Mrs. Western then began to express great Confusion on the Account of Mr. Blifil, and of the Usage which he had received from a Family to which he intended so much Honour. On this Subject she treated the Folly of her Niece with great Severity; but concluded with throwing the whole on her Brother, who, she said, was inexcusable to have proceeded so far without better Assurances of his Daughter’s Consent: ‘But he was (says she) always of a violent, headstrong Temper; and I can scarce forgive myself for all the Advice I have thrown away upon him.’
After much of this Kind of Conversation, which, perhaps, would not greatly entertain the Reader, was it here particularly related, Mr. Blifil took his Leave, and returned home, not highly pleased with his Disappointment; which, however, the Philosophy which he had acquired from Square, and the Religion infused into him by Thwackum, together with somewhat else, taught him to bear rather better than more passionate Lovers bear these Kinds of Evils.
CHAPTER IX.
The Escape of Sophia.
It is now Time to look after Sophia; whom the Reader, if he loves her half so well as I do, will rejoice to find escaped from the Clutches of her passionate Father, and from those of her dispassionate Lover.
Twelve Times did the iron Register of Time beat on the sonorous Bell-metal, summoning the Ghosts to rise, and walk their nightly Round.—In plainer Language, it was Twelve o’Clock, and all the Family, as we have said, lay buried in Drink and Sleep, except only Mrs. Western, who was deeply engaged in reading a political Pamphlet, and except our Heroine, who now softly stole down Stairs, and having unbarred and unlocked one of the House Doors, sallied forth, and hastened to the Place of Appointment.
Notwithstanding the many pretty Arts, which Ladies sometimes practise, to display their Fears on every little Occasion, (almost as many as the other Sex uses to conceal theirs) certainly there is a Degree of Courage, which not only becomes a Woman, but is often necessary to enable her to discharge her Duty. It is, indeed, the Idea of Fierceness, and not of Bravery, which destroys the Female Character: For who can read the Story of the justly celebrated Arria,1 without conceiving as high an Opinion of her Gentleness and Tenderness, as of her Fortitude? At the same Time, perhaps, many a Woman who shrieks at a Mouse, or a Rat, may be capable of poisoning a Husband; or, what is worse, of driving him to poison himself.
Sophia, with all the Gentleness which a Woman can have, had all the Spirit which she ought to have. When, therefore, she came to the Place of Appointment, and, instead of meeting her Maid, as was agreed, saw a Man ride directly up to her, she neither screamed out, nor fainted away: Not that her Pulse then beat with its usual Regularity; for she was, at first, under some Surprize and Apprehension: But these were relieved almost as soon as raised, when the Man, pulling off his Hat, asked her, in a very submissive Manner, ‘If her Ladyship did not expect to meet another Lady?’ And then proceeded to inform her, ‘that he was sent to conduct her to that Lady.’
Sophia could have no possible Suspicion of any Falshood in this Account: She therefore mounted resolutely behind the Fellow, who conveyed her safe to a Town about Five Miles distant, where she had the Satisfaction of finding the good Mrs. Honour: For as the Soul of the Waiting-woman was wrapt up in those very Habiliments which used to enwrap her Body, she could by no means bring herself to trust them out of her Sight. Upon these, therefore, she kept Guard in Person, while she detached the aforesaid Fellow after her Mistress, having given him all proper Instructions.
They now debated what Course to take, in order to avoid the Pursuit of Mr. Western, who, they knew, would send after them in a few Hours. The London Road had such Charms for Honour, that she was desirous of going on directly; alledging, that as Sophia could not be missed till Eight or Nine the next Morning, her Pursuers would not be able to overtake her, even though they knew which Way she had gone. But Sophia had too much at Stake to venture any Thing to Chance; nor did she dare trust too much to her tender Limbs, in a Contest which was to be decided only by Swiftness. She resolved, therefore, to travel across the Country, for at least twenty or thirty Miles, and then to take the direct Road to London. So, having hired Horses to go twenty Miles one Way, when she intended to go twenty Miles the other, she set forward with the same Guide, behind whom she had ridden from her Father’s House; the Guide having now taken up behind him, in the Room of Sophia, a much heavier, as well as much less lovely Burthen; being, indeed, a huge Portmanteau, well stuffed with those outside Ornaments, by means of which the fair Honour hoped to gain many Conquests, and, finally, to make her Fortune in London City.
