by M Helbig
While I normally don’t respond well to rudeness, I had a feeling she was someone important and not the kind of person you’d want as an enemy. Besides, I had other things to deal with then—even if I couldn’t quite remember what they were—and her blunt statement happened to coincide with what I wanted anyway. I spun around without another word and dipped around the huge hedge that made up the third side of the alcove.
The sound of boots echoed across the marble leading back to where I’d come from. I decided to peek around the corner of the hedge as curiosity got the better of me. While I tried to remember what I was looking for again, the answer appeared around the bend. Decrona!
About to rush out and confront her, I caught the blue gleam of the scary woman’s armor. Decrona was headed right toward her, so I came up with a new plan—a brilliant plan not at all based on cowardice: I’d let her bully Decrona with her intimidating high-levelness and then when Decrona staggered out like I had, I’d confront her. She’d be too disoriented to put up much of a fight and would then tell me everything.
I missed getting the satisfaction of seeing Decrona’s reaction as Olaf grumbled into group chat, “The clerk has not seen anyone enter in the last hour. Have you any luck out there?”
“Just saw her,” I responded. “I’ve got one way blocked off. Come outside and wait by the door to the left, in case she retreats back that way.”
“Understood.”
I turned my attention back to Decrona and was surprised to find her neither cowering, stuttering, nor running away. She stood directly before the woman and attempted to match her glare, though Decrona’s came out ridiculous rather than imperious. I expected the woman to respond in much the same way she’d responded to my presence—and the way her mouth was twitching, it appeared she wanted nothing more than to do just that—but after a long moment of eerie silence, she finally nodded in acknowledgement.
Decrona’s eyes finally tired from the glaring and blinked. “Cedra, excellent to see you.”
Cedra stared at Decrona impassively. “Get to the point now.”
“I have little time for your arrogance. We’re partners in this, and I expect a little respect.” Decrona’s action did not match her bravado as she flinched in response to an imaginary movement.
“Did you get her?” Olaf asked in group chat.
“Her, who?” Alizia asked.
“No, there’s someone else here,” I replied. “We’ll explain later, Alizia. Olaf, sit tight. For now, keep the channel clear so I don’t miss anything. I’m recording everything.”
“Sure,” they both said.
“Your associate is my partner,” Cedra said. “Let’s get this distasteful meeting over with. What. Do. You. Want?”
“We’ve fulfilled our part of the bargain. It’s your turn.”
Cedra attempted to bore a hole through Decrona with her eyes. “You told my lieutenant that half an hour ago, and he told you we already know it. Do not call a meeting with me to repeat what I already know.”
Decrona cleared her throat nervously. “Right. Of course. But you may be interested to know about this.” A puff of smoke appeared over her right hand to reveal a small box. She opened it slowly and a blinding light spilled out. I couldn’t see what was causing it, as Cedra leaned in to block my view.
“Is this what I think it is?” Cedra asked in awe.
Decrona smiled. “Exactly what we were looking for.”
“So, the rumors were true.” As her hand moved toward the box, Decrona abruptly shut it, and it disappeared in a puff of smoke back to her inventory.
The quiver in Decrona’s voice had completely evaporated, and she returned to her normal, confident tone. “Now. Now. This is ours. I only wanted you to see it as proof. So, as you can see, we were not bluffing and are ready. Are you?”
A barely perceptible smile emerged from the corners of Cedra’s mouth. “We are. Perhaps I’ve underestimated you. Where did you find it?”
Her awe at the object had built Decrona’s confidence to the point she felt she could pat Cedra on the shoulder. With an almost imperceptible motion, Cedra intercepted her arm and twisted it behind her back. Decrona let out a pathetic squeak.
“Do not touch me, worm,” Cedra growled. “That is impressive, but don’t think I regard you as anything more than the putrid peon that you are. Do you have anything else to tell me or may I go back to the more enjoyable company of the beggars surrounding my hall?”
“No, that was it,” Decrona groaned out. “We’re back on course.”
