He was gone.
Taking a deep breath, Lucy told herself to remain calm. That there was no reason, beyond her unfounded fear, to panic this way.
She panicked anyway. She couldn’t help it. When she’d been in love with Jeff, the climate within her world had changed just as suddenly. One day everything had been perfect, the next, the walls came crumbling down, sealing her away from him.
It was happening again. Why else hadn’t he woken her up to say he was leaving? That he had an appointment he’d forgotten about? That Emmett had called and asked to see him? There was no plausible explanation.
Grabbing her robe, nurturing a hope she knew was groundless but prayed wasn’t, Lucy hurried out of the bedroom.
“Collin?” There was no answer. She raised her voice and called again. “Collin?”
Only the sound of her own breathing echoed back to her within the empty apartment.
She was right. He was gone.
Fourteen
It had to be done.
Disgruntled, Jason threw down the newspaper he had just been scanning and stepped over it to the hotel window. The window looked out onto an alley, allowing only a moderate amount of light. The third-rate accommodations weren’t to his liking, but freedom was. No one would think of looking for him here.
Jason blew out a breath as he glanced back at the paper. At his thoughts.
He didn’t like having to trust someone else to do what needed to be done, but it was too dangerous for him to show his face in as public a place as the hospital. Disguised or not, someone might recognize him, especially the closer he got to the guard’s ICU. There was a limit to how charmed his life was.
Jason clenched his fists at his sides in a fit of impotence.
Why couldn’t that bastard just die instead of lingering like this? Each day Jason scanned the paper, listened to the news, but there was no indication that the second guard had done what he’d been supposed to do and died.
He couldn’t wait any longer. The transport guard had to be eliminated. And Jason was going to have to trust someone. For at least a little while. Until the deed was executed and the man returned to him to report on his success.
He knew just the man to use.
Putting on a Stetson and a pair of sunglasses, Jason shrugged into his jacket and went outside to find a pay phone.
Collin made up his mind as he packed.
With each piece of clothing he tossed into the mouth of his duffel bag, his resolution became that much firmer. He was going to ask Colonel Eagleton for a reassignment. As far as he was concerned, his globe-trotting, bullet-dodging days were over. He’d put in his time and earned the right to enjoy life at a less hazardous pace.
If Lucy hadn’t come along, he would have continued on this path because he’d had nothing else to compare it to. But she had come along and now what he had been doing up until this point, while eminently necessary, no longer called to him. He hadn’t done it to satisfy some wanderlust, some crying need for living his life on the edge in the first place.
Yes, it had been exciting, and maybe, during some heat-filled summer evening in the future, when the only sounds to be heard were crickets calling to one another, he might grow nostalgic for the life he’d led. But he knew the feeling wouldn’t last. The moment he’d slip his arm around Lucy’s waist, pulling her to him, the nostalgia for days past would evaporate like a drop of water on the ground during a heat wave.
Funny how life arranged itself. He now felt that his place was here, with her.
Opening the medicine cabinet, he took out his shaving equipment and placed it inside a small black, zippered pouch before that, too, went into the duffel bag.
He didn’t have it all figured out yet, but that would come in time. The first step was to be in the same general area as the woman of his dreams. Because that was what she was. The woman of his dreams—and he hadn’t even known he was dreaming of her, until she’d become a reality.
Collin glanced to see that his reflection in the mirror over the small bureau was smiling at him. It wasn’t an expression that his face at rest was accustomed to assuming. But loving Lucy made him feel like smiling.
There, he’d admitted it to himself. I love Lucy. Who would have ever thought that the title of a sitcom would also define the best part of his life?
His grin grew wider.
He was psyched to put in for his transfer the moment he walked into Eagleton’s office. Undoubtedly it would take time to arrange, nothing ever moved fast in the military except for the bullets, but he was determined to get the gears in motion. The last time he’d sat back where his private life was concerned, he’d lost the woman he loved. For some unknown reason he’d gotten lucky and found someone he cared about even more. Lightning didn’t often strike in the same place twice. This time he wasn’t taking any chances.
Collin took the last of his clothes out of the closet and tossed them onto the bed. He took the shirts, two at a time, folded them and shoved them into his bag. There wasn’t much time before his flight and he wanted to stop by Lucy’s and say goodbye. The knock on the door stopped his packing. Who was that?
He’d already talked to Emmett this morning about needing to get back to Virginia. His cousin had been on his way out, doggedly determined to follow up on yet another lead and had merely nodded his assent, asking him to give him a call if he could get back.
He had to hand it to Emmett. He’d never encountered such single-minded purpose before, in or out of the military.
Was that him now? Had his cousin forgotten to tell him something?
“Make it fast, Emmett,” he said as he began to open the door. “I’m in a hurry.”
The words cut through her like the serrated blade Jason had used so ruthlessly in his bid for freedom.
Lucy raised her chin defiantly. “To escape?” she asked.
The sound of his voice, the echo of his words, unleashed a fury inside of her she hadn’t realized she was struggling to keep in check. Just looking at him, packing up his gear, was like standing still for a punch to the gut.
