by Shey Stahl
“Can you believe that asshole?”
When I glance over at him, Tyler doesn’t look at me but I can see his brow furrow in confusion. “Who? Rawley?”
“No. Holden.”
Tyler twists his head in my direction, his brow raised and cheeks flushed in the cutest way. I want to reach out and touch the heat to my fingertips. Running his hand through his thick dark hair, he laughs lightly. “Actually, yes, I can. Holden, sorry, I mean fucking asshole, seemed like a turd to me.” His hand raises and flips around. “No offense.”
“None taken.” I want to slam my head on the bar and knock some sense into me. “Clearly. He couldn’t even cheat on me with someone hot. No he had to pick some average-looking blonde with perky tits and a fake tan from California.”
“Oh, I’m gonna need more on this. Did he give you a reason? And how do you know she’s from California?”
“No, he didn’t give me a reason. At least not one I understood and all sluts are from California.” I’m sure that’s not accurate, but in my head, tonight, it’s totally fucking accurate. I reach for the whiskey and pour both Tyler and myself a shot. Zack eyes the two of us and what’s happening, like he knows we’re having one of those nights where it’s best to keep your opinions to yourself. “So… yeah, no real reason but I mean, balls deep in another girl pretty much explains it, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah.” He rubs his left thumb over his bottom lip. “I suppose it does.”
I can’t help but shift my gaze to his beautiful full lips. Tyler has one of those mouths you just want to suck on. His lips are like your favorite candy that you just want to lick all day.
When I finally force my eyes back to up to Tyler’s face, he’s staring at me.
My chest tightens as I swallow. There is no missing the way his eyes linger on me, watching my every move.
He’s curious, I know he is.
“So you catch him balls deep in some chick and he doesn’t even give you a reason why he cheated?”
“Apparently I have expectations no man can ever meet,” I tell him. “I mean, seriously, are there any good men left? And I’m talking the honest ones. Ones who aren’t dating someone else or are married. Ones who have some fucking chivalry in them.”
Tyler flips his hand around, his rosy cheeks indicating he’s feeling pretty good with that third drink. “What you’re asking for is bullshit,” he says bluntly. “Chivalry is overrated. You’re puttin’ too much pressure on it. A relationship should be simple.”
“Simple as what?”
He looks me straight in the eye. “Simple as I want to fuck you.”
Is he saying that to me?
“Of course you would say that.” I sigh, knowing he is right in some sense. “Guys just want a girl who lets them put their D in their V and it’s over, right?”
“Wait.” His brow raises. “Did you just say put their D in their V? Do you think you’re talking to Nova? Why can’t you say vagina and dick?”
“Oh, I can say it, and I’m pretty sure you’ve heard me say worse.”
“True, but I think it’s fucking hilarious that you’re not saying it now. Also I kinda want to hear you say it.”
“Dick and vagina.”
His eyes meet mine, amusement flickers in them. “Or cock and pussy.”
The way he says cock and pussy makes my stomach clench. Straight up fucking clench. It’s damn near fucking erotic sounding. My heart pounds, fluttering in my chest. Clearing my throat, I say, “Or… muff and wang.”
He shakes his head and lifts his drink to his lips casually but grins. “That’s the name of a porno I watched once.”
“Really?”
He holds up his hand, a smile lingering in his eyes. “No… not really, but it totally should be.”
Why are you so fucking adorable?
“Enough about me. I told you why I’m here so now it’s your turn. Spill. What’s with you and Berkley?” Of course I asked that. For the last six years Tyler has dated one girl. Berkley Logan. And it ended suddenly about a month ago. In the first few years it was clear they had an open relationship, but then they settled down for the last two years and seemed happy. Not so much anymore.
“Next question.” Smirking, he tries to get away with that answer.
Not happening.
“Nope. Answer me.”
Tyler leans back slightly and runs a hand over his face before staring up at the television screen playing highlights of the baseball game. “I don’t fucking know. Never gave me a direct answer.”
“Relationships suck.”
He holds up his drink. “I’ll fuckin’ drink to that.”
