“Yes! Yes, so much...” My legs tried to close, but he held them open. He slid his tongue down toward the base of my clit, then back up toward the tip, over and over, yet with less pressure each time.
“Don't move your arms. Put your hands back above your head.”
I gripped my wrists, doing what he said. Nearly mindless from frustration, I had been about to drag my nails over my sides. I wanted to push my hips toward him, break position just to feel him hold me down. His lips wrapped firmly around my clit and I froze. He sucked gently, stroking the tip with his tongue. Every time he stopped, starting a beat after I expected to feel something, orgasm drifted further away before it rushed back.
“Please! I'm going to come-”
“Not until I let you, you're not. Stop moving.”
I found the willpower to keep my hips still. A strong tingling sensation raced through my clit. I felt how hard my g-spot was throbbing and how dangerously close I'd been.
“You tried to get away from me before, hm?”
“I'm sorry, Sir!” I nearly screamed, feeling his fingers slowly pushing inside me. They curled against my g-spot and stayed still.
“Are you ever going to do that again? … Answer me.”
“I'm sorry for moving away, when-”
“What?”
“I'm sorry for-”
“You can't promise that, hm? Look at me, Clara.” I did before I'd decided to. He groaned quietly and firmly massaged my g-spot. “Next time you ask for permission, come instead.”
Energy gathered and time froze for several long, blissful seconds. My head fell backwards as I arched my back. The orgasm started slowly, growing until it broke and rolled through my body. Quinn kept me anchored and still as I shivered through aftershocks.
“Can you come again?”
I laughed, barely through with the first one.
“Remember that you wanted this.” He bent me over the side of the couch and positioned himself behind me.
Five smacks fell heavily over the right side of my ass. I moaned when he pulled my hips back into his. He grabbed my neck and lowered my head, forcing my hips higher for his fast, hard thrusts. I smelled power and sex, hearing the slap of flesh hitting flesh. The continuous stimulation of my g-spot left me helpless to control when I'd reach the edge.
“I'm close, Sir. May I come?”
“Again, hm?”
My hips pushed back into his when he pulled away. He steadied me before I felt him smack the outside of my thigh. Pleasure had left me more vulnerable to pain, I lost track after ten. They fell too quickly for me to count.
“You know why, don't you?”
“Because I want you so much, Sir.” I stared at him, horrified. “Because I broke position, Sir? I'm so sorry I-”
“That was why.”
He went completely still. I braced for more pain. Instead of punishing me for my answer, he laughed quietly and put his hand on my wrists. I turned my face toward his neck, kissing and sucking gently before my teeth grazed over his skin. He raised my chin and kissed me as his hand covered my neck. I could feel how quickly my heart was beating, blood roaring in my ears. The head of his cock pushed inside of me. He fucked me harder, faster, his hands roving smoothly over my upper body. Pain fought to overwhelm pleasure when he pinched my nipples. The throbbing spread through my chest and into my lower body.
“Please, Sir, may I come?”
His hands covered my breasts, holding my back against his chest. He thrust more slowly and triggered the light internal fluttering.
“Yes,” he groaned roughly, feeling me clench down harder around his shaft. “Haven't I always let you come? Eventually?”
The involuntary spasms started and I writhed back into him, finding the pressure I needed. My clit rubbed across his shaft, the bursts of pleasure taking me higher. I was aware of how he was touching me, the couch and how it felt, but everything else faded away. When he pulled out, I knelt lower and immediately took his cock into my mouth. He came fast and hard, losing himself as I had. While he drifted, I let my back rest against the couch so I could kneel back.
Quinn helped me up and collapsed back onto the couch, taking me with him. I breathed him in, my head on his chest. “Thank you for letting me come, Sir.”
“You definitely did.”
“Yes,” I gratefully replied, “I definitely did.”
“That's good, because I really enjoyed going down on you.”
My clit twitched at his words and made me squirm. “Thank you for wanting to, Sir.”
“You've really never wanted it before?”
“I did, but, er-- Using toys hasn't ever failed...”
“Neither have I.” The way he grinned made me laugh. “I wasn't sure for a minute-- But then I realized why you were trying to bring your legs together.”
“Was that not good, Sir?”
“It was really good. Next time I'm going to tie you down so you can't.”
“Yes, please...”
“I know teasing isn't pleasurable for all women. Do you like it?” He saw my answer before I had to say anything. “For how long?”
“For however long you to have me wait, Sir.”
“That's a dangerous thing for you to say.”
The silence beat at me, but I knew my answer would be the same either way. “When I'm with you, or when I'm-”
He shook his head, no. “Just when you're here.”
“It's up to you, Sir, when I'm here.”
“I think it's time for a quick nap. What about you?”
“Are you tired?” I let myself feel it, happy to lay down with him.
“I want energy for tonight. We can hit Rack's later, if we have any left.”
“Left? After we do what?”
I felt him smile against my hair. “I'm going to fuck you before we leave. If we leave. I might just stay inside you until morning.”
- Chapter 11 -
~ The Longing For Detachment ~
“Nope, thanks, I don't need the shampoo.”
