She tapped her chin. “What if I slipped while we were walking down a hill and bowled you over and we both tumbled down to the bottom?”
“Then after I made certain you were all right; I’d check your footwear since you seem to be tripping a lot.”
She rolled her eyes.
He reached across and took hold of her hand in his. “Baby, I could never be embarrassed by anything you could do or say. Trust me.”
I won’t have the embarrassment of having you in our family.
She sucked in a breath.
“Daisy? What’s going on?” he asked astutely.
She forced herself to smile. “Sorry. Just thinking about something someone said to me.”
“What was it?”
“It’s in the past. The future is what counts, right?”
She could see he was unhappy, but he couldn’t argue that since it was his dictate.
“You ready to go home?” he asked instead.
She nodded and he signaled the waiter for the bill. She reached for her handbag and pulled out her wallet. A big hand reached out and wrapped around her wrist. “What do you think you’re doing?”
“Getting some cash for dinner?”
He raised one eyebrow. “I invited you out.”
“Um, yes.”
“You think when I invite you to dinner that I expect you to pay?” he grumbled, sounding seriously unhappy.
“Well, I wasn’t sure. . .”
“Now you know, I invite you out, you don’t pay. Got it?”
“I’ve got it. So, does that mean if I invite you out, then I pay?” That seemed pretty fair. She slid her wallet back into her handbag. She’d bring him back here soon, so things were even.
“No, it doesn’t.”
She frowned at him as he pulled out his credit card. The waiter rushed over with the check, stopping her from saying anything. Once he’d paid, Jed stood and pulled her chair out.
Then he slid his hand into the back pocket of her jeans as he guided her out to get their jackets. He held out hers for her, waiting for her to slide her arms in before turning her and doing it up. She sucked in a breath at the act.
He did it right up to the top then tapped her nose. “Can see there’s a lot going on in that mind of yours, babe.”
“It would be fairer if you let me pay when I invite you out to dinner,” she told him as they walked exited the restaurant. His hand slid into the back pocket of her jeans once more. She tried to move away from him to walk around a large puddle, but he simply grabbed her by the waist and lifted her over.
He set her down on the other side then cupped her face with one hand. “It’s sweet you want to pay your way, baby. But that’s not the way things go in my world.”
She frowned. “I have a job, Jed. It’s not fair for you to have to pay whenever we go out. Not to mention you still haven’t let me pay you back for those groceries you bought the other night.”
“Firstly, the money you earn is yours.”
Okay, now he was starting to really annoy her. Her money was hers then wasn’t his money his?
“And when I take my girl out, no matter who invites who, I pay. I buy groceries or gas or anything else you need, then you don’t pay me back. Especially if I’m eating said groceries. Maybe you call it old-fashioned, I call it being a man. Your man.”
God, she liked the sound of that. She’d longed to be his again for so long. But still, she thought his views were wrong. She huffed out a breath. “I don’t want to use you.”
He stepped closer and kissed her forehead gently. “Baby girl, you’re not using me.”
“It feels like things are uneven.”
He tucked her hair behind her ears. “You think there aren’t things that you do for me that I can’t reciprocate?”
She thought that through. “I can’t think of any.”
“Baby.” He kissed her gently. But didn’t say anything more.
She rolled her eyes. “You’re gonna have to say more than baby for me to understand.”
“You give me plenty. Your sweetness. Your smiles. And soon I’m gonna ask for more than that. But here isn’t the place to discuss it.”
She bit her lip to stop herself from asking him anything else. He was right, the parking lot wasn’t a place to discuss things.
“Come on. It’s getting late.”
* * *
She felt ridiculously nervous. What did he want to talk about? The drive home had been mostly silent, although he’d given her thigh a few reassuring squeezes.
“Don’t worry. It’s nothing dire. In fact, it might even be a relief for you to get this all out into the open,” he told her as he walked with her up to her front door, his hand in the back pocket of her jeans once more.
That possessive gesture never failed to make her tummy go all gooey.
He grabbed her keys from her hand and unlocked the door himself. Once they were inside, their jackets stored away, she nervously found herself standing in the living room unsure what to do.
“Why don’t you go get into your PJs, sweetheart,” he suggested. “I’m going to check the windows and doors, make sure everything is secure.”
She nodded and raced up the stairs.
“Slow down,” he told her sternly. “You’ll trip and hurt yourself.”
Knowing he was right; she stopped her headlong run. She moved into her bedroom, wincing as she saw the mess in her room. She hurriedly stuffed clothes in drawers. Not that she thought tonight was going to lead to him in her bed.
But you never knew.
She searched through her drawers for some pajamas that weren’t too childish. She finally settled on an oversized t-shirt and some cotton shorts. They would have to do. She quickly brushed her teeth, took off her make-up and moisturized. Then she wondered why she’d raced through her preparations because now she had nothing to do to put off this talk.
Damn it.
“Babe, you still getting ready or you hiding from me?”
Shit. Why did he have to be so smart?
“I’m coming,” she called back.
She walked slowly down the stairs. He looked amused by the way she dragged her feet.
“We’re just gonna chat. You’re not about to be hung, drawn and quartered.”