Cedra released Decrona and pushed her forward with minimal force. Decrona shot forward twenty feet, almost connecting with the library’s wall. By the time she turned around, the sound of Cedra’s boots tapping on the marble floor had almost completely faded.
Decrona leaned down, put her hands on her thighs, and began panting heavily. Catching Olaf’s motion from the other direction into the alcove, I darted around the hedge to confront Decrona and cut off her last angle of retreat.
“I heard the tail end. What the heck was that about?” Olaf asked.
Decrona’s head shot up and her eyes widened as she took in Olaf and me. She shook her head in disbelief and let out a manic laugh. “As if that wasn’t difficult enough.”
I grabbed Decrona. “Why did you lie to us about heading back to Fen? And what is this plan you’ve been working on with that Cedra?”
Decrona stared at my hand in shock. “Oh, that. I was already through the gate, grouped up with some clueless morons when I received a message. One of my other contacts said he had an important task for me, so I raced back here. You two happened to come in at the end of my completing it. Speaking of contacts, did I tell you what I learned from the one in Fen?”
Olaf’s unconvincing attempt at a scowl faded and he reverted to his usual smile. “What did your contact tell you?”
“That the character named ‘Oskar’ was rarely ever seen outside of the company of his best friend named Repsak.”
“Repsak is Kasper spelled backward. Now that you mention it, I remember my son using that name in other games. That must be him!” Olaf folded Decrona in a huge hug. “You are the best.”
“And what was this secret plan you were talking to Cedra about?” I asked.
Decrona shrugged. “Hmm—oh, her guild was reluctant to join the rest of our Sun forces at Fen. I was sent to remind Cedra of a favor she owed so that her guild would go help in the defense of Fen.”
“Who’re you guys talking to?” Alizia asked through group chat.
“Decrona,” Olaf responded. “She came back to Highwall for an emergency mission from one of her contacts—convincing a major guild to head toward Fen and save it.” Olaf turned to Decrona. “I’m telling Alizia what’s going on.”
“Ahh,” Decrona said. “Tell her I said hi, and that I miss her.”
“Tell Decrona I said she’s high and I don’t miss her,” Alizia said.
Olaf patted Decrona on the shoulder. “Alizia said she misses you too. And we all really appreciate everything you did.”
I sent Alizia and Olaf my recording of Decrona’s meeting with Cedra and decided to start recording again to show Alizia this part later. “Yeah, we really appreciate it,” I said, trying my best to hide the skepticism in my voice. Olaf bought it, but I wasn’t sure if Decrona did. “By the way, what was in that box you showed Cedra? Was it valuable?”
“Box?” Olaf asked. “What box?”
Decrona’s eyes lit up but quickly returned to normal. “It’s not worth much monetarily, yet it has value to Cedra’s guild, The Knights of Bass Kicking, for a very specific endeavor they are about to embark on.”
“Bass Kicking?” I said in both group chat and out loud. “What kind of stupid name is that?”
Alizia’s laughter was so raucous it almost knocked me over.
“You must still have the profanity filter turned on,” Olaf said through a chuckle. “There’s no B in that name, Horus. When you have the filter on, the g
ame converts profanity into the closest non-curse word.”
“Decrona is a ducking, pitch, basshole,” Alizia said. “Spit. Duck. Punt. Punt. Punt.”
“Thank you,” I said to Alizia. Decrona unsurprisingly seemed to know exactly what I was talking about. “Now, what was that plan you mentioned to Cedra?”
Decrona shrugged awkwardly. “The plan is too complicated to explain. You’re just going to have to trust me.”
“Try me,” I said.
Backing away into the hedge, Decrona started as one of the branches poked her. When she realized it wasn’t a person, she turned back toward us and sighed. “That was poor wording. My apologies. I meant that it’d take a long time to explain, but if you really want to hear it, I could explain it over drinks at our usual inn. I can assure you it isn’t very interesting, but I’m more than happy to, as I know how this must look to you. The end result will be that my contact will owe me greatly and be much more enthusiastic about finding information on your two problems.”
