by Amy Gamet
A quick search turned up a video, and he watched it with the sound turned off. This was not helping his erection go down. “I found a video on YouTube that might help.”
“Let me see it.”
He handed her the phone. She watched for a few minutes, then went back to the bathroom.
It seemed like she was gone forever. Finally, he knocked on the door. “Any luck?”
“Go away.”
“Is it working?”
“Leave me alone.”
He walked back to his bed, but instead of lying down, he began to pace. A long while later, the bathroom door opened.
She handed him his phone.
“Did it work?”
“Yes.”
He smiled. “Glad I could help.”
“Shut up, Matteo.”
He closed his mouth and spread out on his bed. “What’s the matter?” She was quiet so long, he thought she wasn’t going to answer.
“I’m embarrassed.”
You don’t have anything to be embarrassed about.”
“Not about this. About earlier. When I threw myself at you and you pushed me away.”
He sat up. “Because I want you, not because I don’t.”
“God, please don’t lie to me, Matteo.”
“I’m not lying.”
“Of course you are. I’m fat from the pregnancy and my boobs are swollen and leaky and sore and disgusting. I’m covered in stretch marks. I’m not exactly pinup material, so let’s not pretend.”
“You’re beautiful.”
“Right.”
He moved to her bed, sitting on the edge beside her. “You’re curvy in all the right places, just like a woman should be. And those swollen, leaky breasts of yours are pretty amazing. They take care of your son, and I, for one, can’t stop staring at them.”
“You watch me in the mirror.”
“Yes. I can’t stop.”
“I like it when you watch me.”
His gaze dropped slowly down her neck to the open bodice of her shirt and lower, taking in her full breasts and remembering every curve and shadow. “I can’t stop. I have to look at you. Stare at you.”
The tension in the room thickened, the rapid beat of his pulse in his ear like a drumbeat.
This was dangerous territory. He knew when they got to this room tonight that he was powerless to control his reaction to this woman, and now the beast in himself was coming unleashed, the beast that needed to possess her. There would be no substitutions for the real thing tonight.
“I need you, Grace.”
Her voice was quiet. “I need you, too.”
“Come here.”
She moved to the bed and he pulled her down, rolling on top of her. His hand pushed her knee away from its mate, and he settled himself between her legs. This was where he belonged. It was what they both wanted.
He took her mouth in a passionate kiss and his hips ground against hers, his erection pressing against her. He braced himself above her and hovered on the brink of no return as she moaned with every shove of his hips as if he were already inside her.
His motions were more deliberate now, designed to please her body, and he listened to her breathing alternate between pants and holding her breath. He was going to make her come just like this, with his hands and the pressure of his body on hers.
She was coming apart beneath him, lifting her hips off the bed to meet his thrusts as she pushed her head back against the pillow and called out. He could feel himself climbing, too, and he thrust harder and faster against her softness.
She wrapped her legs around his hips and the sound she was making changed.
“Come for me, Gracie. Just like that.”
Her mouth hung open as she cried out, the crest of her climax overtaking her. He had to be inside her now, had to feel her clenching around him, and he stripped off his pants and briefs.
But Grace had ideas of her own, and she rolled on top of him, holding his wrists above his head before letting go and making her way down his body with kisses. She wrapped her hands around his cock and took him in her mouth as a guttural cry came from deep in his chest.
Then she was sucking him, licking him with her tongue and taking him deep. He couldn’t take much more of this. Her hands came around his ass and held him to her as her fingernails dug into his buttocks.
She came up for air, panting. “Come in my mouth.”
That’s when he realized she was doing this for him, taking the choice of sleeping together out of the equation. Then her mouth was on him again and he let himself climb higher, thrusting deeply into her hot little mouth, her eager wetness pulling at him stroke after stroke until he cried out in his release.
She lapped softly at him, her tongue caressing his shaft as aftershocks racked his body.
When she curled up at his side, it was all he could do to lift his arm around her and gently rub her back. He kissed her hair, loving the heady scent of her on the air. “Thank you.”
