My finger hesitated over the keyboard before I answered.
Jenna: I think that’s not a decision that should be based on your dislike for school open houses.
His next text came swiftly.
Linc: I was afraid you were going to say that. Shit.
I shook my head and started walking again.
Another vibration and another text. I read it as I approached the bakery.
Linc: Do you think sexting from the classroom is a problem?
I frowned.
Jenna: Why? Are they saying it is? In sixth grade?
As far as I knew, Becca wasn’t even interested in boys yet. Or if she was, she was still at the age where she was playing it close to the vest, not letting on.
Linc: Not the kids. Me. God, I’m horny. And I’m bored. So I figured we could take care of both problems at once. What are you wearing?
I laughed, skimming my hair out of my eyes.
Jenna: Lincoln Turner! Shame on you. In school. I’m not going to tell you I’m wearing your favorite skirt . . . that white top you told me made you hot . . . and that’s it.
Of course, that wasn’t strictly true. I’d been at work after all, so I was quite respectably wearing underwear. But he didn’t need to know that.
Linc: Killing me, babe. Killing. Me. And when you know I can’t come over tonight. Wait, you mean you had nothing on under that today when I saw you? Damn, babe. Fucking killing me.
Our time together on school nights was rare anymore, since the kids had hours of homework and an earlier bedtime. It was a rare evening when Linc could make a good excuse to go out and come over to my place, even if he could get someone to stay with Becca and Oliver. The result was that we were both perpetually horny. I’d decided that I was addicted either to sex or to Linc; since our weekend together, I couldn’t get enough of him. It was definitely good for my ego that any time I touched him, in any way, he was raring to go. I was beginning to own my sexuality. And I’d have been lying if I’d said it wasn’t damn fun.
Pausing just outside the door to Sweetness and Bites, I tapped in one more message.
Jenna: Sorry. About to go into Kiki’s. Call me later?
Linc: Yup. Tell K I said hey. Love you.
There was little that could light up my face more than those words from Linc. I tucked away my phone and floated my way into the bakery, practically glowing.
And ran smack into Trent Wagoner.
As small a town as Burton was, it was pretty amazing that I hadn’t seen Trent since that last horrible night at the Road Block, when he’d rejected me so thoroughly and so loudly. Of course, I’d lain pretty low after that, and following my suicide attempt, I’d been in the hospital and then only left home to see my doctors and therapists. Trent had hightailed it to Michigan not long after, which made it somewhat easier for me once I did venture away from my house; at least I didn’t have to worry about running into him at every turn.
He’d come back to Burton a week after my twenty-second birthday. I’d still been living at home then, and we’d just finished breakfast when Rudy Buskill, a police sergeant who was a friend of my dad’s, knocked on the door. He hadn’t come inside, but I’d heard what he had to say anyway. Trent’s mother had been arrested for solicitation two nights before, and last night, Trent himself had arrived and bailed her out. Rudy didn’t know the details, but as he understood it, Trent was planning to stay in Burton until he could get his mom straightened out. Rudy had come by to give my dad a head’s up, just in case.
I’d retreated to my bedroom after Rudy left, but it wasn’t far enough away not to hear my parents’ discussion. My father was still furious, and he warned my mother that if he ran into that scum, as he termed Trent, he’d make him sorry he ever showed his sorry face in this town. I heard worry in my mom’s voice.
“Boomer, if you lay a hand on that boy, the only one who’s going to get into trouble is you. Use your head. Just—just stay away from him. Likely Donna Wagoner will end up getting arrested again and they’ll lock her up. Then her boy will leave. Just stay clear of him, you hear me, Boomer?”
I made up my mind then. By noon, I’d called my grandmother and made arrangements, packed a bag and informed my mother I was going to Charleston to stay indefinitely with Grandmother Wexler. I’d seen the relief in my mom’s eyes, even though she’d tried to hide it. And I didn’t return to my hometown until I’d learned that Trent and his new wife had moved to Nashville. Trent had gotten a gig playing guitar with Crissy Darwin, a rising folk singer who’d just signed with a record company. I felt fairly safe that he wouldn’t be coming back to this town any time soon.
