Heart of a Commander [Daughters of Lyra Series]

by Felicity Heaton

  He cursed under his breath and let his control slip.

  Right or no right, he would have her.

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  Chapter 2

  Amerii sat patiently between the two escorts as the small shuttle docked with the Varkan vessel. Nerves fluttered in her stomach at the thought of seeing him face to face again. Van. Count of Aeris. Apparently a commander too. She smiled inside at this twist of fate and thanked Iskara for his helping hand.

  The shuttle jerked her. A clunk and a hiss announced that they had docked. One of the escorts left them and she looked at the other one. He was wearing his visor so she couldn't see his expression but she could tell from the compressed line of his lips that he wasn't the talkative type. The other one she had met at Sophia's wedding had been like him.

  Amerii had decided back then that there were two types of Varkan. The talkative and the non-talkative. Sirus had been silent, composed, distant almost. She hadn't seen him speak to anyone except the Varkans. Regis had been amiable, smiling and the centre of attention, which she had expected since it had been his wedding. Van had been, well, she didn't quite know where to place him. He had talked and laughed well enough with Regis and Sophia, and even Sophia's family and some of the other guests.

  With her, he had been different. He had hovered somewhere in between the talkative and non-talkative personalities she had assigned all Varkans. There had been moments when he had smiled at her, laughed at something she had said, or said something amusing himself. But there had also been times when he had fallen quiet and simply looked at her. Those were the times that she remembered most. She remembered the dark red of his eyes as they had held her captivated, unable to look away. They had shown her something that stayed with her.

  A hunger that made a shiver bolt down her spine and her whole body come alive.

  After the wedding, she had spoken to Sophia about it. Sophia had given her the information pads on Varka that she had received from Regis and had told her that Varkans had something called bloodlust and because of that bloodlust they kept a tight rein on their feelings.

  It was then that Amerii had decided her two types of Varkan were wrong. It wasn't that one was talkative and the other not. It was that one was willing to relinquish a little control, enough to be amiable while still controlling their bloodlust, and one wasn't willing.

  Regis had accepted lack of control and had found another way of controlling his hunger. Van had only been able to do it for short periods. Since he had spoken to her the longest, she had seen the result of that, the change between his amiable side and his hunger. The other one, Sirus, hadn't relinquished one iota of control.

  For some reason that frightened her.

  Just as the man opposite did.

  Was he unwilling to relinquish control because he didn't want to feel, or because he feared his bloodlust would be too strong to contain should he feel?

  She was thankful when the other man returned and announced that it was safe to exit the shuttle. Standing, she fixed her appearance, took a deep breath and then nodded to the two men. Both stared at her, their hands held in tight fists at their sides. For a moment, she thought that she was going to have a problem and then they turned and led the way through the shuttle.

  Amerii's heart pounded. It probably wasn't a good idea to let it go unchecked. Her nerves could be affecting the Varkans. They would be able to hear her heartbeat. It might bring out their bloodlust. She cursed Van for choosing her to come to the ship and sign the declaration but at the same time thanked him for showing her the respect so few did, and for giving her a chance to see him again.

  Stepping out of the vessel, she nodded when her two escorts bowed and left. The docking level was enormous. She had been too full of nerves to look out of the window during the flight. From the size of this deck, the ship had to dwarf her own vessel.

  "Your highness,” a familiar male voice said, its timber deep and warm, laced with a slight echo.

  A blush touched her cheeks as she bowed her head and closed her eyes in greeting. It had been a long time since someone had referred to her as royalty. She never had been able to get used to it. She was happiest just being Lieutenant Amerii.

  Although Captain Amerii sounded far better.

  "Count of Aeris,” she said and rose, her eyes coming up to meet his. He still wasn't wearing his visor.

  Her heart thudded against her chest. He was as handsome as ever, his beauty otherworldly when combined with his incredible dark red irises. His hair had grown long, tied back at the nape of his neck, and she swore he was taller than she remembered. He stood almost a head taller than she did.

  "Call me Van.” He swept his arm out to one side, a smile curving his deliciously kissable lips.

  Iskara must have made him to tempt her. She had never witnessed such perfection. Not even on Lyra Prime or Lyra Six. Her mouth turned dry when she thought about Lyra Six, one of the universe's foremost pleasure planets, and looked at Van. Females of mating age would flock to the planet if he were working there.

  She would be there every day, all day.

  "Protocol dictates that as an envoy of Lyra, I—"

  "I insist,” he said, his voice firm enough that she felt that insistence. He wasn't going to take no for an answer.

  "Then I insist that you call me Amerii,” she replied and he looked uncomfortable. She added, “Or at least Lieutenant Amerii. I am not royalty when I am serving Lyra after all."

  "You are not?” He frowned, as though he couldn't bring himself to believe it. It was part truth and a lot lie. While she was on her ship, she wasn't royalty. She was the rank assigned to her. While off the ship or onboard any other vessel of non-Lyran ownership, she was royalty. He didn't need to know that though. She couldn't have him calling her ‘highness’ all the time. She liked the way her name sounded on his lips. The slight echo and hunger that he said it with made her flushed with heat.

  She nodded.

