Snow Place to Die : A Bed-and-breakfast Mystery

by Mary Daheim

  old Grover mantra of finding something to laugh about even

  when things got really grim.”

  Judith knew what Renie meant. Grandma Grover, who

  had endured her share of tragedy, had never, ever, lost her

  ability to laugh. “Keep your pecker up,” she’d advised. “It’s

  always better to laugh than to cry.” Such homely, even trite

  counsel had been the family by-word, and it worked because

  it was practiced rather than preached.

  “I guess it’s this retirement thing,” Judith admitted.

  SNOW PLACE TO DIE / 35

  “And Mike getting married. Those are big life changes. You

  can’t just shrug them off. You have to stop and think what

  it all means.”

  “You think I never think?” Renie was still trudging awkwardly, if gamely, around in the snow. “I think plenty. I

  couldn’t be married to Bill if I didn’t think now and then.

  He’d shoot me. Bill thinks all the time. But what I think now

  is that you…Ooops!”

  Renie slipped in the snow at the edge of the creek and

  tumbled into the cold, swift-flowing water. Her shoulder

  struck the steep bank on the other side, dislodging a great

  chunk of snow. Judith rushed to her cousin’s aid.

  “Damn!” Renie wailed. “I’m soaked!”

  Judith tried to grab Renie’s hands, but their heavy gloves

  impeded them. They grappled for several moments, with

  Renie finally trying to gain some purchase on a boulder in

  the creek. The water rushed past her knees as she struggled

  into an upright position. Then a piece of loose ice hurtled

  into her, and she fell into the opposite bank. This time a

  veritable cloud of snow came loose from above the creek,

  pelting Renie and showering chilly particles on Judith.

  Renie swore, resurrecting every curse she’d learn at her

  seagoing father’s knee. But she’d managed to get to her feet

  and was slogging toward Judith.

  “I’m going to catch pneumonia!” she shrieked. “I’ll die

  before I can collect ten cents from OTIOSE!”

  Judith, however, barely heard her cousin’s lamentations.

  Her eyes were fixed on the far bank which now revealed a

  gaping hole above the creek. Broken branches protruded

  from each side, like long wooden fangs. Hazily, Judith

  thought of the ice caves she and Renie had explored in their

  youth a few miles from the family cabin. But this opening

  wasn’t quite the same. It was much smaller, no bigger than

  a hall closet, and not quite as high.

  What made it remarkable was the body inside.

  36 / Mary Daheim

  Judith tried not to scream. She succeeded, and just stood

  there while Renie collapsed against her shoulder. “Do you

  have any spare underwear?” Renie murmured through chattering teeth.

  Judith didn’t respond. She was transfixed. “Coz,” she finally

  gulped, “I hate to mention this, but…” Gently, she held Renie

  by the shoulders and turned her around. “Look.”

  “Good God.” Renie sagged against Judith. “I don’t believe

  it.”

  The cousins stood together in silence for what seemed like

  a very long time. The sun was setting, the clouds were rolling

  in, and it was beginning to grow dark. At last, Judith and

  Renie moved.

  “I might as well get wet, too,” Judith sighed. She waded

  into the creek and crossed the four-foot gap to the other side.

  “Dare I ask what you’re doing?” Renie inquired in a bleak

  voice.

  “Ohhh,” Judith replied, sounding weary and haggard, “just

  the usual cursory check. Whoever these poor bones belonged

  to still possesses remnants of clothing.”

  “Don’t touch anything!” Renie shouted. “Come on, get

  back here! I’m turning blue!”

  But Judith’s curiosity overwhelmed caution and consideration. “We can’t just run away. Besides, I wondered if…ah!”

  She held up a wallet. “There’s more, scattered around the

  ground.” Despite her aversion to being in such close quarters

  with skeletal remains, Judith dug around in the snow and

  ice. She found a keychain, a watch, a coin purse, and a soggy

  notebook. Unable to convey so many small items in her big

  gloves, she tossed each in turn to Renie, who stuffed them

  into the pocket of her all-weather jacket.

  Judith had kept the wallet in her own coat. After she was

  satisfied that there was nothing else in the little cave except

  SNOW PLACE TO DIE / 37

  the body, she recrossed the creek and stood next to Renie,

  shivering and shaking with cold.

  “Let’s not dawdle,” Judith said. “I feel like a freaking

  popsicle.”

  “I’m already dead,” Renie replied through stiff lips. “Can

  we make it back to the lodge?”

  The lodge, in fact, was less than a hundred yards away.

  Still, it took the cousins over five minutes to get there. They

  arrived in a numb, half-frozen state.

  The fair-haired man with the round head that Judith had

  noticed before lunch now stood in front of the stone fireplace

  which he’d apparently just lighted. He turned jerkily when

  the cousins entered the lobby.

  “Sorry,” he said, waving both hands as if to shoo Judith

  and Renie away. “This is a private gathering.”

  “It’s me, Russell,” Renie said in a feeble voice. “Serena

  Jones, remember?”

