Maybe someday I’ll finally have a family, too.
“How far along are you? Are you feeling all right?”
“I’m doing just fine, and I expect the baby in about four months.”
“Oooh. ‘Four months,’ she says. That means you’re five along and haven’t told me. Shame on you! Oh, but it doesn’t matter, I’m that happy for you. Which pattern of flannel would you like?”
“The blue plaid, please.”
“You’ve already got an inkling that your babe will be a strapping boy, do you? Small wonder when your husband has five brothers. There you are. What else can I get you?”
Miriam turned to Alisa. “We earned about three dollars each, and I’ve spent mine. What would you like to spend your share on?”
“I brought back everything I needed from San Francisco, but it seems to me that Delilah did an awful lot of churning. You’ll need a good cape and skirt for the winter— it’s never too early to think about these things. I’d say we should get some good wool.”
“Wonderful idea. I thought the same thing.” Miriam laughed. “We’ll use most of the green gingham I’m buying for a work dress.”
“No. That’s your money. You should spend it on yourself, both of you.” Delilah didn’t want any handouts.
“ ‘The labourer is worthy of his hire,’ the Bible tells us. You’ve done a lot of work on the homestead, and you’ll need heavier clothing when it snows. Since the Lord blessed me with everything I need, I want you and Miriam to split it.” Alisa was rapidly becoming the most generous person Delilah had ever known. If she refused the gift, it would hurt Alisa’s feelings. Besides, they were telling her that they wanted her to stay through winter—that would mean a whole year here!
“All right.” Delilah gave in as graciously as she could. “What will I need?”
“I’d say three yards of the gray plaid with black and red shooting through it for a skirt and about four yards of black for a good warm cape. You’re tall but slender, so it will be enough,” Alisa decided.
“Wool’s the most expensive fabric for good reason. You’ll be nice and cozy in it,” Reba said with approval. “The seven yards comes to about two dollars’ worth. What else?”
Delilah looked to Miriam and Alisa. “I’d like a charcoal pencil for my drawing and a few packets of flower seeds to plant in front of the cabin, if that’s all right.”
“I’d forgotten you draw, Delilah. You’ll have to show me some of the pictures you’ve made when we get back,” Miriam exclaimed.
“What a wonderful idea! We’ve tried, but the place still seems more masculine than anything else. Some flowers would be welcome.” Alisa’s approval made Delilah decide on the spot she’d plant some in front of her new friend’s cabin the moment she got a chance. For now, she had a home—and they wanted her for a whole year. She might as well enjoy it while it lasted.
Chapter 6
Delilah stepped into the kitchen with four dozen eggs and a smile. She’d now been at Chance Ranch for an entire week—longer than at any residence she’d ever known. She’d come to look forward to waking up and joining Miriam and Alisa in the kitchen, where she’d learn how to make something new and delicious.
“Are we getting started on the baked apples?” She remembered promising Bryce his favorite treat.
“No. We’ll make those so we can have them right after lunch. Everybody gets one, so it wouldn’t be enough for breakfast.” Miriam placed a towel over a bowl of dough. “This morning we’ll make French toast.”
“For the Lord’s Day.” Alisa moved a stack of thick slices toward the stove.
“Oh.” Delilah felt the smile slide off her face. The Lord’s Day? For Papa, that was just a day to sleep off the effects of Saturday’s revelry since the saloons were closed, but she knew that wasn’t how most people behaved. When she was a little girl, Mama would read from the Bible or, if the town were big enough, take her to hear a preacher. The very thought of listening to someone expound on the idea of what a sinner she was for hours on end made Delilah’s stomach lurch.
“The rain’s wiped away any chance of anyone coming over for the service, so the men can relax a bit instead of setting up outside the barn.”
Miriam’s words lifted Delilah’s spirits. No preacher and a day of relaxation didn’t sound bad at all. Besides, at least for today, Paul wouldn’t have to feel bad about not being able to help his brothers until his arm healed.
“What can I do to help?” Time passed quickly as she got swept up in making breakfast. Mixing eggs with cinnamon and milk and then dipping bread into the mixture before frying it to a golden brown was much easier than she’d thought it would be, and soon the men began filtering through the door, noses twitching appreciatively.
After breakfast, everyone pitched in to clean up. The table was cleared and the dishes done in record time. Surveying the sparkling kitchen, Delilah wondered what the men would do all day. Her question was answered when Gideon brought in a worn Bible and settled to the right of his usual position at the head of the table. As though the action were an unspoken command, the rest of the family flocked to join him. Reluctant to join in for reasons too numerous to count, Delilah wondered whether there was any way to excuse herself. Obviously this was a family religious gathering. Since she didn’t believe as they did and couldn’t count herself as a member of the family, there was no place for her here.
She watched as Paul took the seat at the head of the table, waited until everyone else was situated, and beckoned for her to sit at his left. When she hesitated, Gideon shot a glance at Miriam, who rose from her seat, walked over, and took Delilah’s hand.
“Come on, it’s time for worship. It’s all right if you don’t know the words to the hymns Titus will lead us in. Gideon will be praying for our family and friends, and Paul has chosen the scripture for today.”