And we do. Three shots to be exact. Each.
And then comes a little truth. “I came home one day and she had moved out,” he finally tells me after his fourth shot. “Said she needed to find herself.”
“Bullshit!” I yell, entirely too loud.
“Right?” He nods and then his gaze drops to the shot glass he’s flipping over in his hand now. “Four fucking years.”
I laugh. “I thought it was six.”
“I don’t fucking know.” He snorts and drops his head in his hands. “Maybe that’s where I went wrong.”
“Maybe.”
I lay my arm on his shoulder. “We’re a mess.”
“Hot mess.”
He winks and then drags his eyes south. “Hot is an understatement.”
I wish he’d drag his mouth over mine!
Good thing I’m sitting or I’d drop to my knees at that look.
THE NEXT THREE hours are a blur. A fucking blur. I keep switching between the whiskey and those delicious mixes Zack should be arrested for serving me to the point that I dance on the bar with Tyler. Considering my vision’s blurred, I have no balance and poor motor skills but I’m still standing and doing pretty good.
When I’m drunk I can’t feel my lips. It’s also a general assessment that they won’t work either. Clearly.
I yell, “Drinks on me!” as we stand up there. Thankfully, Tyler saves my lying ass, steals my credit card telling everyone I’m not serious and I have no money.
Partially true. I have fifty-seven dollars in my checking account.
You would think at some point during all of this drinking I would have begun to feel sick. I drank a lot of alcohol, but maybe it was the heartache soaking it up.
Shaking myself from those thoughts, I look over to Tyler who I notice, not for the first time tonight, is staring at my chest. His gaze only lingers there for a minute and when he looks back up to meet my eyes, he winks, and we find ourselves once again smiling at each other.
A switch in the songs draws our attention toward the stage and Rawley’s playing a slower song, SafetySuit’s “Never Stop,” his attention on Sophie in the corner of the bar drinking with her friends. My brother is still in love with his ex-girlfriend, Sophie, but refuses to admit it. He’d rather fuck with her head than tell her how he feels.
I drag my eyes back to Tyler and notice that again he’s not looking at me, but instead at my chest.
It makes me sigh. Again. Actually sigh because the way he’s looking at me sears my skin with his heat and sends my heart sputtering like a misfired engine. It’s there in his eyes that he’s enjoying my reaction, along with the slow lick of his lips and the darkness in his eyes.
I think it’s worth mentioning again that I’m incredibly drunk. Having said that, I want to be clear, I’m not throwing myself at Tyler. I’m launching myself.
Sipping the drinks a little more slowly, I keep having to wipe the condensation from the glass. It drives me mad, seeing it pool around the glass. I also hate the drips when I would go to drink, and water spills all down the front of me.
Tyler’s amused and even keeps taking my napkins to see what I will do if the water pools and I have nothing to wipe it up with.
Teasing bastard. He’s done this to me since I was a kid and he realized I had obsessive compulsive disorder.
“
Want another one?” Zack asks, gesturing to my empty drink with a nod.
“I’m here to make bad decisions and regret them in the morning. Serve it up.”
Tyler laughs beside me when Zack turns around to make the drink.
“What if you don’t regret them in the morning?” Tyler asks.
“Even better.” I point my finger in his face. He tries to bite it, his cheeks flushed from his buzz.
“What the hell is in those drinks?” Tyler asks when I take a drink and moan and then looks at Zack. “Dude, cut her off already.”
Zack whispers something I don’t hear but they both laugh.
I push the menu at him and then protectively cup my glass. “It’s not on the menu. It’s a secret concoction.” The word cock rolls off my tongue nicely and doesn’t go unnoticed by Tyler.
In fact, I think it makes him uncomfortable because he shakes his head but shifts on his stool, his left arm dropping to his lap.