My shoulder collided with the side of his arm when I went to put it back. “Sorry about that. I'll let you shower first, next time.”
“Why?”
“Because I'm clumsy. There's plenty of room and I keep bumping into you.”
“You talk about knife-play like it's nothing, but showering with me makes you nervous?”
“I'm not-- It's not what I expected, Sir.” I smoothed my hands over his chest. “Doing things like this didn't factor into my when I find my Dominant thoughts.”
“Why not?”
“I wasn't really thinking beyond safe pain-play.”
“What do you want from a Dominant?” he asked carefully.
“... I'm not sure how to explain.”
The sharp glint in his eyes dimmed when he saw me looking at him. “Think about it. Let me know.”
It was a question I had avoided asking myself. I retreated deep into my head, leaning back against the wall. Water drops slid down over my skin in winding trails. When I breathed in, there was warm steam, colder air from space between the shower door and the tiled wall. The answer seemed simple, something that worried me.
“I've wanted pain from someone whose dominance is...” I sighed, suddenly feeling overwhelmed, “it's a deeper part of themselves, not a mask or role they hide behind.”
“That's what I've looked for in a submissive. You know,” he grinned, “I didn't mean 'Think about it now.'”
“Oh.” I crossed my arms, then brought them behind my back.
Realizing I had made me laugh and lean against him, my hands like claws behind his shoulders. How did he have me feel such submission to him? The strange surge of emotion leveled out, enabling me to gently draw my nails over his back.
“We don't really have pain sessions, Sir. They aren't timed or structured, so-”
“Do you want more warning or-- Sorry. You were saying?”
“You make it easy for me to stay submissive-minded.”
He finished rinsing his hair and held me closer, his arm firmly wrapped around my waist. “You're a very good submissive. We have, what, three rules?”
“I believe so, Sir? Use my safeword if I need to.”
“Yes, that's the most important one. The living room is neutral territory. Though, everywhere, really, is neutral territory at this point. You tell me when you need something. And you do it so well... No break to your submission.”
“Is that tiring for you, me staying sub-minded?”
“No, not at all. That's not something you need to worry about.”
I stroked my fingers over his his upper chest, chasing soap trails down his sides. Being sexually vulnerable to him wasn't difficult. His dominance demanded it, more every time he fucked me. I liked feeling safe enough to offer him more. Quinn had said he wanted to fuck me before we left.
“Would you like me to... do something for you, Sir?”
“Yes.” I melted into the skin-tingling warmth of his skin. He ground his hips against mine, pulling my head back so I couldn't kneel. “Not here. Finish up first, meet me in the bedroom.”
“I'll be quick.”
I watched him get out and an unexpected surge of lust took me by surprise. When he looked at me in the mirror, I smiled at him and let the curtain fall back where it was supposed to be. My mind blanked over. I really liked that there were two shower heads instead of just one.
Ah, the ability to think again. I turned the heat up and relaxed into the stinging that struck my front and back. It startled me that I didn't feel any differently. When I went into the bedroom, no restrictions would settle over me. The way Quinn inflicted pain left me stronger, happier, which was exactly what I had wanted a Dominant to do for me.
Learning to show emotional vulnerability would take time. I had never wanted to, and I didn't know how to begin. It was far simpler to live in the moment, to focus on how good he made me feel and what I wanted to do. What really frightened me, I thought like Lane for a moment, was that all the things I wanted to do with him would take time. Potentially, a lot of time.
Reaching for a towel, I dried off and saw the mirror clear. There were two small bruises on my right forearm. I smiled when I saw the three, straight red lines on my waist, left from having him grab my hips as he fucked me. They made me happy, too.
“Do you remember where I put my belt?” Quinn asked from the living room.
“Which one, Sir?”
“Leather, thicker on the outside. I was wearing it earlier, before we fell asleep.”
“The shiny one?”
I heard him scoff, “It's not shiny... there's a word for it, but I can't remember what it is.”
After wrapping my hair in the second towel he left for me, I went to help search. Quinn came out of his closet to lay a pair of black pants over a chair, a light gray suit shirt. The belt would match his shoes, both glossy black.
“Your dress belt, Sir?”
“... shiny's fine.”
I grinned, continuing to search. “I hung a dress up on the back of the door. Do you like it for the club?”
It was black, more elegant than vampy, though the upper half was a corset made of soft fabric. The neckline wasn't drastically low and the skirt part fell to the lower half of my thighs.
“I like it, yes. Why?”
“Because I'd wear something else if you don't?”
I saw his belt. Feeling that he was watching me, I got onto the bed and moved onto my hands and knees.
“You remember what I said about teasing, don't you?”
“Is this the belt you're looking for, Sir?” I assumed as much, anyway. It was caught on the upper right corner of his bed, hidden under two of the pillows.
He grinned when I looked over my shoulder at him. “It is, yes. Thank you.”
“I wasn't-”
“I know you weren't.” The hard edge of dominance was gone, replaced by amusement I didn't understand. “Don't get dressed yet.”