She kissed his chest. “Thank you.”
He drifted off to sleep.
26
Matteo stabbed an egg with his fork, the yolk running across his plate in a bright yellow pool. “I used to steal things when I was younger. My mama worked nights and I got mixed up with some kids who made bad choices, so I decided I would be cool if I made bad choices, too.”
Grace took a sip of her coffee. “What kind of things did you steal?”
“Anything the older kids told me to. I stole a car when I was twelve and got caught. I didn’t drive so well. I walked the straight and narrow after that. We moved to a new neighborhood, and my mama started working while I was at school so she could keep tabs on me the rest of the time.”
“But they let you enlist in the military after stealing a car?”
“I had to get a waiver. I was a juvenile, but it was a felony. They could have turned me away.”
“And what would you have done instead?”
He laughed. “Let’s just say I was praying real hard to get in. The Navy gave me a good life. A better life than I knew how to get on my own.”
They’d ordered room service, and Matteo’s antibiotics had been delivered an hour before.
“I guess we should hit the road,” he said.
Grace was quiet on the drive home. She was happier than she could remember being in months, aside from the happiness she experienced around her son. But as a woman, as just herself, this was definitely the best she could remember feeling in a very long time.
She snuck a sideways glance at Matteo as he drove. How would the night they spent together affect their relationship going forward? She wasn’t foolish enough to think this meant he had feelings for her. Clearly, what they had experienced was mutual physical attraction. But she liked Matteo, and it just so happened he was married to her, at least for the time being.
Don’t go thinking of him like he’s actually your husband.
Yes, that was dangerous indeed. He was a paid employee. It would be good for her if she remembered that.
“You’re awfully quiet,” said Matteo.
“So are you.”
“Fair enough. I’ve been watching traffic to make sure we’re not being followed. You’re anxious to get back to the baby, I assume.”
“Oh, of course.” His comment reminded her of their sexual antics. She’d been so brazen. What must he think of her now? “I didn’t expect any of this to happen.”
“Neither did I.” He was quiet for a moment. “Are you sorry?”
“No. Are you?” She’d just had another man’s child. She wouldn’t blame him if he was.
He reached out and took her hand. “It doesn’t have to mean anything more than you want it to,” he said.
She shook her head. “These last weeks have been surreal in every way.” Now he was taking a step back, giving her the option of starting fresh when they got back.
Did she want to take it?
The idea left her feeling sad. For while she knew she
shouldn’t pursue a relationship with Matteo, she knew she would miss him if she didn’t.
“I don’t know what I want,” she said. “I wish I could give you a more definitive answer.”
“As long as you don’t have any regrets, that’s good enough for me.”
Regrets.
This last year had left her with a few of them. She couldn’t completely wish away her relationship with Mason, as he had given her Nico. But so many of her choices had strained her already rocky relationship with her father.
“Where did you go?” asked Matteo.
“I was thinking about my father. We’ve always had our differences, but lately it seems like that’s all we have. When my mother was alive, she was the go-between, always making sure we found a way to get along, even work together. Since she passed away, we can’t seem to have a decent conversation without assuming the other one has terrible intentions.”
She looked down at her ring, still not used to seeing it on her finger, and twirled the gold against her skin. “She would be sad to see what things are like now. This is definitely not what she wanted for us.”
“If you don’t mind me saying so, it doesn’t seem to be what you want, either.”
“No. It’s not. In a perfect world, I wish I had a father I could talk to, who enjoyed my company and didn’t think I was a walking disaster. But I can’t control other people, and me wishing for it won’t ever make it happen.”
“What if I told you I thought he wished for the same things?”
“Are you his confidant now?”
“No, but he did share with me enough to make me realize he cares about you very much.”
Her eyes stung. Her father would never tell her himself that he cared for her, and it had been many years since her mother had done it for him. “Do you really think so?”
“You should talk to him. Life is short, Grace.”
“What about you? Do you get along with your parents?”
