by A. Cramton
He smirks. “Well my last name kind of gives it away, but I’m Dominican, and no I don’t speak Spanish, my mom never taught us.”
“You have siblings?” I raise up on my elbow.
He nods. “I have a little sister named Yasmine, she’s a freshman in college.”
I frown. “I’m the only child.”
Yoel plays with my hair mindlessly as we talk about our childhood and dislikes. He ask about my silly Knock Knock jokes, I tell him how I have the worst sense of humor and those jokes always get me.
I know getting to know him is just making me like him more, I was playing with fire after I already got burned, but I couldn’t make myself leave.
“You should follow your dreams, baby doll,” he randomly says.
I glance away then back at him. “It’s complicated, I can’t leave when I have responsibilities here.”
His eyebrows bunch together in confusion. “You mean staying with someone who doesn’t care about you is your responsibility?”
I sigh. “I told you it’s complicated. Marcus comes from a good family and my parents approve of him.”
“They set you up with him you mean. I bet they would die if they knew I had you in my bed. I’m not from a good family. I don’t come from much.”
I lean in a kiss him softly on the mouth. “I don’t care where you came from, Yoel. I just care about how you make me feel,” I whisper.
He kisses me back. “And how do I make you feel?” He moves between my legs. His fingers sliding over my clit, moving in circles. I moan.
“Tell me how I make you feel.” His hooded brown eyes stare me.
Licking my lips I take a breath as I feel him at my entrance. “You make me feel wanted.”
He leans over to kiss me as he slides inside of me. “You should always feel wanted, baby doll. You’re perfect.”
We made love. I shouldn’t say that, but we did, even if we both didn’t want to admit that what we were feeling was wrong. So wrong, but it felt too good to stop.
I was falling. Fast
Come With Me- Sammie
I lied to her.
I looked her in her pretty grey eyes and fucking lied to her. Again. I wanted to tell her the truth so bad, but I was selfish and couldn’t risk losing her for good. Yeah, I was a selfish, greedy bastard.
Still I took her back to my room and fucked her senseless. I sat there and told her to follow her fucking dreams and I almost broke when she told me I made her feel wanted. I made her feel something she deserves to feel every fucking day.
You’re going to break her.
If she ever found out the truth, I would definitely lose her. This wasn’t supposed to happen. I wasn’t supposed to fall for her pretty eyes, perfect mouth and addicting personality.
That prick didn’t deserve her.
And you do?
I know for damn sure I don’t deserve her, but I find myself trying to be the one that does.
This morning I was up before she was so that I could run to Starbucks to get the coffee and muffin she loves. I’m sure she thinks I don’t remember these things, but I do.
When she left to go home I felt annoyed that she was going back to the home she shared with that asshole.
A hit to my face breaks my thoughts as I stumble to the left.
“What the fuck? Pay attention.” Chris grabs my arm. “Where’s your head at?”
I give my head a quick shake. “Relax. Let’s go.”
Rico and Chris share a look. I know what they’re thinking, and they might be right. I need to leave my thoughts about Madison out of the ring. My focus needs to be on training.
“El, man,” Chris starts.
I cut him off. “I’m good.”
He huffs out a breath but doesn’t say anything. We go a couple more rounds, this time I knock him on his ass every time, just to shut them the fuck up. This fight means everything to my family and me, I had to remember that.
Knowing that I wouldn’t be seeing Madison tonight I headed to a bar and grill with Chris and Rico. We haven’t really spent much time together since I was either spending my nights with my Madison or moping around missing her. We were in a good place since last night. Last night I made love to her, it wasn’t intentional, it just happened and I don’t regret it.
“So how you feeling, kid?” Rico asks when were seated.
I quickly scan the menu, knowing I’ll probably get chicken and veggies.
“I feel good.”
He nods. “We still have a little over two months.” He pauses and looks at Chris then back at me. “Listen, you need to focus, you’ve been spacing out a couple of times. Remember why you’re here.”
My hands grip the edge of the table. “I am focused,” I snap. “You think I forgot?”
“Calm down, El. No one is saying that.” Chris says gently. “We’re just concerned since you have been seeing-“
“That broad,” Rico finishes.
Heat rises in my body and my hands clench into fists. “Her name is fuckin Madison.”
Rico sits back, his eyebrows up to his hairline. “Wow, you’re really going to hit me?” His eyes flicker to my fist.
Fuck. I was losing it. Releasing my fist I take a deep breath. “Look, don’t worry about Madison, and don’t worry about me. I’m good and I know why I’m here. I bust my ass for a shot at the belt. I won’t blow it.”
I could tell they still weren’t convinced, but I didn’t give shit. I knew what was on the line and it was more than my heart.
Being alone sucked. Usually I would find a willing chick to warm my bed, but for the last month it has only been one person. For some reason bringing another girl up here felt like cheating, but technically it’s not since we aren’t an actual couple.
Instead of going hunting at the downstairs bar I busied myself with push ups and sit-ups. After forty-five minutes I pulled out my laptop and settled on the bed. Netflix has become my source of entertainment, and Supernatural was my addiction. Well, it was our addiction. We both have the same taste in shows.
