by Skye Jordan
She smiled up at him. “We’re here for you. Anytime for anything. If she is yours and you choose to be part of her life, she’ll be grandfathered into the Renegades. That might not carry much weight in court, but in the real world, you’ll always know you’ve got a wall of muscle and heart behind you both, wherever you go.”
He hugged her again, and his eyes stung like they did when he first opened them under water. “God damn, you’re going to give me a panic attack.”
She patted his back. “One step at a time.”
When Grace disappeared into the bedroom, Josh gestured Zach out onto the lanai. Exhausted now, he joined Josh and dropped to the edge of a deck chair and propped his elbows on his thighs. “I fuckin’ need this job, Josh.”
“Slow down. We don’t even know if the girl is yours yet.”
“Jesus, I feel like I’m pinned beneath a pipeline.”
“Something’s pushing your buttons,” Josh said. “Something beyond the obvious. What is it?”
He thought for a minute, staring at his hands clasped between his knees. “I believe her. Tessa,” he clarified. He lifted his gaze and met Zach’s. “At first, I didn’t. At first, I thought she was just a crazy chick who’d heard about the possibility that I’d get a part and wanted to cash in. But then I go back to our night together and the way she talked about Sophia when she supposedly didn’t know I was me…”
His mind drifted—to the way she’d massaged and stretched his shoulder for him. The way she’d kissed him from shoulders to toes when he’d been laid out on his belly, catching his breath, then stretched out on top of him. The way she’d laughed when he’d flipped her. They hadn’t talked about anything deep or complicated, just a little about their families, what it was like to live in different places, and what they liked in bed, but he’d felt like he could have. Like she would have been there for him and listened. And if what she’d told him was true, she was definitely the kind of person who would stick through the hard times. He’d never found that. Not even in his own family.
He shook his head, feeling foolish over wishing she turned out to be that person. The daughter part of the whole thing… His belly fluttered again.
“I don’t know,” he finally admitted. “I can’t explain it. Just a feeling I got.”
“Your gut is credible,” Josh said. “It’s not like you don’t have any experience with opportunists.”
“I’m pretty sure I should be offended by that statement.”
Josh just grinned. Then he looked at his phone. “I’m going to call Ellen, give her the story, and let you talk to her. But I know her, and her advice is sound. Don’t be surprised if she suggests that you stay cozied up to Tessa while you’re going through this.”
“That sounds like surefire trouble to me.”
“Think about what Grace said. Tessa has been in this girl’s life from day one. That’s going to weigh heavily in any court’s decision. If it were my kid and I’d already missed out on her first three years, I wouldn’t risk losing another minute. And I’d jump through hoops to prove to Tessa I was trustworthy and reliable and competent to be a good father. She’s got all the power in this situation, Zach. Your best move would be to establish a little muscle on your side in case you need it. And if I were you, I wouldn’t tell Tessa you’re consulting an attorney either.”
Zach closed his eyes and rubbed his face with a groan.
“Try to relax,” Josh said, dialing his phone. “Nothing’s going to happen until we have proof this kid is yours.”
Tessa stood out on the lanai, her phone at her ear, her heart in her throat. “Give it to me straight,” she told Sharon, a friend from law school who specialized in family law and the woman who’d drawn up the documents Tessa had taken to Zach for his signature. “What’s the worst-case scenario? I can’t lose her, right? I mean…”
She choked back the panic threatening to close her throat. She’d left Zach several voice mail messages, but he hadn’t responded. After she sent him numerous texts, he’d sent one back: I need time.
Her panic ticked higher with every hour that passed without a response. She’d convinced herself he’d consulted an attorney and was having custody documents drawn up now, right along with a custody hearing request.
She wished she’d never come to this godforsaken island. Wished she had been satisfied being Sophia’s guardian. It had been four days since she’d met him at the restaurant, and Tessa couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat, couldn’t focus.
