I was honestly puzzled. “Not to be contrary, but wouldn’t any female of your line do?”
“It’s uncommon for a male to be heir above a female,” he admitted. “Pascale is the rightful heir, but her spinnerets are underdeveloped. She barely spins silk and produces no hormone whatsoever.”
“I don’t—I can’t…” I tried wrapping my head around what he was saying. Our child. His heir.
“In the event Lourdes and I are ever compromised,” he said, “Maisy will ascend to rule.”
Legs wobbling, I leaned against the bars for support. I clawed at my shirt, its collar choking me. I couldn’t breathe. My knees buckled, and I hit the ground gasping. Dark splotches blinked in and out of my vision. I was babbling by the time Armand popped the lock and rushed in to crouch before me.
“You can’t have her,” I gasped.
His arms came around me, pulling me against him. “I think we both know that isn’t true.”
I thrashed in his hold. “She’s all I have.”
“No, she isn’t.” His arms tightened. “You have me.”
I got an arm loose and punched him. “You presumptuous bastard. You think that’s all it takes?”
Working his jaw, he winced. “You’re stronger than I remember.”
I shook my hand to lessen the sting. “Things change.”
“Ten years is a long time.”
I huffed the hair from my eyes. “Sometimes it’s not long enough.”
“I missed you,” he said through a tight voice. “Every day. For years.”
“I could tell by the way you approached me that first night. So gallant, holding the covers open so I could slide right into your bed.” I glared. “Try again.”
“I stopped seeing you in every female’s face the night I read the letter from your mother, telling me you had died of shame.” He sat beside me, tucking me under his arm. “I believed her. I see now I was a fool.” His voice lowered. “I never even looked. I let the most important thing in my life go and didn’t put up a fight. I was young. I was a coward. But I loved you more than I have ever loved another.” He scoffed. “The female I was betrothed to? She left the nest. I don’t know when. All I know is her father petitioned Lourdes for the right to break our betrothal, and she fought it until the girl’s family threatened to leave Erania and take four of our best spinners—her brothers—with them. When I heard, I begged Lourdes to set the girl free. She didn’t want me any more than I wanted her.”
“Lourdes just let her go?” I had trouble believing she would break an alliance so readily.
“She was newly wed, and I was desperate.” He leaned his head back. “She pitied me, knowing I would never have what she has with Rhys—a love match, a soul match—and she gave me a handful of years to pick my own bride from the females whose families were most likely to give me an heir.”
“After all this—” I had to ask, “—you want our daughter forced into the same role as you were?”
“Maisy is female. She produces the hormone herself.” He squeezed my arm. “She will be free to marry who she wants. Well, within reason. But she will have a choice. She can follow her own heart.”
“But her silk—it’s not unbreakable. I would have noticed when she went through a phase trying to restring her first cello with her silk.” I remembered her disappointment when she failed so clearly.
“You took after your mother, and Maisy took after you.” He lifted my hand, running his fingers over the spinnerets in the tips. “Her silk can’t be used, it would compromise the integrity of the piece she contributed to, but that’s a godsend. She won’t be required to work in the spinning rooms. She’ll be allowed to continue her studies. Maisy can learn from the best teachers. She’ll want for nothing.”
“I won’t make that decision for her.” It wasn’t fair to her to steal the choice from her.
“She’s a child,” he said firmly. “She can’t—”
“Maisy had to grow up fast,” I said just as firm. “Don’t discount her wishes because of her age.”
His sigh ruffled my hair. “If she’s half as stubborn as you are...”
“Her little finger is twice as stubborn as I am.” And he would soon be wrapped around it.
“A little girl.” He laced his fingers with mine. “Thank you.”
I glanced up at him. “You’re welcome.”
His proud smile gave my heart the sweetest ache.
He rose with a grunt when the tumblers began catching. I thought he intended to leave me there, but he reached down a hand instead. “Do you want her to see you behind bars?” He tugged me onto my feet and used that hand to draw me into him. He braced his forehead to mine. “We need to talk.”
I stared at his lips, remembering how they tasted. “We did talk.”
His finger traced the neckline of my shirt. “May I visit you tonight?”
I wrinkled my nose at my cell in the bastille. “It’s really only meant to hold one.”
Lowering his mouth, he let his breath feather hot over my skin. “Stubborn.”
“If I’m still here tonight, stay with Maisy.” I patted his cheek. “Don’t breathe new life into old ghosts.”
His lips brushed mine. “I’ll see you later.”
Lifting a hand to my mouth, I battled the surge of hope rising in my chest.
I knew better than to trust in Armand’s predictions. This wasn’t the first time he’d left me with a promise sweet on my tongue only to have the taste turn bitter when his best intentions burned to ash.
He exited as Lourdes entered. They exchanged quiet words that left me straining my ears.
A wide palm grasped the door leading into the bastille and pushed it open, the better for Paladin Rhys to glower at me. His other hand gripped the hilt of his sword. A blind female couldn’t miss the murder in his gaze. However well the maven might be taking news of my botched attempt to rid her of a sibling, her husband’s every line held suspicion. Given Lourdes’s family’s too recent tragedy, he was right to be worried. Lourdes noticed her husband’s glaring and patted his arm.