Resting my arm over his shoulder, I hug him to my side. I’m a happy, loving drunk and will love on anyone if they let me get close enough to them. “Man, I’ve always had a huge crush on you. I remember when I was like fifteen, and you were twenty-one, you snuck a beer from a party for me and took me out in your truck around town. Do you remember that night? It was snowing like crazy and you were doing donuts in the parking lot of the shop. You asked how old I was that night and when I said fifteen—”
“Yeah,” he interrupts, nodding. “I remember that night.”
“You said damn when I told you my age, but you knew how old I was so I couldn’t figure out why you asked.” Removing my arm, I stare curiously at him, his smile higher on one side. “Were you mad?”
“Kinda.” He shrugs, flipping a bottle cap around in his hand. “I only asked because I needed the reminder. You were pretty hot that night but way off-limits. I shouldn’t have even entertained the idea, but I did.”
I love the way he says, “But I did,” because he’s honest with me and I love honesty right now. “Well.” I shrug myself. “I’m not fifteen anymore, so there’s that.”
“No, you’re definitely not fifteen.”
I’ve only ever slept with Holden. A shocking reality, huh?
Looking at Tyler, I wonder what he’s like and if he’s a hair puller. He’s a man and all hard lines and bulging tattooed muscles and I hope he’s a hair puller. I hope he yanks the shit out of my hair.
Remember when I said when I’m drunk my mouth gets me in trouble? It’s about to happen. I can feel it coming.
“Okay, here’s some drunken truth.” His eyes on the television slowly drift to mine. “As you know from our previous conversation, I’ve had the biggest crush on you since I was old enough to crush and one thing always crossed my mind…. Are you rough in bed?” I ask with my straw in my mouth.
Tyler smiles widely and with a tip to his head, he runs his hand down his jaw. He glances at my chest and then back at my eyes. “Well, I’m not one to kiss and tell so I guess you’ll have to find out on your own.” A smile curves his lips as he gives me a narrowed look, scrutinizing my reactions. “If I were to take you home, how far would you let me go?”
Holy shit. Did he just ask me that? It means it’s crossed his mind then, right?
Against my better judgment, our eyes meet and his captivate me. “I’m… not sure.”
Yes, you are. You’re totally sure you’ll let him do whatever the fuck he wants. Admit it.
He raises his eyebrows in a playful manner but I can see the hunger in there.
I smirk, knowing how true that statement really is, but never giving him an answer. I hold the cards and I like my hand right now. Slouching slightly, but careful not to fall back off the stool, I look at him again. “You’re too sober for this conversation. You should drink more.”
“Too sober? Why’s that?”
“Because, Tyler, I’ve decided that my mission tonight is to get you to go home with me and the way I look at it, my best chance of making that happen is to get you drunk. How the hell am I supposed to get you drunk if you’re not drinking?” I take a sip from my drink. “Although, I wouldn’t actually be taking you home. For what I have in mind, we should definitely go to your place.” I sigh, lightheaded, my own intoxicated wave hovering over me. This should probably be my last one for the night or else I might throw up.
Tyler’s quiet, so naturally I become a little self-conscious. What the hell is he thinking?
Tyler motions me forward. I do as he asks and find myself hanging on the bar and giving him a clear view down my shirt. He smiles, giving a small nod. “I’m gonna let you in on a little secret, Raven. If you want me to take you home, all you have to do is ask.”
My voice is lost in my throat.
When I find it, I ask, “Take me home?”
“See, now was that so hard?” He draws his voice out like a whisper. Damn him.
“Kinda.” I roll my eyes. “I’ve had a huge crush on you since I was like fourteen or sixteen. Whatever. So I mean, yeah… do you want to?”
“As long as you’re sure, I’d be an idiot if I said no.” His gaze falls to my lips. “Wouldn’t I? Something tells me you’re a good time.”
I bet you’re a good time.
I can’t have him thinking he’s in control of this. It’d be out of my nature. “Oh, I’m sure. As far as me being a good time, well I guess you’ll have to find out.” I push the last of my drink away and reach for my purse. “I think I’m done for the night.”
He gives me that look again, the one where I should be concerned about what he really has planned. “Well that’s too bad because I think I’m just getting started.”
Fuck yes.
