by Jade Powers
When he finished with the boxes, he called for transport. It was too bad that Sven had already left Spokane. He would have trusted Sven with the destruction. He would have to supervise himself. His throat constricted a little when they built the bonfire and poured the gasoline. They were on company property miles outside of Spokane, a lonely space in the middle of nowhere.
No one would ever suspect that the top secret files he stole would end here. He personally smashed the three mind control ‘suits’. They were the implants tied to the nervous system. He smashed the sphere his own company had designed and then lit it all. Hundreds of thousands of dollars burned to ashes.
Drake stared at the black smoke feeling bemused and annoyed. So that was what having a conscience felt like. All that money going up in flames. It would be enough to put his name at the top of a hit list...if they ever found out that he had burned it all. He watched until the boxes were blackened bits. He would wait until he reached Sun Valley to sort through the computer files.
Sun Valley was a small town nestled among hills with scraggly pines, best known for the Hollywood couples who called it home. The air strip afforded Drake a quick entrance and exit as needed.
The plane was nearly empty. Accompanying him, Drake had the pilot and another employee from Spokane who also lived in Sun Valley. He spent the trip staring out the window. It wasn’t a long flight, equivalent almost to a car trip when comparing the amount of time traveled. Hannah was waiting for him. Her body had expanded. He smiled when she rubbed her stomach without thinking about it.
“I’m glad you’re home safe,” When he wrapped his arms around Hannah and she pressed close to him, he loved that he was hugging his little daughter, too. He kissed Hannah gently.
“Sven and Minka are here. Sven wanted to invite us personally to the wedding,” Hannah’s smile couldn’t hide the deep circles under her eyes or the lines of pain in her forehead and around her mouth.
“I still can’t believe we both found our loves at the same time. You look tired. Shall we head home, and I’ll tuck you in for a nap? I’ll need to come back and unload everything.” Drake said.
Hannah said, “Drake, I don’t think a nap will help. The cancer is back. I don’t have long. I’m trying to hold on for Noel, but I just want to spend time with you. Is it okay if I wait around while you get the plane situated?”
Drake felt like someone had dumped a pile of coal into his stomach. He said, “Honey, don’t talk like that. Have you spoken with Marie?”
“I told her the pain is back. She said we would take it one day at a time and not to lose hope.”
“I’m looking for a cure. Please don’t give up,” Drake wrapped his arms around Hannah again. If only he could take this from her, take the pain, take the cancer, take all the bad and leave the good.
Hannah rested her head on his shoulder. She said, “I’m not giving up. I just want you to know. Sometimes I feel like I’m living a completely new life, and I’m not sure how I got so lucky. Even if this doesn’t turn out the way we want, it’s been the best year of my life. I’m glad I met you.”
Drake lifted his head and stared at the sky. He wasn’t a man who cried. The tears were lodged in his heart. They existed, but he didn’t allow them a place in his eyes. It was all that staring at the sun that made them water. He said, “I love you, Hannah.”
She murmured, “I love you, too.”
“It shouldn’t take long to unload. Do you want to wait inside?”
Hannah fell asleep on the bed where they first made love. It took all of five minutes for her to doze off while he walked down the stairs with luggage in his hands and a backpack over his shoulder. He returned for the computers in the storage bins. When every computer was stashed away in the car, either in the trunk of the backseat, he returned to the cabin. Hannah was still curled up on the bed. She had worn a cotton dress and sandals, which probably was better for napping than jeans. Drake pulled the curtain around, an unnecessary privacy since the rest of the crew had gone a half hour before.
Taking off his shoes and pants, Drake slid in behind Hannah. His arm didn’t fit the same as it had that first night. As he curled around Hannah his emotions went deeper than lust; he felt more than attraction. Somewhere along the way, he had fallen in love.
Drake quietly rested with Hannah until she woke up. He had missed this closeness, the quiet togetherness of having her in his arms. When she opened her eyes, he said, “Ready to go home?”
Hannah snuggled closer and said, “I think I am.”
