Taxi to Paris

by Ruth Gogoll

  "You're so beautiful," I remarked for the I-don't-know-how-manyth time since I'd met her.

  "That doesn't help, either," she replied. She wasn't exactly sad, just realistic. She laughed. "And it's a fault that age will remove."

  I felt my tenderness for her well up inside. "You'll still be beautiful when you're eighty."

  She raised her eyebrows. "If I live that long, we can test your prediction," she joked.

  I played with her hair some more. "Do you have any plans for this evening?" I asked harmlessly.

  She looked at me with astonishment. "What made you think of that?"

  "It could happen." I shrugged my shoulders.

  "You mean: appointments?" She looked annoyed. Her face closed itself. I always got off on the wrong foot!

  "No," I corrected quickly. "I actually hadn't assumed that. It's about something else." She still looked closed.

  I sighed. "Karin asked me earlier if we could meet her down at the pub this evening." The diplomatic route was not in my cards! I would be damned to directness my whole life.

  "We?" She'd picked out the deciding factor right away.

  "Yes," I replied, as though it were completely self-explanatory. "And I said yes." She started to shake her head. I followed quickly, "You're not exactly innocent in this. At that point in time, I was unable to think at all."

  She remembered and had to smile. That was something! "Still..." She was cautious. Her expression became serious again.

  Her thoughts were the same as the last time I'd asked her out to dinner; that I could imagine. And they weren't exactly unfounded, as I'd seen for myself. "You won't meet anyone you know at this pub," I explained reassuringly.

  "How do you know that for sure?" she countered defensively.

  I laughed. "The people there can barely afford their pizza." Dammit, what had I been thinking? Nothing, that was the problem. And the expected reaction came right away.

  "You mean the women there can't afford me?" I wasn't about to convince her to go this way!

  "Pardon me, please," I pleaded softly. "I wasn't thinking again. I didn't mean it that way."

  She wasn't quite ready to be calmed. "You're probably right," she snapped harshly.

  I pushed myself closer to her and touched her cheek. She just let it happen. She didn't seem to feel anything at all. "Please. Let's not have this discussion now. I know I made a mistake. But I don't want to ruin the evening that way."

  She refused to soften. Her face remained motionless. I just bent over and kissed her softly on the lips, that were so cool and reserved. "Can't you forgive me one more time?" I whispered against her mouth. "I'll behave myself better. I promise."

  The corners of her mouth twitched a little. "But only this once." I had her - thank God!

  I hugged her and rolled around the bed with her. Now she lay on top of me. I kneaded her butt cheeks. I would have liked most to pull all of her inside me. "Will you come?" I asked casually.

  "No."

  I squeezed her bottom tighter and pressed her against me. "Really?" I asked again.

  "No." She persisted.

  I let one leg slide between hers and lifted it gently. At the same time, I pressed her more tightly against me and began to move beneath her.

  "You'll regret it," I warned.

  "I already do," she said. When I reached a hand between her legs from behind, she moaned. It almost sounded like she was enjoying it against her will.

  "Please, say yes," I begged her. "Karin will be very disappointed if you don't come."

  "You just want to show me off," she countered laboriously. Her hips had begun to follow my movements.

  "Yes, there's some truth to that," I admitted. "I also want to show you off. I don't know a single other woman who can match you."

  "In what area?" she asked mistrustfully. Her voice already sounded very forced.

  "All of them." I lay still. "I don't want to force you into anything," I explained softly. "I want you to do it willingly."

  She lay still as well. Her breathing was still rather heavy. "Willingly," she repeated, as though she had to think about what that word meant. I waited. She changed the word a little. "Of my own free will," she said now. I caressed her back. She relaxed on top of me. "That must be nice," she philosophized, completely absorbed in the thought. "To do something of your own free will."

  She almost made me cry with the thoughts she spoke aloud. Finally, she decided. "I think I'll do it. Of my own free will," she continued with special emphasis.

  I pulled her head down to me and kissed her. "I'm so glad."