“I BET YOU’VE done this a lot, huh?” I ask when we’re outside in the parking lot.
He doesn’t answer, shrugging, gravel crunching beneath his feet. The air is cold, whipping around in a gentle spring breeze that’s refreshing on my burning face.
It occurs to me then that drunk Raven just needs to shut up but of course, that proves to be impossible because he’s Tyler Hemming and pretty much my dream guy.
“I don’t know whether to take that question as a compliment or an insult. What makes you think there’s been a lot of girls?”
I give him a look, intentionally letting my eyes drink in his strong physique. Olive skin, and sky blue eyes shadowed by jet black lashes search mine. “First of all, it was a compliment. Definitely a compliment. Second, look at you.” I wave my hand around in the air and unintentionally smack him in the chin. He chuckles. “There’s definitely been girls. I saw you in high school before Berkley. Different girl every night. I remember a party you and Red had when my parents were out of town. There were definitely girls.”
He gives me a look, so much hidden in those eyes. He knows exactly what party I’m referring to. The one where I caught him having sex in the backyard with Tina Gordon. I can’t forget her because her hair reminded me of cooked top ramen.
His eyes meet mine and I stop walking. His face twists and he blows out a quick breath. “Does it matter? I’m only with one girl right now.”
I laugh, which to my embarrassment comes out sounding more like a snort a baby elephant might make. “I bet you’ve used that line a time or two, haven’t you?”
Tyler regards me for a moment, his eyes sweeping down my body in an audacious way. Every inch. There’s the burn again. He’s staring at me, a look I can’t decipher. “Maybe.”
Stop thinking, Raven! This is the moment you’ve always dreamed about.
“One thing always leads to another.”
Fucking Rawley and his rightness.
I nod this time. I don’t want things getting awkward by not talking and him potentially deciding not to take me back to his place. I’m not going to lie, my curiosity nags at me. So badly. I want to know. I want to know how many he’s treated this same way, but at the same time, I don’t want to know. In some ways, I want to remain oblivious to this and enjoy it for what it i
s. A one-night stand.
As we make our way through the parking lot, my mind is racing with all my internal thinking and unfortunately, I’m not watching where I’m going. Which in my defense is easy to do when you can’t see a goddamn thing other than the moon and the lights of the bar. Forget about seeing your own feet. Zack really needs to put better lighting out here.
Tyler notices my lack of balance and says, “Hey, there, watch where you’re walking.” Before I can do that, I run right into a trailer hitch on the back of Rawley’s truck, only to be caught by two strong arms.
“Motherfucker! That’s going to leave a mark.” I turn in Tyler’s arms and push my finger into his incredibly sculpted chest. “I blame you for my inability to walk in a straight line. You let me get drunk,” I say, placing the blame on anyone but myself.
“You were already well on your way to drunk when I got there.” Cupping my cheek, his thumb grazes my mouth, toying with my bottom lip. There’s a darkness sparking in his eyes. “I just joined you.”
All I have to literally do is turn my head and I’d be kissing Tyler. And just when I think I’m going to do it, he pulls away slightly. It’s the sensation, all tingles and sparks when the roughness of his fingers meeting my skin that sends my heart racing.
He keeps his tone playful but his look sears my skin and kick starts my heart. “Don’t get shy on me now.”
His fingers find the bare skin of my collarbone… hot, damp skin begging to be touched.
I don’t reply. I can barely breathe let alone actually reply.
“How long have you wanted to kiss me?” he asks, knowing damn well I’ve wanted to more than once tonight.
Unable to force my eyes from his, I breathe out slowly, stiffness to my posture, unsure maybe because there’s desire here but there’s also the need to leave this alone. “I can’t remember a time when I didn’t want to kiss you.”
As soon as I’ve said the words, without any more hesitation, his mouth is on mine. Pulling his bottom lip with my teeth, I bite down softly drawing him into me with my hands welded around his neck. He willingly comes forward, his kiss eager. It’s not one of those kisses that happens suddenly. He eases me into it, brushing his lips lightly before his tongue slips into my mouth.