by Dizzy Girl
Pamela left to go and see her sister on Friday morning. In the end I don’t know if she felt more used to being back in the UK, or whether she still felt guilty about coming between us, but she went by herself on the train. Sunny picked me up from work, took me back to my parents’ house to pack, yet again, then took me and all my bags back to his flat. I went to open the door as he was carrying the heaviest bags, but he put them down and swept me up and into his arms and carried me inside.
“This is for real this time Amy” he said. “No more being pulled apart, we’re here. Together, and I want to stay that way.”
“That’s great” I told him, “very romantic and all, but you have to meet Mark in an hour to start his stag night.”
“An hour is plenty” he said, carrying my bags in to the flat. “That gives you five minutes to unpack and fifty five for me to help you settle in. I thought I’d start with a personal tour of my bedroom.”
I laughed. The line might have been cheesy but it worked on me.
I had just got dressed and Sunny was still buttoning up his shirt when there was a knock at the door. Mark stood there, bag in hand. “I thought you were picking me up half an hour ago” he told Sunny. “It’s not like you to be late.” I walked out of the bedroom and when he saw me there, Mark clapped Sunny on the shoulder. “About time you two sorted things out. Right, time to go and be manly.”
They made a sight, truly. All six foot something of Mark, with his Bermuda shorts and wild hair. Sunny’s five foot nine, not a single hair of his out of place, dressed in trousers and a smart shirt. “So where are you guys going exactly?” I asked them.
“We can’t tell you” Sunny said.
“What goes on a stag night, stays on a stag night” Mark said. They performed some kind of complicated handshake, ending with a few more masculine thumps on the back. I don’t know why they didn’t just hug each other and be done with it. They each picked up a big duffel bag and wandered out, talking about how amazing this secret event was going to be.
I rang Charlie after they left. “So do you have any clue where they’ve gone?” I asked her.
“Nope. They wouldn’t tell me. As far as I can tell it is just the two of them going out. Mark said he didn’t think any of his colleagues would be up for going along, which sounds a bit weird to me. I thought blokes loved a stag do. As long as they don’t go to any strip clubs.”
“I don’t think they would. Would they?”
“Can you imagine” she said, “I can’t think the girls would go near Mark, they wouldn’t think he had any money in those shorts he was wearing. He refused to get changed into anything smart, he said he was comfy as he was. Comfy, what’s he doing that he wants to be comfy for it?” She laughed heartily down the phone.
“And I can’t imagine Sunny in a club like that either. He’s so old fashioned, he wouldn’t know where to look. He’d probably spend half the night staring at the floor or asking the girls if they’re not too cold in their underwear and offering them his jumper.”
“What are you up to tonight?” Charlie asked.
“I’m curled up on the sofa with two kinds of company” I replied. “They’re called mint choc chip and triple chocolate caramel.”
Charlie groaned. “Ice cream, I could kill for ice cream. Now my morning sickness has passed I’m hungry all the time, but Jason’s asleep so I’m stuck here with just the kiddy ice lollies and crunchy bars that I usually keep in the house for him.”
“I can bring some over if you like?” I offered.
“Seriously?” she said.
“Yup, I’ll share. As long as you don’t eat all the chocolate. Ok, you can eat most of it, you are eating for two. I can be there in five minutes, well, ten. I should probably change out of my tatty jogging bottoms before I go out in public.”
“Please don’t” said Charlie, “it’ll make me feel better about already being in my pyjamas at 8 o’clock.”
“Shall I bring my laptop? We can have another look at the wedding spreadsheet?” I asked.
“Great idea” she replied. “see you in five,” though I suspected it might take me longer than that to get my head around having to share my ice cream.
I wrote Sunny a note, just in case he got home from wherever he was, grabbed an old jumper that covered the worst of the ice cream stains on my top, and headed out. Lost in a world of balloon suppliers and centrepieces, I didn’t notice the couple out walking until I bumped into them and almost dropped my tubs.