But here he was. I realized, as I stood frozen in the open doorway, that he must’ve been about to leave the bakery. He had a box tied with string tucked under one arm and one hand on the door.
I couldn’t move. I couldn’t speak, and I couldn’t tear my eyes away from his face. He looked the same, I thought—but then no. His face was leaner, and the hint of cautious wariness that had always been part of his expression was gone. He looked . . . happy. Relaxed.
At first, he also seemed mildly puzzled, as if he couldn’t quite place what I was doing here, as though I was the one who was out of place. And then the slight smile left his face and was replaced by a mix of regret and embarrassment.
“Jenna.” He managed to speak first. “I, uh . . . how are you?”
“I’m fine,” I replied automatically. “I didn’t know you were back in town.”
“We’re passing through. I’m on tour with Crissy, and we’re heading to South Carolina. Elizabeth—my wife—wanted to stop and see some friends she made when we lived here last year.” He paused before adding, “We’re not staying. Crissy’s visiting Mason, and the tour bus is out at the Road Block. We’re hitting the highway tonight.”
“That’s nice.” I took a step back. “Well, I should get out of your way and—”
“Jenna.” Kiki had emerged from the kitchen, and she glanced from Trent to me. “Come in. Don’t go running off. Close that door, and turn the sign. We can shut down for a little bit, give you both some privacy. I think you two have some unfinished business to talk over.”
“Kiki, I’m sure Trent doesn’t have time to catch up with old . . . well. I’ll stop back later.”
“Jenna Sutton, I told you to close that door. It isn’t going to take long. And I don’t think this meeting was accidental.”
I stepped inside, turned the sign and crossed my arms over my chest. “Okay, Kiki. Now what?”
“Now I’m going to leave you two alone to finish what you need to work out.” With that, she disappeared back into the kitchen.
I rolled my eyes and huffed out a breath. “Sorry about her. She’s damned pushy.”
“Don’t I know it.” Trent rubbed his jaw ruefully. “But she’s also pretty wonderful. I couldn’t come through Burton without stopping to see her.” He shifted on his feet, his eyes going to a spot somewhere behind. “Listen, Jenna. I’m actually glad I got to see you. I’ve wanted to talk to you for a long time. To tell you how damn sorry I am for how I handled—well, everything. From the night of your birthday, right on through what happened at the party. It was all my fault. I was an idiot, and more than that—I knew better. I knew I shouldn’t have taken you home on your birthday. And I knew I should’ve talked to you the next day and told you it had been a mistake. But I didn’t, and for that, and for everything I said later—I’m so sorry, Jenna. You were a good friend to me, and I let you down in a big way. I can’t ever make that right.”
I didn’t feel like reliving that time of my life. The last thing I wanted to do was rehash something I’d put to rest. But I could tell that Trent needed to say the words.
So I nodded once. “Okay. Thanks for saying that. You didn’t have to. It was my fault—I threw myself at you, I put you into a terrible position, and then I made it even worse. But it was a long time ago, and I got over it. You should, too.” I let out a long breath. “I
heard you were married to a nice girl. You—you’re happy?”
“Very.” He imbued that one word with a ton a meaning. “Elizabeth is who I needed. She’s who I was meant for, and the crazy thing is, she loves me, too. We work, the two of us. What we have works.”
“I’m glad.” And I was. It was wonderful to realize that.
“How about you? What’re you doing these days?” Trent smiled. “I always thought you could do anything in the world you wanted. You had smarts and charisma for miles.”
“I’m working at the county historical society. I’m a project manager for restorations. Right now we’re restoring Oak Grove, that old plantation outside of town.”
“Know it well.” Trent grinned, and I remembered Kiki saying the plantation used to be a place where kids went parking. Yeah, I was sure Trent was one of them.
“Ah, well, it’s coming along nicely. You wouldn’t recognize it, I bet.”
“I hardly recognized you, Jenna, to tell you the truth. You look good. Like you’re at peace.”
