The crowd roared. Even if Kaden wasn’t starting goalie tonight, he would still warm up with the team. The guys skated around the ice, some cutting in front of the net, others skating around the back of it.
Dom skated behind the net and looked up with a wave and a smile to where they were sitting. Hailee beamed with excitement and love as she waved back.
Alison’s stomach was already a bundle of nerves, as she watched Kaden hop onto the ice. He was dressed in all his equipment, pads and helmet. Her head said, maybe he won’t see me, but her heart hoped he’d look over.
As Kaden rounded the corner behind the net, he looked up into the crowd, and his eyes stopped on her. She forgot that he always would search the crowd for her, again, she blamed it on pregnancy brain.
She couldn’t move. His smile showed through his mask, but he didn’t wave like Dom did. Kaden’s hesitation was obvious. He glided around the net and down to center ice where the Renegades were arcing around and skating back towards the net, while Los Angeles skated in a half circle on the other side of the rink.
I should look away, eat my nachos, do anything to avoid looking in his direction when he comes back around.
But she didn’t. Kaden rounded the ice again. Their eyes met as he did. He stopped in front of the net, grabbed the water bottle that Dom had put there, and propped his mask on top of his head to take a drink. His blond hair was already damp and his face flushed. But his eyes never left Alison.
“Maybe you’ll get your happily ever after tonight,” Hailee teased.
Shaking off the daze she was in, it took a moment to process what Hailee had said.
“Nah, things don’t always work out that way.” Happily ever afters don’t happen for everyone. She scooped a bunch of barbeque pork onto a chip and popped it into her mouth. Her heart sank. She always hoped that her happily ever after would be with Kaden. They were so good together.
After wiping her hand on a napkin, she rubbed her belly. As much as she wanted a future with him, she had already had a future mapped out for herself. With his baby.
The players started to take warm-up shots at the net, and all the missed ones rattled loudly off the glass in front of them. Luckily the netting above them caught any rogue shots that flipped up. But the deafening smack of frozen rubber pucks against the plexiglass made her jump every time.
Butterflies danced in her stomach and acid backed up into her throat. She closed her eyes and took a quiet moment to settle her insides down, willing everything to go back to where it belonged.
Kaden hung back close to the bench for the rest of warm-ups.
“You okay, Ali?” Hailee asked, her face close to Alison, and her voice as low as she could make it and still be heard.
After a few more deep breaths, she would be. Finally, she answered. “Yep. The sickness has been the worst part of this whole thing. I hope it’s over soon.”
Once the game started, Dom was in goal and on their end of the ice. Hailee was swooning like normal, and it made Alison’s chest hurt. She should be fangirling too. Instead she was sitting here eating her nachos, trying her best to be invisible. Until she heard the words she longed to hear.
“Cotton candy here!”
Jumping at the sound of the cotton candy guy’s animated call, she raised her hand, and he tossed her a bag of the pink fluffy sugar treat. She handed him her money and tore open the clear plastic. The sweet smell surrounded her as she dove into the fluffiness.
“Oh, so good.” She groaned as the spun sugar melted in her mouth.
“How can you eat that stuff?” Hailee asked.
“Want some?” She pushed the bag towards Hailee in jest.
“Are you kidding? I eat enough junk as it is. Pure sugar is an addition I don’t need. I still need to fit into my wedding dress, you know.” Hailee comically pushed her away.
Alison spent most of the first period looking at the ground, trying to calm her churning stomach. The bathroom was farther away than she wanted to run at the moment. Barbeque pork, nacho cheese and jalapenos might not have been her best idea. Too late now. She was getting good at willing away the sickness, and it finally leveled off during the second period. But by now she’d missed half of the game.
Checking the scoreboard, she saw that the Renegades were down 0–1. If it hadn’t been for Dom, Los Angeles would’ve had a lot more than just the one goal. Finally feeling better, she concentrated on the ice.
Los Angeles rushed into the Renegades’ end, leaving their defense desperate to catch up. Their large, burly defenseman tumbled into Dom as another player shot at the net. From on the ice, flat on his back, Dom grabbed the puck out of the air and made the save.
