Ten minutes later she walked into the cafe area, expecting to see Mike and Bob still chatting with the number crunchers from Brown’s. Their table was empty. She rushed to the window and couldn’t see them in the street.
‘They’ve gone for a walk.’ She turned and saw Oliver seated at the table opposite. ‘Things looked pretty heavy for a bit and I think to get things back on track they’ve all gone for a walk.’
Pretty heavy. What did that mean?
‘Thanks, Oliver. I thought I’d join them for a bit, but if they’re not here I’ll join you.’
Trust him. Mike is not a fool.
She turned and grinned at Oliver. ‘What are you still doing here?’
‘Gordon’s gone for a feed at the pub, and I’m enjoying your goodies while I’m whiling my time. It doesn’t happen often.’
Despite their rivalry he was her favourite colleague in the department. He had been a notorious party boy when he first arrived at Sloane & Sloane a month after she had, but he soon settled down. He had it all—charisma, good looks and brains. Oliver’s charm calmed their nervous clients, just like he’d calmed her before many a meeting.
At his morning tea welcome, Gordon spoke of his potential. Oliver hadn’t let anyone down in that regard, and had kept his head buried in work.
‘Rach, did Gordon tell you I’m not going to New York? I pulled out, so the secondment is all yours if you want it.’
Her mouth fell open. Things were moving so fast it was frightening. All the dots were now aligned.
She joined him at the table. ‘No. After the Lyongate deal I thought you’d be heading on the first plane to the Big Apple.’
He shook his head. ‘The Lyongate deal broke me. It did some serious damage.’
Rachael eased back into her seat. She had always enjoyed their late hour chats. Together they had navigated each other through the notoriously difficult path towards partnership.
‘How so?’
‘It all came to a head the day Sarah was born, our first. Kate goes into labour early evening. I’m still at work trying to knock out some documents. At four am my mother calls and tells me it’s all happening. I race over to Royal Prince Alfred and get there in time to see the birth.’
Rachael took a deep breath sensing his next words.
‘But then I went back to work. We still had to get those bloody documents out. At ten we’re done so I thought I’d see Kate, and my mother met me in the foyer. She pulled me down. She said it’s not enough to rock up like the conquering hero with the largest bouquet of flowers in the joint, when all Kate wanted was me.’
His bloodshot eyes grew moist. ‘I vowed from that moment I’d be there. At the end of the day they’re all I’ve got.’
She strummed her fingers against her table. She’d heard similar stories throughout her career, and yet, very little had changed in the workplace. Clients demanded more and more each year, and technology provided the means.
She let out a long sigh. ‘You get so caught up in work; it’s to the exclusion of almost everything else.’
He gave her a lop-sided smile, the one that sent many of the girls in the office swooning. ‘Absolutely.’
She eyed him, curious. ‘What next then?’
He stood up. ‘Stay tuned, Rach, it’s a work-in-progress.’
She liked the sound of that, and stood by the front door and watched him until he was out of sight. She turned to Shar who was wiping down the display cabinets.
‘He’s been my main rival since day one and now he’s walking away from it.’
‘Smart boy,’ said Shar.
She ignored her sister’s comment; some things were too hard to argue. ‘Do you know where Bob and Mike went?’
‘Bob took the Brown’s bosses to the pub and I think Mike went for a run.’
She digested that snippet of information. Shar handed her a piece of paper in her hand.
‘Mike said you might like to run your eye over these.’
‘The orders?’
Shar nodded.
Her eyes skimmed over Mike’s notes. She was impressed. ‘He’s done well, Shar, much better than I thought.’
‘Go,’ said Shar. ‘You want to be with him, go. I can finish up here.’
***
It was dark by the time she reached Mike’s home. She ran down the side, all the outside lights switching on at her approach. Molly stood up and stretched on the verandah and ran up to her.
She had just sat down when she heard his footsteps down the side and her anxiety grew.
When he turned the corner, his face lit up. She drew in a long breath and stood up. By the time he reached her his face was serious. Her heart started to pound.
