Limelight (Hollywood Stardust)

by Kim Carmichael

  Beaker barked and ran to his side.

  Rather than fight or comply, Ryder smiled. The bastard smiled.

  Drew pulled back his fist. The urge to ruin Ryder’s perfect Hollywood smile overwhelmed him. “I told you to get out of my house.”

  “She didn’t come running to me last night. I haven’t even seen her. I received a message from your best friend asking me to pick up some things for her since he doesn’t want her wearing Ivy’s clothes, and in the process, I’m now privy to all that happened.” Ryder pushed him aside and reached over to the table, picking up Erin’s panties. “I assume she showed up to Wilson’s with not much.”

  Drew loosened his grip a little. She went to Logan, not Ryder. However, not too long ago, Logan was here and Drew played the part of support system. How did he end up with Ryder? The man wasn’t even second best, he was beyond the bottom of the barrel, he was under the barrel. “Put those down.”

  “She never wore anything this racy with me.” With a tilt of his head, Ryder dropped the drawers and lifted the camera. “I take it this was the weapon of choice?”

  Drew ground his teeth together.

  Ryder looked up at him. “Listen, I know I’m not Logan swooping in with my cape and making everything better. But he’s tied up with someone much more high maintenance than you are, so why don’t you let go of me, sit down and take a sip of your alcohol like a good boy.”

  At last, Drew let go of his once co-star, sat down on the side chair, and swiped his glass off the table. For a finale, he chugged down the drink, nearly choking as the burning liquid slithered down to his empty stomach.

  “And cheers to you as well.” Ryder poured Drew some more, then lifted his own glass, took a sip, and fiddled with the camera.

  The best course of action was probably to get drunk, and Drew chugged the glass down, right as his and Erin’s moans filled the room. He dropped the glass and lunged for the camera, inhaling to get out a warning, but an errant droplet of booze got stuck in his throat, choking him and he broke out into coughs.

  With a huge grin, Ryder held the camera out of his reach. “Nice move, I didn’t know you had it in you.”

  Drew managed to clear his throat and take a deep breath. “Give that to me.”

  “Hold on, I just want to see how it ends.” Ryder glanced over at him. “I have a feeling.” He switched the camera off and put it back on the table. “I have to say the movie I’m making is not as predicable.”

  If nothing else, now Drew could put a nice helping of mortification on top of his self-loathing sundae. Of anyone who could have revealed the video, he never thought it would be him. This is how these things went viral. He returned to his seat and put his head in his hand. What the hell happened to his life?

  “Do you love her?” Ryder patted his leg.

  Beaker trotted over to the man who gave him the treat. Traitor.

  “What kind of question is that? I’ve always loved her.” He watched as Ryder scratched his dog behind the ear. Erin loved Beaker, Beaker loved her, and in fact he kept looking for her. There was a huge hole Drew somehow fell into with no way out.

  “Normally, a man who loves a woman doesn’t leave them for twenty years, seems like that man would do anything to stay with her.” Ryder gave him a glance and then returned his attention to Beaker.

  “You don’t know anything about what happened.” Not only did he not owe this man an explanation, but as a person who collected women for sport, Ryder wouldn’t understand.

  “Yeah, I do.” Ryder gave Beaker another pat and leaned forward. “Remember, while you went off for twenty years, I stuck around. Do you think in all those years and all the crying and all the what ifs she didn’t confide in me in what happened?”

  An overwhelming heat took over his body. Now Erin was telling personal business?

  “Dude, she never thought she would see you again, but she always held the torch. Don’t blame her for needing a confidante.” Ryder narrowed his eyes. “I know she put you off, I know she said she would be with you, and I know she chickened out at the last minute and said some truly terrible things.”

  He sat back and stared off into the yard at the lemon tree he planted for Erin even when she wasn’t part of his life.

  “You got her back and then some. I think the universe is even. I think you needed the time apart because you weren’t ready for each other.”

