by Dizzy Girl
“No problem” I said, “where will you be going?”
“To one of the big stores in Westfield to start with, we thought they’d have a lot of choice to try a few bits on and go from there.”
“How about you do that, and I’ll head over to meet you in a couple of hours. We could go for a late lunch at one of the cafes outside maybe?”
“Good idea,” said Sunny, picking up my cup and taking a swig of coffee.
“Did you sleep enough?” I asked him as I watched him yawn again.
“I’d have liked a couple more hours, but it’s so bright out it is hard to sleep properly. Especially now I’m up.”
“How long do you have before you meet Mark?”
“An hour, in fact, I’d better get a move on.”
“Want me to help you shower?” I asked, smiling at him.
“That would be perfect” he replied, “in fact, I’m sure if I texted Mark I could put him back a little while.”
In the event, Sunny was so late going out to meet Mark that we arranged to meet for dinner, instead of lunch, but we were both relaxed and cheerful. We took a train to the shopping centre, and I left Sunny wandering off in the direction of the suit shop, and I decided on a nice slow mooch around the shoe shops. No matter how tiny and tidy Sunny’s flat was, there would always be room for just one more pair.
A couple of hours, and a very fabulous pair of shoes later, I was sat in the restaurant, sipping a glass of wine and looking at the menu. An hour after that and I had eaten, by myself, and was feeling somewhat less than relaxed. The good thing about having a boyfriend who is very attentive to detail, is that he is rarely late. The good thing about having a boyfriend who is a police officer is that he’s used to being contactable anytime and usually answers his phone. Today, though, Sunny was doing neither. I’d tried Mark’s for good measure, but no answer on either.
I took the train home, getting more and more cross as time passed, with still not even a text message from either of them. The lazy Saturday we’d planned to spend together had gone, and instead I found myself curled up on the sofa watching repeats of not very funny sit coms on the TV.
I think I must have fallen asleep, because I jumped when the front door crashed open. Mark walked in, with Sunny draped across his shoulders. I barely moved my legs in time before he dropped Sunny onto the sofa, and curled himself up in a ball on the floor. As much as I wanted to shout at them both, I decided to wait until morning. It would be much better revenge if I waited until the hangover kicked in.
Sure enough, as I walked round the flat in the morning, having had a great night’s sleep all by myself in the big bed, opening the curtains and letting sunshine flood the room, I heard moans of protest coming from the floor. Although, that could also have been because I wasn’t very careful about looking what, or who, I stepped on. I put some loud music on and started banging cupboard doors open in the kitchen as I made myself some breakfast, choosing to cook the most pungent things I could think of.
Mark walked into the kitchen, pulled a chair out from the table, sat down, put his head on his hands and went back to sleep. I could hear Sunny sounding rather unwell in the bathroom, so I turned the music up louder and made a pot of strong coffee. After waking Mark up and forcing him to take a couple of painkillers and drink a pint of water, I heard the shower running, and a few minutes later Sunny came in, looking rather delicate still.
“Sorry about last night” Sunny said. “I just got your texts. I didn’t mean to miss dinner.”
“It wasn’t his fault” Mark chipped in, “he was looking after me. None of the clothes suited me, the hats barely fit over my hair. The guy in the shop was so stuck up and snobby. And I don’t want to let Charlie down, I want her to have an amazing day. I have one job to do, to get my clothes, and I couldn’t even do that.”
“So I took him for a quick pint, to cheer up” said Sunny, picking up the tale, “only I’d hardly slept, and so it hit me a bit quicker than I thought.”
“You are a bit of a light weight even at the best of times” I told him. I was starting to find this funny, seeing how awful they both felt today, but I wasn’t ready to let them off the hook just yet.
“It’s not my fault”, Sunny protested. “When you guys drank beer for hundreds of years, the Chinese drank tea. I’m not designed to tolerate alcohol well.”
“Sunny was too drunk to tell me that he was supposed to meet you or I’d have got him there” Mark apologised.
“I’m not sure having him there pissed out of his head would have been too much fun anyway” I said. “And what about your phones? I did try and ring you.”
They shook their heads, and Mark winced at the action. “It was noisy, there was a football game on, West Ham were playing. We didn’t hear a thing til we got out then we saw what time it was and came straight home.”
“Sorry I missed dinner,” Sunny said.
“It’s ok” I said. “I’ve got bacon and eggs here.” Sunny began to look green. “Toast, mushrooms, maybe a few tomatoes?” I asked.
Sunny got up to run to the loo and Mark and I both found ourselves laughing. It is hard to stay cross with someone who looks so poorly after all.
Chapter Sixteen
So Saturday passed without us having chance to talk, and Sunday was fast going the same way. Mark disappeared off home after breakfast to have a chat with Charlie and re think his clothing options for the wedding. He seemed to expect that as long as he didn’t turn up in jeans she wouldn’t mind. I wasn’t so sure but didn’t have the heart to burst his bubble.
Sunny went back to bed and didn’t emerge again for another six hours. He probably needed it though, he was still catching up after a week of late shifts, and so I left him to sleep. I spent a few hours at home with my parents, sitting in the garden, and trying to avoid any well- intentioned but hard to answer questions about my living situation.