She blushed. “Sorry.”
He reached out and grasped her around the waist, lifting her down the last few steps.
“Whose t-shirt is this, babe?” his voice was a soft, slightly unhappy rumble.
“This? Oh, it was Brad’s.”
“Not real keen on seeing you in another man’s shirt, even your brother’s.”
“Oh. Right. Sorry.” Guess she understood that. “I wouldn’t like it if you wore another woman’s shirt.”
“I can guarantee that’s not going to happen.” The unhappiness was gone, his eyes filled with warmth.
Whoops. She hadn’t meant to say that out loud.
Such a dork.
“Thought you might have worn a cute pair of pajamas like the other night.”
She dropped her gaze. “I’ve had those for a while.”
“Looked soft and comfy.” He slid his arm around her waist. “Come on, let’s talk. You need to get to bed soon.”
“Uh, it’s not yet ten. I usually stay up way later than this.” He knew this, considering he’d called her before bed each night he couldn’t be here.
“Not anymore,” he said ominously.
What the heck did that mean?
Jed drew her into the living room. Ridiculously, he found himself nervous. Things had changed. This wasn’t about working her out of his system. This was about something that had been between them for ten years. So he knew it was time to lay everything out on the table.
His girl needed his boundaries. Needed his discipline. Needed to know she was safe with him. So she could give him all of herself.
So, he set her on the sofa then sat his ass down on the coffee table so he could see her face. Leaning forward, he took her
hands in his, wanting the connection.
“I’m starting to think I should be worried.” Wide eyes studied him.
“Not worried, babe. Just want to get some things out there. You know I’m not big on you holding back from me.”
She frowned slightly. “I haven’t been.”
“You have. I get it. But it’s over now.”
“Jed, I don’t under—”
“You suck your thumb when you sleep.”
She sucked in a breath. “Lots of people do that.”
“You got a piece of blanket you cuddle with, rub it under your nose, it’s part of one you had as a kid.”
She tried to tug her hands back, but he held firm. “So?” There was a belligerent note to her voice but he knew it came from fear. She didn’t have to be afraid.
“I think you’re a Little. Pretty damn sure of it. What I don’t know is if you know it.”
“A Little?” she asked.
“You know I’m a dominant guy, I like control. Not just with sex. You get that, right?”
“Yeah, I’ve gotten that,” she said cautiously.
“In the past I’ve gone to clubs, played with subs, never gotten serious with any of them.”
“Do you mean BDSM clubs?”
“What do you know about BDSM clubs?” he demanded. Had she been to one before?
“I edit romance books, a couple of them had BDSM in them. So when you talk about me being a Little, do you mean age play?”
“Yeah, you edit any books about Littles?” He might need to read some of these books.
She shook her head. “No, I don’t really know anything about it. You’re really a Dom? You like bondage and spanking and stuff?” She blushed slightly.
“Yeah, I like doing that sort of stuff,” he repeated, feeling the urge to smile. “I entered the scene when I was in the Navy. A friend introduced me to the scene. I’ve been around Littles. I like taking care of them, in all ways. But I’ve never met a Little who I wanted outside of a club scene. Until you.”
“What about your fiancée?” she asked.
“Jennifer wasn’t a submissive. She was the daughter of a friend of my grandfather. I was young. Didn’t realize how ill-suited we were. We parted fairly amicably once we both realized we weren’t what the other one wanted. How did you know about her anyway?”
She blushed bright red. “I. . .um. . .I looked you up. Found the engagement notice.”
“Yeah. Her parents insisted on that. Don’t see why have to announce that to everyone.”
“She was never into that stuff?” she asked.
“No. Just one of the ways we weren’t suited.”
“You really think I’m a Little?”
“Yep.”
“Because I suck my thumb and have a snuggly?”
“That’s part of it. It’s not just about what you do, though. It’s who you are. And who I am. A Daddy Dom. I get this probably scares you, sugar. It’s a lot. But it doesn’t have to. My guess is you’ve suppressed that side of yourself for a long time. That you’ve been maybe embarrassed by it. But now you know you don’t got to be. Not with me.”
She liked when he called her sugar.
She was also scared shitless. The night he’d put her to bed, he’d obviously seen her suck her thumb, snuggle her bit of blankie. . .
And he hadn’t left in disgust. He’d stuck around for days. More than that. He’d still shown her that he wanted her.
“You’re not disgusted by it? By me acting like a child?”
“Told you that you could never embarrass me and I meant it. You certainly could never disgust me. You’re sexy as hell. Those eyes, that hair, your gorgeous smile. And you’re so sweet my teeth ache. This other part of you, hell, icing on the cake. I want it all, baby girl. I want you to give me your all.”
Her mind whirled. “How does it all work? A Daddy Dom and a Little?”
“Works different for everyone. Just have to figure it out. For us, it means we no longer hide who we are. Means there might be times you’re Little Daisy, other times you’re adult Daisy. When you’re in Little headspace, then I’m Daddy. I’m the man you come to for everything, protection, care, discipline. All the time. When you’re Little, that will step up a notch. I’ll give you baths, I’ll give you playtime, corner time and spankings when they’re needed. I’ll give you a bedtime. A binky to replace your thumb. And I’ll give you that safe haven you need to be you.”