  Ryder’s words echoed around him, but if the man was going to pass judgment, then he needed to know the whole thing. “She filmed us for a reality show without telling me.”

  “Right.” Ryder nodded. “Because she was afraid of this.”

  “Don’t you understand? She violated everything we built.” Drew focused on the man he saw as his rival since the day he met him.

  “Right because she was afraid of this.”

  “I thought she wanted to be with me, but all she did was use me to get her footage.” It was a mistake to even tell him. “She lied, again.”

  “First. She never lied, she backed out on you. Maybe she’s not the most truthful person, but she didn’t lie. What she did is withhold the truth, and can you blame her?” Ryder shrugged. “I’m not saying what she did was right, and I’d be pissed too, but flip it and see her side. You know, when anyone faces fear, the best thing to do is ask—what is the worst that can happen, but no one expects it to happen? Well, in Erin’s world, this was the worst, and then it happened.”

  He stared at Ryder. This was the most they ever spoke unless it was scripted. “I didn’t come back to be put on display.”

  “Who’s the liar now?” Once more, Ryder stretched out and put his hands behind his head. “Dude, you came back in a really public way, you took a part in the sequel to the only movie you made, and you set your sights on a woman who is very visible. You crave the limelight just like anyone else, only you’re too much of a pussy to admit it.”

  Yes, he wanted his life back, but he wanted it on his own terms. Drew balled his hand in a fist. If he was part of a couple, it couldn’t be only on his terms.

  After an over exaggerated stretch, Ryder stood. “I’m going to collect a few of Erin’s things, only enough to fill this bag.” He lifted the paper bag. “The rest the two of you will have to work out.”

  “End of the week we’re having a media event at the Hollywood Stardust façade.” Ryder laid that on him and headed toward the stairs. “I suppose I better give you a warning since you’re so camera shy, though it didn’t look so from all those social media updates on your trip.”

  No one would go through Erin’s things without him, especially Ryder. He stood as well and the room spun. Port, scotch and the realization he was going to help collect her items made him light headed. Was this his acceptance of the end?

  Ryder stopped just short of the first stair and turned back to him. “I ask you again, why do you love her?”

  He stared at Ryder. How did he tell him? There were so many reasons. Maybe not enough or maybe too many.

  “You both have a lot of pain. I think before you do anything else you better be able to pinpoint it, or you don’t belong with her.” Ryder bounded up the stairs.

  Damn everything. Maybe his sworn enemy was right, or maybe the guy was only here to mess with him. If there was any truth in his life, it was that Ryder Scott only cared about Ryder Scott. Still, Drew needed to figure it out, or he needed to leave her again.

  * * * *

  “‘ROXY LOOKS BETWEEN the three of them and puts her nail in her mouth.’” Her heart racing, Erin turned to the last page of the Hollywood Starburst script and hugged the script before continuing. At long last, she would know who her alter ego ended up with.

  In truth, this was her moment, it didn’t belong to some other actress who didn’t do the first movie, but with no choice, she spent the last two days up in the living quarters above Wilson’s bar reading to herself and acting out all the parts.

  Tears clouded her eyes. The Starburst script held the same magic as Stardust
, the same raw realness, the same situation that made her already battered and bruised heart ache.

  “I can do this.” Erin went to the mirror and nodded to her reflection. Well, she couldn’t do anything else, so she may as well read the last line.

  At last, she gazed down at the page.

  “What?” Her breath caught. She had to have read it wrong. “Wait.” After taking a long breath, she read the line again. “Logan!” Clutching the script in a death grip, she collided with the door. She swung the door open as if she were the heroine in that natural disaster movie she once did, she went careening down the stairs into the kitchen. “Logan!”

  “She read the end.” At the sight of her, Ivy put her hand over her mouth.

  Spoon in hand, Logan turned away from the stove. “But she’s out of bed and dressed.”

