by J. L. Murray
“Let me out, you son of a bitch!” Viv screamed at the window set in the iron door.
Conrad’s deformed face was grinning at her through the bars.
“You still don’t understand, Dr. White,” he said. “I’m not like the others.”
“You’re exactly like them,” she spat.
“Your friend there. Mr. Novak. He long vexed me. It took us a very long time to find him. Do you know why?”
“No.”
“Because he had help. An adversary of mine, you see. He’s a bit angry at me. But what Joshua Flynn most hates about me is how alike we are. Tell me, have you met Mr. Novak’s friend, Joshua Flynn?”
“He’s not his friend,” said Viv.
“That is why Mr. Novak is alive,” said Conrad. “Because he realizes that.”
“He’s barely alive because of you people.”
“And yet, you still risked your neck to save him. You humans are so...plucky. You know, I always suspected Mr. Novak. He came on our radar long before he went on the run. But you, Dr. White. Your treachery impresses me. You are so small, so afraid. When we met for the first time, I was reminded of a mouse, just shivering your way through life, avoiding the scary bits. When did you stop being terrified, Genevieve?”
“I never stopped,” she said, her honesty surprising even herself. “But some things are more important than fear.”
“Interesting,” said Conrad.
“Why didn’t you die?” she said.
He seemed to think about the question.
“I told you that Joshua Flynn and I were much alike,” he said. “And I meant it.” He opened his jaw wide and groaned and he began to change. His features changed, his teeth shrank into his mouth, his spine shortened and became more compact. Viv put her hand over her mouth as she watched. It was just like the girl, Sia, features turning and shifting into something all too human. Until the creature in front of her resembled a man. Someone you might nod to politely on the street. The man was handsome in an old-fashioned way, and Viv stared at him, appalled at his humanity. He had warm eyes and smiled a sweet smile with straight teeth.
“What is this?” she breathed. “What are you?”
“You didn’t see us when we first came,” he said, giving her a pitying look. “At least, that you can remember. It was so easy, Dr. White. We all looked just like you. Just some other frightened humans. Until the moment when we were not. We pulled down our masks and there were monsters underneath. You should have seen your faces! It was an easy thing, really, to manipulate you all. Take away the lights, the phones, the internet. And when it comes back, you just accept whatever was to come. The Slack helped. You were all so hooked on it. We hardly had to bend your minds at all. But I remember you, Dr. White. I remember how you fought. You were never on the Slack, were you? Not even once.”
Viv felt herself go very still.
“You remember me from where?” said Viv.
“I had to take those memories, so sadly, you didn’t remember. Though if I’d left them it would have broken you. As it is, you’re only cracked.”
“What are you talking about?” said Viv. “Where do you know me from?”
“Do you want to remember?” he said. “I was only going to feed on you, but you are far too much fun.”
“Remember what?” said Viv. Her heart was pounding as she looked at this human man. He looked just like everyone else.
“I think you know,” he said. “Do you really want to know what happened to your son? Would it give you pleasure to know the horrors that you’ve really endured?”
“How do you know?” she said, something hot and white behind her eyes. It was something new for her. Not grief or panic or despair. It was a sharp, hot anger, so intense it felt painful. She felt as though it was filling her up. This anger felt different than when she tainted the blood. That felt more like duty than anger. No, what she was feeling now was far stronger. It was rage.
“There it is,” said Conrad, smiling with his perfect teeth. “There’s the woman I remember. So human, that rage.”
“You were there,” said Viv. “You were in my house. Why were you there? You told them all to stop killing people. You made them weak.”
“Yes, so hypocritical of me,” said Conrad. “I always liked Philadelphia. I was a young man here, you know. I consider it my home. So it seemed only right to come here during the Blackout. Do you want to know? I can make you remember. It’s only a veil, really. All I have to do is lift it. Your memories are all still there. That’s why you could never forget. Your mind knew what happened, you just couldn’t access it.”