When they had gone about Two hundred Paces from the Inn, on the London Road, Sophia rode up to the Guide, and, with a Voice much fuller of Honey than was ever that of Plato, though his Mouth is supposed to have been a Bee-hive,2 begged him to take the first Turning which led towards Bristol.
Reader, I am not superstitious, nor any great Believer of modern Miracles. I do not, therefore, deliver the following as a certain Truth; for, indeed, I can scarce credit it myself: But the Fidelity of an Historian obliges me to relate what hath been confidently asserted. The Horse, then, on which the Guide rode, is reported to have been so charmed by Sophia’s Voice, that he made a full Stop, and exprest an Unwillingness to proceed any farther.
Perhaps, however, the Fact may be true, and less miraculous than it hath been represented; since the natural Cause seems adequate to the Effect: For as the Guide at that Moment desisted from a constant Application of his armed Right Heel, (for, like Hudibras, he wore but one Spur)3 it is more than possible, that this Omission alone might occasion the Beast to stop, especially as this was very frequent with him at other Times.
But if the Voice of Sophia had really an Effect on the Horse, it had very little on the Rider. He answered somewhat surlily, ‘That Measter had ordered him to go a different Way, and that he should lose his Place, if he went any other than that he was ordered.’
Sophia finding all her Persuasions had no Effect, began now to add irresistible Charms to her Voice; Charms, which, according to the Proverb, makes the old Mare trot, instead of standing still;4 Charms! to which modern Ages have attributed all that irresistible Force, which the Antients imputed to perfect Oratory. In a Word, she promised she would reward him to his utmost Expectation.
The Lad was not totally deaf to these Promises; but he disliked their being indefinite: For tho’ perhaps he had never heard that Word; yet that in Fact was his Objection. He said, ‘Gentlevolks did not consider the Case of poor Volks; that he had like to have been turned away the other Day, for riding about the Country with a Gentleman from Squire Allworthy’s, who did not reward him as he should have done.’
‘With whom?’ says Sophia eagerly—‘With a Gentleman from Squire Allworthy’s,’ repeated the Lad; ‘the Squire’s Son, I think, they call’un.’—‘Whither? which Way did he go?’ says Sophia. ‘Why a little o’ one Side o’ Bristol, about twenty Miles off,’ answered the Lad.—‘Guide me,’ says Sophia, ‘to the same Place, and I’ll give thee a Guinea, or two, if one is not sufficient.’ ‘To be certain,’ said the Boy, ‘it is honestly worth two, when your Ladyship considers what a Risk I run; but, however, if your Ladyship will promise me the two Guineas, I’ll e’en venture: To be certain it is a sinful Thing to ride about my Master’s Horses; but one Comfort is, I can only be turned away, and two Guineas will partly make me Amends.’
The Bargain being thus struck, the Lad turned aside into the Bristol Road, and Sophia set forward in Pursuit of Jones, highly contrary to the Remonstrances of Mrs. Honour, who had much more Desire to see London, than to see Mr. Jones: For indeed she was not his Friend with her Mistress, as he had been guilty of some Neglect in certain pecuniary Civilities, which are by Custom due to the Waiting-gentlewoman in all Love Affairs, and more especially in those of a clandestine Kind. This we impute rather to the Carelessness of his Temper, than to any Want of Generosity; but perhaps she derived it from the latter Motive. Certain it is that she hated him very bitterly on that Account, and re
solved to take every Opportunity of injuring him with her Mistress. It was therefore highly unlucky for her, that she had gone to the very same Town and Inn whence Jones had started, and still more unlucky was she, in having stumbled on the same Guide, and in this accidental Discovery which Sophia had made.
Our Travellers arrived at Hambrook* at the Break of Day, where Honour was against her Will charged to enquire the Rout which Mr. Jones had taken. Of this, indeed, the Guide himself could have informed them; but Sophia, I know not for what Reason, never asked him the Question.