“Your legal guardianship is ironclad,” Sharon said. “That said, he is still her biological parent. His rights as a parent aren’t automatically revoked just because he hasn’t been involved. So, yes, if he wants custody, it could get complicated. Worst-case scenario would be that he petitions the courts to revoke your guardianship, but he’d have to prove you’re not competent, and there’s nothing to support that.”
Tessa’s stomach bottomed out. She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. She might always have harbored an inkling of fear over this possibility, but she’d never truly believed it would happen. Now she was in the big fat middle of it, and the thought of losing Sophia made her feel like she was bleeding out.
“But, honestly,” Sharon said, “given what you’ve told me about him, about his career, he’d be an idiot to sue for sole custody. He couldn’t possibly believe he can care for a three-year-old little girl on his own. We also have Corinne’s letter and video with a dying declaration of who she wanted raising Sophia and why. That would go a long way with a judge.”
Jesus, she didn’t want this to go to a judge.
“There would have to be extreme extenuating circumstances to have your guardianship revoked or for Mr. Ellis to be granted full custody.”
Like hooking up with him while thinking he was someone else? Like leaving Sophia with a nanny while she was out screwing some stranger? She couldn’t bring herself to ask Sharon if that would be adequate grounds to revoke guardianship.
“Then there’s the evidence you’ve uncovered related to his callous disregard for both Corinne’s wishes and Sophia herself. Based on those facts, I can’t imagine a judge or jury taking Sophia out of your custody and putting her in his.”
“None of that is exactly comforting,” she said.
“Sweetie,” Sharon said, her tone sympathetic but edged with tough love, “you’re worrying about problems that don’t even exist.”
“Yet.”
“Yet,” Sharon agreed. “You need to focus your energy on making Mr. Ellis see that signing over his parental rights is in Sophia’s best interest. I’d advise you not to go in with a balls-of-steel attitude. It would be far less problematic if you win him over, because if you two go up against each other in court, it will take time and money to sort out the details. In the end, all three of you will be losers. I know how important she is to you. Now is the time to fight for her—with compassionate but firm gloves. Not later, not hard-core, and not in court.”
“Mommy,” Sophia said from the doorway, holding up her latest drawing. “Look what I made.” Tessa dropped into a crouch and held her free arm open. Sophia came to her and climbed into her lap. “This is Corinne.” She pointed to her raggedy clouds. “She’s in heaven. And this is us.”
On a strip of green, Sophia had drawn her typical stick figures depicting Tessa, Abby, and Sophia.
“That’s beautiful, baby.” She kissed Sophia’s head. Into the phone, she said, “Thanks, Sharon. I’ll call you when I have news.”
“You bet.”
She disconnected, set the phone aside, and pulled Sophia close. Tessa pressed her face to Sophia’s neck and tried to hold her as tight as she could without hurting her. It didn’t matter that Tessa hadn’t given birth to Sophia, she still felt physically connected to her, like their hearts were fused. The fear of losing Sophia wasn’t solely selfish. Tessa could overcome loss. But she truly wanted the very best life for Sophia. The one she’d promised Corinne she would provide even as her frien
d’s eyes had closed on her last breath.
Tears blurred Tessa’s vision. The pain of Corinne’s loss still cut deep.
“Why you crying, Mommy?” Sophia asked.
Tessa sniffled. “Happy tears, baby. I love you so much.”
“Love you too.” And in the next breath, she said, “I’m hungry. Want mac-roni and cheese?”
Tessa laughed and wiped at her tears. “I think we used the last of our mac and cheese last night. How ’bout peanut butter and jelly?”
“And apple juice?”
“Of course.”
She lifted Sophia off her lap as the condo’s front door closed.
“Who’s watching Frozen without me?” Abby’s bubbly voice drifted through the condo. “I go to the grocery, and this is what happens?”
Sophia giggled and cut a conspiratorial smile at Tessa. “Uh-oh.”
How this little creature could infuse Tessa’s heart with so much love she thought it would burst constantly mystified her.
“Sorry,” Tessa said, pushing to her feet and sharing Sophia’s grin. “It was me.”