  Erin set her sights on her prey and charged, hitting Logan with the script. “How could you do this?” She hit him again. “Are Roxy and I destined to be tortured for eternity?” At her own words, she burst into tears, spun around, and flung herself into her best friend’s arms.

  Ivy patted her. “I warned you that you may not want to read the script at this moment in your life.”

  Erin caught her breath and pulled back, holding Ivy at arms’ length. “Ivy, as my best friend and an expert in this particular film, I demand that you fix this travesty.”

  “Well, the script was written this way. Logan and I discussed it with the studio, and we really feel doing it any other way would not do the story justice.” Ivy widened her eyes.

  “What happened to the Hollywood ending?” Roxy had to have a Hollywood ending, because one of them had to have it.

  “It’s not that kind of story.” Ivy pulled her in for another hug. “It’s a poignant film.”

  “I made you your yogurt.” Logan tried plying her with breakfast.

  “It will probably win a ton of awards, but the public will hate it.” Her head hung low, she let go of Ivy and dragged herself to the stainless steel table in the middle of the kitchen.

  “It’s going to be okay.” Ivy’s tone was one of a big sister.

  Erin slapped the script down and opened it up to the last page. “‘I’m going to take all my memories with me and see what happens. Roxy smiles and turns. Fade to black.’” The tears restarted, and she hugged the script to her chest. “This is why I couldn’t play Roxy.”

  Logan came over, dropped a bowl in front of her, and with an oversized spoon, plopped some yogurt in the dish. “Bon appetite.”

  Ivy sat across from her. “What makes you say that?”

  “If Roxy were my age, she could make a decision. If Roxy were my age, she would know what she wanted.” She shook her head. “I know what I want.” Even if she couldn’t have him, she knew what she wanted, actually who she wanted.

  “Do you?” Logan put a plate of pancakes in front of Ivy and sat down with one of his own. Somehow, the two of them found the true “it” factor, the one where they could eat and create and be together.

  Only last week, she was in this position with Drew. She made an omelet and they sat together with Beaker and talked about their line of products.

  Beaker. She couldn’t even go there.

  “Do I what?” She stared at the pancakes, and her mouth watered. Logan’s pancakes were famous, well at least in her circle, even Ryder would eat them.

  “Lord, help me.” Logan stood and made another plate and set it down in front of her. “Do you know what you want?”

  She looked around her place setting, lifted her napkin and her plate, and then put her head in her hand.

  “Erin?” Ivy reached over to her.

  “I want my supplements.” For the millionth time since she walked out of the lab, her eyes heated. What would happen to Hollywood Glow now?

  “Anything else?” Logan strummed his fingers on the table.

  “I don’t want to always worry about the next role. I want to make pot roast and products, and I don’t want to feel like I have to add more controversy to something if I don’t want to, and if I accept a part, I don’t want it to feel like the last line of Hollywood Starburst.” She wanted everything she couldn’t have. Through all the tears came a moment of clarity and once more she stood. “I don’t want to do this reality show. I have to get out of it.” No matter her money situation, she wouldn’t take a job out of desperation.

  “Are you going to let me help?” Logan hit the table.

  The job of her helpmate didn’t belong to Logan. It belonged to someone else, but since he didn’t want the job, it belonged to her. “No. It’s not your responsibility. Never was.” Along with everything else, she wanted or didn’t want, she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt, she didn’t want Rick Southern as an agent. “I’m going to go talk to Brian.” With no phone and some groveling to do, she would just go to his office and wait like every other actor. It was better to be a star who faded gracefully than one who turned into a black hole. She sort of forgot that along the way.

  Finally with a purpose other than self-doubt and mourning what could have been with the man she loved, she shoved down a pancake and darted back up the stairs. Rather than focusing on looking picture perfect, she collected her items, threw on a pair of sunglasses, and ran back down. After she made a quick pit stop to put another pancake in her mouth, she waved at Logan and Ivy and opened the back door to Brian.