  He stared at her, deep red eyes mesmerising her, and the universe fell suddenly silent and seemed incredibly warm. Her heart pounded steadily, a beat that she breathed to, her lips parted. Her mouth felt dry again. A small gasp escaped her when his eyes lightened for a brief flash and then darkened again.

  Sophia had warned her about that.

  Bloodlust.

  Her pulse quickened.

  "We are ready for you,” Van said and Amerii swallowed hard, unable to tear her eyes away from his. He helped her by turning his back to her and striding towards a door in the far corner of the deck.

  Clearing her throat, she hurried after him, struggling to swallow her heart back down again. Her hands trembled as she tugged at the hem of her jacket, nerves getting the better of her. Her father would scold her for being so weak. He had raised her to be strong like him. She normally was. For some reason, Van made her edgy, and it wasn't because she was frightened.

  In fact, it was something other than fear or concern. She trembled for another reason.

  When he looked at her like that, as though he wanted to devour her, as though she made him lose control, she found herself wanting him to.

  She found herself wanting him.

  All that hunger and desire directed at her made her blood burn.

  Van paused at the door and turned to face her. When he smiled, she saw his teeth, saw his pointed canines gleam in the dim light. The sight of them sent a shiver of anticipation through her followed by a flash of a fantasy. She had dreamt about those teeth.

  She had dreamt about being with him, their naked bodies entwined, and his fangs in her throat.

  Heat suffused her body and she tingled with the prickly warmth of desire. It swept over her skin, making her clothes feel too tight and restrictive. She swallowed to clear her dry throat and tugged at her clothes to relieve herself of their irritation.

  "Is something the matter?” Van said as he stepped up to her, looking down into her eyes, close enough that she longed to reach out and place her hand again
st his broad chest.

  She ached to step into his arms, wrap hers around his neck, and bring his mouth down for a kiss that would be the undoing of them both.

  She coughed and shook her head.

  "Maybe I'm coming down with something,” Amerii muttered, thinking it was a reasonable excuse for her fluctuating heartbeat, blazing cheeks and trembling.

  Van moved closer, his eyebrows knit tight, dark lines against his moon-white skin.

  "Then I will have quarters arranged so you may rest once the declaration is signed."

  Amerii shook her head, her eyes wide. Staying on the ship was a bad idea. Being close to Van was a bad idea.

  "I don't want to be an inconvenience, really. I can sign it and then hop back to my ship and rest there."

  "I insist,” he whispered.

  Amerii found herself dazed and nodding in agreement as she stared at the beautiful bow of his lips.

  He insisted after all. He seemed to insist a lot. Could she become insistent too? Did it work both ways? If she insisted that he kissed her, would he?

  She was royalty after all and he seemed to place great importance on that.

  Did that mean he would do as she had asked or refuse because she was royalty?

  By the time she had come out of her thoughts, he had moved away and was waiting by the open door. She went to him, her gaze skimming over the knee length black jacket he wore. It was almost as snug as hers was. It fitted tightly across his chest and dipped in at his waist before flaring out into loose tails. He had been wearing something similar last time she had seen him. His polished black knee high boots matched her own.

  When she reached him, he moved on, leading the way through the ship. She tried to think of something to talk about but failed. He had already told her that Sophia and the children were doing well.

  Younglings he had called them. They had inherited their father's traits, which she knew was a delicate way of saying that they too had bloodlust, fangs and red eyes. She wished she could see them and Sophia. She longed to hold them before they grew. She had never held a baby before but whenever her mother spoke about the day that she had been born, it sounded magical. Perhaps it had to be your own child to experience such a wonderful feeling. She glanced at Van again.

  His gaze slid to meet hers but he said nothing. Their eyes remained locked as they walked and she wondered if he felt the same as she did. Did a jolt run through him whenever their eyes met? Did he think about her? Did he dream of her?

  Amerii couldn't stop dreaming of him—fantasies so wild that she woke in a sweat with her heart thundering. Several times the brainwave monitors on the panel beside her bed had reported unusual neural activity and had suggested she report to the medical officer. She had ignored it every time. She really didn't want to sit with the doc and explain to him that she was having highly charged erotic dreams about a man she had only met once.

  "Is Regis well?” she said to break the silence.

  Van turned his head fully to face her. “He is well and enjoying some time with his family. The whole of Varka Prime has been celebrating their birth for many months now."

  "Is that usual?” She hadn't read anything about royal births. The Varkans placed such importance on royalty that perhaps it was normal. On Lyra Prime, they only celebrated a royal child's birth for one day.

  He nodded. “It will most likely continue until they have had their first feed."

  She frowned and then her eyes widened when she realised that he was talking about blood.

  "How will they know?” She was pleased that she had him talking but, at the same time, she wished that she didn't have to ask so many questions. She was beginning to sound ignorant about Varka and she didn't want him to think that was the case. She thought about impressing him with her knowledge of Varka and his species but decided against it. Looking like a swot probably wouldn't get her anywhere either.

  "The first feed is public."

  "Oh,” she said with raised eyebrows. They were going to feed the younglings in public. “I think I remember reading something about this."