He already knows.
He took her in his arms and kissed her. Her hands gripped the top of his arms and she wanted to hold him close a little longer.
He stared down at her, and frowned. ‘What’s all this? You’ve got me at a bad time after a run.’
She didn’t mind and took in another long deep breath.
‘It doesn’t matter. You smell of my favourite scents: ginger and citrus.’
He laughed. ‘I’ve spent too long in your kitchen.’
He grabbed her hands and held them to his chest.
‘What’s going on? I thought you’d be at home celebrating.’
‘Oh, they’re all on a high and Bob’s still out with the Brown’s people. You did well with the negotiations, better than I imagined.’
Mike nodded. His expression thoughtful.
‘What’s really going on, Rach?’
Her body trembled a little under his watchful gaze.
‘I’m going back to Sydney this weekend. Gordon said he’d back me for a partnership and Oliver’s given up any idea of a New York secondment. It’s my time.’
The words came out in a rush. She closed her eyes, not wanting to see Mike’s face. She’d made her announcement and her gut twisted.
You coward.
Heart pounding, she opened her eyes. Mike’s head was down. A smidgen of relief filtered through her.
‘I’m sorry, Mike, but Sydney—New York—is my future.’ Her throat was dry as she struggled to say the words.
He looked up. His eyes were a mirror of what she’d seen this morning, the heated gaze that told her he loved her. That gaze sent her mad with longing. That gaze confirmed it was time to leave him.
‘You really want this?’ he asked.
Her head bobbed in a quick nod. ‘Yes, I’ve always wanted it.’
He leaned across, grabbed her shoulders, and forced her to look at him.
‘Answer me this then, what are you running away from?’
The raw energy behind his words shocked her. Gordon’s words about Mike fighting hard to keep her flashed in her mind. She was witness to that now and her heart almost broke.
Her eyes never left his face. ‘I’m not. I’m running to a future, something I’ve always wanted.’
‘Why not here with me? You know how I feel. I love you, Rach.’
Her heart almost shuddered to a halt. He loves me. She savoured those words as they reverberated inside her head. The fact that he’d said it amazed her. Deep down she knew. Her instincts were screaming to reach out to him. Apart from Nancy and Bert, nobody, but nobody, had ever said they loved her.
She gazed up at him in wonder. ‘I know, and I wish it weren’t so. I think I should leave before we both have regrets.’
The colour in his eyes changed, deepening, and she saw his vulnerability; every part of her quaked.
Rach inched away, letting her common sense rule. ‘The timing’s all wrong. We never made any promises, we accepted the way things were and now it’s time we got on with our lives.’
Mike pursed his lips. ‘You’re a stronger person than I am. I couldn’t walk away from what we have, and our potential.’
There it was, ‘potential’, a tiny word that carried so much weight. A word she’d heard all her life, which hung around her ne
ck like a bad smell, and still had to be dealt with. She refused to think about that now. It was the time to leave; and it would be a long night of discussion with Nancy and everybody else.
Biting her bottom lip, she lifted her gaze and studied him for one last time. Disbelief was etched into his rugged face, a face she’d grown to read so well. ‘Goodbye, Mike, I’m trying to make this break as quick and painless as possible.’
Without another word she spun around and walked as fast as she could down the side of his home. She heard Mike’s footsteps behind.
‘Wait up, Rach.’
Standing rooted to the spot in the centre of his front yard, her heart ballooned with a mix of love and hope she struggled to contain.
‘No, Mike, please,’ she whispered.
‘Just ask yourself every day, am I happy? That’s all I want for you.’
His softly spoken words swirled about her. She nodded, and opened her mouth to speak, and that’s where it stopped. All her words had fused in the back of her throat gagging her. Her feet were like two stiff boards as she stumbled to his small fence and climbed over it.
Hugging herself she walked down Locker Street. At the top of the street she paused to gather her breath, but there was no escaping the thoughts that whirled inside her head.