  Chapter 26

  Karin came through the saloon doors into the pub. She saw me and came over to our table. Before she even greeted me, she looked my companion over. "So this is she." Karin gave me a reproachful look. "Why have you been hiding her?"

  I looked back questioningly. What did she mean? "Venus would die of jealousy," she added. If I hadn't known Karin so well, I would've assumed she was only flirting. But I knew, if she'd ever meant anything seriously in her life, this was it. "You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." It was a genuine compliment.

  I saw a defensive motion next to me. Karin saw it as well and sat down. She reached for the hand that lay next to mine on the table. As she had done back in the bistro, her first reaction was to pull away. Karin wouldn't let her. "No, no," she insisted gently. "We're among family here." She glanced around wildly. "And anyone else can just dare say something against it!" She grew more serious. "I'm glad you're feeling better. After what Aunt Hildegard hinted at - she couldn't tell me any details, of course, because of doctor-patient confidentiality - I was afraid there might be long-term effects." She indicated the small scar on her pretty face, the one that refused to be hidden by her makeup. "Is that all?"

  My companion swallowed. "Yes," she said. She let Karin hold her hand now.

  "Aunt Hildegard?" I asked, completely shocked. "The doctor is your aunt?"

  "Well, sort of; I call her my aunt. We used to live in the same building when I was a kid. She was the loony, the work-a-holic that no one quite knew what to do with. Not married and so forth. She was always too engaged in her profession. For awhile, she treated prostitutes almost exclusively, usually at no cost."

  At the word prostitute, she twitched next to me. Then she spat quietly, "That's why you sent her to me."

  Karin was wholly unaffected. "No, that's not why. I wouldn't have known of anyone else. Because of Aunt Hildegard, I almost became a doctor myself. But I thought it was impossible to make a living that way, because I had her as a role model." She laughed. "What a mistake!"

  Next to me, a beautiful face still stared blankly ahead.

  Karin took the hand she'd been holding all along in both hands now. "I know what you are," she said. "And it's completely irrelevant to me. Couldn't you just perhaps forget about it for the evening?" Karin's facial expression changed. "Something else here is much worse," she asserted jokingly.

  "What?" I asked, although I already had a good idea what it was.

  "You're her girlfriend." She looked at her and pointed her thumb at me. "And that wouldn't be the case if I'd met you first!"

  "Karin!" I snapped in warning.

  "Keep a close eye on her." Karin's eyes twinkled. "You know I'm not monogamous."

  "Only too well," I sighed theatrically.

  Karin leaned over and gave me a friendly kiss.

  The object of our playful competition had backed away from me somewhat and looked back and forth at the two of us as if she were watching a tennis match. "May I have some say in this as well?" she asked, rather indignant.

  "No!" we forbade her simultaneously, as though from one mouth.

  She blushed slightly, took her hand decisively away from Karin, and stood up. "I'll come back when the duel is over," she told us. "In the meantime, I'm going to powder my nose." She took a few steps, then turned back toward us. "I'll take the winner." She seemed satisfied again, so she granted us a charming s
mile before going.

  "My God," whistled Karin. "She's a knock-out. How do you stand it?"

  "Not at all." I blotted my forehead. I was sure I looked like a wet poodle.

  Karin looked at me sympathetically. "Are you two still having the same problems?"

  "I don't know." I really couldn't answer that at the moment. "I don't think she's going to go back to work for awhile." At least that's how it had sounded earlier that afternoon.

  "For awhile?" Karin raised her eyebrows a little. I liked how the gesture suited her also, but it was something entirely different.

  "We haven't discussed it."

  "Mm-hmm," Karin resumed. "You don't want to tell me anything about the reasons." She knew me better than I knew myself.

  "I can't," I protested. "It's her business."

  Karin nodded knowingly. "So you have found out a thing or two."

  "I think so," I had to admit. I was surprised myself at the sudden realization. Karin said nothing and just looked at me. "I love her so much!" It broke out of me. With a desperate look in my eyes, I added, "I can't live without her any longer!"