  “Ah!” She jumped back, dropped her bag, and put her hand to her chest. “What are you doing here?” Without a doubt, she was going to have a heart attack, or some sort of cardiac event.

  “I helped anyway.” Logan patted her on the back. “Ivy and I have some things to do for the media event. Take as much time as you need.”

  Originally, she was going to have a drive to think about what to say to him, but with that option taken off the table, she was forced to improvise. She picked up her bag and straightened up. In a suit and tie and with his sunglasses on, the man could have been a movie star himself, only he always said he couldn’t act his way out of a designer bag. “I was just on my way to see you.”

  “You look different.” He touched her shoulder and made his way inside.

  “As you said, I let myself go.” She shut the door and returned to the table.

  “Actually, I meant you looked beautiful.” He took the seat across from her.

  They stared at one another.

  Brian, being Brian, finally spoke. “Logan told me what happened.”

  “Well, I think we both know I had to go with my heart, or I would have always wondered and always held the torch.” Life would have been easier if she could have loved Brian the way he deserved.

  “Why do you think I made you go? You didn’t need me complicating your life, besides I kept you as long as I could.” He shrugged.

  “It was time.” She reached her hand across the table. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”

  “For what it’s worth, so am I.” He took her hand and squeezed. “Now will you let me reprise my role and let me see what horror show you got yourself into?”

  “It’s a reality show.” Exhaling, she handed him her entire bag.

  “What is the one thing I always taught you about this business?” After taking a moment to peek around in her purse, he excavated the contract.

  “I don’t know just one, you taught me everything.” She poked her fork into the remaining pancake on her plate. “Never take a part because there’s nothing else out there.”

  With raised eyebrows, he glanced over at her.

  “I don’t have any money.” Lest even a fly heard, she whispered.

  “You don’t check your bank accounts, Miss Holland.” He got a pair of reading glasses out of his suit jacket and began reading the contract.

  Her bank accounts? “What do you mean? You gave me my check register.”

  “Love, you are nothing if not predicable. Go online. You have several savings accounts and investment accounts. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want you sho
pping when upset.” He furrowed his brow and turned the page.

  She had money? Really? “Why did you say anything now? I’m still not happy!”

  “But look what you did.” He thumbed through the last couple of pages and put the contract down. “You went out there, you got a job, and you could have survived if you needed to. I’m really quite impressed, even if you went with an agent you have no business being with.”

  “I was scared.”

  “I’m just surprised he didn’t sign you on the spot. What a fool.” Brian pulled his cell phone out of his pocket.

  Truth be told, she thought the same thing. “Can you fix it?”

  “No, but you can.” He pushed the contract back at her, pointed to one of the paragraphs and gave her his phone.

  “I can’t fix anything.”

  “That’s because you don’t know what you want.” He countered.

  What she wanted seemed to be the theme of the morning. She and Roxy were one and the same, neither of them knew what they wanted, but damn if she wasn’t determined to figure it out.

  “What do you want? You’re a woman who fights for what you want, you proved it right here.” Brian tapped the contract. “Tell me what you want.”

  “I don’t want to go through my life scared someone will disappear.” Unable to look him in the eye, she read the paragraph he pointed out on the contract.

  “He didn’t disappear this time.” Brian lowered his voice.

  Her chest took on that familiar ache. “But he didn’t run after me either.”

  “Maybe he’s waiting to find out if you know what you want.”

  “I only know I don’t want to be worried all the time, and I don’t want any stupid poignant ending.” She dialed the phone.

  HOLLYWOOD STARBURST

  EXT. INDIANAPOLIS, IN – SCHOOL FIELD – DAY.

  Rehearsal for graduation just ended.

  ROXY picks up her bags and looks out at the bleachers.

  CHARLES comes up behind her.

  CHARLES

  Hey, how’s it going?

  ROXY gives Charles a hug. She lets go when William and Steven join them.