Was Mike right? Was she running away from something? Hardly. She’d worked hard to have a future; she’d left Mindalby all those years ago for a future. She’d left with Nancy’s and Bert’s blessing and that mattered.
Nancy’s parting words that hot summer day when she’d left Mindalby for uni had been to go as far as she could. What was wrong with that? Happiness? Was that even real? When did you know? Were there any signs? There weren’t too many happy markers in her life to date; she could remember a few ‘fun’ moments, but happiness? She didn’t know how to measure that.
It had been six long years since she’d put in her application to start the partnership process. She remembered well standing before Gordon in a meeting with ten other candidates. All had either left or, like Oliver, had changed course. She had the stomach for it and had stayed. Didn’t that count for something? Wasn’t the partnership her reward?
She paced out the front of the Henderson home, not quite ready to face them. She rubbed at her forehead.
Questions flooded her brain as she continued to walk. The bakery shone bright and beautiful under the rays from the nearest street light. If there was one thing she was proud of it was the bakery. It had taken more than a lick of paint to turn it around. Her heart and soul were stamped into every inch of it. At least there was some success there.
Success—what a funny word that was. How is that measured? In Sydney it was there for the taking. All she had to do was follow the well-worn corporate path and, with Gordon’s backing, who knew where things would end for her. Stop sitting on the fence, Rach. She spun around and headed back to the Henderson home. Yes, it would be good to be back in Sydney, back in familiar territory, and back to a world she understood.
Chapter 20
Rach wound down her car window. The cool air of the late afternoon rushed in and she took a deep breath. It was intoxicating, a little earthy with nips of sweetness coming through. After driving for the past seven or so hours from Sydney she was a bit stiff and sore. Rach gave her arms a little stretch and rolled her shoulders.
Her clock showed four forty-five. The timing was perfect, Mike should still be at Watson’s Park doing what he enjoyed, having an early training session with his team.
It had been two weeks since she’d walked out on him. Selfishly. He could turn her away; he had that right.
For a Saturday afternoon, Mindalby was not so quiet. Two joggers in matching lime green runners ran in front of her, and their small fluffy dog ran behind with its tongue hanging out. Outside the quilting shop two women were deep in conversation. She drove slowly past the bakery. Nancy was serving and the four small tables were full.
She drove down Waratah Road and spotted Shar jogging with the Bush Babes. Rach tooted her horn. Shar looked about, saw her and gave her the thumbs up.
At Watson’s Park she spotted Mike and his kids. She hit the brakes. Her heart ramped up a gear as she parked in the small carpark. Mike was in the centre of the ground kicking the ball to each kid, who in turn dribbled the ball back to him.
A flash of pink caught her eye and she groaned out loud. It was the Bush Babes. She climbed out of her car and glared at them. She knew what they were up to and had no intention of entertaining all and sundry today. The women waved, as if they didn’t have a care in the world, and started to run the circuit of the oval.
Shar ran past her grinning like she’d won lotto. ‘It’s a free country. We’re entitled to be here.’
She slammed her door shut, wrapped her coat tight about her, and made her way across to the oval. One by one as the kids spotted her, they stopped and stared. Their on-field banter and laughter ceased. Mike turned.
She’d been fearless when she’d gone into battle for clients, but this was different, this was Mike, and her nerves were deserting her. His face was unreadable. For a man whose emotions ran free for all to see, it didn’t get any worse. He’d shut himself down. He’s learnt that from me.
Rach walked up to him, slowly closing the distance between them. He didn’t move to meet her. She wasn’t surprised, she’d hurt him to the core. There was one thing on her mind and no one, not even Mike, was going to stop her.
She nodded in the direction of the goal posts. It was the only part of the ground free of eavesdroppers. ‘Can we talk?’
Mike kicked the ball to the boy nearest him. ‘Back in five, guys.’
As they walked, warmth oozed into her body. She couldn’t get enough of this man and she’d missed him. Her arms itched to touch him, to hug him and hold him tight. He’d agreed to walk with her. That was a sign, it gave her hope.