Olaf nodded slowly. “That sounds reasonable—wait! What about returning to Fen? Nyytro’s probably headed there. Not to mention rejoining our corpses to get all of that money back.”
“My word,” Decrona said. “I almost completely forgot about that! I have almost thirty gold on my corpse. Not to mention what Alizia is probably doing to it. Let’s go now, and I can tell you about everything afterward.”
“Speaking of Alizia,” Olaf said. “She’s been suspiciously quiet for the last few minutes. Either she’s been watching the recording Horus sent us earlier, or she’s up to something. Alizia, what is my corpse currently wearing?”
A huge figure leaped out from behind me. Decrona jumped back into the hedge, which startled her further and caused her to bounce forward into the tall figure. The “attacker” barely caught Decrona, as she was too busy laughing hysterically.
I put away my sword when I realized who it was. “Alizia? Why aren’t you still in Fen?”
She slapped Decrona on the back, which only made her shake worse. “The Shadows waited until almost everyone was in the center of the city, then set off a bunch of magic bombs. Good news is they took out a lot of their own people too. If those Bass Kickers Deccy sent show up soon, they might be able to retake what’s left of Fen. I died about five minutes ago. Oh, and to answer Olaf’s question, his corpse was wearing my best powdered wig. He makes a very fetching Marie Antoinette. Or at least he did before several tons of green rubble landed on him.”
“Tragic,” Decrona said. “But if you leave now, you can join the Bass Kickers. And regain Olaf’s corpse.”
“Yes! We can show those Shadow Connies what the Sun is all about.” Olaf shook his fist in the air.
I pushed his arm down. “You mean, get Olaf’s corpse and yours. Right, Decrona?”
She shuffled nervously and looked like she was about to speak, but Alizia interrupted. “At our level, we’d be lucky to stub one of their toes as they run us over. Barely any of the Shadows I saw were under level twenty, and if our biggest guilds are finally making their way there, then chances are so are theirs. Best bet is to wait until the fighting is over in a few hours. That should give Deccy plenty of time to spill the beans on her ‘secret’ plan. My guess it involves her trying to get them to change the law so she can marry a book or three. To the bar, and lots of alcohol!”
“Agreed,” I said. “I want to hear all about this plan of hers.”
“I did want to see some of that large-scale PvP,” Olaf said. “But we should hear Decrona’s story now, so that you two can put your doubts aside. Group unity is very important.”
Alizia knocked off Decrona’s pointy hat and gave her a noogie. Decrona flailed her arms but eventually broke free and began panting furiously. Alizia picked Decrona’s hat from the ground and slapped it back on her head.
After a few failed attempts, Decrona finally regained her composure and managed to form words. “That is more than fair. If you can give me half an hour, I’ll join you at our usual haunt. I must let my contact know that Cedra has agreed.”
Decrona tried to walk past me, but I pushed her back. “That can wait. There’s no reason why you can’t just send him a message telling him that on the way.”
Olaf got between us. “Horus, I know Decrona’s story is a little hard to believe, but she has never given us reason to distrust her before.”
“Thank you, Olaf,” Decrona said. “To answer your question, this group of contacts tends to be a bit paranoid and has turned off the messaging feature. They’re convinced Pyrite is reading our messages. They sent their order to me verbally through a messenger. A bit of an odd bunch, but they do have information and resources no one else has.”
I begrudgingly nodded. “My dad worked for Pyrite, and they do have bots checking messages for people trying to exploit bugs, spread hate speech, and a lot of other things. That part makes sense at least, but why does a group with so many resources need a newbie like you?”
Decrona puffed her chest up. “Because I’m a woman brimming with unique talents and unsurpassed intellect, and being so good at gathering information, they recognized that talent and recruited me.”
Alizia burst into laughter, and despite my anger, I couldn’t help but join her. Olaf pretended to see something interesting in the distance and turned away.
Decrona crossed her arms and pouted. “Fine. My brother went to school with one of them in the real world, and he talked them into letting me join. But they’ve since come to appreciate my unique talents. I was assigned this task as go-between with the Bass Kickers after many other operatives quit due to Cedra’s unique personality. Now, if you don’t mind, I need to meet with them as quickly as possible so I can continue to be in their good graces.” She tried to slip past me again, but again I blocked her. I could see Alizia’s shadow looming behind me as backup.