Armand glanced at me, brow puckered, but he left, pulling the door closed behind him.
Lourdes studied me from my bare feet to my uncombed hair. “It’s been a long time, Astrid.”
I didn’t correct her. I stood there and let her look her fill.
“Did you know who I was when you told me Armand went to his room alone?”
A slight grin curved her lips. “I suspected you weren’t who you said you were.”
I wasn’t sure how much I trusted her smile. “What gave me away?”
“Nothing you did.” She inclined her head. “Your disguise was convincing.”
I started to cross my arms, but when Rhys tensed, I lowered them. “Then what?”
She cut him a glare he dismissed, then turned back to me. “When Armand saw you, he jerked upright as if a master puppeteer had yanked his strings.”
I scoffed. “How is that different than his response to any scantily clad female?”
“Armand uses social events as an excuse to drink until his eyes are floating, and then he beds the nearest female. It’s a pattern I don’t approve of, but one I have grown accustomed to. So imagine my surprise when he stopped shy of being utterly sloshed the night of my anniversary celebration and then stumbled to his room alone.” She cast Rhys a look from beneath her lashes. “I might have let my husband tempt me into forgetting about Armand’s behavior altogether, but I—”
“—you are far too clever for that,” he finished with a slow grin.
She hushed him with a gentle shove and approached me.
“When I saw Armand escorting Maisy, I noticed the resemblance immediately. We all inherited the shape of our mother’s face.” Her tone softened. “In that regard, Maisy could pass for Pascale at that age.”
At last her interest began making sense. “You thought I brought Maisy here to ask Armand for gold.”
“Something like that,” she agreed.
“Living the way he was, I had accepted that one day a female might bring us a child of his. Maisy’s age would have put your liaison with Armand around the time he lost you, the time when he was lashing out hardest.”
The thought curdled my gut. “What changed your mind?”
“A female who wanted back into Armand’s life and access to his fortune wouldn’t have played as hard to get as you did. Besides the fact Maisy is such a sweet girl, and so transparent. She had no idea who he was or what you were doing here. If you had truly wanted to use her as leverage, you would have trained her about what to say and do to get into his good graces or to earn his pity.” She lifted her hand as I opened my mouth. “Don’t give me that look. It happens more often than you would imagine. The fact I would never turn a child of our line away makes me soft-hearted, not soft-headed.”
“I’ll grant you that.” I knew that was true. Where there was wealth, there were those who coveted it.
“Then you’ll also allow that it made good sense for me to suspect you were one of his females.” She exhaled softly. “But only one had ever made him lose all his sense, and that was Astrid—you.”
I wasn’t sure if she meant that as a compliment or not, but I took it as one. “I wish we were meeting again under better circumstances.”
She folded her arms. “Circumstances are of our own making.”
“Yes, they are.” I mirrored her pose. “We all make choices for survival we may come to regret.”
One blonde eyebrow rose. “Do you regret what you’ve done?”
“Do I regret protecting my daughter?” I shook my head. “No. I don’t.”
Her lips quirked. “Do you understand the ramifications of what Armand wants for Maisy?”
It was hard to say it. “To name her his heir.”
“How do you feel about that?” she asked, as though my turning green hadn’t made it obvious.
“There is no love lost between your family and me. I worry that stigma would wash onto Maisy over time.” My chest tightened. “I worry for such a young girl to be given such great responsibility.”
Lourdes smiled then. “I think I managed well enough.”
I wanted to agree with her, but it wasn’t the same. “You were trained from birth to rule.”
She inclined her head, conceding the point. “She was trained from birth to survive.”
Fierce pride expanded my chest. “She’s so much braver than she ever should have had to be.”
“Trials we endure as children are what forge us as adults.” She approached me, putting her hand on my arm. “Before we break down to the matter of my niece’s station, we must first discuss yours.”
I blinked at her. “I came for your sister.”
“That is an admission of treason,” Rhys rumbled behind her.
“For it to be treason, I would have to belong to your clan.” I scoffed. “And I don’t.”
“You were born here. You grew up here. Your child is of this family,” he persisted.
“You’re right. So when I say that I was exiled as little more than a child from the only home I’d ever known, by your wife’s loving family, I’m sure you understand why I don’t hold them as high in my esteem as you seem to.” Blood rushed in my ears. “Maisy’s is the life I most cherish. Not theirs.”
Lourdes’s hand slid to my elbow. “Not even Armand’s?”
“The girl who loved him died.” I shrugged her off me. “I’m not the same person I was then.”
“I know.” Her voice gentled. “That girl was treated cruelly, though it was by necessity. I played a part in your exile. I can’t undo the choices I made, and I wouldn’t if I could. You were right when you said I was born to rule.” Her gaze sought out Rhys’s. “Until recently, that was all I knew.”
The stark love for her in his eyes made me wish I had never followed her line of sight. It hurt to see that kind of love, to remember how it felt, that it existed, that I no longer had it.
Focusing at the wall behind their heads, I steadied my nerves. “What will you do to me?”