They stood by one of the goal posts and her heart swelled as she feasted her eyes on him. He looked good, maybe a little thinner and a little paler. He still had the five o’clock shadow she loved to run her fingers over. He caught her gaze and raised an eyebrow.
‘I didn’t think there was anything left to say.’
Her heart pounded so loud it was the only thing she could hear. ‘I’m a lawyer, Mike, there’s always something left to say.’
‘Are you still trying to convince me of something, or yourself?’ he asked quietly.
He didn’t need convincing of anything. He was strong, capable and at home with himself. ‘I don’t need convincing, not anymore,’ she whispered. ‘I got it wrong, so very wrong.’
They’d both arrived in Mindalby, alone and without a family, and she’d been blind to what the town offered. Just like she’d been blind to what he offered. Well, the blinkers were off. She stepped closer to him.
He grimaced. ‘Why are you back?’
Oh god, he’s not giving anything away. Her throat went tight. ‘You.’ She almost screamed the word at him. ‘I’ve packed up and come home. Mindalby is my home and I’m wondering if you’re interested in me being part of your family.’ The words came out awkward and rushed, but they were out. She’d said it and every bone in her body quivered.
Mike let out a deep sigh, tinged with pain. ‘That’s not good enough, Rach. You were happy to walk a fortnight ago.’
Rach swallowed hard. Oh god, where to start? ‘I’m a stray from way back, Mike, always cautious and watching my back. I didn’t know what you were talking about when you mentioned happiness.’ She ran a nervous hand through her hair. ‘After a couple of days in Sydney I realised the happiest weeks of my life were spent here with you.’
She met his gaze again, and bit on her bottom lip. ‘I love you so much, Mike, it hurts.’
It took a full few seconds for Mike to respond. His eyes widened. ‘You love me?’ His voice sounded raw and expectant. She absorbed his reaction and loved him even more.
Rach couldn’t contain herself any more, and smiled up at him. ‘
There are far more important things in life, and my work is not the main game. You taught me that.’
Mike frowned. ‘It’s been the main game for you and you’ve worked damned hard at it. Won’t you miss the buzz of corporate life?’
‘No.’ The word came out strong and clear, surprising her. It was true, she knew that now. He was right to bring it up. ‘I wasn’t happy and I didn’t even know it.’ Rach took a deep breath. ‘I’m sorry I got scared. Will you have me back?’
‘Scared of what?’ His big brown eyes softened as they zeroed in on her. This man was full of love.
She swallowed hard. ‘Of us. I couldn’t believe what we had could be so good. Nothing in my life tops it.’ Nor ever would.
He held out his arms and she fell into them. ‘Oh, Rach, come here and get used to it.’
She snuggled closer, and her body hummed hearing the solid beat of his heart. ‘Is that a yes?’
Mike cupped her chin and tilted her head, forcing her to look at him. She looked deep into his eyes and saw his honesty.
‘Yes, yes, yes.’ His voice was raw with need and love. Nothing else mattered. Whatever happened to them now they were together, they would work it out together.
A burst of loud clapping made her turn her head. The Bush Babes waved and grinned as Mike’s soccer team ran past the goal post, shouting and whistling at them.
‘Good one,’ shouted Shar.
Rach gave her sister a wave and snuggled into Mike, resting her head against his chest. She would never get enough of him.
‘What about Gordon?’
Chuckling, she eased back and pulled out her phone from her pocket. With a dramatic flourish she switched it off. ‘I walked, Mike. Gordon’s happy for me to do contract work only, nothing more. My unit is up for sale. I’m here for good and you’d better get used to it.’
He leaned down, gently pulled her hair back from her face and kissed her. ‘This is the best decision you’ve ever made.’
Chapter 21
It was almost lunchtime as Rach put the finishing touches to Mike’s favourite salad. His home was brimming with people. All the Henderson clan and friends had accepted the invitation to their engagement party. The smell of meat cooking on the barbecue whetted her appetite. Bob’s words drifted in. His well-worn jokes were going down a treat with Mike’s father. She heard the soft patter of feet on the wooden floorboards.
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