My phone beeps next to me.
I smile when I see who it is.
Babydoll: What are you doing?
Me: Watching Supernatural.
Babydoll: You weren’t supposed to watch it without me!
Oops. I forgot this show was our show to watch together.
Me: I’m watching it from the beginning relax.
I lie.
Babydoll: I miss you.
My heart races. She misses me?
Me: Miss you too, babe
Babydoll: See you tomorrow?
Me: Definitely
I toss my phone on the nightstand. Tomorrow couldn’t come fast enough. Until then it was just Dean, Sam and I.
Florida Kilos- Lana Del Rey
“What about this one?” I hold up a sleeveless blush cocktail dress against me.
Chelsea smiles. “Yes, even though I’m not sure why you’re even buying a dress for this party.”
I hand the dress to the store assistant who is already holding five other dresses.
“I told you, Marcus said it’s a promotion party, which means you know who will be there.” I start looking through another rack.
She rolls her eyes. “Your lover.” Chelsea sighs. “Madi, do you think it’s a good idea to go. It’s risky.”
It is risky to be in the same room with both of them. I still had a week to figure it out. I’ll just give Yoel a heads up. He’s been focused on his training since I saw him the other night. He lied about not watching Supernatural without me.
“I know, but Marcus is adamant that I’m there and I don’t feel like hearing my parents’ mouth.”
She takes a sip of her champagne. “You don’t find this a little fucked up. I mean don’t get me wrong, I hate Marcus, but what are you doing with Yoel?”
I look up at her. “I don’t know,” I honestly tell her. “I just love the way he makes me feel. After the fight he’ll be gone and I’m back to how I was b
efore. Alone.” My mouth turns into a frown. I would be alone all over again.
Sympathy fills her eyes. “I just don’t want to see you get hurt. “
“Do you know something that I don’t?”
She starts to say something but shuts her mouth and shakes her head no.
Chelsea doesn’t bring it up again while I try on dresses. I end up going with the blush cocktail dress.
An hour later I’m walking through the front door and frown. Marcus must be home. His gym bag is in the middle of the hallway and sneakers tossed to the side. I usually pick them up, but today I sidestep them.
I walk into the bedroom right as he is walking out of the bathroom with a towel around his narrow hips.
“Hey, you get a dress for next week?” he casually asks.
I nod. “I did.”
Marcus is a gorgeous man, I couldn’t deny that, but his personality made him ugly in my eyes. I could see why all these girls drop at his feet, he has an amazing body and from the few times we actually had sex, he wasn’t bad. He’s not better than Yoel, that’s for damn sure, but I shouldn’t be comparing.
I go still when I feel his hand grip my waist from behind. He rarely touches me.
“I was thinking we could hang out tonight. Order some Chinese and watch a movie.”
I turn to face him, my face showing my confusion. “You want to hang out with me?” I ask slowly.
He nods, “Yeah, I haven’t been home a lot and just thought we could hang out. It’s not a big deal, Madison.”
Now I feel bad for even questioning him. I planned on spending my evening with Yoel, but I couldn’t do that with Marcus home for the night.
I force a smile. “Of course, I’ll call it in.” I move out of his hold to hang up my dress and then walk out to the kitchen to call the restaurant.
I quickly send Yoel a text.
Me: Hey I can’t make it tonight. Sorry.
Not a second later my phone pings.
Yoel: You know I hate being alone
Me: I’m sorry, but I can’t get away tonight.
Yoel: I guess I understand, I’ll talk to you later.
He guesses he understands? Is he mad? He knows I’m with Marcus. Things are getting complicated now.
I finish ordering the food just as Marcus walks in with just a pair of joggers on. Once upon a time I used to love the sight of him bare chested, you know, back when I was blind to his cheating ways. Now I would give anything to be seeing Yoel bare chested.
After changing into my sleep shorts and tank, I tie my hair into a messy bun and join Marcus on the couch where he has the food spread out on the coffee table. We haven’t done this since we first started dating.
“Thanks for ordering the beef and broccoli.” He digs into the carton.
“It’s your favorite,” I automatically reply.
Marcus stares at me then looks at the T.V. “Do you want to pick the movie?”
Picking up the remote I put on Netflix and press on the first movie I see. The Gunman, it is.
We watch the movie in silence mostly, making small talk every so often.
Marcus clears his throat. “So have you been planning the wedding?”
Wedding? He barely acknowledges that we’re engaged.
“Um, no.” Confusion laces my voice. My stomach drops just thinking about planning it.
“Well I talked to our moms this morning,” he says and suddenly it all makes sense. Marcus never wants to hang out with me. He wanted me to get our moms off his back about the wedding.
I fight the urge to roll my eyes at this. “Well, we haven’t actually talked about it Marcus. You’re never home.”
“And neither are you,” he throws back.
I don’t reply back because I’m shocked by his statement. I’m shocked he even noticed.
“Well would you rather I stay home alone?” I say waving him off. “I’m with Chelsea most of the time. Who are you with?” I smirk.