With that, any hope of wiggling out of the situation disappeared more quickly than the French toast had earlier. Pasting a smile on her face, Delilah slid onto the bench and bowed her head as Paul and Ginny Mae each held one of her hands. Clinging to the comfort of Paul’s warm, steady grasp, she blinked back tears at Gideon’s prayer.
“Lord, we come before you happy and whole and blessed beyond what we deserve. Right now, we know that across the world some people are not so fortunate. Please be with those who lost their homes and loved ones when Vesuvius burst open and rained fire upon the land. We know Thou art there, keeping watch over Thy children. Please help us never to lose sight of how blessed we are by Thy love. Amen.”
Titus asked if anyone had any particular hymn they’d like to sing.
“I’d love to sing ‘Holy, Holy, Holy,’ ” Alisa offered.
Delilah closed her eyes as everyone followed Titus’s deep baritone. Although she tried to ignore the lyrics, instead silently reciting recipes she’d learned or the kinds of flowers she’d plant in the garden, the lovely music broke through her thoughts. She didn’t want to listen because she didn’t agree with what was said.
How can they think that God is “merciful and mighty”? If He really exists, He took away Mama and didn’t help Papa overcome his weaknesses.
“Early in the morning, our song shall rise to Thee….” The words and melody were so lovely! Even Daniel’s scowl faded as Polly’s little voice piped in, trilling the words in slightly off-key exuberance.
After another song Delilah didn’t recognize, Paul started the lesson.
“Here we sit, surrounded by friends and family in a solid home on good land. These are only a few of the blessings God has bestowed upon us. But I’ve been thinking about Mama and Papa a lot lately, how proud they’d be to see how much our family has grown. They built the foundation on faith and love, and it has withstood hard times. But in chasing the past, we can easily lose track of all the wonder of the present”—his eyes met hers—“and the promise of the future.
“The Bible reading is about following the Lord wherever He sees fit to lead and giving thanks fo
r the blessings He provides, rather than looking back on things that are no more.”
The lump in her throat swelled at Paul’s words, and anger pulsed at her temples. Is he talking about me? It’s only right and natural to grieve when a loved one is lost! Taking a deep breath, she listened as Paul read about a city given over entirely to sin. Only one man in the entire city found favor with God. Well, she could easily believe that. After all, as far as she could see, God was mighty selective about the people He looked after. Mama prayed and read the Bible every day and did her best to be a good wife and mother. She begged for God to help Papa stop gambling and longed for the security of a home. Instead, she died in a strange town with no money to see a doctor. If Mama, whose heart held no selfishness, wasn’t good enough for God, there was precious little hope left for anyone else.
Paul read on. “ ‘And when the morning arose, then the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city….And it came to pass, when they had brought them forth abroad, that he said, Escape for thy life; look not behind thee….’ ”
Ah, so there’s the part where he was talking about not thinking on the past. Comforted that Paul hadn’t been pointing her out, she listened more carefully as he continued.
“ ‘Behold now, thy servant hath found grace in thy sight, and thou hast magnified thy mercy, which thou hast shewed unto me in saving my life….’ ”
Wait a minute. God saved Lot’s life from whom? From Himself? That doesn’t seem very benevolent. So He saves one man and destroys entire cities, and that is magnifying His mercy? Maybe there’s a turn in the middle, and He saves the cities to show His mercy! Delilah listened intently to the next verses.
“ ‘Then the LORD rained upon Sodom and upon Gomorrah brimstone and fire from the LORD out of heaven; and he overthrew those cities, and all the plain, and all the inhabitants of the cities, and that which grew upon the ground. But his wife looked back from behind him, and she became a pillar of salt.’ ”
Nope. He destroyed the cities. Even Lot couldn’t depend on God to protect his family. No, this God who smote entire cities and turned a woman into salt simply for watching can’t be the God of love, too. It just doesn’t fit. Where is the lesson here?
“So the lesson here”—Paul’s voice mimicked her thoughts almost exactly—“is stated by Christ Himself in Luke 17. This tale is specifically used by the Savior to remind us that we need to make Him the focus of our lives.
“ ‘Remember Lot’s wife. Whosoever shall seek to save his life shall lose it; and whosoever shall lose his life shall preserve it.’ ”
That makes no sense!
“Now this may seem to contradict itself,” Paul clarified, “but Jesus isn’t just talking about life as we know it, but eternal life, too. The only way to gain eternal life is by giving Christ this one.”
His words sent shivers up Delilah’s spine. How can I be asked to give my life to the control of someone when everyone I’ve depended on has let me down?
“Once we acknowledge God as the one who created us and give ourselves to Him, we will live forever in His grace. Let’s pray.”
Thoughts whirled through Delilah’s head as the family joined hands once more. How could anyone live forever? It just isn’t possible. She’d seen death in all its horrible finality—no one could escape the threat that came and stole all smiles and laughter and life.
Mama gave her life to Jesus. How can I trust Him when He took Mama away and didn’t save her? And how can I tell these people who believe in salvation they’re wrong when I don’t understand it? Why do they have the same peace and joy in God that Mama had? Delilah’s heart ached as the others sang another hymn she didn’t recognize. Why can’t I understand what they believe and be as happy as they are? What am I missing?