I decided to cook Sunny his favourite tea for when he woke up, so I stopped at the shops on the way, letting myself back into his flat with two bulging carrier bags. I tried to go in quietly, just in case he was still feeling rough, but there was no need. He was awake and sat in the kitchen. He still didn’t look very happy, but that might have had more to do with his company. Sat facing him, with a ram rod straight spine and a stern expression on her face, was his mum, Pamela.
Sunny didn’t talk about his mum often. His dad had been such a powerful and dominant figure in his life that his mum seemed to fade into the background by comparison. Here she was though, no longer several thousand miles away. She turned to stare and I didn’t need to ask if she recognised me. I felt my heart start to hammer in my chest, and had to remind myself that I was no longer a scared sixteen year old. I looked at Sunny, trying to read his expression. I knew he loved his mum, but right now all I could see was anger. I turned to leave again, thinking I’d give them a while to talk. I got as far as the bedroom before Sunny caught up with me.
“Are you ok?” I asked him.
He reached out and pulled me into a hug. He held me, kissing my hair and holding me close, but he didn’t speak straight away. Eventually he took a deep breath, letting it out with a slow sigh.
“I don’t know. My granddad died. Mum came home to tell me. He looked after me for five years after Dad kicked me out. I feel like I’ve been punched in the stomach. I didn’t realise how much I missed him and now he’s gone. ”
“I never asked you how close you were to him.” I said. “I didn’t think to, I knew you were angry about leaving. It never occurred to me to think about how nice it must have been to have time to get to know your granddad when you were there.”
“It really was” Sunny replied. “Especially as I got more fluent and could get his humour more. He was so different to my dad. He was so laid back for a start.”
“I guess he never moved half way round the world and tried to look after his family on his own.” I said, with no idea why I was trying to stick up for a man who had caused us so much
hurt. “How long is your mum staying?”
“I don’t know that yet either. She arrived about half an hour ago. I haven’t seen her since my dad died. I don’t know if I’m happy to see her or angry about how she and my dad treated us. He was such a forceful man, and yet, when he died she moved straight back and didn’t even stop long enough to see me. You know, all those years I was out there I didn’t speak to her at all.”
I stroked his hair. “Shall I stay or head back to my parents for the night? It sounds like you two have an awful lot to talk about.”
“I’d like you to stay, but I think things might get a little loud” Sunny said.
I picked up a bag and started to pack some clothes. I kissed him, and walked back to my parents house. It was a strange feeling, as I let myself back in, this being in-between homes. My dad looked up in surprise as he saw me.
“Are you alright love? He asked. “Have you had a fight?”
“No, Dad” I said. “We’re fine, but Sunny’s mum just turned up. I thought I’d better give them some space. He hasn’t seen her in years. They’ve got a lot to talk through.”
Mum walked into the room, she had a glass of wine in her hand. She handed it to me and went back to get herself another one.
“I never understood what she saw in his dad you know” she said, coming back in and sitting down.
“Sandra”, Dad protested.
“It’s true. We knew them when they first moved here, Pamela was so sweet. She used to look after some of the older Chinese ladies locally. She’d bring them into the health centre and help translate for them. Maybe it was living with that bastard that ground her down, but those last few years when you were away, she’d walk past me in the street and pretend not to see me.” Just like her husband.
I could only wonder about how much Sunny’s dad had told her. Did she know why he’d sent Sunny away? Did she agree with him? Did she know what I’d chosen to do?
I sipped my wine. “I don’t think Sunny was altogether happy to see her. I said I’d come home for the night and give them space to talk, but I wouldn’t be surprised if you can hear the shouting from here.”
I drank my wine and went to bed. I checked my mobile before going to sleep. There was a message from Sunny. It read simply “sleep well, miss you babe,” but no word about how his reunion had gone.
I missed going to sleep with him, there’s no feeling like going to sleep wrapped in your partner’s arms, chatting together in the dark, making sense of the day and making plans for the future. And if you’re lucky making love until you’re sleepy and cosy. Instead I had to be satisfied with texting back “Love you sweet man. Hug you soon.”
Chapter Seventeen
Monday morning started all too early. At least waking up at home had one benefit, I went downstairs to find a pot of coffee already made and poured myself a big cup. Mum walked in and kissed my cheek. She grabbed a coffee too, had a few quick mouthfuls, grabbed a croissant, kissed me on the head one final time and was gone to work in a whirlwind of perfume and paperwork.
As tempting as it was to stay home, budget spreadsheets wait for no one, so I got dressed and dragged myself into work. It was more interesting than it sounded, I’d got some project proposals in from groups I’d been working with and it was exciting to go through their plans and work out what we could fund. I was actually surprised to look up and notice that it was lunchtime.
I was planning to just grab a quick sandwich and carry on, but as I walked up the high street I heard my name being called. I turned to see Sunny, running up the road towards me, thankfully on his own.
“How’s your mum doing?” I asked, after we’d kissed.