I considered his words. “I am. I spent a long time figuring out where I went wrong, learning more about myself than any self-respecting twenty-three-year old woman needs to know . . . and I treaded water for a long time, hanging in limbo.” I thought of Linc’s description. “And then I found someone to pull me out and make me want to live again.”
“I’m glad.” He repeated my words back to me. “I don’t want you to worry, Jenna. I won’t be back in Burton very often. You don’t have to dread running into me again.”
“I don’t. I mean, I wouldn’t. This is your hometown, too, Trent. I understand it might not hold a lot of happy memories, but you should be able to come back when you want. We’re okay, you and me. I promise.”
Trent nodded. “Thanks. I’m glad Kiki made us do this. It’s good to have some, uh, what do they call it? Closure?”
I laughed. “Yeah, I guess so.”
“I’ll see you around, Jenna. Be well.”
“I will. You, too. Good luck on the road.”
With a parting smile and one last wave, Trent left the bakery. As soon as the jingling bell above the door stopped shaking, Kiki appeared from the kitchen.
“Well, that went well.”
I shot her a reproving glance. “Kiki, that’s some iffy shit you were playing with there. Yes, it was fine. But with the history between Trent and me, leaving us alone together might’ve been disastrous.”
“Pfft.” She waved her hand. “You’re both in a good place, and it was time you mended these last fences. Now you can move forward, freed from some of your past. Feels right, doesn’t it?”
I pulled out a chair from one of the small tables and sat down. “I guess it does. But in return for having set me up, you can plate me up one of those chocolate croissants and pour me some tea. It’s the least you can do.”
Kiki put her hands on her hips and cocked her head. “Set you up? Why, whatever do you mean, Jenna?”
I stuck out my tongue at her. “Don’t bullshit me, Kiki. You know very well just what time I come in here after work. You could’ve very easily made sure Trent was gone before I came by. So, yes. I smell set up.”
She sighed. “Even if I did, and I’m not saying that’s truth, I had the best of intentions. And like I said, it worked.”
“Doesn’t change that you were messing with a potentially tricky situation. So make sure you warm that croissant before you bring it to me, please.”
She stared at me for a minute before grinning and tossing up her hands. “Whatever you say. Geez. What happened to the Jenna who hardly talked and never asked for anything? When did you turn into this assertive—some might say pushy—woman?”
I leaned back and propped my feet on the chair opposite me. “Get used to her. This Jenna is here to stay.”
That night, when Linc called after Becca and Oliver had gone to sleep, I didn’t waste any time before telling him about running into Trent. I knew someone in town probably saw me go into the bakery and Trent emerge a bit later, and there was bound to be talk. And I didn’t want any secrets between us, not anymore.
“Do you feel better?” Linc’s voice was low and intimate. I knew he was probably talking to me from his bed.
“I think so. I feel good that I didn’t fall apart when I saw him. I was glad that we’re both able to move beyond something that happened over two years ago.”
“Was it hard? To see him again, I mean—after how you felt about him. What he meant to you.”
“Not one bit.” I was in bed, too, and I tugged the sheet up a little higher. My landlady was apparently still dealing with hot flashes and my room was like an icebox. “One thing I realized early on in my therapy was that I never loved Trent. I believed I did, but it was only infatuation, and that ran its course pretty fast after everything that happened. I didn’t try to end my life because Trent broke my heart.”
“I’m happy to hear that. Because I’d hate to have to break this jerk’s face after all, if he wanted you.”
I giggled. “He doesn’t want me any more than I want him. Matter of fact, if you really want to know, there’s only one man I want. He’s super cute, he treats me like gold, and he makes me hot and bothered. Oh, and I kind of love him.”
“Now this guy sounds like a keeper.” Linc chuckled. “And this guy is also walking around with a hard dick all the time, because he can’t get any time with his only girl. We got to do something about that, sugar.”
“Well, I’m free all week and all weekend.” I kept the phone against my ear as I snuggled down into the pillow. “Oh, except Saturday night. I have a family dinner at my mom and dad’s house. Big fun.”