  Russell whipped off his rimless glasses and peered at the

  cousins. He was still wearing the glen plaid suit he’d had on

  earlier in the day. Vaguely, Judith noticed that the suit was

  blemished with grease spots. “Oh! Ms. Jones!” Russell exclaimed in astonishment. “Why are you so wet?”

  “It’s a long story,” Renie said with an inquiring glance at

  Judith. “We were…”

  Judith’s response was to shove Renie toward the dining

  room and kitchen. “First things first,” she muttered. “I can

  barely walk or talk.”

  There was a washer and dryer in an alcove off the kitchen.

  The cousins undressed, rubbed themselves down with big

  towels, and proceeded to do their laundry.

  “I didn’t bring any extra clothes,” Judith said, the feeling

  in her feet starting to return. The cousins were sitting in the

  kitchen, each wrapped in the biggest towels they could find

  in the supply room.

  “I’ve got my good suit, but that’s it.” Renie fluffed up her

  short, straight chestnut hair. “We can’t leave until our clothes

  are dry.”

  38 / Mary Daheim

  “We can’t leave anyway until I get the food out,” Judith

  said in frustration. “How am I going to do that wearing a

  towel?”

  “Nobody’s around. I’ll help. My stint’s over, and they

  won’t see me. We could do it in the nude.”

  “Yeah, right, and scare the OTIOSE executives half to

  death.” Judith grimaced. Only now that her teeth had stopped

  chattering and her limbs were responding was she able to

  face up to their awful discovery. “None of the above are the

  biggest problem, though.”


  Renie sighed. “I know. I’ve been trying to forget about it.

  Maybe we were hallucinating.”

  “We weren’t.” Judith’s eyes wandered over to a telephone

  that was set against the far wall. “We’ll have to notify the

  authorities.”

  “We could do that now,” Renie said, clumsily lighting a

  cigarette. The raw redness in her skin was beginning to fade

  and she had almost stopped shivering.

  Given the circumstances, Judith refrained from criticizing

  Renie’s newly acquired habit. Indeed, she could have used

  a cigarette herself, not to mention a stiff drink. “Hang on for

  a minute,” she said, gathering the towel around her and

  walking over to the counter where she’d put the items she’d

  collected from the little cave. “Maybe we can read some of

  this stuff.”

  The plain leather wallet was soaked, but Judith pried it

  open and saw that most of its contents were either plastic or

  encased in plasticene. “Here’s a driver’s license,” she said,

  holding the laminated item under an overhead light above

  the counter. “It’s in pretty good shape.”

  “Better shape than its owner,” Renie remarked, rubbing at

  her feet.

  “I’m afraid so…Ohmigod!” With a stricken expression on

  her oval face, Judith turned to Renie. “This belongs to Barry

  Albert Newcombe!”

  Renie slid off the tall stool where she’d been perched.

  “Barry! The disappearing caterer! Holy Mother!”

  SNOW PLACE TO DIE / 39

  With shaking fingers, Judith rifled through credit cards

  and other personal pieces of ID. “It’s him, all right. Some of

  this stuff is paper, and it’s unreadable, but here are his

  OTIOSE employee card, credit cards, gas cards, medical

  enrollment card—the whole lot.” Still clutching the wallet

  and the towel, Judith leaned against the counter.

  “I guess,” Renie said in a subdued voice, “Barry’s not

  missing anymore.”

  Judith gave a single nod. “Are you going to call the cops

  or shall I?”

  “Why call the cops?” Renie objected, puffing frantically at

  her cigarette. “We need an undertaker. Barry must have

  gotten caught in the middle of a snowstorm and froze to

  death.”

  “We need a cop because he was a missing person,” Judith

  persisted. “Besides,” she began, then made a face, “we need

  a cop, because that’s what you do when you find a body.”

  Renie winced. “I wonder if we should tell the rest of them

  about Barry first. I mean, he belonged to them, not us.”

  “We found him.” Judith chewed her lower lip. “Let’s call

  and then you can tell them about Barry.”

  “Me?” Renie placed a hand on her semiexposed chest and

  gulped. “I didn’t find him. You did.”

  “You fell and knocked down that big snow pack,” Judith

  countered.

  “I didn’t go crawling around inside the cave.”

  “This is your big project.” Judith was beginning to get annoyed. “Where’s all that bravado you were showing off an

  hour ago?”

  “I don’t know,” Renie replied, gazing around the kitchen.

  “Where is it?”

  “Oooh…We’ll do it together. As usual.” She marched over

  to the phone. “I’ll even call the cops.” She punched in 911.

  A quavery voice answered on a crackling line. Judith

  40 / Mary Daheim

  could barely understand the woman—she guessed it was a

  woman—at the other end. “I’m calling from Mountain Goat

  Lodge,” Judith said, speaking more loudly and precisely than

  usual. “We’ve found a corpse.”

  “You want a Coors?” the voice said, sounding slightly

  stronger. “This isn’t a tavern, it’s the county sheriff’s emergency line. Please hang up at once.”

  The line went dead. “She thinks I’m a nut. Now what?”

  “What?” Renie, who hadn’t heard the other half of the

  conversation, looked bewildered.