“If they’re that good at finding information, they’ll know when the Bass Kickers leave. Most of the town probably will,” I said. “But while your story does make sense, there’s still quite a few holes in it. Like, what is your group’s plan? You mentioned to Cedra they were ready after the Bass Kickers completed their part. What precisely is that object you’re holding, and why would your group trust a low-level person like you with it?”
Alizia moved next to me and crossed her arms. “Yeah! What’s in that box, and more importantly, does it match any of my outfits? You’re coming with us now, missy.”
Olaf rushed in between us. “Hold on. This is Decrona. Our friend. She’s given us no reason to doubt her.”
Alizia coughed something that the profanity filter translated into “gull spit.” I’d been meaning to figure out how to turn the filter off, but that one made me smile, so I decided to leave it on. At a time like this, I needed a laugh.
Decrona sighed. “If you let me go now, drinks are on me for the rest of the night.”
Alizia cheered. “Let her go, Horus. I want try out my newest invention, and it requires liquid gold and liquid silver as the final ingredients. If she bails on us, I’ll track her down and make her taste-test it.”
It looked at Olaf’s smiling face and my resolve melted. We did owe her for her help with his son. Worst-case scenario, she’d leave and never come back. We could always replace her. I moved out of the way. “Fine.”
“Thank you all,” Decrona said. “And I swear by the lives of my mother and my father, that I will return.”
As much as I didn’t believe most of what she’d told us, it would be hard for me to piece together what she was doing without her telling us more. Unlike her, I didn’t have any contacts or friends in the game outside this group. Even if she was up to no good, there was little chance it had anything to do with our more pressing concerns—like finding Nyytro or discovering what had happened to Olaf’s son.
“Decrona will come through,” Olaf said as we neared the entrance to the library. “She always has before.”
Alizia rubbed her hands together and grinned. �
��Yeah! And if she doesn’t show, Olaf can pay for our drinks instead, since he vouched for her. Then we can hunt Decrona down like a dog and do naughty—naughtier things to her. It’s a win/win.”
As Decrona disappeared in the distance, we turned the opposite way and headed toward our usual place. The peaceful, mostly empty streets and the bright blue sky brightened my mood. As Alizia playfully stole Olaf’s dagger and raced in circles around me with him laughing in pursuit, I knew without a doubt that even without Decrona we’d be fine.
The Surprise? It Won’t Exactly Be Worth It, But It Won’t Not Be Worth It
When we passed through the Military District, I decided to make a quick stop at my trainer to get my new Cure Poison spell for level seven. Olaf and Alizia stopped at their trainers as well. Alizia learned Shield Slam so she could use her shield as a weapon with a chance to stun opponents, and Olaf learned Sneak Attack to do extra damage when undetected.
We arrived at the bar fifteen minutes before Decrona was supposed to meet us. I double-checked the clock in the interface again five minutes after that, and then again a few minutes later. As the agreed upon half an hour got closer and closer, I became more and more sure she wasn’t going to show. Neither of my friends seemed in the least bit worried, though Olaf would likely trust the sleaziest used car salesman as long as he gave his word of honor and Alizia was already on her second “Dragon Fart” (another one of her inventions that involved absinthe, healing potion, and a smoky substance that looked like dry ice). Olaf tried in vain to get me to stop staring at the door. When I refused, Alizia used that as a sign to snatch my drink.
“So, what’s the plan if she doesn’t show?” I asked.
Olaf flagged down the waitress and ordered me another. “She will show, friend.”
“We’ll do this to her.” Alizia stood up and tried to take a step forward. The group behind us were fellow regulars and well prepared for her antics. With practiced precision, they managed to shift their table so that Alizia didn’t take it along on the way down. Their drinks safe, two of the dwarves tried to help her up. They only managed to get her back in her seat when a familiar beaverkin joined in.