by Rachel Lee
It was the surprise that tossed him back on shore to safety. This shouldn’t have happened. No way. Nor did he need to review his sensible reasons once again.
He loosened his hold on her, slowly so she wouldn’t feel rejected, but as he backed away, he couldn’t mistake the brief flicker of hurt in her green eyes.
Well, damn him all to hell for a fool. All he was trying was to keep either of them from being hurt, and he’d gone and hurt her anyway.
He didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t exactly explain that a momentary madness had overtaken him. Couldn’t possibly tell her he didn’t trust her to stay in this town and he wasn’t traveling that painful path again. Couldn’t say, “Gee that was nice, how’s the weather?”
If he’d ever had any finesse, he’d just blown it.
But then she rescued him. A smile, a bit uncertain, a clearing of her gaze, a toss of her beautiful hair. “Wow,” she said. “But I only just met you.”
The line was so obviously intended to lighten the moment of near-disaster that he felt a load lift. “True,” he agreed.
She walked back to the table and settled as if she intended to eat. “Don’t worry about it,” she said calmly. “A kiss is just a kiss and I have no expectations.”
That, he thought, as he returned to finish the cooling dinner with her, sounded as if it went beyond a dismissal to a deeper emotional truth for her.
She had no expectations? What did she mean by that?
Then he reminded himself it was better if he never found out.
Chapter 5
Cassie awoke in the morning feeling half-dead. It hadn’t helped that she’d lain awake half the night bouncing between remembering an incredible kiss and worrying that people were talking about her and that they suspected she had lied about a student.
The worst of it was she couldn’t tell which upset her more. Along about two in the morning, she decided it was the kiss. Bad enough to know the man didn’t really want to get close, but now she knew indelibly just how his hard body felt against hers, which only fed the fire of desire he awoke in her with such ease. Darn, it had been like opening Pandora’s box.
Come morning, she sat bleary-eyed over her coffee, not at all eager to get to school. She tried to sort through an emotional tangle that seemed to be knotting ever tighter. She wanted Linc, admittedly. He didn’t want her. The kiss had astonished her, coming after all the distance he had tried to dig between them like a canyon gorge, but it wasn’t the first time someone had been attracted to her and then dropped her like a hot potato.
Story of her life, she thought dismally. Somehow she attracted men, and then she turned them off. She didn’t know how or why, but they never stayed long. It seemed they found her initially sexy, and then their interest stopped. Boom.
So it shouldn’t surprise her Linc had reacted like every other guy who had made an advance. In some way she couldn’t discern, and that none of her friends had ever been able to explain, she put men off after the initial attraction.
She ought to be used to that fact by now.
Then there was this mess at school. Sighing, she stared into her coffee and decided to add some milk to it. Her stomach felt uneasy and the coffee was giving her heartburn. She knew better than to try to go without it, though. Coffee had for years been the thing that stood between her and some very bad headaches. A doctor had even recommended it when she didn’t want to take something stronger.
So she swallowed her coffee reluctantly with some dry rye toast and pondered how everything could look so different in such a short space of time. At her age that should come as no shock, but it was still surprising.
A week ago she’d been practically buzzing with happiness about teaching and living here. Now she was dreading the day ahead. She had been confronted by a parent, had seen disapproval from people she didn’t even know, and now she wondered what she was going to run into in the classroom today. How many of her students would take a cue from a parent or friend?
Well, there was only one way to find out. Rising, she rinsed her dishes, grabbed her book bag and a jacket and set out.
Conard County offered her another absolutely gorgeous day, although it had grown considerably chillier than a week ago. Ordinarily the air would have invigorated her, but this morning her feet felt like lead.
Lack of sleep, she told herself, only half believing it. Then a thought occurred to her and she quickened her step. It was time to find out exactly what Les had told those parents. If he had told parents she had been shoved, she wanted him to take care of it. If he hadn’t, then she would know the problem stemmed from elsewhere. How that would help, she wasn’t certain, but she didn’t want to also wonder about Les.
She knew Gus, the janitor, would be waiting for her outside her classroom. He was there every morning now, a kind of sentinel, and he always checked out the room before she entered. Unlike some around here, he didn’t seem to suffer from an overwhelming belief in the goodness of everyone.
That was a cynical thought, and she yanked herself sharply away from it. One person. A small handful. No more than that. If people had heard a lie about her, then their disapproval wasn’t a bad thing. They were rallying around neighbors. That was good, right? Eventually, after this mess was over and enough time had passed, she hoped to be one of the neighbors folks around her would want to protect.
Linc wasn’t outside. Evidently he’d completed his turn at bus duty and an English teacher, Carl Malone, had taken over. He greeted her pleasantly. Whatever was going around on the grapevine, it hadn’t affected him yet.
For the first time she wondered how many of the teachers might start turning frosty, even though the situation had been explained at the meeting this past Monday.
She was not in the best of moods by the time she reached the principal’s office and her mood didn’t improve when she saw Linc already inside with Les.