“If she had any sense,” Rhys muttered, “she would have you executed along with the others.”
“Others?” I stilled. “You caught them?”
“You sound surprised.” Rhys bared his teeth. “Why is that?”
“Armand told me he spoke with one of the males,” I said, “but that he implicated me.”
“He did.” Rhys’s fangs distended. “When Armand brought him to Lourdes to hear his concerns, the bastard tried to dart her with gods only knows what.” With no small amount of satisfaction in his voice, Rhys informed me, “I persuaded him to confess. He and his partner are in the west end awaiting trial.”
I frowned. “But you said I should be executed—”
“No one makes an attempt on Lourdes’s life and lives.” He cut me short. “No one.”
I clamped my mouth shut and eased one quiet step back.
“Stop trying to intimidate her.” Lourdes gave him a stern look. “Either behave or wait outside.”
“This is me behaving,” he snarled. “I won’t leave you alone with an assassin, even a poor one.”
Lourdes turned her back on him so she could fully face me. “We decided—”
He scowled at me as if the cold shoulder she had given him was my fault. “She decided—”
“—that in light of their full confession, you will be released into a council member’s custody until further notice.” When I gaped at her, Lourdes gave me a sympathetic pat. “Colleen sent assassins for me. You, she sent on a wild-goose chase.” Her lips compressed. “This is confirmation she knows my sister is no longer in Erania. Given your history with Armand, she no doubt hoped you would create a scandal, giving the real assassins time to complete their mission and escape with no one the wiser.”
I shook my head to clear it. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Don’t thank me yet.” Lourdes chuckled. “I didn’t say which council member is your guardian.”
I groaned his name. “Armand.”
Her amusement waned. “He’s sworn his life for yours.” At my gasp, she added, “It was the only reason the council permitted you to remain here. You must swear fealty to me, and if you break your vow, you will both pay for the offense with your lives and Maisy will grow up without her parents.”
My heart beat faster. “He had no right to do that.”
“He disagrees.”
“He was foolish.”
“Be that as it may, what’s done is done.” She strode to Rhys’s side. “We really should be going. You have another visitor who’s anxious to see you. Just…keep in mind if the Araneidae are to claim Maisy, we need to act quickly to ensure she’s well-protected before news of her new relation leaks.”
“After I’ve spoken with her, I’ll let you know.”
Lourdes nodded, frowning when she noticed her husband’s preoccupation with me.
Rhys shot her a grin meant to reassure, then strolled over, fitting his wide palm across my throat, and squeezed just hard enough my breath caught. “Second chances are rare. Thirds don’t exist.”
“Rhys.” Lourdes sighed his name.
“I understand,” I choked out, fighting the urge to tear at his fingers.
“Good.” He released me. “I would regret killing you, eventually. I like your daughter.”
After they left, I stood rubbing my neck, debating whether Rhys liking Maisy was a good thing.
Chapter Six
After waiting what felt like hours, I decided Maisy was too furious or too hurt or both to see me. I wrapped my arms around myself to keep from shattering. Everything I had done since I left Erania had been to protect her. I never told her who her father was, and she never asked me. Not even once.
I had warred with myself all her life. To tell her, not tell her, to tell her, not…
Somewhere along the way, I decided I would give her his name when she came of age, when her skin was thicker, when his rejection wouldn�
�t sting as much, when she had the strength to endure what it required for my claim to be proven. Yet she had endured all that, all alone, while I was stuck in here.
When a small hand pressed into my back, I jumped.
“Momma?” an equally small voice asked.
I turned slowly, taking my cues from her. “Hi, baby.”
Fat tears filled her eyes, and she held her arms up to me as she had done when she was younger.
“I wanted to see you. Armand said I couldn’t. He said you were in a lot of trouble, so I told him it was my fault too.” She sobbed. “He wouldn’t believe me, but it is. You were just protecting me.”
Swinging her up in my arms, I smiled into her hair. “None of this is your fault. Not a drop of it.” With a grunt, I hitched her up higher so I could put my back to the wall and slide us to the floor. With her at eye level, I grasped her hands in mine and inhaled. “How much has Armand told you?”
“I heard him talking to Lourdes.” Her timid smile sent my heart tumbling. “Is it true?”
My head bobbed. It was the best answer I could manage with my throat so tight.
She glanced up at me through thick lashes. “Does that mean we’re going to stay here?”
I gave her hands a squeeze. “Do you want to?”
“It’s nice here. Lourdes and Armand are kind.” She bit her lip. “I like Rhys.”
I must have made a face, because she laughed.
“He calls me Little Princess Lost.” Her cheeks glowed.
I couldn’t help myself. I pinched one. “He does?”
She picked at the hem of my shirt. “Do you want to stay here?”
Thinking back on what Lourdes had said, I told her the truth. “I may not have much choice.”
Brightening, Maisy leaned close. “We have our own rooms. Each of us. They’re connected by a door, just like at home. We don’t have much now, but Armand said we could fill them with whatever we want. If we stay, I mean. We don’t have to. We could go home when they let you. If you want.”
A Kiss of Venom (An Araneae Nation Novella) Page 8