Hannah hurt. The pain started in her back and radiated to her shoulders. She stretched, trying to get comfortable. Four more months. Somehow she had to make it. So far she had done everything she could think of to save herself and the baby. She cut out sugar a few months back, still dreaming from time to time of doughnuts or cake, so strong was her addiction.
They returned to the house. Just that short trip wiped Hannah out. She climbed into bed. While Drake spent hours at his office a short walk away unplugging computers and searching files, Hannah curled up under the covers crying softly from the pain. She knew he would be hours. She whispered to the baby, “He’s doing it for us. I know he thinks he’ll find something, but I just wish he were here.”
The baby kicked in agreement. “Noel, you have to survive this, okay? No matter what happens to me, your Daddy wants you so much,” Hannah said. She rolled over, trying to get comfortable. She had no idea pain could be that strong and unstoppable. In the past, she’d done things that hurt, but could ignore it. Cuts and abrasions mostly, the kinds of things that people get and can shove to the back of their mind. The pain she felt now couldn’t be moved, nor even nudged.
“We’ll get through this. We will.” Hannah closed her eyes. When sleep didn’t come, she edged her way to the side of the bed. With a sigh, she hoisted herself up. “No one ever said this would be easy. Your Daddy’s going to be so great, though. He already showed me a picture of the tree where we will hang a swing. He has to build the house first.”
Hannah pulled on her shoes. It was a short walk to Drake’s office from the house they shared. Every step felt like a mile. When Hannah started walking, she didn’t think much of it. She’d walked twice that distance on campus last year every day for Calculus. By the time she reached the steps to the brick building where Drake worked, Hannah could barely lift her legs. She held onto the railing, pain shooting up her back.
When she realized the pain wasn’t going to slow down and that standing at the bottom step wasn’t really resting, Hannah grasped the railing and pulled herself up, one slow stair at a time. Limping down the hallway, Hannah ducked into the woman’s bathroom. She looked a fright. Her hair was limp and her face pale with a thin sheen of sweat across her forehead. She grabbed a couple paper towels and rinsed her face, then poofed her hair, untangling it with her fingers. Chiding herself for coming to the office looking like a wrung-out mop head, Hannah rubbed her belly and whispered, “I hope you get your Daddy’s hair. It never looks stringy. Of course, it might if it were long.”
Having done all she could to be presentable, Hannah left the bathroom in search of Drake. She found him sitting in front of a monitor scanning files. “Hi Honey.”
It was still strange calling someone ‘Honey’.
“You’re up and about? Are you feeling better?” Drake and Hannah didn’t use the dreaded ‘c’ word in everyday conversation. They saved it for office visits with Marie and the occasional discussion of a possible discovery in the files. After three hours, Drake and his team were nowhere near to finding anything helpful for Hannah. The medical files they did find related solely to the mind control experiments, making no mention at all of Hannah or any special treatment she might have received.
Hannah shrugged, “I’m okay. Just tired of sitting at home. Is there anything I can help you with here?”
“Not really. This is the last tower. I sent everyone home a half hour ago. So far none of these have medical records. I found a c
omputer with blueprints, diagrams, and test subject files. It’s plugged in over there if you want to search through the folders and see if anything stands out. You might recognize something from your time there that is meaningless to me,” Drake said. When Hannah met Drake, his forehead was smooth. Now, it seemed that he was perpetually frowning with deep worry lines.
“Did T.J North come back from vacation?”
Drake stopped clicking files. He turned, “T.J. North is dead, at least according to public records. Suicide.”
“But?” Hannah asked.
“He didn’t commit suicide. They are either covering up his continued existence or he was murdered because of what he knew.”
“He’s still alive,” Hannah said. She thought back to her confinement. When T.J. consulted on her treatment, the others spoke of him with respect. They liked him.
“What makes you think so? Drake asked.
“The mind control doctors looked up to him like he was a big deal. I’m not sure what his importance is, but in that group, he had a high status. Is there someone in your files by the name of Manny Norton? The doctor who always ran my checkups introduced himself to me as Manny Norton, but one of the techs called him T.J. once. I saw him almost react. It was like he was angry at the tech, but couldn’t tell him off.”