  Karin smiled. "I can well understand that." She took my hand. "She's a wonderful woman." She shook her head. "I can hardly believe she..."

  "That she's a whore?" I followed bitterly.

  "Yes." Karin shook her head. "I've never met a woman who looks less like that than she does."

  "That's for sure," I confirmed with a sigh. "But that doesn't change the facts."

  "Maybe it does." Karin expressed her doubts in her usual, logical manner. "If her innermost being disagrees so strongly with external things, like her profession, then she'll have to make a choice one day."

  There was something to that. "And if not?" This possibility existed too, after all.

  Karin shrugged. "Then that would certainly be very bad for her."

  "And for me." I continued Karin's thought. "I don't know which one of us would go crazy first."

  Karin smiled encouragingly. "I don't think it will come to that." She smiled again. "You two make a lovely couple."

  I hung my head in order to hide my embarrassment. "She is lovely," I tried to correct her.

  "Oh?" remarked Karin, teasingly. She wouldn't fall for something like that. "And you're ugly?"

  I fidgeted. "No," I admitted, "but compared with her..."

  "She is stunningly beautiful," Karin stated. "That's true." She squeezed my hand energetically. "But your beauty together comes from something else entirely. You really love each other."

  I tried to pull my hand free. She wouldn't let it go anymore than she would with the other woman.

  "She's never said it to me," I replied uncertainly.

  "She will." Karin was convinced of that. I wasn't. "Considering the circumstances, I can understand that it's difficult for her to say those words."

  "You mean, considering her profession?"

  "Yes," said Karin. "It has a different meaning for her than for us. And the danger is greater for her."

  "What danger?" I asked obtusely. Actually, I knew the answer already.

  "The danger of getting into a situation of dependency from which she cannot escape. The danger of extortion. Whatever you like. The consequences could be deadly to her." Karin could see much more than I from her distance.

  "Her occupation could be deadly to her," I confirmed urgently.

  Karin looked at me. "Are you afraid that something like this might happen again?" she asked.

  "And how!" I was really desperate. "I can't just ignore that danger." I nodded in the direction in which she'd disappeared. "She can."

  Karin shook her head. "I don't believe that. At most, she's convinced you of that."

  I sighed in resignation. "As long as she doesn't practice her trade, I don't have to worry about it. But then...?"

  "You're going to have to talk to her about that." Karin merely spoke out loud what I already knew, but I still hadn't thought of a useful solution to the problem.

  "I've tried that already," I explained. "She minimizes the whole thing. She says it doesn't happen every day."

  "She's no doubt right about that." Karin nodded.

  "Now you're agreeing with her denial!" I raged.

  "No, I'm not," Karin corrected me. "I'm just not as biased as you are." She took my hand and kissed my fingers. "Anyhow, we're not going to solve the problem by talking about it with each other. You two have to work that out between yourselves." She let go of my hand. "Did you have a good time in bed after I called earlier?" she asked suddenly, batting her eyes innocently.

  I gulped with surprise. "That's none of your business," I mumbled. Then I had to smile in spite of myself. "But if you really must know: it was very nice."

  She grinned impishly. "Her job has its advantages, doesn't it?"

  "And disadvantages you couldn't imagine," I added. "Precisely in bed."

  This was a topic I'd always had a hard time getting her to drop.

  "I bet the advantages in bed outweigh them," she probed further.

  I let her fidget. "If you think so," I said, grinning.

  "Come on already," she insisted. "Tell me a little."

  I tossed her a crumb. "She's simply fantastic," I needled her. "What can I say about that?"

  "You've always had a sadistic streak." She was really being unfair there. "But I'll get it out of you eventually!" She slouched in pretend frustration.

  I had to laugh out loud. This was one of the few instances in which I'd won against her.

  The topic of our conversation returned to the table. "You seem to have an awful lot of fun when I'm not around," she remarked as she sat down next to me. I would have liked to greet her with a kiss.

  "We weren't talking about you," I tried to deny.

  "Yes we were." Karin didn't want to drop the thread. Provocative and greatly pleased, she winked at me.