* * *
Two hours later, as we walked through Rack's double doors, I wanted him all over again. There was a different selection of bondage equipment on display, though I recognized X-frames and the bondage table from the night I'd gone with Lane. The two end alcoves that opened to the main room were, as always, only for people who wanted to play. Four long couches faced one another in the middle of the main room. Smaller single-sofa chairs were spaced out on the right and left of them. I recognized a few club regulars mingling together, a group that belonged to an online s/m community. Lane had enjoyed speaking with them. I did, too, though I didn't follow them around to their other meet-ups and events.
“What about here?” Quinn chose a sofa chair, surrounded by two on either side that weren't occupied.
“Wherever you want, ” I hesitated, seeing other submissives sitting with their Dominant partners, some kneeling next to them on the floor, a few restrained in simple bondage positions.
“Sit with me.” He had me straddle his waist. “I like it here. It's a lot less formal than I expected, though.”
“You look really good, Sir. There are other men here in suits.”
He put his hand on my wrists when I held them behind my back. “They weren't kidding about Pain Night. There's a lot going on.”
I watched as a bouncer turned two inebriated men away, a larger enforcer standing behind him. “Yes, Sir, there usually is. Earlier in the evening, things aren't so intense.”
“That reminds me, there have been so many distractions: Do you want a contract drawn up between us?”
“What would it say?”
“Basically, that you like pain, I like inflicting it. I'll take responsibility if anything happens, in any way I'm responsible for it happening. I can have one written up, with anything you want to add.”
“Whatever you want, Sir.”
“What do you want?”
“I don't need a contract. I can see why you'd want one, though.”
“Maybe not this time.”
“If there's ever an emergency, the hospital can contact my doctor. I found him through s/m channels. His practice understands the difference between pain-play and abuse, too.”
“I'm impressed. You did say you were serious about s/m. It's agreed then? There's no need for a contract?”
“We can forgo that hassle. I trust you, Sir.”
“You want me to inflict pain for you, here.”
“If you want to, Sir...”
“I'll have a pain session here with you, no matter what your answer is. Does that change your mind?”
“No, Sir.”
“I'm glad you trust me so much.”
I hugged him, not knowing what to say.
To our left, Dominants were using pain implements on submissives bound to the three pillars. An older, yet incredibly fit Dominant was using a bullwhip on his pretty, middle-aged female submissive. It made me too curious, and I wasn't sure I could take that kind of pain. At least, not so well as she did. I had a feeling I'd do more than flinch when it struck me. Another female submissive, curvier with bigger breasts, was restrained to a pillar with her arms above her head. She had her back arched so her chest was pushed forward. Chains attached the two sticks above and below her tongue to her silver nipple clamps. There was a flogger looped around her neck, a '5' in red lipstick on her chest. I didn't see anyone around her.
“What's got you so excited?” Quinn asked, feeling me grind my hips down over his.
“Almost everything, Sir? I don't want you to leave me for someone else to use, though.”
His eyebrow quirked slightly when he saw her. “That's not something I want to do.”
I looked behind me and immediately wrapped myself around him. “And that. Please no...”
A male submissive perched on a wooden horse. There was thin layer of leather padding on the smooth, wooden beam that he was straddling. His knees were bent and secured, ropes winding around his thighs and ankles to two of the four wooden legs that supported him. He ma
de intense pleasure-pain noises each time electricity clicked, loudly, from a two-pronged metal rod.
“If you liked electricity, we would definitely need a contract,” he said, seeing it spark. “I don't know anything about that.”
“That's really comforting, Sir.”
“Those two tables over there keep getting my attention. Come with me. Walk,” he said, seeing a female submissive crawl past us, a leash attached to an O-ring in her collar. “You don't need to crawl.”
“Thank you, Sir.”
He handed me his jacket when we reached the array of floggers, straps, canes, and bondage equipment. Lust swept over me as he unbuttoned his sleeves, rolling them up to expose the firm muscle in his forearms.
“We can use these?”
“Yes, Sir, but only two at a time.”
“Which two do you want me to use for you?”
“You had me decide about the contract. Whichever two you'd like to use-?”
Quinn chose two floggers, one with a crimson red handle and long, wide, black tails. The second was bright blue and black, it's tress the same colors. I liked that the whip's tails were thicker and more narrow than the first.
“You could draw blood with the second...”
“I know. How much do you trust me?”
“I trust you to use whatever you'd like, Sir.”
“We're not going to get crazy at a club.”
“Excuse me, sir?” An attendant handed him a pair of heavy-duty safety scissors. “You have to take a pair of these if you're going to be playing tonight. They'll cut through any of the ropes or restraints we have here.”
“I'm going to restrain her against that pillar there,” Quinn pointed. “They'll cut through the leather?”
“Of course, sir. You can leave them in one of those bins near the front, along with the floggers when you're done.”
“Thanks so much.” The scissors went into his suit shirt pocket. “Use your safeword if I don't see your signals. Answer so I know you understand me, Clara.”
“I understand. I'll use my safeword if I need to, Sir.”
“See that pillar, there, with the leather restraints attached to it?” He went over and leaned against it, looking sure when he stood straight again. I felt safer, realizing he had checked to make sure it was steady. “This is where I want you.”
Subfrenzy (the Subfrenzied Series) Page 12