“Nice save, Dom! Woohoo!” She danced in her seat.
Hailee wasn’t cheering. She was quiet, along with the rest of the arena, and staring at the score board from the edge of her seat. Focusing her attention back on the game, Alison realized play had been stopped and hadn’t started up again like normal.
Dom was still lying on the ice, and the linesman was talking to him. Tyler Kidd and Kris Lafleur were also at his side, and eventually they helped him up off of the ice. The crowd clapped when Dom gave a little wave, acknowledging that he was okay before heading to the bench with Tyler and Kris skating at his side.
Hailee was still silent.
“Hailee, he’s okay.”
After a moment, she finally sat back in her seat and spoke. “Yeah.”
“He skated off by himself. He’s fine.”
She shook her head and a shaky smile crossed her lips. “Yeah, you’re right.”
But with Dom in the locker room, that meant Kaden was in net and probably would be for the rest of the game. Just as her brain was comprehending that thought, he skated into net and began his pregame ritual, just a shorter version. He stretched and dug his skates into the ice, while pushing away all of the snow around his net.
While watching his every move, excitement and nervousness built up in her, as the acid crept back up Alison’s throat. She wasn’t prepared for him to play.
Play restarted with Kaden as the Renegades netminder. They were still down by one, and Los Angeles wasn’t letting up. “Is it just me, or is LA’s goalie really good?” He was stopping every shot.
“I guess,” Hailee said, not really paying attention to the conversation.
Alison didn’t want to be here anymore, but her friend needed her. The only thing keeping her in her seat was the fact that Kaden was on the other end of the ice. If Dom didn’t come back in the third, she didn’t know what she was going to do. Sitting right behind Kaden in net was not the plan. For now, she could deal with it for Hailee’s sake.
Hailee nervously looked from the ice to the owner’s box. “Maybe I should go see if they know anything… I don’t think they’ll let me in the locker room.” She looked back down at the bench. “Maybe I should try.”
“Hailee, he’ll be fine.” Alison hadn’t been convinced of her own reassuring words to Hailee until Dom finally reappeared. The crowd clapped as the big screen on the scoreboard showed him returning to the bench. He had a baseball cap on in place of his helmet. Which meant Kaden was staying in goal.
The intermission came quickly, to Alison’s relief. Hailee decided to try to get some info on Dom from the locker room. Alison looked around at the rush of people exiting the seats to either get in line for the bathrooms or the concessions stands. As much as she had to use the restroom, she could avoid standing in line if she waited until the third period started.
Scrolling through social media, she found plenty of talk about Dom, and it all said he was fine. Just going through concussion protocol, but no concerns.
At least her mind was at ease about Dom while she waited on Hailee. She wasn’t so okay with Kaden being in goal though; she wasn’t prepared for this. Would Hailee be mad if I left? I do have my car.
The idea of sitting behind Kaden in goal made the nausea come back. She hadn’t been this close to him since he sugges
ted they “make this work.” Her heart hurt as she thought about it. I just want him to love me. Us.
Returning just before play restarted, Hailee’s expression was relaxed. “He’s okay. He was dizzy after that hit and they wanted to rule out concussion. There’s no sign of one, but he’ll sit out the rest of the game just to be sure, then get rechecked in the morning.”
“Told you he’d be okay.” She half-hugged Hailee, as much as she could sitting in these seats.
The horn sounded, and the players returned to the ice for the third and final period of the game. Dominic sat on the bench, while Kaden took his place in the net right in front of them. His stare was locked on her. No matter how many times she looked away, her eyes always went back to him. And he was still watching her.
“Ali, you going to be okay?”
Swallowing hard, she decided she could do this. “Yeah, I’ll be fine.”