She’d been right. Collin was leaving.
Just like that.
How could he? How could Collin just up and leave her like this, without a word? Without even waking her? She’d trusted this man with her heart and he was deserting her.
She’d been so certain she knew him, and yet, here he was, just like any other man. Obviously what had happened between them had been just a casual fling for him, nothing more.
He looked surprised to see her and all he said was “Lucy.”
She pulled her shoulders back. Pulled her tears back, as well. “Well, you remember the name. I guess that’s something.”
Collin stared at her as he shut the door. “Why shouldn’t I remember your name?”
She didn’t bother answering that. Instead she looked at the duffel bag on his bed. The khaki bag lay there, mocking her. His belongings were spilling out of its mouth.
“You’re leaving.” It wasn’t a question, it was more like a death sentence. To everything she’d so foolishly thought she had.
He glanced at the bag involuntarily, as if it served to answer her question. “Yes, the colonel called this morning.”
And she just bet that Collin couldn’t wait to jump on that plane, to get away from her.
Damn you, Collin Jamison. Damn that heart of yours that wouldn’t open up to me.
It took effort, but Lucy got herself back under control as she walked over to the bed. Carefully, she refolded the last shirt he’d dropped beside the bag. She wanted to scream at him, to demand to know why he’d slipped away like some thief in the night instead of waking her to tell her he had to go. To tell her that he didn’t want to, but he had to. To tell her that maybe, just maybe, he’d be back. She would have forgiven him anything, as long as she felt that he cared.
But he didn’t care, did he? The fact that he’d left her without a word proved that.
“Long assignment?” she asked
casually, silently congratulating herself for keeping her voice aloof, distant.
“I don’t know yet.” He wanted to tell her that he’d be back as soon as he could, but he didn’t want to give her any false hopes as to when that would be if he couldn’t get his transfer. The colonel might not let him put in for a transfer unless he’d finished whatever it was that he’d been assigned. “I’ll call you when I find out,” he tagged on almost as an afterthought.
Don’t do me any little favors. Lucy shrugged carelessly. “Whatever.” She tucked in the last shirt on top of the others, then stepped back from the bed. That’s that, isn’t it? She struggled not to let her voice crack. “Well, godspeed, or whatever it is they say in this kind of a situation.” She pretended to look at her watch but in reality saw nothing except her own heartbreak looming in front of her. “I’d better be getting on to the M.E.’s office.”
Collin didn’t like her tone. It was strained, cool. As if they were strangers who had only now met. As if she’d just happened to pass by his hotel room, with its door ajar, and paused to look in.
He shifted in front of her as she began to leave. “Are you angry about something?”
Yes, you jerk. I’m angry because I fell for you. I’m angry because now that you got more than just a piece of me, you’re flying away without so much as a backward glance. Most of all, I’m angry because I don’t think I can get over you. Not for a long, long time.
With supreme effort, Lucy pasted a careless smile on her lips. “Not a thing. See you, Military Man.” And with that, she walked out.
Had he not been so stunned by her blasé attitude, he would have stopped Lucy and put more questions to her. But because he was stunned, he wasn’t reacting like the professional he was, ready for absolutely anything. He was reacting like a man who’d allowed himself to become vulnerable. This was an entirely new role for him.
Hence, speed was not with him. By the time he did react, the door had already closed behind her departing figure.
Coming to, he moved quickly and pulled the door open again.
“Lucy!”
But she was nowhere in sight. He looked up and down the hall. It was as if she’d just evaporated into thin air. As if he’d imagined all of this.
What the hell had just happened here?
He was still wondering that as he boarded his plane half an hour later.
Damn it, if he lived to be a hundred, he wasn’t going to understand women. Here he was, ready to turn his whole life inside out and around for her and she was acting as if he was some odious creature that had just crawled out from under a rock. He had half a mind to forget about everything, about her, about his plans for settling down in Texas, and just go on with his life as if nothing had happened.
But something had.
He’d discovered that he had a heart. A heart that could be bruised and…
His own thoughts, usually so organized, echoed back to him in a jumble of half-formed words and sentences, making him feel as if there was something he was missing, some clue he was overlooking.
Lucy really had him going….
And then he realized that here he was, making all these plans for the two of them, and he hadn’t told her word one about any of it. He’d left her bed in silence and kept up that silence. She’d surprised him so much, popping up at his hotel room, he hadn’t had a chance to say anything to her about it. About coming back to her. About their future.
He thought back to what Emmett had said to him in the restaurant. Wow, he really was lousy at this male-female thing, wasn’t he?
The next thought hit him like a thunderbolt. What if Lucy thought that he had intended to leave her without telling her that he was going?
That was it, wasn’t it? That was why she’d acted the way she had when she’d come to the hotel room. Because she thought she’d caught him in the act of abandoning her.
Damn it, how could she think that of him?
Well, had he given her any cause not to? He’d left her bed, hadn’t he? Without a note, without anything. Never getting a chance to make this right.