He narrows his eyes at me about to say something, but his phone chimes and he pulls his eyes away from me to look at the screen. Marcus types quickly then stands up.
“Well thanks for dinner, I have to run. So-“
“Don’t stay up late.” I roll my eyes finishing for him.
He huffs. “Yeah, just start planning the wedding so we can get this over with.”
My eyes don’t leave the screen, and when he realizes that I’m not going to reply he walks off to our bedroom.
I can’t believe the nerve of him. Fucking prick. He only thinks about himself.
Instead of texting Yoel, who I’m sure is mad at me, I pull out my laptop and log into my emails.
Scrolling through the multiple job offers, I take a deep breath.
Why does life have to be so complicated.
Love Remix Ft. J Cole- Drake
I swish the ice cubes in my glass of whiskey. I don’t normally drink when I’m training, but I need this. Madison is asleep in my bed while I’m in the main room staring out into the Vegas night sky. She surprised me about an hour and a half ago. My guess is that she ended up alone but I didn’t ask. I was too busy getting her out of her clothes and devouring her body.
I keep racking my mind trying to figure out what exactly I’m doing with her. The feelings that plague my heart shouldn’t be there, she shouldn’t still be coming to my bed every other night. We shouldn’t be having dinner and talking about our days like we’re a fucking couple.
Madison mentioned that she would be at the promo party in a few days. I’m sure she was watching my reaction but I gave nothing away. Honestly I don’t know how I’m going to handle seeing her on Marcus’s arm. I couldn’t decide if I should bring a date or not.
Why not? She’s going to be with her fiancé.
I curse and sip my whiskey. This was going to be hell, absolute hell. If I could I wouldn’t show up, but it was part of the contract.
I need a date. It’s final. I couldn’t show up alone while he showed up with her.
Sliding my phone out of my sweats I scroll until I find the name I’m looking for and send her a quick text. I know it’s past midnight, but I’m sure she’s up.
My phone chimes and I almost laugh at her response. At least I had a date so I wouldn’t look like a loser.
“Hey, what are you doing out here?”
Slipping my phone into my pocket I turn to see a sleepy Madison, her hair is everywhere and my t-shirt she is wearing barely reaches her knees.
Her eyes narrow in on the glass in my hand. “Are you drinking?”
Shrugging I set the glass on the glass table next to me. “Not really. Go back to bed. I’ll be there in a minute.”
“Is everything okay?”
“Yes.” No.
Madison bites her lip, but nods walking back into the room.
I couldn’t tell her I was falling for her. I was gone after the fight. Out of her life.
I spend my morning sparring with Chris and running miles on the treadmill, anything to keep my mind off seeing Madison tomorrow night at the party. I haven’t spoken to her. More like I have been avoiding her.
She knows I am, if the last ten texts didn’t tell me. I hated this, hated ignoring her, but I need to focus on training and not about what happens when I leave.
Or when she finds out the truth.
The thought of her finding out hurts more than leaving her in a couple of months. Rico told me this idea was crazy, he was right. Have you ever looked back on stupid decisions you have made and wonder why you didn’t punch yourself in the face? Well this is one of those times for me. I feel like a fucking idiot. When I thought this would backfire, I thought it in the sense that I would be caught before it even started, not with me falling for her. We were far past our base rules. We were very into each other’s lives.
“Bro, I think you should take a break, you ran six miles already,” Chris’s amused voice breaks my concentration.
He’s right, I have ran six miles. I pull the red string to t
op the machine and gulp down water.
He throws me a towel. “Are you bringing Madison to the party tomorrow?”
I glare at him. “You know damn well I’m not taking her.”
He looks at me confused for a moment until realization replaces it. I never told him who she was. Only Rico knew.
“El, man. Please tell me she isn’t that Madison.” Chris knew my plans; I just never got to the part of telling him I went through with them. He knew her name and I assumed that he put two and two together, but I guess he didn’t.
“Madison St. Cruix?” His eyes bug out. “The heavyweight champs girl. Are you crazy? Does she fucking know?”
“Yes she knows who I am.” I wipe the sweat off my face.
He studies me and I try to look everywhere but at him.
“Damn, El, she’s going to hate you if she finds out you have been using her in your fucked up game of fucking with Marcus.”
I know.
He follows me into the locker room when I walk away from him.
“El, what the fuck.” Is all I hear him say before I slam the door to the steam room in his face. I didn’t need him to judge me, I judge myself enough already.
This Love- Ellie Goulding
“Madison, are you listening to me?” My mother snaps into the phone.
We have been on the phone for what feels like hours going back and forth on a wedding date. A wedding that I dreaded even thinking about, let alone actually go through with planning it.
I rub my temples. “Yes, I told you that I would have to talk to Marcus.”
She makes a sound of disapproval, “and how is Marcus, is he training hard?”
Rolling my eyes I fill my fifth glass of wine this evening. “Yes he trains and yes he still rarely comes home so I honestly have no idea how he’s doing.”
“Your attending the promo party with him tomorrow, right?” She ignores me. “It’s been awhile since you two have been seen together. People are starting to talk.”
God forbid her circle of bitches start to talk about if I will tie the knot or not. They need a life.