She barely got the words out before he nodded to her, and the nausea slid up her throat. Doing everything under her power to push it down, she knew it was no use. Her heart raced. And when he took position in goal and looked back at her one last time, right before they blew the whistle, she could barely contain her composure. She rushed out of her seat and raced up the steps to the bathroom.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Kaden
Kaden took one last look up at Ali before the period started, but instead of a bashful smile or the nervous glance that he expected, what he saw was much more concerning. She looked a bit green before she tore off up the steps and into the concession area of the arena. Maybe it was her morning sickness acting up, or something she ate. Worry and concern filled his gut, but the whistle blew and he needed to focus on the game.
The team was still losing by one, and the guys looked tired. Even with Coach Walker’s “never give up” speech during the intermission, the guys had no gusto to their play. From his vantage point in net, Kaden noted Tyler and Kris trying to rally the team. Pat and Sam were stepping up too, passing, making big hits, and taking any shot they could. But nothing was getting by that netminder.
Seven minutes into the third period, Sam finally slipped one through to LA’s net, and the Renegades were on the board. The crowd roared with relief. They needed to win this game, and with Dom out and Kaden’s focus skewed, things were looking grim.
“One more, guys! Just one more!” he yelled.
Before the face-off, he glanced back to see if Ali had returned yet. But her seat was empty. Hailee saw him looking, and shrugged. His stomach flopped. Was she okay? And why wasn’t Hailee going to check on her? Checking the clock, he noted she’d been gone for almost fifteen minutes now. Maybe the lines were long, or maybe something was wrong.
He was still having trouble pulling his focus back to the game when the rush came at his net. The big guy who knocked Dom down was headed right towards him. Guarding his goal, Kaden dug his skates into the ice, preparing for the hit. Right before he reached the goal crease, Patrick came from the wing and knocked the goon out of Kaden’s path.
“That a boy, Dubois!” Kaden yelled, keeping his eye on the play.
The whistle blew, stopping play at his doorstep. A scrum had started by the bench, between Torin and one of the LA forwards. Looking at the big screen, Kaden saw the forward shove Torin into LA’s bench. A few guys grabbed at him, causing him to lose his footing. Luc stood up for him and took a swing at the guy, while Torin got back up and waled on the closest LA player.
It gave Kaden a breather and a chance to see if Ali was back. She wasn’t. And now Hailee was gone, too. His chest ached with worry, and he had about five minutes left to play. All they had to do was score, and if possible keep the puck out of his end. His focus was torn, now that he was even more worried about Ali. Regardless, he had a job to do.
The puck dropped. Focusing back on the game, he yelled to his team “C’mon! One goal, that’s all we need, guys!”
The teams were at even strength, each with one guy in the penalty box from the fight. Sam fought to keep the puck in LA’s end. A bad pass to Kris ended in him missing it and LA taking control. Taking deep breaths, Kaden was ready. They’re not getting past me. We need this win. If they lost this game, they could kiss the postseason goodbye this year.
Movement from behind him in the stands caught his attention. Something purple, maybe Hailee’s hair. The girls knew better than to enter or exit the seating during play. But because he was still so worried about Alison, it took his focus away just enough… And a shot from his right side flipped directly over his shoulder and into the back of the net. Fucking hell.
The crowd collectively groaned. While LA celebrated with one minute left to go in the game, Kaden slammed his stick over his goal in frustration and anger, breaking it in half. During his tantrum, he noticed that neither Ali nor Hailee were in the stands. That only angered him more, that he had let his focus be interrupted for nothing. He knew better than that.
The crowd that was normally mute to his ears was loud and in his face. They screamed insults. “You had one job, O’Conner!” or “O’Conner sucks!”
A tap to his pads brought him out of his daze. Tyler had brought him a new goalie stick, as the officials gathered up the pieces of the broken one. “Don’t let them get to you, K-man. We’re all responsible for this one.”
The final buzzer rang through the already almost empty arena. The faces of his teammates reflected how he felt. They had lost, and their hopes of a playoff run were shot to hell. They had needed to win this game, the last game of the regular season, to make the last playoff spot in their division. Now it was just over.