Abby appeared at the door, hands on hips, head tilted, a dramatic look of exasperation on her pretty face. She had her hair up in a ponytail and lifted one hand to waggle her finger at Tessa. “You know better, young lady.”
Sophia burst out giggling. “It wasn’t Mommy.”
Abby feigned suspicion, wrinkles maring the perfectly smooth skin of her forehead. “It couldn’t have been you. Because you know what happens to little girls who watch Disney without their nannies…” Abby bent, hands outstretched in tickling posture, and chased Sophia around the lanai and back into the condo.
Sophia’s giggles echoed in the air and made Tessa laugh. Made her heart surge with joy.
She turned to look out at the mountains, her mind drifting back to her conversation with Sharon. How could she fight for Sophia if Zach wouldn’t cooperate?
“Hey.” Abby stood in the doorway and lowered her voice when she asked, “What did Sharon say?”
“That if he wants to be involved in her life, he could make things very difficult.”
“Did you tell her about the other night?”
Tessa returned her gaze to the lush mountains, but she didn’t even see the beauty; she was suffering too much anguish. “No,” she admitted. “I can’t help but think that sleeping with a stranger instead of spending the night home with Sophia could be considered…I don’t know…negligent or something.”
“If it was, thousands of parents would be guilty,” Abby said. “And considering his lifestyle, he’s not exactly the kind who should throw stones.”
True. But working in a male-dominated profession in a town where power was wielded mostly by men, Tessa knew firsthand how alive and well that old double standard remained. “Maybe.”
“You should do some research,” Abby suggested. “You know, find something you could threaten to expose to use as leverage.”
That had crossed her mind, but only for a millisecond. “That is exactly what I want to avoid—the nastiness, the drama, the fight.”
“That was when you thought he didn’t want her.”
Tessa had planned on approaching Zach with cool, no-nonsense, competent control. Instead, she’d slept with him within two hours of meeting him. As Abby had so boldly pointed out the day after, there was no cool, competent control when the opponent had seen your O face.
Her cell buzzed, and her heart jumped. She turned it over with hopes of seeing a number she didn’t know, raising the chances of having it be Zach. But Gordon’s name stared up at her. She exhaled and connected, shaking her head at Abby’s expectant expression. “It’s just Gordon.”
Abby frowned and turned into the condo with a roll of her eyes.
“Hey there,” she said to Gordon.
“Just Gordon?” he said, his voice playfully miffed. “Seriously? Do you know how hard I’m working at keeping shit together around here? I’m breaking my back for you over here.”
Tessa smiled. “I’m sorry, it wasn’t meant the way it sounded.”
“Hmmph. Heard that before.”
“Thanks for making me smile,” she said. “What’s up?”
“What’s not is a better question. This place is on fire lately. Bruce and Vanessa are going to break out in hives if they don’t get it on soon. Tiffany and Jennifer can’t even manage a cordial hello since Tiffany stole Steven away from Jen’s neglectful arms. Rodney’s been acting really weird. I’m more convinced than ever that he’s in the closet and that he dreams about my gorgeous body when he sleeps—”
“Gordon,” she laughed, rubbing her eyes. “TMI, buddy. I meant, what’s going on that I need to know about?”
“Oh. That.” Clearly disappointed she didn’t take an interest in the firm’s latest gossip, he got to the point. “Debra called. Veterans Affairs wants changes under Eligibility, Terms and Benefits and Fiscal Impact.”
She closed her eyes on an exhale. “Hell, that’s only half the bill. Why stop there? Don’t they want changes to the other three sections?”
“Don’t pose questions like that to the universe,” he chastised. “You’re begging for trouble, sweetheart.”
“You mean more trouble.”
“Yes, like this: Debra’s requests directly conflict with the terms Warren from Pharmaceuticals United agreed to.”
Tessa closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead. “Oh, perfect.”
“I forwarded all the emails to you and highlighted the sections where the required changes are outlined.”