“I’ll take a 99 flake please love” said my dad.
“Very funny” I said, rearranging my stash. “I’m on a mercy run, taking dessert to a pregnant lady in need.”
“You’re a Knight in shining armour” said my mum, kissing my cheek. “We’ll let you run now, but why don’t you and Sunny come for dinner one night next week? We’ve got Uncle Ken here on Thursday.”
“Oh mum” I said, “I’m not sure Sunny would be up for meeting Uncle Ken yet.”
“Are you saying my little brother is a bit odd?” said Mum, defensively. “Besides, Sunny is almost family. It’ll be a lovely family tea. We’ll see you at six.”
“Now that’s decided” I muttered. “We’ll see you then.”
“Why don’t you bring a bottle” mum said. “Your Uncle Ken likes a drop.”
“And so do I after I’ve chatted with him” said my dad, wincing as Mum elbowed him.
I waved them off and carried on to Charlie’s house, wondering how I was going to explain Ken to Sunny. Charlie was waiting at the door as I arrived and she ushered me in quietly, not speaking until she’d shut the living room door. “Poor Jason, he was so upset that Mark and Sunny went out without him. It took me an hour to calm him down and get him to sleep. Especially because I couldn’t even tell him where they had gone.”
“Do you think they’re in the pub?” I asked.
“I think they were thinking of something a bit different. Mark seemed much more excited than he would have just for a pub trip” Charlie replied.
“Restaurant?” I suggested.
“Just the two of them? That would be cosy” she laughed.
“Theatre?” I suggested, and we both laughed. “They might not the blokiest blokes I know but I’m sure they had something fun up their sleeves.”
“Paintballing?” Charlie asked.
“They’d need more people for a team” I said. “And can you imagine Sunny coping with all the mess? He’d have looked far more stressed when he left if he knew he was going to get dirty.”
I handed Charlie the pot of chocolate caramel and a spoon, and opened my lap top. “Ok, let’s take a few minutes to check our schedule before we’re so full of sugar that we can’t think straight. The favours should arrive tomorrow, the hotel emailed to confirm that their florist can provide the bouquet and centre pieces that you liked. How are you doing for RSVPs? We have to send final numbers by next Friday.”
Charlie used both hands to push herself off the sofa and stood up, huffing and puffing.
“You think that looked hard” she said, looking at me, “wait til you see how tricky it is to move when I get to the last few weeks. As for bending down to do shoe laces and stuff? Forget it. They don’t tell you in no baby class how hard it is to bend around a whole new human being. It’ll be crocs or bare foot I swear.” She picked up Mark’s laptop and sat down again. “I’ve got thirty-three say yes so far, including two vegetarians and one, Mark’s cousin, who has requested vegan, gluten free, no alcohol and no tomatoes. I don’t even know where to start with that one.”
“I’d send it to the hotel and let them work out what they can come up with” I laughed.
“There’s five more people we’ve not heard from, but Mark is calling them tomorrow” she said. “I’ve started a table plan.” She opened the laptap. “Oh, look.” She turned it round so that I could see the screen. “No wonder they didn’t want to tell us where they were going, see what page Mark had left open.”
“All night Star
Wars film screening” I read. “But I don’t get why they wouldn’t tell us. That sounds brilliant, as long as they’re not showing the three prequel films.”
“Read that line there” she said, pointing half way down the screen.
“Oh” I said too. “Entry to people in full costume only. That would explain why they didn’t take anyone with them. And why they both had bags.”
“What do you think they dressed as?” Charlie asked.
“Well, no disrespect to your fiancé, but I’ve heard Sunny call him Chewbacca before. He does have the height”.
“I guess he has the hair” Charlie admitted, “
but don’t tell him I said that. And Sunny?”
“That’s a tough one” I said. “I think he’ll see himself as a Luke Skywalker, the loyal, determined hero, but…”
“But what?” asked Charlie.
“I could also see him as C3PO” I admitted.