“You need to talk to them, babe. Level with your mom and dad, and work it all out.”
“Hmmm.” I was noncommittal. Avoidance was cowardly, but it was a hell of a lot safer than getting real with my parents.
“Jenna.” Linc had that tone in his voice, the one that said he was about to bring up something he sensed I might not like. “I want to talk to the kids. Tell them about us. And then I want to see your parents and do the same. I’m tired of sneaking around like we’re doing something we’re ashamed of. I love you, and I want to have you with me, however that’s going to look. I want to go to bed with you every night, and not just for sex. I want to eat breakfast across the table from you, and I want to hold your hand when we’re out together with the kids. I’m ready to go public.”
I’d have been lying if I’d claimed to be surprised by Linc’s request. I’d known for a while that he wanted us to move forward, together, and we couldn’t do that before we talked to Becca and Oliver, and to my mom and dad.
It wasn’t that I didn’t feel the same way. I wanted us to start our life together, too. But I was terrified that Becca would hate the idea of me dating her dad. She and I had come so far and had become real friends. I was afraid she’d feel betrayed when she found out that I was in love with her father. I was pretty sure Oliver would accept us; he was an easy-going, affable kid, generous with his affection. He liked me.
And then there was my family. I was sure they’d be quick to assume I was making another mistake, getting involved with a man who was over a decade older than me. I didn’t look forward to arguing with them yet again.
But we couldn’t live like this forever. And sooner or later, we were going to be found out, and that would be even worse. It would be far better to do this on our own terms.
“Okay,” I whispered. “Let’s do it. But what about work? What’re we going to tell your crew?”
“I don’t think we need to have a sit-down with my guys, share our feelings and sing Kumbaya, babe. They’ll figure it out, and when they do, they’ll also figure out that the two of us being together doesn’t change a damn thing on this project. Right?”
“I guess so.” Linc knew his men, so I trusted him to make sure it would be all right. “So when do you want to do this?”
He answered me swiftly. “Tomorrow night. You
come for dinner, and we’ll talk to the kids. And then how about we tackle your family on Saturday, at the dinner?”
“Wow. You’re brave. You want to face all the Suttons at once?”
“Aw, baby, they’ll love me. They already do, actually, but now they’ll love me as someone who’s part of the family. Trust me, you’ll see.”
“Uh huh.” I sucked in a deep breath and let it out. “Well, I guess we’ll both see.”
“SWEET! SANDWICHES FROM FRANCO’S. DID Jenna bring them?” Oliver grabbed a foil paper-wrapped package off the counter and began to open it.
“Hey, kiddo, hold up there. That one might not be yours. Check to see which one has your name on it.”
“And just why did you assume I brought them?” Jenna came over to the kitchen table with a pitcher of sweet tea. “It’s not like I always bring you food.”
“Yeah, but when you do, it’s always awesome.” Ollie grinned at her, his cheeks dimpling.
Jenna laughed, pinched one of those cheeks and poured him a glass of tea. And I thought, yeah, she’s got him. Ollie wasn’t going to object when we broke the news tonight. Matter of fact, I thought, he might want to celebrate.
I watched Jenna pull out a chair, sit down and began to read the names from the sandwich wrappers, distributing them around the table. Despite her joking with Ollie, her lips were pressed together, and I could practically feel her nerves thrumming from over here. I wanted to go around the table and wrap her in my arms, just to reassure her, but that would’ve been a giveaway before we were quite ready. So instead, I made my way over to the bottom of the stairs.
“Bec! Dinner!” I bellowed, waiting to make sure she’d heard me. The tell-tale squeak of her door opening was followed by footsteps, and then she appeared at the top of the stairs, phone in her hand and the wire from her earbuds trailing around her neck. I repressed a sigh; since she’d started school this fall, I’d noticed a few changes, including the constant presence of those damn earbuds. I didn’t mind her listening to music, sure, but sometimes it felt like she was using it to distance herself from the rest of us. When I laid down the law and told her no earphones at the table, she’d rolled her eyes and given me one of those long-suffering sighs that were also new this fall.
Always Our Love Page 18