“You were there,” Viv said again, going over that night in her head. “You were there when he disappeared. You were there when my life ended.”
“And I was the one who ended it. Come. Remember.”
“Is he dead?” she said.
“You’ll never know until you see.”
Viv took a step toward him. Conrad smiled. He motioned her forward. She could already feel him in her head, a pressure and a willingness to comply that was unfamiliar to her. And then she had her face against the bars and Conrad put his hand on her forehead. A sharp pain made her open her mouth in a silent scream, a scream that would never come. Her vision went white, and then she broke right down the middle. From one memory and then all the way through.
Viv could see it. She’d been holding a knife that night, a long sharp knife that could slice through anything. They had come in the dark, where she held Hunter tight against her body. So tight he started to cry. And then the monsters came.
It wasn’t like she thought it would be. It wasn’t loud, there was no maniacal laughter and no screaming. Only her own. Hunter hadn’t screamed. Not even a whimper. It had been too fast and when Viv realized her baby wasn’t in her arms, she flailed. She came at the dark figures in the night, in the night that was too dark. She came at them with the knife and something dropped from their arms.
Something came into view, a face. But a horrible face, with a mouth like a wound and teeth like knives. Like the knife she held. It was wet now, dripping with something. And on the floor…Oh, God, on the floor…
Viv fell to her knees, the rage gone. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak. She could only hear Conrad’s voice, crooning to her.
“I felt pity for you. You were the first human I had ever felt such a thing for. I’ve always been a killer. I don’t drag it out, and I don’t make them suffer. But you were special, Genevieve. So fierce and full of rage in that moment. And I saw you break. We weren’t going to kill him, you know. We were only going to keep him safe. With the others.”
“I killed him,” she whispered. “I killed my baby. I killed him, I killed him.”
“I told you it would hurt,” said Conrad. There was a click as he turned the key and the door swung ajar, bumping gently against Viv’s knees.
She looked up at him.
“I killed him,” she said, trying to breathe. “All this time. It was me.”
“Yes,” said Conrad, not without sympathy.
“Will you kill me?” she said. “Please?”
Conrad smiled sadly.
“I’ll do better,” he said. “I can make it all go away. All that emotion, all tangled up like a ball of twine, filling up your guts and your mind and your heart. Would you like me to stop it? Would you like it to go away?”
Viv felt as though she was filling up, expanding with the horror of what she knew. Of what she had done. All this time. All this time. It was her. Her own child, and the knife…
She put her hands over her chest to try to stop the pain.
“I’m breaking apart,” she gasped.
Conrad was next to her now, crouching down, gathering her up. She pressed her face into his soft jacket and the grief took over. She couldn’t move as he lifted her up.
“Take it away,” she whimpered. “Make it stop.”
“Are you sure?” he said.
“Please,” she said, the word sou
ndless but on her lips. “Please.”
“It would be my pleasure,” said Conrad. And they were moving down the hall now, the lights overhead a blur of brightness. Viv closed her eyes against them.
“You see,” said Conrad, as they turned a corner. “You may have stopped my experiment before, but now you will be the experiment, my esteemed doctor. You shouldn’t worry. I’ve learned my lesson. The pain isn’t the important thing, the result is. You’ll be sedated and when you wake up, you won’t feel a thing. Won’t that be lovely? I know what went wrong last time. It was the blood. All in the blood. We used the wrong kind of blood, because it was the new Revenant blood. I can fix it. I can fix it with my own blood. Ancient blood. It’s strong, and you’ll be strong too.”
“I killed him,” Viv said.
“Yes you did,” said Conrad. “And you’ll be killing many more.”
“I don’t want to feel,” said Viv.
“You won’t feel a thing, my dear,” said Conrad. He held her tighter. “And it’s only the beginning.”