While Hannah checked files on the computer that seemed most likely to have information about her, Drake contacted his sources and asked them to find any information they could on Manny Norton. Hannah rubbed her back while she scrolled through information in a wild hunt to find her own salvation.
“Shall we call it a day?” Drake asked. It was only five o’clock but he was exhausted from traveling.
“Yes.” Hannah pushed the word out. She realized that she hadn’t touched the mouse in over ten minutes. She had been sitting in front of the screen with her teeth clenched and her eyes closed waiting for the pain to pass.
When she stood, Hannah realized that she didn’t have the strength to stay standing. She sat back down, hoping it didn’t look like she had fallen into the chair, which she practically had.
Drake shut down his computer and said, “Let me help you.”
Hannah nodded.
His body felt so warm. When he lifted her as if she weren’t an oversized pregnant woman, the pain receded. His touch stopped the pain. No matter what happened, Drake would always be her miracle. Just falling in love with him would be enough. Hannah told herself over and over, how lucky she was to have these months of love.
He carried her down the stairs. Hannah chided him. “You can’t carry me all the way home.”
Drake resettled her in his arms and said, “Just watch me.”
They crossed the parking lot and then the street. As he walked down the sidewalk, Hannah said, “I can walk. I’m strong enough.”
“I took your statement as a challenge. Relax. I promise I won’t drop you, and we’re almost home. Just don’t ask me to carry you when you’re at nine months,” Drake teased.
Hannah laughed. Drake always knew the right words to say.
Drake tucked Hannah into bed. He’d tried first while she was in her street clothes, but Hannah insisted on changing into her sleeping t-shirt. Drake flirted with her while she changed, which made her feel better about her ever-growing body. He insisted on reading to her and had just found a book when the phone rang.
Throwing the book onto the bed, Drake said, “I’ve got to get this.”
The conversation went long. Hannah listened from the bedroom, getting the gist of it. Drake returned to the bedroom in triumph. “Sven found Manny. You were right. He knew everything we needed. He agreed to meet me in Denver.”
“Do you think it’s safe?”
“No, but I will be taking precautions.”
Hannah wrapped her arms around Drake, taking comfort in his strength. One day their parting would be forever. It seemed every time they got to a place where they were comfortable together, someone needed him or he found another lead on cancer treatment. “Don’t go,” she said.
“It could be the only chance we have to find a cure,” Drake said. His slid his hands down Hannah’s buttocks and then pulled her closer.
Hannah nestled into his warmth. She whispered, “Most people count their lives in years. I don’t know how many days I’ll have left. I want to spend what I have left with you.”
Drake held her, his arms light as if she would break. He kissed her cheek and said, “I want years. Let me fight for you.”
“It’s a trap. To get you to Colorado. There’s nothing there for us. Nothing left to try.” Hannah hated the way Drake’s arms tensed when she said that. The way he tightened and withdrew. Nothing would save her now. It was time for him to admit it so that he could prepare himself.
“Don’t say that. Don’t lose hope. I need you waiting for me.”
Hannah lied to Drake when she said, “I won’t lose hope, not as long as you are cheering me on.”
She had already given up. Her intellectual side had acknowledged that her body had betrayed her. That the cancer was spreading. That she would be lucky if her daughter survived even if she could not. Her only hope was for Noel. For Drake and Noel, she would fight, but Hannah had run out of hope.
They kissed goodbye, and Hannah thought, not for the first time, that she would never see Drake again.
Chapter 15
THE CLOUDS WERE HUGE and puffy, white cotton against a blue backdrop, as if painted there purposely for this moment. Drake leaned his head against the airplane window, trying to calm himself. Deep in the depths of his soul, he was afraid. Not just a tiny little nervous twinge, this was terror, buried under a thousand layers of bureaucracy and military bearing, of showing the world who’s boss, and leaving no trace of vulnerability.