Chapter Twenty Six
I stayed at Charlie’s until we had finished the ice cream. I don’t usually like to walk on my own at night, but as it was only three roads I decided to go for it. Charlie looked too tired to put up with me any longer so I said my goodbyes and headed out. It was fully dark now, so I jogged and got home feeling sick. There is a good reason why elite athletes don’t eat pudding before their races. I let myself into the flat and curled up on the sofa to let my stomach settle before I went to bed.
I must have fallen asleep though, as once again I was awakened by Sunny and Mark coming home. At least, I supposed that it must have been them as they let themselves in with a key, but one figure was covered head to toe in long brown fur, and the other appeared to be wearing a gold robot costume.
“Busted” I called out, sitting up and reaching for my phone.
“Put your camera away” called out Sunny.
“You can’t be shy, you travelled home like that” I pointed out.
“It’s three am. There’s no one else out there to see us.”
“How did you get home from central London dressed like that?” I asked. “Did you seriously take the night bus?”
“How did you guess where we went?” Mark asked.
“You left the website open on your laptop” I told him. “Charlie and I were using it to sort out the RSVPs and it popped up.”
“You guys would make pretty decent detectives yourselves” Sunny laughed.
“But seriously, you couldn’t take that off in the cinema?” I asked.
“I need some solvent to take the fur off and I forgot to bring it” Mark said.
“Wait a minute, you glued that on? I mean, who would think that was a bad idea, with less than two weeks to go to the wedding to glue fur onto yourself.”
“I’ll have you know” said Mark, “that we weren’t even the weirdest people on the night bus. The driver didn’t blink an eye when we got on.”
I shook my head at them and got up to go to bed.
Even though I knew what they’d been up to the night before, waking up in the morning to find a wookie making coffee in your kitchen is still a bit odd. “Did you not manage to get that off yet?” I said, though he obviously hadn’t. No one sleeps in a full fur suit in July by choice. He didn’t look happy.
“I told you, I forgot the solvent. And before you say anything, the glue was the only way I could keep the face fur on. I thought I’d wait until Charlie was out at swimming lessons with Jason then sneak home.”
“Sneak” I said. “Sneak. You’re six foot two and you’re made up like Chewbacca. How quiet do you think the streets will be now?”
He went quiet, as if he hadn’t thought of this yet. He took a gulp of coffee and shrugged. “I’ll just roar at them if they say anything.”
Thankfully Sunny had managed to remove his costume, and he walked into the room looking smartly dressed and ready for work. Once again, I wondered how the three of us had ended up being brought together as friends. He and Chewbacca fist bumped, he gave me a quick kiss and headed to the door. “Tell Charlie I’ll pick you up tomorrow at ten for your spa day” he called as he left. “I don’t want you having to drive, it’s the ladies turn to feel pampered.”
“What’s that about?” Mark asked after he left. “It’s nice of him to play chauffeur to you all, but he’s missing the five a side competition to take you.”
“It’s half altruistic” I said.
“And the other half?”
“I suspect he found out about my old speeding points and doesn’t trust me with his car.”
It was a treat though, the next morning, to be driven in a car that wasn’t filled with sweet wrappers and CDs that hadn’t seen their boxes in years like mine used to be. Charlie climbed in and said “I actually feel like a grown up in this car. I bet you don’t even child lock on these doors do you?”
It was an hour’s drive to the spa, and Charlie spent most of it sleeping. Sunny and I chatted quietly so that we didn’t wake her.
“Is your mum having fun staying with your aunt?” I asked him.
“Yes, she’s called me a few times. It’s nice to be back in touch. She hasn’t made any decisions about where to live yet, but I’m going to try and visit her after the wedding. She’s been telling me about my grandad’s last few years. I’m glad she was there looking after him.”
“Have you talked to her about your dad?” I asked.
“No. I know what he was like, I lived with him for long enough.”