Thirty-Four
Sia rose from the dead man, the taste of him on her lips. Her face shifted again and she screamed anew, the pain fresh. She had strength now, but she couldn’t stop her own body. She began walking, holding the wall for support, so she didn’t topple over from the pain. She knew where to go. She could feel him now, just outside the gates.
She stopped and looked down at herself. Her ribcage was still open, her beautiful heart beating in an empty wound. How was she alive? She could see blood still dripping down the front of her, her once-white dress soaked in red. Not all of it was hers. She could feel Mathilde inside of her, guiding her, making her strong. Sia felt her teeth sliding out again and she touched them this time. So long and smooth and sharp. She could feel the strength in those teeth, in the horrible things they were capable of. If she could just control them.
Each step was agony, but she pushed herself on. She’d almost lost her voice from screaming. She came to her room, but she kept walking. And when she came to the locked double doors, she shoved them open and felt the lock splintering metal. Her features shrunk down to human again as she walked through the hospital where she had been a prisoner. Her warden, Evelyn Hauser, was nowhere to be seen.
Sia made her way to a door opposite the nursing station. This was the door the Movers used to enter, and the nurses used to leave. She pushed, but the door was unlocked and swung open easily. Sia went down the stairs, leaning against the wall occasionally, leaving a trail of blood on the white tile. She followed the lights down the hall until she came to a large door marked “EXIT.”
Sia felt her teeth come out as she pushed the door, and it toppled off its hinges and fell sideways into the snow. Sia stepped outside and closed her eyes at the cold. The heat that had been setting her on fire seemed manageable now. She stood, the snow melting around her thighs, and let the cold seep into her. Felt the snow melt on her face and in her hair. She felt the wind blowing on her bare heart and she smiled around her sharp teeth as she began to walk barefoot through the snow. She changed again and the pain brought her to her knees. So much power and she was wasting it. Sia ground her human teeth together in frustration, but then her Rev teeth forced her mouth open and she pushed herself forward in the snow.
When she saw him, walking through the gate, Sia paused. She stood still as a stone and watched him stop, too.
“Are you real?” Sia said, her voice husky from screaming.
“I’m real,” said Joshua Flynn, his voice cracking. “I heard you call.”
He was at her side then and Sia felt everything melt away. His hands, so warm once, felt cold now on her hot flesh.
“Sia…” He picked her up as she fell, cradling her in his arms, an odd sound coming from his chest. “Sia, what did they do to you?”
“I’ve never seen you cry,” she said.
“Sia…”
She smiled then and touched his face. She shook her head sadly.
“You were too late, Joshua. You were supposed to come. I called and called.”
“I was coming for you,” he said, something desperate in his voice, a grief so deep that it made him seem small. “I was coming to take you away, whether you hated me for it or not.”
“Can you see my heart? Isn’t it pretty?”
“Sia…”
“Joshua, it hurts. My face, my bones. You have to end it. You have to kill me.”
“No,” he said. Sia felt his tears falling on her face. “I’m going to fix you.”
“Not like this, Joshua. Kill me, please. If you love me, you must end it. I have their sickness inside of me. Please.”
“Sia, I can’t. I won’t. I can fix this.”
“No…”
“Do you trust me?”
“Yes,” she answered without hesitation.
“Then let me fix you. This is what we always planned, remember? It’s what you were always going to be.”
“My daughter…”
“First, you must survive, Sia. It’s the only way. I’ll never kill you, do you understand? I won’t hurt you.” He put a finger to her lips and it tasted of blood. Sia felt tears freezing to her cheeks.
“You’re too late,” she said. “It hurts already.”
“Not for long.”
Sia watched his face. His dark eyes, capable of so much death, pleaded with her. His expression was one that Sia had never seen before. He looked vulnerable. How could he be a monster and look so lost and pained? How could she be a monster with him at her side?
“I will consent,” she said at last. “Fix me, my love.”
“Yes.”
“And then we’ll kill them all,” she said, gasping as her bones began to shift.
“Yes,” he said.