Kaden quickly exited the ice, his heart heavy and full of guilt. His anger overflowed as he slammed his stick against the brick wall of the tunnel, and like the first one, it splintered in half. The loss was all on him. Reporters waited outside the locker room anxiously. He needed to calm down before they approached him. A meltdown caught on tape was never good for image.
Stripping his skates and pads off and heaving them into his locker space, he didn’t say a word before exiting the room. Barefoot, sweaty, and pissed off, he went directly to the gym. His breathing was labored and his heart felt like it was going to pound out of his chest. He knew only two things. One, he needed to get this pissed-off attitude in check. Two, he couldn’t be around anyone until he did.
Searching the room for something to beat the hell out of, he came up empty-handed. Instead, he hopped on a treadmill and just started running. He ran out of anger. He ran for no good reason. He ran hard until his legs were numb and he thought he might collapse.
“O’Conner. There you are.” Dom slammed the door behind him. “Coach is looking for you. You’re up last for the media.”
“Yeah… Good times,” he said, through his heavy breathing as the treadmill slowed down.
“They’re still with Ty, so you have plenty of time. You know how our captain loves to hear himself talk,” Dom joked, obviously trying to lighten the heavy mood.
“How are you, anyway?”
Dom shrugged. “Good. I was just shaken up. Sorry you took the brunt of the game, bro. I wanted to get back out there, but you know how it is. They like to be cautious. Sucks that I had to end the season riding the bench, though.”
“End of the fucking season… It’s my fault. I took my focus away… for one second…” His head burned like it was on fire. Anger surged through his arms as his fists searched for something to punch.
“Hey, Kaden, we play as a team and we lose as one. Don’t forget that. Ask any of the guys and they’ll tell you they are pissed, and the loss is their fault because they should’ve scored. We have an entire locker room full of anger and regret. No one is happy it’s over. Some of them will leave here and drink their anger away, others will hit the gym like you and maybe spend hours exerting energy. I’m pissed too, Kaden, but it’s over.”
How Dom was so calm over this escaped Kaden. Their season was over. The only thing they had to look forward to was the go
lf course.
“This should be the one thing in my life right now… that I can control. I could’ve stopped that… had I been paying attention… it’s my job… Ali was there… but something happened… and she left and never came back to her seat.” His words were still separated by his heavy breaths as he walked up and down the gym floor, trying to cool down.
“Look, we will all deal with it and get over it. We will all come back stronger and better next year. You know why? Because that’s what we do! Now do what you need to do, and then get your ass in there, okay? Coach is mad, but don’t give him any more reason to be pissed off. I’ll do my best to stall.”
Once Dom was gone, Kaden looked around the empty gym. He wasn’t ready to go out there yet. The feelings pent up inside him were likely to explode if he did. Choosing the sled push, he piled on as many weights as he could handle, and then added four more. He pushed it up and down the track only a few times before his body ached and his muscles gave out. Stopping mid-track, he had no energy left to push it. He collapsed beside the metal bars, and all of his bottled-up emotions let go. The game, the loss, Ali, and his mom.
Maybe they had ended their season earlier than planned. It sucked. It was the worst feeling he ever felt. But maybe, just maybe, it was a blessing in disguise. He had so much shit going on in his life. Blowing their shot at the playoffs might make a bad situation better. If that’s even possible. It’s really over. Fuck. But at least I can put all my energy into Ali, our future, and my mom.
Sweat poured from his forehead, and tears flowed down his face. The loss hurt, and it was all on him. But the only thing that mattered, now that the anger was gone, was Ali. Was she okay? He needed to make the choice to man up and be there for her. Show her how much he cared for her.
Loud banging on the door startled him. Tyler’s voice bellowed through the door. “O’Conner, you’re up!”
* * * *
It took a melancholy interview with the media, being chewed out by Coach Walker, a nice long shower, and a quiet ride home before he was able to shake the loss. Walking into his loft, the first thing he did was detour to the kitchen, grab a beer and a slice of cold pizza. He sat down at the table and dialed Ali’s number.
SHOOTOUT SAVE (The Renegades Series Book 6) Page 14