When Mrs. Honour had made her Report from the Landlord, Sophia, with much Difficulty, procured some indifferent Horses, which brought her to the Inn, where Jones had been confined rather by the Misfortune of meeting with a Surgeon, than by having met with a broken Head.
Here Honour being again charged with a Commission of Enquiry, had no sooner applied herself to the Landlady, and had described the Person of Mr. Jones, than that sagacious Woman began, in the vulgar Phrase, to smell a Rat. When Sophia therefore entered the Room, instead of answering the Maid, the Landlady addressing herself to the Mistress began the following Speech. ‘Good-lack-a-day! why there now, who would have thought it! I protest the loveliest Couple that ever Eye beheld. I-fackins, Madam, it is no Wonder the Squire run on so about your Ladyship. He told me indeed you was the finest Lady in the World, and to be sure so you be. Mercy on him, poor Heart, I bepitied him, so I did, when he used to hug his Pillow, and call it his dear Madam Sophia.—I did all I could to dissuade him from going to the Wars: I told him there were Men enow that were good for nothing else but to be killed, that had not the Love of such fine Ladies.’ ‘Sure,’ says Sophia, ‘the good Woman is distracted.’ ‘No, no,’ cries the Landlady, ‘I am not distracted. What, doth your Ladyship think I don’t know then? I assure you he told me all.’ ‘What saucy Fellow,’ cries Honour, ‘told you any thing of my Lady?’ ‘No saucy Fellow,’ answered the Landlady, ‘but the young Gentleman you enquired after, and a very pretty young Gentleman he is, and he loves Madam Sophia Western to the Bottom of his Soul.’ ‘He love my Lady! I’d have you to know, Woman, she is Meat for his Master.’—‘Nay, Honour,’ said Sophia, interrupting her, ‘don’t be angry with the good Woman; she intends no Harm.’ ‘No, marry don’t I,’ answered the Landlady, emboldened by the soft Accents of Sophia; and then launched into a long Narrative too tedious to be here set down, in which some Passages dropt, that gave a little Offence to Sophia, and much more to her Waiting-woman, who hence took Occasion to abuse poor Jones to her Mistress the Moment they were alone together, saying, ‘that he must be a very pitiful Fellow, and could have no Love for a Lady, whose Name he would thus prostitute in an Ale-house.’
Sophia did not see his Behaviour in so very disadvantageous a Light, and was perhaps more pleased with the violent Raptures of his Love (which the Landlady exaggerated as much as she had done every other Circumstance) than she was offended with the rest; and indeed she imputed the whole to the Extravagance, or rather Ebullience of his Passion, and to the Openness of his Heart.
This Incident, however, being afterwards revived in her Mind, and placed in the most odious Colours by Honour, served to heighten and give Credit to those unlucky Occurrences at Upton, and assisted the Waiting-woman in her Endeavours to make her Mistress depart from that Inn without seeing Jones.
The Landlady finding Sophia intended to stay no longer than till her Horses were ready, and that without either eating or drinking, soon withdrew; when Honour began to take her Mistress to Task, (for indeed she used great Freedom) and after a long Harangue, in which she reminded her of her Intention to go to London, and gave frequent Hints of the Impropriety of pursuing a young Fellow, she at last concluded with this serious Exhortation: ‘For Heaven’s Sake, Madam, consider what you are about, and whither you are going.’
This Advice to a Lady who had already rode near forty Miles, and in no very agreeable Season, may seem foolish enough. It may be supposed she had well considered and resolved this already; nay, Mrs. Honour, by the Hints she threw out, seemed to think so; and this I doubt not is the Opinion of many Readers, who have, I make no Doubt, been long since well convinced of the Purpose of our Heroine, and have heartily condemned her for it as a wanton Baggage.
But in Reality this was not the Case. Sophia had been lately so distracted between Hope and Fear, her Duty and Love to her Father, her Hatred to Blifil, her Compassion, and (why should we not confess the Truth?) her Love for Jones; which last the Behaviour of her Father, of her Aunt, of every one else, and more particularly of Jones himself, had blown into a Flame, that her Mind was in that confused State, which may be truly said to make us ignorant of what we do, or whither we go, or rather indeed indifferent as to the Consequence of either.