He began to lead her back toward the hospital.
“No,” Sia whispered. “I’m on fire.”
“I’m not going to speak false to you,” he said. “I am going to have to hurt you.”
“Yes,” she said. “In the snow. Please. I’m burning up.”
Joshua set her down gently in a snowbank like a bride he was taking to bed. She felt herself melt into the drift, her body cooling as steam rose up around her. Her new heart was beating fiercely.
“Something went wrong, they said. Something with the surgery.”
“Surgery,” he said scornfully. “How very scientific.”
“They love their needles and their scalpels.”
“It is empty,” he said. “Cold and without beauty. There is beauty in the blood, in the pain. There is such infinite beauty in the darkness. Conrad has taken that from them. He has turned them into husks.”
“They want to live in the light,” said Sia.
“It is not our nature to live in the light.”
“The darkness suits you,” she said.
“Why didn’t you run, Sia?” he said. He was taking off his shirt, his skin pale in the snow-light. “Why didn’t you call me?”
“I called you,” she said. “But it was too late. There was a party, Joshua.”
“It was a festival,” he said. “It’s our way. Before someone changes.”
“It was a surprise,” she said.
He was quiet for a long time. When he spoke, his voice was quiet.
“Are you ready?”
Sia watched him change, watched his face flatten and his spine lengthen. She touched his teeth, his face. He closed his eyes. He was a gorgeous, dark thing. All sharp teeth and claws and eyes so deep they cut you. Sia gave a breathy gasp despite herself. This was no weak creature with soft skin and fancy clothes. Her Joshua was power. He was danger. He was hers. And soon she would be his forever.
“I’m ready,” she said.
“They’ve put their blood into you,” he said. “Into this heart. I have to get it out. It’s poisoning you.”
“I killed a man in the hall,” she said. “I think I killed him. He wasn’t moving.”
“Oh?”
“I liked
it.” She looked at him. “Will you still love me when I’m a monster, Joshua?”
“Until the end of time.”
“Do it.”
She screamed again as she felt his teeth sink into her heart, and felt the fire being pulled out. The shifting stopped and her bones settled. Joshua gasped and Sia heard a ripping sound. The very wind seemed to stop as she felt something warm being poured into her chest, her heart. She felt the light inside her grow brighter. Sia cried out one last time as Joshua pushed her ribcage back together. The snow dwindled and then stopped falling altogether as he brought the open vein in his arm to her lips. She drank, feeling herself growing strong, the wounds of the past hours closing up and her skin growing fresh and new, as though she had never been hurt. All that remained was her memory, the sound of Mathilde’s screams still in her ears. And an aching hunger. The clouds parted and a full moon shone upon her, born anew.
Sia reached up to run her fingers through the particles in the frigid night air. The moonlight reflected off her skin as though she glowed. She felt each snowflake when she touched the snow around her. She could see the light in Joshua’s chest as he stood looking at her, his own heart throbbing with such ferocity that she was sure it would pound through his skin. It matched her own and Sia stood, the dress sticking to her with blood. Slipping it off, she smiled at Joshua and kissed his lips, letting her naked skin soak up the moonlight.
“I’m going to play music as I kill them,” Sia said.
“I would expect no less,” said Joshua. And when he kissed her back, Sia could taste everyone he’d ever drunk from. Everyone he’d killed, everyone he’d had mercy on. Sia licked his lips. There would be no mercy tonight, she could see that in Joshua’s eyes.
“They have my daughter,” said Sia. “She will be the only survivor.”
“Everyone that touched you is mine,” Joshua said, his voice husky.
“Not yours,” said Sia. “Ours. My Joshua. It’s so very good to see you.”
Thirty-Five
Dez woke up in a hospital bed, his neck an explosion of pain. He sat up and fought back the nausea. He had tubes in his arm, clear liquid going in through an IV. He could feel the coolness entering his vein. Dez frowned. Tubes going in instead of out. That was different.