Concerned, he took out his cell phone to call her. Punching in the numbers on the keyboard, he listened to the phone ring on the other end.
And ring and ring until finally a tinny voice came on, telling him that the mobile phone party was either out of the area or not answering his cell phone.
“No kidding, Sherlock.” Collin didn’t bother swallowing the curse that rose to his lips as he shut his phone.
Unbuckling his seat belt, he rose and headed straight for the cockpit.
Lucy felt as if she were sleepwalking. As if she were being held in the grasp of some horrible, unending nightmare.
Her prince had turned out to be a troll.
No, that wasn’t right, either, she corrected miserably. Collin hadn’t made her any promises. Not verbally, anyway, she thought rebelliously.
But silently, with his eyes, with his touch, there were promises made. Pledges of eternity. Didn’t that count?
She shoved the middle drawer shut. Hard enough to send some papers flying off the desk and to the floor. She bent to pick them up.
“Stop it,” she lectured herself angrily. “You’re twenty-six years old, grow up, for God’s sake, Luce.”
“Is this a private conversation or can anyone get in?”
Startled, she looked up and saw that Harley was in the doorway, watching her.
Embarrassed, she rose to her feet, even though for the life of her she had no idea where she was going next. She tossed her head before she looked up at him.
“It’s a private argument, but it’s over.” Really over. “What do you need?”
The portly man answered without hesitation. “My bank account tripled, chocolate cake to be declared a necessary food supplement and a date for Saturday night. But I came here to tell you something I thought you might be interested in, given your prior supposedly ‘covert’ activity.” He ended the sentence with a broad grin.
She’d come to consider Dr. Harley Daniels a friend and right now she was dying for something to sink her teeth and mind into, something that would take her thoughts off this incredible pain that was shredding her apart bit by bit.
Lucy strove to center all her attention on what he was saying. “Oh?”
“That guard you were so interested in? The one involved in that maniac’s prison escape?”
Impatience didn’t just weave in and out of her, it was doing a major number on her nerves. She struggled to keep her voice calm. “Yes, what about him?”
Harley took a candy bar out of the deep pockets of his lab coat and began to unwrap it with great care, as if it was bordering on a religious experience. “Word has it that he’s regained consciousness. He’s been floating in and out for the last few hours.”
“How do you know that?”
He winked at her. “We amiable types have our ways.” Harley took a bite out of the bar, then added, “The FBI is hopeful that he might be able to give them a coherent statement sometime late today or possibly tomorrow morning.”
She didn’t even bother to pretend to deny that she was somehow following the case, trying to take an active part. Harley might have had his faults, but one of them wasn’t stupidity.
Lucy remembered her promise to Collin, that she’d let him know if she heard anything new about the search for Jason. This might be the break he was looking for. Certainly nothing else had turned up lately.
Her fingers curled around the cell phone in her pocket. She thought of calling Collin with the news, but knew she couldn’t hear the sound of his voice without falling apart. Besides, what did she have to tell him? Third-hand information. It would be better if she went to see the guard herself, see what she could ascertain. And, if there was anything to tell, maybe she would contact Collin’s cousin Emmett instead. After all, Jason was his brother.
She felt as if all her thoughts were colliding with one another. She wasn’t used to feeling this web of confusion
closing in tightly around her brain.
“Oh,” she said again, trying desperately to reform her thoughts into something coherent.
She needed to see the guard herself. As soon as possible.
Lucy pressed her lips together and looked at Harley. “Could I—?”
Harley was way ahead of her. Tossing the candy bar wrapper into the wastepaper basket, he waved her out of the room. “Go, go. I’ll cover for you.”
She smiled at him. “Thanks.” Lucy started for the door.
“Sure. Anything to get that look off.”
She stopped short and turned around. “‘Look’?” she echoed.
“Yeah. The one on your face right now.” He took a step closer to her as he made the observation, his voice kindly rather than teasing. “You look as if you’ve just lost your best friend.”
“No,” she said quietly, looking at him pointedly. “All my friends are exactly where they always were.” She’d just made a mistake in counting someone new in their number, she added silently.
Harley went to the locker she never kept locked. Opening the door, he took her jacket off the hook and held it out to her. “I think we need another sample of his DNA. I misplaced the last sample.”
She knew he hadn’t done any such thing and, as far as the coroner’s office was concerned, there was no real need for any sample in the first place. Harley was giving her an excuse to see the guard. He was taking the blame for the visit away from her.
Taking her jacket, Lucy paused to brush a quick kiss to his rounded cheek. “You’re the best.”
Harley flashed her a grin as he made his way out through the back entrance. “Tell me something I don’t already know.”
There was a new policeman outside the guard’s ICU door. Smaller than the first man, dark in coloring, with an air of preoccupation about him, the officer looked like less of a threat than even the first policeman had been. Reading a manual whose cover she couldn’t quite make out, the officer looked up in Lucy’s direction as she approached. But because she was wearing her white lab jacket and an ID hanging from a chord around her neck, the glance he afforded her was only cursory.
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