giving way. He stood up and pulled off his own jeans. Mia sensed the smolder in her eyes as she gazed over him. She wasn’t feeling the slightest bit shy about what she saw. Flynn was more than she imagined, and in the last eight days she’d imagined quite a lot. Clothes were an insult to his firm, sinewy body. He was one hard muscle of lean definition. Nothing on him was wasted. Mia reached out, instinctively pulling Flynn to her. There was no hesitation as he took her in his arms and laid her on the bed. She shuddered in anxious relief when he picked up where he’d left off, knowing that she needed more, that she wanted his mouth on her breasts, on her stomach.

  “Mia.” He stopped, waiting for her to make eye contact, playfully tugging on the thong with his teeth.

  That deep, soothing voice, it was as sensual as his kiss lapping over her, heightening every sensation. “Hmm, yes?” was all she could manage, completely lost to him.

  “I want . . . I want to make love to you. But first, first I want to take you somewhere else.”

  For a moment she didn’t follow. Surely he didn’t expect her to move, to get out of this bed? But his meaning was swiftly realized. His hands took the place of his teeth, casting the thong to the floor as promised. Flynn’s hands slid between her legs, gently pushing them apart. Suddenly his hot mouth was on the inside of her thighs, kissing them with as much finesse as he’d shown the rest of her body. His fingers expertly delved past warm, wet ringlets, deep inside, to places that made her automatically clench up tight around him. With a shuddering gasp, Mia’s back arched. She had no control, her muscles tightening and melting at the same time. His fingers swirled outside, cleverly finding just the right spot, so delicate and pleasing she thought that surely his hands were made for just this.

  Flynn glanced up at her and smiled. “God, you are so ready for this, Mia. I’ve barely touched you, and look, you’re already right on the edge.”

  She tried to respond, but only a groaning sound of approval would vibrate from her throat. As his mouth took the place of his fingers, she squirmed slightly and pushed away. Or was she pushing toward him? The feeling was too much for one person to handle. He didn’t ease up, holding tight, a growl of satisfaction emanating from within him. Flynn wouldn’t allow her a moment to regain control. She gave in to the fiery stroke of his tongue, falling to sweet surrender, her fingertips sweeping across the top of his head. Muscles she was unaware of ached with expectation as wild uncharted sensations claimed her body.

  Moments later, a wave of passion crashed over her, carrying her
away to some incredible vista, a place she’d never before encountered. It lasted longer than she thought possible, then delivered her safely right back to him. She gasped for a much-needed breath, but he never stopped. His mouth and hands moved fluidly across her skin, taking care to caress any place he might have missed on the way down. Then Flynn’s body was suddenly up over hers, the weight of it reining her in. The look on her face must have startled him as he finally offered a moment’s pause.

  “Mia, you still with me? Are you okay? You, um, you look a little lost,” he whispered, his mouth sucking on her earlobe, the feel of his tongue causing a tremor of aftershock.

  She nodded at first, unable to form words, her hand now shyly covering her eyes. “You were right. I did go someplace else,” she said breathlessly, reaching her arms around his neck, although she wasn’t terribly sure she could hold on. She blinked once, twice. Focusing seemed far too much trouble, but it was a pleased look on his face that came to her clearly. He kissed her again, her taste all over his breath. It was oddly exciting, and she returned his kisses, wondering if it would be like that every time, eager to find out. Her hips began to involuntarily rub against his body, quite like the way a wild animal would tempt its mate. “Flynn, please. Make love to me. I can’t wait anymore. Besides, I’m starting to feel a little guilty, like this is all for me.”

  He grinned and reached over to the nightstand, and a condom appeared out of nowhere. “In a minute,” he said, laying it on the pillow next to them, as if he could wait all day. “I want to know something first. And don’t worry, sweetheart, this all goes toward my turn.”

  “What? What could you possibly want to know at this particular moment?” Frustration colored her voice. Whatever enduring force of nature he was working with plainly wasn’t available to her. She bucked under him, her body serving him with fervent temptation.