  “Never mind.” Irked, Judith redialed. The same voice

  answered. “This isn’t a joke,” Judith shouted. “We have a

  dead body at Mountain Goat Lodge.”

  There was a long pause. Judith figured the woman in the

  sheriff’s office was trying to figure out if this was a genuine

  call. “Mountain Goat?” the woman finally said. “That’s not

  our jurisdiction. Try the next county to the east.” She hung

  up again.

  “What is the next county to the east?” Judith demanded

  of Renie.

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Renie replied

  in an irritated tone. “I’m going to put our wash in the dryer

  while you figure out how to call the cops. You’re married to

  one, for God’s sake, you ought to know.”

  “I’ll try the forest service,” Judith said, trying to put a check

  on her impatience. “Their number is posted by the phone.

  If they used to own this property, they ought to know what

  county it’s in.”

  Renie’s eyebrows lifted in mock amazement. “A government agency knowing where they are? Who they are? What

  they’re…”

  As the connection was made, Judith made a shushing

  gesture with her hand. But the voice on the other end was a

  recording. The staff was out of the office, but if the caller

  would care to leave a name and number…

  Judith hung up before the message droned to its conclu- SNOW PLACE TO DIE / 41

  sion. “What staff? I’ll bet there’s only one person in a snow

  shelter next to the nearest restaurant.”

  She was looking for a phone book when the man that

  Renie had called Russell poked his head in the kitchen. “Excuse me,” he began, then gasped as he saw Judith adorned

  in the towel. “Sorry, I didn’t realize you were…ah…um…”

  “Russell?” Judith made a reassuring gesture with her free

  hand. “You work for the phone company. Do you know

  where I can find a phone book?”

  The ordinary question seemed to calm Russell. “Of course.

  There’s one in the…er…surely it would be…um…have you

  looked…ah…I’ve no idea.” His face began to turn a deep

  red.

  Judith put a hand to her shoulder-length silver-streaked

  hair and rubbed furiously at her scalp. “Okay, okay. Tell me

  this—how can I reach the local sheriff?”

  Russell’s eyebrows rose above his rimless glasses. “You

  dial 911, just as you would in the city.”

  Judith shook her head. “It doesn’t work that way. Maybe

  the lines are crossed. Have you got another suggestion?”

  “Ohhh…” Russell seemed at an utter loss. “I’m R&D, not

  operations. Really, I’m not what you’d call…practical.”

  Judith would have held her head with both hands if the

  effort wouldn’t have caused her to drop the towel. “R&D?

  What’s that? I know R&B is rhythm and blues, but…”

  “Research and development.” Renie was back in the kitchen. “Russell Craven is vice president-R&D.” She nodded

  at Russell. “Hi again. What county are we in?”

  “County?” Russell’s thin fair ha
ir seemed to twitch. “Well,

  I really couldn’t say…We are in one, though…I mean, we

  have to be, don’t we? Counties are like that, sort of next to

  each other and all…ah…Do you ladies need some clothing?”

  Renie gave Russell a toothy grin. “Now there’s a helpful

  42 / Mary Daheim

  idea, Russell. We wouldn’t mind borrowing a few items for

  just a bit. Let me see…” Renie glanced at Judith. “How about

  asking Ava and…” She paused, gazing down at her own

  towel-wrapped figure. “…Nadia. I think.”

  “Yes. Yes.” Russell nodded enthusiastically. “Ava and Nadia. Shall I…?” He gestured at the door.

  “You shall. And we thank you.” Renie cocked her head.

  Russell started out the door, then turned back. “Oh! This

  business about the sheriff…is it urgent?”

  “It’ll keep,” Renie replied dryly.

  Russell left. Five minutes later, Ava Aunuu was in the kitchen, hand-tooled leather suitcase in hand. “What

  happened?” she asked, evincing what Judith took for actual

  concern.

  Renie introduced Judith to the woman who served as

  OTIOSE’s vice president–information technology services.

  The long-winded title didn’t mean much to Judith, but she

  recalled that Ava was some kind of computer genius.

  “We fell in the creek,” Renie explained. “You and my

  cousin are about the same size, so when Russell Craven

  suggested we borrow some clothes, I thought of you.”

  “Sure,” Ava said, undoing the straps and flipping the locks

  on her suitcase. “I brought extra everything along. There’s

  underwear, too. I’m not really into clothes, but you never

  know what can happen on one of these retreats.” Her brown

  eyes danced with what might have been amusement—or

  something less pleasant.

  Judith picked up the first items she saw. A high-necked

  blue sweater and navy slacks, almost exactly like the dark

  green outfit Ava was wearing. “This’ll be great. Are you

  sure…?” She gave Ava a questioning look.

  “Well…” Ava reached into the suitcase and a removed a

  red crewneck sweater and matching slacks. “How about

  these? I’ll bet red’s your color.”

  “It is.” Judith smiled. “Thanks a lot.”

  “Don’t worry about returning them right away.” Ava’s

  strong, handsome features seemed to radiate good will.

  SNOW PLACE TO DIE / 43