Her thoughts came to a halt as she recognized the melody everyone sang. As the words poured forth, Delilah remembered the hymn as one of her mother’s favorites. Despite her resolution not to take part, she mouthed the words:
“Blest be the tie that binds
Our hearts in Christian love…”
She snuck a glance at Paul, only to find him watching her. At his encouraging nod, she raised her voice and joined in:
“The fellowship of kindred minds
Is like to that above.”
Amid the deep voices of the brothers around her, Delilah could almost hear her mother’s clear soprano. By the third verse, she blinked back tears at the memory.
It was no use. God had abandoned her long ago, and there was no tie to bind her to these good people, no matter how much she wished for one. At least there was one thing she could take away from Paul’s lesson. She didn’t have to keep reliving the past and regretting what she couldn’t change. Instead, she’d focus on these people who opened their home and hearts to her. For now.
Paul smiled as he remembered the service that morning. His lovely little lady couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket, but somehow that added to her charm. After all, no one was perfect. And if he wasn’t mistaken, the Lord had begun answering his prayer about softening her heart to the truth. He’d watched her reaction to the hymns and the Bible reading and seen a woman lost in deep thought and longing. It was too much to think she’d already come completely to God, but the seed was planted. Thank You, Father.
“Hey! It’s your turn, Paul!” Titus called.
Logan waved a horseshoe as his brother walked across the barn.
“If I were you, I wouldn’t be so eager to lose first place,” Paul joked.
“What?” Logan joined in the good-natured ribbing. “I know you always said you could beat us with one hand tied behind your back, but I never thought to see it tested!”
Paul stifled a groan as he remembered his arrogant boast from last month. He hadn’t expected to have to prove it! Pulling his good arm back, he tossed the horseshoe at the spike, only opening his eyes when he heard a promising clang.
“Well, I’ll be.” Gideon laughed. “I reckon he was right after all. Don’t suppose you’d care to repeat that performance?”
“What, and lose my moment of victory?” Paul protested. “Nope. I think I’ll just stroll inside for some cool water and see how supper is coming along.” He headed for the house, ignoring the taunts aimed at him by his brothers about how he just didn’t think he could make that shot twice in a row.
Truthfully, he probably couldn’t. But he had a powerful thirst to quench. He opened the door to a mix of tantalizing smells.
“Need some water?” Miriam handed him a cupful.
“How’s supper coming along? Smells good enough in here to tempt the angels.”
“We just put the roast in the oven. The biscuits are rising and the apples are ready for baking, but we’ll put them in later so they don’t get cold.” Alisa smiled. “Did Titus put you up to throwing horseshoes regardless of your arm?”
Holding back a grin at how well Alisa knew her husband, Paul tried to think of an answer that wouldn’t get them both in trouble.
“Just one to defend my place. Besides, it’s not my throwing arm.”
“I warned you to take it easy!” Miriam chided, but she couldn’t hide the laughter in her tone. “You’d think first place in an ongoing horseshoes competition wouldn’t be as important as your health.”
“Are you all right?” Delilah gently adjusted his sling, her fingers brushing his forearm when she made sure his sleeve was still rolled up. He knew she meant to keep his sling as dry as possible in the rainy weather, but the heat following her touch succeeded more than she knew.
“Fine.” He turned to Polly to mask the gruffness of his voice. “What do you have there, baby girl?”
“Lilah’s going to teach me a game!” She held up a pack of cards.
“Cards?” He raised an eyebrow.
“I said it would be fine to have a hand of Old Maid,” Miriam cut in. “Would you like to join Delilah and Polly? I’m sure Polly woul
d love to have you on her team.”
“I got Unca Paul!” Polly crowed, then her face fell. “But who have you got, Lilah?”
He saw a flash of sadness cross Delilah’s face and knew she thought about her parents again. He stepped in. “Ginny Mae, of course. Come on and take a seat.”
Delilah had Ginny Mae on her lap and held the cards, taking out all the queens but one. She held up the remaining female face card. “All right, Polly. This is the Old Maid. Every other card has a match—fours go together, nines go together, and so on. You want to find a match to all of your cards, because the first one who does, wins. The Old Maid doesn’t have a match, though, so whoever has her in their hand at the end of the game loses, all right?”
“Okay. How do we get the matches?” Polly’s tiny brow furrowed in serious concentration as she dangled her feet off the edge of the bench.
“First, I’m going to split the cards.” Delilah dealt the hand. “Now you need to look at your deck with Uncle Paul and take out all the matches while Ginny Mae and I do the same thing.”
There was silence as Paul helped Polly match cards while Delilah’s partner helpfully stuck peas in the box with the extra queens and waved it in the air.
“I gotta question. What if we got three cards that are the same number? Like these?” Polly held up two sixes and a nine.
“Well, honey, that’s close, but not quite. Do you remember how Auntie Miriam’s been teaching you numbers? Well, you haven’t gotten to these yet, but a six looks like an upside-down nine. See?” He turned the cards for her inspection.
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