I got the sense I shouldn’t push too hard, but I wasn’t sure how easily he would manage to rebuild a relationship with his mum if he didn’t talk to her about why she hadn’t been able to intervene on his behalf. “Maybe she can help you understand why your dad acted the way he did.”
“I already know, he was a bastard” Sunny said. I changed the subject.
“Charlie has five of her friends coming to meet us” I said. “She doesn’t know but we’ve all decided not to drink so that she doesn’t feel left out, we’ve ordered a brunch with virgin cocktails for when she gets there, and the spa have arranged a particular masseur for her who specialises in working with pregnant women.”
“She’ll love that” Sunny said. “Then how about when you get home I can give you a massage?”
“Only if you promise that I’ll get a happy ending” I told him.
“I’ll guarantee it” he said. Then we heard gagging coming from the back seat, followed by giggling.
“Get a room” said Charlie.
Sunny blushed, “you’re awake” he said, somewhat redundantly. We pulled in to the forecourt of the spa. There were a group of women wearing bright pink feather boas and crowns.
They opened the door and helped Charlie out. Tonia came forward and gave me a hug. That was really a first, there’s been none of that during our school years. “Kelly rang, she said she’s sorry but she can’t make it. She’s come down with a nasty bug but says don’t worry. She’ll be better in time for the wedding.”
“That’s a shame” said Charlie. “We paid for meals and treatments for seven.” She turned to look at Sunny. “Are you hungry?” she asked him.
“Not that hungry” he said, looking at me for help. I shook my head at him. He made pleading eyes at me, but he still had some ground to make up. I threw him to the lions.
“Come on, you love being neat and tidy. They might be able to do a bit of man-scaping for you.”
“Park up and come and eat with us” Charlie said. “There’s no sense in wasting food, and you were only going to have to come back in a few hours to collect us anyway.” Sunny shied away. “Bride’s choice. You have to do what I say” she told him.
“Aren’t hen dos supposed to be women only?” he asked, though he looked defeated already.
“We promise not to make you get your nails done” Charlie said, taking his arm and guiding him out of the car.
The food was delicious, if a little healthy for my tastes. Charlie looked happy being pampered and I resolved to make sure that I helped out once t
he baby arrived to give her a few minutes for herself if I could. She went off for her massage and the rest of the girls drifted away to get their nails done or have facials. Sunny and I were left by ourselves by the swimming pool. It was in a long subterranean room, lit by electric candles and with a background of quiet music. We had white towelling robes on, steaming mugs of herbal tea, and side by side wooden reclining chairs. I reached out and took Sunny’s hand.
“Sorry you had to join in the hen night” I told him.
“It’s ok” he replied. “I needed to know more about pregnancy. Likewise periods. I’ve always thought that men needed to know more about periods.” I laughed. “Seriously though, it’s nice to spend time with you and not having to worry about whether one of us had to leave for work in a minute.”
I got up and climbed onto his chair with him. “I’m glad that you weren’t scared off when they started talking about childbirth. I must admit I found myself thinking maybe we could leave it a few more years after Tonia told her stories.”
He stroked my hair and held me close. I kissed him, and we lay, kissing gently and chatting until Charlie and her friends returned. “I got talking to my masseur and she is a trained pregnancy yoga teacher too. She’s agreed to run a short session for us now” she said.
“We’re not pregnant” Tonia called out.
“I’m only here to eat the extra food” Sunny protested.
“Bride’s decision is final. The lady says being active in labour can help make the whole thing go more smoothly and she’s going to teach us some techniques” Charlie called, rounding us up to follow her to the studio. “First one to fart out loud when they stretch buys a round of drinks.”
Chapter Twenty Seven
I stopped into the co-op on the way home from work to buy a gift to take to dinner with my parents. There’s nothing like being faced by a wall of wine bottles to make me realise that despite a university education, I would never feel truly classy. I could identify three types of wine. Red, white and Rose. Four if you counted sparkling. Though I wasn’t entirely confident I could spot a rose wine from a white if I had my eyes shut.