She sighed, thanked Gordon, promised to kiss Sophia for him, and disconnected. Under the circumstances, she was glad for the work. It would help her mind stay busy.
Turning into the kitchen, she found Sophia helping Abby make the macaroni and cheese Abby had picked up at the store. She came up behind Sophia where she stood on a dining room chair and kissed her head. “At this rate, you’re going to be a chef by the time you’re ten.”
“A mac-roni chef,” she confirmed with perfect mispronunciation and a solid nod.
Tessa met Abby’s eyes. “I have to do a little work. Mind holding down the fort? I’d like to hit the library for a few hours.”
“Of course.”
“Thanks. I won’t be late.” She bent to kiss Tessa’s cheek. “I’ll be back soon, my mini-chef.”
Sophia returned Tessa’s kiss. Then her little hand touched Tessa’s cheek and her big blue eyes held Tessa’s with serious intent. “When I’m a mac-roni chef, you won’t have to work so hard, Mommy.”
Emotion swelled in her heart, and tears surged to her eyes. Tessa smiled and buried her face against Sophia’s soft curls. “Thanks, baby. I love you.”
“Love you,” she answered, but her attention was on the stove again. “Is it noodle time yet?”
9
Zach had downed his beer in five minutes and ordered another. His knee jittered as he looked out the window, searching for any sight of Marshall.
Josh sat across the table, messing with his phone. He turned it facedown where the wood met the wall. Then he looked at Zach and murmured, “Testing, testing.”
Retrieving the phone, he played back the recording, which was clearer than Zach would have believed possible in a crowded bar. Josh smiled. “Not quite military grade, but it will work for our purposes.”
Zach drew a breath and exhaled. He cracked his neck on both sides. Wrung his hands. Checked the time on the phone.
“Chill, dude,” Josh said. “You’re in control here. You’ve already got the evidence. You already know he did you wrong. You just need to know why and how. Believe me, his wheeler-dealer happy-go-lucky persona is going to melt at the first glimpse of the truth. He’ll be vomiting information within fifteen minutes. Set your watch. I’ll bet you on it.”
“I don’t have a watch, and you know it.”
Josh laughed with an easy nature that Zach knew could turn intense on a dime. “We’ll have this problem untangled in half
an hour, tops.”
“Untangling one, but creating more.”
“One at a time, buddy,” Josh said.
“Right.” Zach envied the man’s cool. “I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t here.”
“Enough,” he said smoothly. “You’re family. We’ll always be here for you.”
That made a smile turn Zach’s mouth. His biological family had never backed Zach, yet every member of the Renegades, none of whom were any blood relation, had been there at every turn from his very first job with them.
His gaze moved over the bar. They were sitting in a booth with a direct line of sight to the stool where Tessa had been the night he’d seen her for the first time, where she’d waited for hours, watching him while thinking he was Ian, waiting all that time for “Zach” to show. God, what a mess… A colossal clusterfuck of a mess…
“What did Ellen say about your rights?” Josh asked.
“That after we prove she’s mine through DNA, we can work out some kind of custody arrangement.”
“Man, I can’t lie. I’m envious.”
Zach focused on Josh. “You are?”
“Yeah. I really want a kid, but Grace isn’t ready. And she’s right. I know we should wait. Give ourselves time to be a couple before we dive into family, but the thought of having a little guy running around just makes me…” He shook his head. “I can’t explain it. It gives me a joy I can’t describe. I love the idea of that cementing force of my own family. Of working with Grace as a team toward something we both cherish. It’s…I don’t know, grounding or something.”
Somewhere, beneath all the turbulence inside Zach, he identified with Josh’s beliefs. Only his “family” wasn’t going to happen at all the way he’d hoped it would someday—girlfriend to wife, wife to family, raising children together, growing old together. No, Zach was going about it all ass-backwards. Now he was suddenly looking at being a single, part-time father with an impossible schedule.
“She also agreed with you on staying close to Tessa,” Zach said, squirming in his seat at the uncomfortable thought. “But I don’t like the idea of manipulating her.”