“She’s jetlagged, a bit upside down. Really upset about my granddad passing away. I don’t think she knows what to do with herself. She was talking about whether to move back, she doesn’t even know what country she wants to live in right now.”
“Is she going to be staying with you for a bit then?” I asked.
Sunny shrugged. “I don’t know, I don’t have a spare room, so she’s in my bed and I’m on the sofa, which is ok for a few days. She’s my mum, I want to put her up if she needs it, but I don’t think we’ve got as far as thinking about anything longer term yet.”
“Did you get much chance to talk to her?”
“I didn’t really know what to say” Sunny said, his shoulders hunched up and I could see the tension on his face. “She was so upset, I didn’t know how to start. Hey mum, did you know what Dad made Amy have to go through alone?”
I thought I’d cried myself out over that years ago, and was surprised to find myself welling up again.
“Ah shit” Sunny said. ”I’m sorry. I’m just angry with her. But still. I need to ask her if she knew. I’d have given anything for you to not have had to go through that on your own.”
“Try not to be angry with her, my love” I told him. “She might not have had much more choice about you going than you did.”
“It’s true. My dad was pretty traditional. He made all the big decisions. I’ll try and stay a bit calmer with her.” He kissed me again. “Thank you, you always were the sensible one.”
“I’m not sure about that” I told him. “Remember the time I persuaded you and Mark to sneak out and come to a club with me? Your dad realised what we were up to and grounded you for a month for that. You didn’t even drink anything.”
We both grinned at the memory. “We were fifteen” Sunny said. “You were wearing that short skirt, it was the first time I noticed your legs. So it was well worth the punishment.”
“I’m glad you still think so” I told him.
Sunny glanced at his watch. “I have to go, my shift starts soon. Why don’t you come for dinner tomorrow? It’ll give us all a chance to catch up properly.”
“I’d love to” I told him, realising as I said it that what it also meant was another night away from him, and going back to his house as a guest rather than a live in partner. If it helped him to mend his relationship with his mum then it would be worth giving them some space for a few days.
Getting back into work after lunch, I tried to throw myself back into the spreadsheets but for some reason now I found it much harder to concentrate. Indeed, even the following day seemed to drag. It felt as though weeks, rather than hours had passed before I found myself standing on the doorstep, ringing the bell rather than letting myself in with my key, to go for dinner.
Sunny let me in, greeting me with a kiss, which helped to soothe the butterflies in my tummy a little. His mum was in the kitchen putting the finishing touches to dinner. It smelt amazing, and I found myself feeling hopeful about how this might go. I went in to say good evening to her, but she barely responded. Sunny put his arm around me and led me back out to the table. “She just needs some space to cook” he reassured me, pouring me a glass of juice. I felt less sure of this but thought I’d better give her the benefit of the doubt.
The meal was delicious, steamed fish with ginger, green leafy vegetables I’d never eaten before stir fried in a garlicky soy concoction. Being enthusiastic about the food was easy. Feeling at ease with the company though got harder by the minute. I don’t know whether it was the length of time that she’s been away or a conscious decision, but Pamela did not speak in English throughout the meal.
At first Sunny was patient and polite, translating my compliments about the meal. Half way through he tried joking with her, in English, that she try speaking it in case she did decide to come back to live here. She stared at him for a few seconds until he gave up and started eating again. It turns out that making a conversation flow is hard when you have to go through a translator.
“So how are you finding being back? Are you jetlagged?”
Two minute pause while this gets passed on and the answer comes back.
“I’m fine.”
“How does it feel to be back in London after a few years in China?”
Pause.
“It’s ok. Busy.”
“It must be nice for you and Sunny to see each other again.”
Long pause, from Sunny and Pamela.
“Yes.”
Eventually we finished, and I helped Sunny carry the dishes into the kitchen.
“I think I’d better stay with my folks for a bit longer” I told him.
“Unless you want to share the sofa with me that’s probably a good idea” he agreed.
“I’d rather be with you” I said, reaching out to him for a cuddle. If we weren’t going to be staying together for a few days I’d better get a few extra hugs in when I could.
“I know, me too, but mum’s pretty old fashioned. I don’t know how she’d take it walking in to find us both in there.”
“Ok, I’ll head off in a minute. I just need to grab some more clothes.”
He got up and left the room, I carried on packing on my own.
Chapter Eighteen
The next week was a busy one. I was organising a networking event so that my groups could meet each out more about other local projects. It was designed to give each group a chance to give a presentation about their work, along with a chance to eat and chat more informally afterwards. I’d been busy contacting managers to make sure that they all had a representative who was willing to speak. Getting copies of their talks so that I could set them all up ready to click through on the big screen on the day.
I spent the week photocopying agendas and making up folders. Putting together packs with free pens and merchandise with my team’s telephone number and website. The day before the event the key note speaker pulled out. I spent three hours on the phone ringing all my contacts to find someone who could help fill in at the last minute.
At six o’clock my mobile rang.
“Amy Gough, Community Team” I said, forgetting that I wasn’t still on my work phone.
“Sunny, your boyfriend speaking.”
“Hi love” I said, smiling. “How are you? Long week, I’ve missed you.”