But deep inside, Drake was that little boy who stuck fingers in his ears when his Mom cried in the middle of the night all those weeks after his Dad passed, also from cancer. Drake didn’t have the luxury of calling his mother either. She followed Dad when Drake turned eighteen. Money bought a lot of things, but it couldn’t buy health. And it didn’t buy happiness, either. It just allowed for a lot more distractions when a person needed to run away.
There was no one to call, no one to ask for advice. He and Hannah had started everything wrong. He’d made a complete mess of things.
Drake wasn’t the type to linger on doubts. When dark thoughts formed like tender mist in his mind, he drew on the warmth of his hope and optimism. Like a warm sun, the optimism fragmented the misty depression and blew it away.
Once the plane landed, Drake picked up a car at the rental agency. He didn’t need to put anyone else in danger. He drove to the address Manny gave him. It was a coffee shop.
It was ten-fifteen in the morning. A woman sat in the corner scribbling in a notebook. Otherwise, the coffee shop was empty. Drake ordered a plain coffee and a blueberry muffin. Sweets weren’t really his thing, with his preference toward steak and mashed potatoes.
He was supposed to meet Manny at ten-thirty.
At ten-forty, Drake ordered another coffee. At eleven a sandwich. At twelve, he left the coffee shop. A flyer was stuck to his windshield. It read Being followed. Call 555-9309.
Drake drove to the nearest gas station. He changed three dollars for quarters. The pay phone was deserted. Drake called the number.
“Manny here.” The line sounded like an echo. Someone was listening.
“It’s Drake. Where are you?”
Manny gave him another address which Drake scribbled down.
Drake wasn’t content with another address. He said, “Why didn’t you just come inside the shop? If you could put a piece of paper on my windshield, you could come in and talk.”
“It’s not like that, man. I can’t just meet you in a coffee shop.”
“And I get the feeling you’re yanking me around so your handler can get his hands on me. I need help for Hannah. I’m willing to pay.”
“I don’t need your money. I just
need help getting out. Unlock your passenger door when you drive here.”
So it was a trap. Drake said, “I’m not going to be your sitting duck. The deal is off.”
He nudged the receiver down and dialed Sven.
It took two rings. Before Sven could say a word, Drake said, “Hey, Buddy, I have a few ski slopes for us to try. Looks like I’m coming home empty-handed.”
The word ski slopes was a code to Sven. Someone is listening. We need to fake this call.
“My boss never gives me any time off, the jerk,” Sven joked. He had been trying to retire from the company for months. It was time for an extended break. He wouldn’t leave while Drake needed him but the time was coming and soon. He and Minka had a wedding to plan.
“Someday soon, it will happen. So...Manny...” Drake opened the door. Sven would proceed with caution because of Drake’s ski slope warning. It was a code between Drake and Sven with each sport assigned a specific meaning. Anything ski related meant someone was listening to the conversation. It wouldn’t make sense to anyone but Drake or Sven.
Sven asked, “What did he say? Is he coming with you?”
“He left a note on my car with a phone number. I called. Now he wants me to drive to a new address with my passenger door unlocked. I told him the deal was off and hung up.”
“Is it?” Sven asked. While they exchanged real information, there was always that undercurrent of trickery. Sven and Drake would have to be cunning in their exchange of information.
Drake’s jaw tightened. He said, “I’m alone in enemy territory. I can’t afford to make mistakes.”
The air was chilled, as if the cold had swept down from the mountains. With a deep sense of foreboding, Drake watched the road. It was a busy commercial area full of mini-malls and fast food. He didn’t want to leave without Manny or at least Manny’s research, but every minute he stayed brought danger closer to his doorstep.
“What are you going to do?” Sven asked when Drake didn’t say anything else.
“I don’t know.”
And that was the sum of Drake’s real helplessness. He might be playing a role on the phone for anyone listening, but for the first time in a long while, Drake felt adrift. For a man who could control armies, who could buy anything, Drake was stuck. Sven said, “Is he setting a trap or running scared?”