  "What were you talking about, then?" the woman at my side asked innocently.

  "I'll tell you later." I really wanted to talk about something else. I was already embarrassed enough.

  "In bed." Karin couldn't keep herself from making every insinuating remark that came to her mind.

  "If you don't stop that right now, you're going to regret it!" I hissed at her.

  Karin made a face, as if she hadn't done anything at all. While we were glaring at each other, my companion leaned against my shoulder and laughed. "You two were talking about your telephone conversation!" It would've been a miracle if she hadn't caught on to at least part of the theme, given her expertise. Thank God it was the benign portion.

  I gave Karin a threatening look. Finally, she went along with my strategy. "Yes, exactly. We were talking about that phone call." She grinned again. "I thought I was hearing things!"

  "But you didn't hang up, either!" I grumbled, still a little annoyed.

  "Oh, please!" Karin reacted as though I'd insulted her honor. "Was I supposed to let such an opportunity pass me by? Besides..." She scooted away from me a little. "Besides, it's been a long time since I heard that kind of sound coming from you." For safety's sake, she had already prepared herself for my reaction. Otherwise, my fist would've landed right in her stomach.

  "Should I perhaps leave you two alone? I hate to interfere with courting rituals." The way the corners of her mouth crept upwards with amusement indicated that she was enjoying the situation much more than I was.

  "Courting?" I retorted indignantly. "I think you're misinterpreting the situation!"

  "No." She was certain about these things. No one could pull the wool over her eyes in this area. "You like each other very much."

  Karin looked at her and me. "That's true," she confirmed, then added, "I like both of you very much." She observed us. "You belong together," she asserted with an air of certainty. Giving my companion a final examination, she concluded, "I'm glad she finally found you." She was pointing to me. "She's been searching for you for a long time."

  It was a situation I couldn't cope with much lon
ger. "You're terribly dear, Karin," I said, close to tears. "Would you be mad if we left now anyway?"

  "No." Karin was quite satisfied. "I understand completely." She smiled. "I wasn't sure you were going to come at all."

  We left the restaurant. On the sidewalk, we walked along next to each other silently for some time. We reached the fork that divided her way home from mine. "My place or yours?" I asked.

  She looked at me. I couldn't decipher what she was thinking. "I'll go to my place and you go to yours," she answered unreadably.

  Had the evening with Karin brought up uncomfortable thoughts for her after all? Had we reminded her of her work with our insinuations?

  She saw that I was standing around uncertainly and went on. "It doesn't have anything to do with you," she explained. "I would love to be with you tonight, but I have to think about some things." She hesitated. "I'm going home now." Her words sounded regretful.

  "But not alone." My interjection came quite suddenly.

  She wanted to protest. "I told you..."

  "I'll just walk you to your door," I insisted unrelentingly. "As it should be."

  She remembered. "Oh, yes, that's right," she said. "You're so well brought-up." She smiled. "I'd sooner say gallant, but you don't like that." She hesitated anyway. "Well, ok," she gave in; nevertheless, she added cautiously, "But really just to my door!"

  I put my hand over my heart. "But of course!" I emphasized the chivalrous gesture with a slightly sarcastic bow. "I give you my word, my Lady!"

  "Then I'm relieved." She agreed, amused.

  I put my arm around her waist, and we set off in the direction of her apartment. Unfortunately, it wasn't very far. When we had arrived, I let her go regretfully. I didn't want to leave. I couldn't tear myself away from her image. "Well, then," I remarked hesitantly.

  "Until tomorrow," she said. "I'll call you."

  Well, that was new! "But not at my office again, please." Playfully, I rolled my eyes back into my head. "I'd never survive that."

  "Neither would I." Her voice sounded hoarse. She stepped toward me and took me in her arms. She kissed me. Her tongue sent me reeling. She shoved her thigh between my legs and pressed me against the doorframe. Her hand reached down and grabbed my behind. "I wish so much that you could stay," she whispered into my mouth. "But I really need to be alone." She kissed me passionately once more, then let me go and stepped back.