Her breath quickened. She really didn’t know how she felt about all of this.
“What do I give you?”
He smiled. Her breath caught at the sight. “You give me you.”
“That simple?” she asked.
“Wouldn’t call it simple. Probably there will be hiccups along the way. But we work it out.” He lifted her up onto his lap. “Together.”
“I like the sound of that.”
He leaned in and kissed her. “Thought you might.” Then he stood, her cradled in his arms. “Time for bed.”
“It’s still early.”
“Not for you. Now you have to be in bed by ten. Lights out by ten-thirty.”
She stiffened as he climbed the stairs. “What? That’s crazy!”
“Nope. It would be even earlier but I know you’re a night-owl, so I’m easing you into it. Might make it even earlier if you keep arguing with me though,” he warned.
She bit her lip and frowned.
“By the way, little girls who sulk generally find themselves over Daddy’s knee before they’re put to bed.”
“I think I’m gonna be big Daisy tonight.”
He shook his head with a grin. “Bedtime is for both of my girls.”
“But I won’t sleep.”
“I got an idea to help with that.” He walked into the bedroom and set her down on the bed. “Stay.”
She resisted the urge to salute him. Just.
He just strode back to her, pajamas fisted in his huge, callused hand.
Then held out his hand to her. “Stand up, sugar.”
She stood and as grabbed the bottom of her t-shirt. Her heart started to race. “Wh-what are you doing?”
“I like these jammies. Like you in them better than I like you in your brother’s tee. So wear them for me, yeah?”
“O-okay,” she said hesitantly. Fear slithered through her tummy. She took in a deep breath. She thought she was past this. It had been a long time. This was Jed. There was no reason for her to fear Jed.
“Calm, baby girl. Nothing’s happening tonight, except for me giving you a reward for eating your salad. Arms up.”
She raised her arms. She could do this. Would do this.
They weren’t taking anything more from her. Not this.
He slid the t-shirt off and his gaze was caught on her breasts.
“Fuck me, you’re beautiful.”
Her tension eased slightly. “You’ve seen them before.” They might not have had sex, but they had done plenty of playing.
“Oh yeah. Something a man doesn’t forget but it’s nothing like having them in front of you.” She didn’t breathe as he stared at her. Then he leaned down, circled her nipple with his tongue. Sucked it into his mouth.
Fuck. She swore she could feel that tug on her clit. She had to place her hands on his shoulders to hold herself steady. He lifted his head up, his eyes filled with heat. “Damn, baby.”
Her thoughts exactly.
“You sure you couldn’t rethink that whole no-sex thing tonight?” she asked. Heat was flooding her system, making it hard for her to think.
“Soon, baby. Real soon. Lie back on the bed.”
Still in a fog of need, she climbed onto the bed and lay on her back. He undid her shorts and that haze started to clear.
“Jed.”
“Hush,” he told her. “No thinking. No worrying. All you got to do is lie back and let me take care of you.”
She could do that. She thought. She raised her hips as he slid her jeans down. When he got them to her knee
s, he stilled, brought his hand to her still slightly bruised thigh. “How’d you do that, baby?”
“Bumped into something.” She hated lying to him. It burned a hole in her gut and wouldn’t be happy if he knew.
She just had to make sure he never knew.
“Poor baby.”
She was lucky he wasn’t looking at her when she lied as she was pretty sure her poker face was crap. But he just kept pushing her jeans down her legs. He sat next to her, facing her, his thigh pressed against her side and took her in. He ran a finger lightly around each nipple then down her stomach to the top of her panties. They were satin, pale pink and had a small bow at the front.
“Pretty.”
“I just bought them,” she blurted out.
“For me?” his voice deepened.
“Yep.”
“Like that even more.”
She smiled at him. “Good,” she whispered.
“Very good.” He ran his finger along the top of her panties. “You don’t sleep in panties anymore, though.”
“I don’t?”
“Nope. Don’t sleep with pajama bottoms on either. When I’m in bed with you, I want to be able to get you without anything getting in my way.”
Oh wow. Her heart raced so hard, she felt ill. “Bottom up, babe,” he commanded.
She raised her ass and he slid the panties right off. Then his gaze turned to her. And locked on her pussy. He ran a finger over her bare lips.
“Shave this for me too?”
“Yes,” she said so quietly it was a miracle he could hear.
“Like that too.”
Thank God. She might not have had sex, but she knew things. And she figured most men liked a bare pussy. Still, she hadn’t known what he would like.
“Spread your legs for me, babe.”
Need rolled through her. Slowly, she pushed her thighs apart and let out a startled cry, reaching down to grab at his hand as he ran his finger around her swollen clit. He paused, gave her a stern look.
“Hands behind your head, baby girl.”
“Wh-what?”
“Hands behind your head. Move them and I have another way of helping you sleep. Be much less pleasurable for you, though.”
She quickly moved her hands.
“That’s better. I want to touch my baby, then she’s going to let me. You’re so wet.”
Daddy’s Lost Love Page 10