The prudent and sage Advice of her Maid, produced, however, some cool Reflection; and she at length determined to go to Gloucester, and thence to proceed directly to London.
But unluckily a few Miles before she entered that Town, she met the Hack-Attorney, who, as is before mentioned, had dined there with Mr. Jones. This Fellow being well known to Mrs. Honour, stopt and spoke to her; of which Sophia at that Time took little Notice, more than to enquire who he was.
But having had a more particular Account from Honour of this Man afterwards at Gloucester, and hearing of the great Expedition he usually made in travelling, for which (as hath been before observed) he was particularly famous; recollecting likewise, that she had overheard Mrs. Honour inform him, that they were going to Gloucester, she began to fear lest her Father might, by this Fellow’s Means, be able to trace her to that City; wherefore if she should there strike into the London Road, she apprehended he would certainly be able to overtake her. She therefore altered her Resolution; and having hired Horses to go a Week’s Journey, a Way which she did not intend to travel, she again set forward after a light Refreshment, contrary to the Desire and earnest Entreaties of her Maid, and to the no less vehement Remonstrances of Mrs. Whitefield, who from good Breeding, or perhaps from good Nature (for the poor young Lady appeared much fatigued) press’d her very heartily to stay that Evening at Gloucester.
Having refreshed herself only with some Tea, and with lying about two Hours on the Bed, while her Horses were getting ready, she resolutely left Mrs. Whitefield’s about Eleven at Night, and striking directly into the Worcester Road, within less than four Hours arrived at that very Inn where we last saw her.
Having thus traced our Heroine very particularly back from her Departure, till her Arrival at Upton, we shall in a very few Words bring her Father to the same Place; who having received the first Scent from the Post-boy, who conducted his Daughter to Hambrook, very easily traced her afterwards to Gloucester; whence he pursued her to Upton, as he had learned Mr. Jones had taken that Rout, (for Partridge, to use the Squire’s Expression, left every where a strong Scent behind him) and he doubted not in the least but Sophia travelled, or, as he phrased it, ran the same Way. He used indeed a very coarse Expression, which need not be here inserted; as Fox-hunters, who alone would understand it, will easily suggest it to themselves.
BOOK XI.
Containing about three Days.
CHAPTER I.
A Crust for the Critics.
In our last initial Chapter, we may be supposed to have treated that formidable Set of Men, who are called Critics, with more Freedom than becomes us; since they exact, and indeed generally receive, great Condescension from Authors. We shall in this, therefore, give the Reasons of our Conduct to this august Body; and here we shall perhaps place them in a Light, in which they have not hitherto been seen.
This Word Critic is of Greek Derivation, and signifies Judgment. Hence I presume some Persons who have not understood the Original, and have seen the English Translation of the Primitive, have concluded that it meant Judgment in the legal Sense, in which it is frequently used as equivalent to Condemnation.
I am the rather inclined to be of that Opinion, as the greatest Number of Critics hath of
late Years been found amongst the Lawyers. Many of these Gentlemen, from Despair, perhaps, of ever rising to the Bench in Westminster-hall, have placed themselves on the Benches at the Playhouse, where they have exerted their judicial Capacity, and have given Judgment, i.e. condemned without Mercy.
The Gentlemen would perhaps be well enough pleased, if we were to leave them thus compared to one of the most important and honourable Offices in the Commonwealth, and, if we intended to apply to their Favour, we would do so; but as we design to deal very sincerely and plainly too with them, we must remind them of another Officer of Justice of a much lower Rank; to whom, as they not only pronounce, but execute their own Judgment, they bear likewise some remote Resemblance.
But in reality there is another Light, in which these modern Critics may with great Justice and Propriety be seen; and this is that of a common Slanderer. If a Person who prys into the Characters of others, with no other Design but to discover their Faults, and to publish them to the World, deserves the Title of a Slanderer of the Reputations of Men; why should not a Critic, who reads with the same malevolent View, be as properly stiled the Slanderer of the Reputation of Books?
The History of Tom Jones (Penguin Classics) Page 64