  It was Van's turn to frown and he stopped walking, moving to face her. “You do?"

  Amerii smiled nervously, hoping that she remembered it right so he would continue to be so impressed. “Yes ... younglings of the royal family are fed from their father first, aren't they? It's something about strengthening their blood so they ... live forever."

  "You paused,” Van said and stepped up to her. “You paused before speaking of eternity."

  "It's just ... it's a strange concept to me,” she said, her eyebrows raised and an embarrassed smile tugging at her lips. “Lyrans live a long time, but to live forever..."

  Van raised his hand as though to touch her and then lowered it again. “I can understand it would be difficult to comprehend. Sophia shares Regis's immortality now. He has gifted it to her."

  "Are you ... I mean, is every Varkan immortal?"

  "It is not true immortality.” His look softened. “We live many times longer than any other species that we have met and can give a member of another species the ability to also."

  The way his dark pupils narrowed on hers made her heart thunder.

  "Regis made Sophia live forever ... will she need to—” Amerii cut herself off, afraid to ask about blood in case she offended Van. She knew that Varkans believed the universe saw them as monsters for their feeding habits. It was probably unwise to mention it. She didn't want to shatter this sense of ease between them.

  "She will not need blood. The eternal kiss only grants her a longer life. She is unchanged. You need not fear for your friend.” His voice held darkness that said the sense of ease between them had already been shattered.

  "I don't!” she said quickly, cursing him for thinking that she was frightened of his kind or anything they could do. His right eyebrow quirked. “I just ... I find it ... fascinating."

  His other eyebrow joined it and he stared at her so intently that her cheeks coloured under the scrutiny.

  "Fascinating,” he whispered, as though tasting the word, savouring it. “You find my species interesting?"

  Amerii nodded and cast her gaze downwards, looking at her boots. His appeared in view, the toe of them incredibly close to hers. His hand rose and he placed the backs of his fingers under her chin. The soft brush of them made warm tingles dance down her neck. She followed his silent command when he brought his hand up and raised her chin. Her eyes met his and she nibbled her lower lip when she found him smiling at her. Her body mourned the loss of contact when he released her chin and she barely stopped herself from showing it.

  "You do not fear us, as your captain does?"

  Her eyes widened. He had noticed her captain's fear just as she had during their journey here. Half of the crew feared Varkans and didn't want to be working with them.

  She shook her head. “I have no reason to fear you."

  His smile widened and a glimmer of bright red flashed across his eyes. “There are reasons you should fear me."

  Her chest heaved with her breathing and her throat felt tight. She held his gaze, desperate to show him that what he spoke of didn't frighten her either. Sophia had told her about what had happened when Regis had been in the grip of his bloodlust. He hadn't hurt her. It was only others that needed to fear him.

  Just as it would be only others who would need to fear Van.

  He wouldn't hurt her.

  At least that was what she told herself.

  "Not you ... others perhaps,” she said, “but not you. I have no reason to fear you."

  He tilted his head to one side, his dark gaze penetrating hers. She continued to hold it to show him that she was telling the truth—she had no reason to fear him. He really didn't frighten her.

  "I am pleased to hear that,” he said and then looked to his left. She looked there too and saw the two escorts had rejoined them.

  Van held his hand out, intimating the door. Stood just inside the room were two young females.
They were beautiful, their pale faces framed by long soft black waves of hair. Their deep red eyes were rimmed with black, their long lashes making Amerii envious of their looks. They nodded to her and then looked to Van. Van said something she didn't understand and the two women smiled and nodded again.

  Amerii's feelings moved beyond envy to jealousy, especially when Van continued to look at them for long seconds.

  "We are ready for you,” the women said in unison and bowed.

  Amerii swallowed her anger and all feelings with it. She had been foolish to let herself get caught up in Van. He wasn't the reason that she was here and she shouldn't have let herself behave so openly with him. His easy conversation and manner with her had probably been the result of him taking his cue from her and not because he liked her in anyway.

  He was Varkan.

  She was Lyran.

  It was best she remembered that and why she was here.

  She had a duty to do, a task befitting of royalty, and she was going to do it well and get back to her ship.

  Amerii walked into the room, sat in the chair that the two beautiful females drew out for her, and stared at the contract. She read every word that was written in her own tongue, ignoring the Varkan translation. It seemed fair enough to her. They could create a base station on Varka Two but ownership of the planet remained with Varka.

  With a trembling hand, she picked up the electronic quill, and again swallowed her feelings. Her duty here was to Lyra, not to her heart, no matter how much it protested and tried to make her change her mind.

  She signed the space below the Lyran translation.

  Princess Amerii Lyra.

  That was who she was. It was foolish to let herself get caught up in a fantasy. Her dreams of Van were just that—dreams. They weren't reality. She didn't know him and he certainly didn't know her. She frowned at the contract, wondering what was wrong with her. Was this all jealousy speaking or were there other emotions at play too?

  Disappointment.

  That one rung truest of all.

  She had been starting to think that Van might like her, that his words about her being frightened of him had been because he felt a hunger for her and desired her blood. The two females now flanking her were a reality check that she had badly needed. She realised now that she had been wrong.