Memories of the kiss came rushing back, and with it an unwanted warm weakness between her legs. Damn, she hated that he could make her want him so much when he clearly didn’t reciprocate the feeling. He saw her through the glass, though, and waved her in.
She trudged around the large reception desk and entered Les’s office.
“I guess you had the same idea I did,” he said. “I was just asking Les exactly what he told those parents.”
Les, seated behind his desk, looked both annoyed and defensive. “I didn’t tell anyone that those students shoved Cassie,” he snapped. “I don’t know where that’s coming from.”
“What exactly did you tell them?” Cassie demanded.
“That you had told them to report to my office for a legitimate reason and they refused. Not one word more than that, except to say we couldn’t allow students to defy a teacher’s legitimate authority.”
“You’re sure?” Linc asked.
“I’m not an idiot. Details aren’t necessary for the very reason you’re in here complaining about.”
Cassie looked between the two men. “Then what started it?”
“Probably one of the students involved, or one of their friends,” Les said. “A lie, pure and simple, exaggerating the matter.”
“I still think,” Linc said firmly, “that you should have told everything to the parents, including the bullying.”
“I was trying to protect James Carney from retaliation!”
“So now a good teacher’s reputation is being impugned. You need to call those parents back and tell them what Cassie saw.”
“No,” said Cassie, surprising herself. “No. It’s over as far as those students are concerned. They had detention and the case is closed. Telling the parents about the bullying will only make them madder, and I’ll probably be accused of lying about that. Leave James out of it.”
Linc faced her. “Are you sure? This thing has been handled poorly, if you ask me. We need to address all the issues involved with all the students involved.”
“Of course,” Cassie agreed. “But arguing with people over t
heir current presumption isn’t going to help.” She shook her head a little. “I admit I wanted to know exactly what Les had told the parents, but obviously he didn’t say anything to start this kind of extreme talk. So it had to be a student or parent exaggerating the matter, claiming I lied about what happened. No one can prevent that.”
“I prefer to take most bulls directly by the horns,” Linc admitted. “But you’re right. We can’t call back the lies. At this point all we can probably do is avoid inflaming things until we get our presentation ready and get the new policy moving.”
“We have a policy?” Les said, bridling.
“We’re going to try to get students involved,” Linc said. “To get some of the most popular students to start frowning on bullying of any sort.”
“Oh.” Les stroked his chin. “I wonder if that will work.”
“It has in other schools,” Cassie said. “Unfortunately, it usually starts earlier than high school. It takes time to grow a culture.”
“Well, I don’t like the one that seems to have sprung up here at all. I’m going to take whatever action I deem necessary. You guys have a few weeks. If we have another incident of any kind, I’m cracking down.”
Outside in the hallway, Cassie started for her classroom, knowing that Gus was probably still standing there like a palace guard.
“So he’s going to crack down,” Linc remarked. “I don’t know how much that’ll help.”
“I guess it depends on how many get rebellious.”
“At this age, that’ll probably be quite a few. Cassie...”
She looked at him then and sensed where he was trying to go. “Forget about it, Linc. Things happen. I need to get to my room.”
Hard words to say, but the best way to handle it. She left him quickly, striding away as fast as she could walk. Trouble. There’d be nothing but trouble if she got in any deeper with that man. Regardless of whether his reluctance grew from something in him or something about her, or a combination of both, it didn’t matter. It boded badly, and it was time to stay away.
“All clear,” Gus said cheerfully when she appeared. He opened the door and waved her in.
“Thanks so much, Gus. I really appreciate your concern.”
“No problem. I see more than a lot of people would like. What you’re doing is right.”
Well, at least she had her own cheerleading section. The thought brought the first smile of the day to her face.
Nor was the day bad. While she had expected there might be some trouble with her students, they all seemed to behave perfectly normally. James Carney still looked isolated and a bit pinched in the far back corner, but that wasn’t a change. She just hoped that someday soon he would start to appear more comfortable.
For now all she could do was avoid drawing any attention to him that might bring on more teasing.
Unpleasant though it was for people to be talking about her and thinking she might have lied, it was far better for the attention to be on her. She could handle it. Well, except for butchered rats. The memory nearly made her shudder, but then she reminded herself nothing else had happened. The mood must be cooling down now, at least with whoever had killed the rat and phoned her. The confrontation in the parking lot was still fresh in her mind, but she could deal with that kind of thing.
It was shadowy threats from unknown persons that bothered her most of all, and those had stopped.
By the end of the day she was feeling considerably more cheerful about life...well, except when it came to Linc. The memory of his kiss plagued her, popping up without warning, and unwanted.
Damn, she thought, it was just a kiss. Maybe the nicest kiss of her life, the most arousing—how in the world could she explain that?—but it was still just a kiss. He hadn’t taken it one step further. Meaningless. Utterly meaningless.
