by BILL KITSON
Pillock: fool
Pips: police insignia indicating rank
Piss off: as exclamation, go away (rude). Also can mean annoy.
Pissing down: raining
Playing field: sports field
Pleb: ordinary person (often insulting)
Portakabin: portable building used as temporary office etc.
Post: mail
Planning Department: the local authority department which issues licences to build and develop property
PNC: police national computer
PSNI: police service of Northern Ireland
Prat: silly idiot
Premier League: top English soccer division
Proms: concerts held at the Albert Hall
Public Analyst: scientists who perform chemical analysis for public protection purposes
RAF: Royal Air Force
Rag: newspaper
Ram-raiding: robbery where a vehicle is rammed through a shop window
Randy: horny
Recce: reconnaissance
Red Adair: famous oil well firefighter
Resus: resuscitation room
Right state: messy
Ring: telephone (verb)
Roadworks: repairs done to roads
Rozzers: police
RSPB: Royal Society for the Protection of Birds
RTC: road traffic collision
RV: rendezvous point
Royal Engineers: British army corps dealing with military engineering etc.
Rugger: rugby (posh American football)
Sarge: sergeant
SCO19: Specialist Crime and Operations Specialist Firearms Command
Scrote: low life
Section: to have someone committed to a mental hospital under UK mental health laws
Semi: Semi-detached house, house with another house joined to it on one side only
Shedload: a large amount
Shop: store
Shout the odds: talk in a loud bossy way
Sickie: day off work pretending to be ill
Sixth-form college: school for high school students in final two years.
SIO: senior investigating officer
Skell: tramp or homeless person
Skip: a large open container used for building waste
Slapper: slag
Smackhead: heroin addict
Snout: police informer
SOCO: scene-of-crime officer
Sod: an annoying person
Sort: to do or make
Solicitor: lawyer
Sparky: electrician
Spook: spy
Spuds: potatoes
Squaddie: a soldier of low rank
Stunner: beautiful woman
Super: superintendent (police rank)
Surveyor: someone who examines land and buildings professionally
Sweeting: endearment, like sweetheart
Tabloid: newspaper
Tea: Dinner (Northern English)
Tea towel: drying cloth
Till: cash register
Tip: a mess
Tipsy: a bit drunk
Top himself: commit suicide
Torch: flashlight
Tutor: university teacher
Tower block: tall building containing apartments (usually social housing)
Twoc: steal a car, often just for joyriding
Upmarket: affluent or fancy
Wacky baccy: cannabis
Wally: silly person
War Cry: Salvation Army magazine
Wash: the washing machine
Water board: company supplying water to an area
White van man: typical working-class man who drives a small truck
WI: Women’s Institute, organisation of women in UK for social/cultural activity
Widow’s weeds: black clothes worn by a widow in mourning
Wilco: will comply i.e. yes
Wrinklies: old people
Yellowbelly: native of Lincolnshire
Yob: a rude or aggressive youth or person
Yorkie bar: type of chocolate bar