Except she had felt his response to her, and the memory of that kept drizzling through her body like warm honey. He had wanted her, if only physically. Supposedly that didn’t mean much with men, but it meant a lot to her. It was good for her ego, if not her peace of mind.
At the end of the day, Linc appeared in the doorway of her classroom just as she was tucking the last items in her book bag.
“Let’s go get a bite,” he said.
She looked at him uncertainly. “Why?”
“Why not?” He shrugged one shoulder, reminding her abruptly of the strength in the arms that had held her last night. “We go out to Maude’s. Everyone can see you with me. That may lead some folks to question certain assumptions about you.”
Another rescue mission. God, she thought as she picked up her bag and tossed it over her shoulder, she wished he’d turn up sometime for another reason. Of course there was that crazy trip out to his ranch on Monday night. What purpose had that served?
Only to make her wish she could spend more time there. She’d really enjoyed it. On the other hand, how could either of them be sure she might like it when the novelty wore off? Maybe that was part of what made him keep a distance.
Deciding there was no point in arguing about it, and silently admitting she did want to spend more time with him, she accompanied him out to his truck. There must be neutral things they could talk about, like his ranch and his livestock. Anything but school and bullying. Or desire.
He remained silent through the short drive over to Maude’s café. One of the things she found charming in this town was that the City Diner, clearly signed and marked as such, was called Maude’s by everyone, after its owner. It had struck her as a signpost indicating how well the people around here knew each other. Learning that had been one of the things that had helped her make her decision to accept this job.
She hadn’t really thought about being an outsider, and after Maude had taken their orders in her grumpy fashion, she said so to Linc.
“The one thing I didn’t take into my calculations when I fell in love with this county...”
He arched his brows, his blue eyes intent. “You fell in love with this county?”
“Of course I did. I wouldn’t have moved here otherwise.”
“But how could you know so fast?”
She hesitated, then finally decided to admit the truth. “Somewhere inside I’ve always looked for a place like this. A small town surrounded by wide-open spaces where most folks are friendly. A place where I could actually get to know most of my neighbors. Silly dream, I suppose, but I dreamed it anyway. Until now I’ve never lived in a place like this, but I always, always wanted to.”
He nodded. “Sorry for the interruption. You were saying?”
“There was one thing I didn’t realize, that I’d be an outsider. Maybe for a long time to come. I never had to face that before. So...” She shrugged. “I’ve learned something. Kids whose families came here to work at the semiconductor plant are still outsiders, from what you said last week. How long have they been here, but they’re still the new kids?”
He frowned faintly and leaned back to let Maude serve them coffee. “It’s easier with the adults, I think.”
“Are you sure?”
At that a faint smile appeared on his face. “Well, when you see what Maude puts in front of you next, you may get the message.”
“I didn’t order anything.”
“Around here, that doesn’t matter.”
Barely had the words left his mouth than Maude slapped two pieces of pie in front of them and stomped off without a word. “Pie? Why? What do you mean?”
“Whatever Maude has heard, she’s letting you know she doesn’t agree with it. You’ve just been welcomed as a regular here. And that means that sometimes Maude decides what you eat.”
“Wow.” She looked at the pie and felt warmed. “I’m honored.”
“You should be. Some folks have been coming in here for years and never been given free pie.”
She looked at him and a little giggle escaped her. “So all is better now?”
“Here at least. Maude’s making her opinion known, and my experienc
e is that if she hears any talk about you, some steaks are going to get overdone.”
Cassie laughed outright at that. “But why would she have a different opinion from everyone else?”
“I doubt it’s everyone else, to begin with. Yes, some folks are talking. It worries me, and I wanted you to be aware of it, but rarely does everyone around here buy something like that as gospel. Who was it who confronted you, anyway?”
“I don’t know.” And she hadn’t wanted to talk about this. “I never met her. Can we discuss something else, please?”
“Sure.” He sounded agreeable. “So what’s on your mind?”
A lot of things were on her mind, and not a single thing she could mention, really. Ask him about that kiss last night and why he’d pulled away? Not likely. She hunted around inside her head for an innocuous topic while covering her silence with a mouthful of pie.
“Wow,” she said. “This pie is fantastic!”
“Maude’s famous for them. One of the reasons it means something when she gives you a slice for free.”
Cassie looked around and saw Maude walking toward a table. “This pie is fabulous!” she called. “Thank you!”
She supposed that grimace was a kind of smile.
“Not the easiest person to get along with?” she asked Linc quietly.
“Depends. I wouldn’t want to be on her bad side, though.”
She savored another bite of pie, knowing she’d never enjoy it if they came back to the bullying. “Do you ever think about getting more animals at your ranch?”
He smiled. “Often. I like them. But I have to be realistic about what I can handle. As it is, breeding alone gets ahead of me sometimes.”
“Like rabbits, huh?”
“Not quite, but sometimes it feels like it.” He rolled his eyes humorously.
“I never thought about raising goats. I can understand all the uses for sheep, but goats?”