“It’s just me and my mom. But yes, we do. She’s only fifteen years older than me, so we have a different relationship than a lot of people do with their parents.”
“What about your father?”
“I never met him.”
“Just like Nico will never know his. You seem like you turned out okay.”
“If that’s a compliment, I’ll take it.”
“Do you feel like it hurt you not to have your dad in your life?”
“It’s hard to miss what you don’t know. It made me wonder if I could be a decent father when the time comes.”
“You’re wonderful with Nico.”
“I like him.” He laughed. “I never realized how much personality a baby can have.”
“He’s got personality, all right. I just hope I don’t screw him up too badly.”
“Life doesn’t always work out the way we want it to, but if you’re looking for the good in the world, it usually turns out okay.”
“Do you have a girlfriend?” The question was out of her mouth and hanging in the air before she had time to stop it. It was none of her business, yet she wanted to know badly.
“Not at the moment. I don’t do relationships so well. Cowboy—he’s the head of HERO Force and a good friend of mine—has been having a field day with me being married. It’s a running joke.”
That answer did more to stir her curiosity than satisfy it. “Why don’t you do relationships?”
“Never found anybody I wanted around that much.” He shrugged. “I date. I go out with women, but nothing serious.”
Grace thought those women might disagree. Matteo was a great guy and she could see it would be pretty easy to get attached to him.
Not that I’m getting attached.
This was different. Sure, they’d spent the night together, but that didn’t make up for the fact that he was here for the paycheck, not for her.
They were two consenting adults who just happened to have some great chemistry. And if it bothered her that he didn’t want to have sex with her, that was her problem.
27
Matteo called Cowboy as soon as he got back to the house, taking his cell phone into the backyard for privacy.
“Marriage counseling by Ramón, where we specialize in fictional spouses. How can I help you?”
Matteo couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re an asshole.”
“You love me.”
“Yeah. Listen, we’ve got trouble.” He told Cowboy about the explosion in the restaurant and exchanging bullets with someone in the alleyway. “We think an organization called Ten Komanda might be behind the terror attacks, and could possibly even be the shooter last night.”
“Logan got the lowdown on them from Interpol. They’re the real deal. Responsible for some nasty shit.”
“I need backup, Leo. If they’re really responsible, this is more than I can handle on my own. From what I hear, they’re as strong as we are.”
“I know. We’re already on our way. Somewhere around Reykjavik now.”
Matteo’s shoulders slumped with relief. “Thank God, man. I should have called you last night. I’ve got a bad feeling about this one.”
“We’ve got a chopper waiting in Moscow. Just hang tight and we’ll be there soon.”
“Who’s flying? Hawk?”
“Yeah.”
Matteo chuckled. “Godspeed, brother.”
“I know. Who would have thought this is how I’d go out?” He laughed. “No, I’m not talking about you, Trevor. Mind your own damn business. Geez. Everything else okay, Red? You didn’t get hurt too badly?”
“Just a flesh wound.”
“Things between you and Grace still wedded and blissful?”
“Of course.”
“Are you sleeping with her?”
He shook his head. “Fuckin’ A, Cowboy.”
“We’ll talk when I get there.”
“Tell Hawk not to fall out of the sky.” Matteo hung up the phone.
28
Grace climbed out of the steaming shower and dried herself off. In the days since her trip with Matteo, life had seemed to settle into some sort of rhythm she enjoyed, with him helping out with the baby and her father seeming to reach to some sort of truce with her. She wrapped a towel around her head, a robe around her body, and stepped into her bedroom.
"Grace.”
She jumped a mile. There, standing in the shadowed corner of her bedroom, was Mason Petrovich.
Her hand went to her chest, emotions warring for the upper hand within her. "What are you doing here?" she asked.
He started to move, the shadows sliding off of his skin as he stepped into the light. There was the strong and handsome face she remembered, the one she had fallen in love with, the one she’d expected to be dear for the rest of her life. Her head was swimming, dizziness threatening at the edges of her consciousness.
"I had to see you.” His eyes roamed her face, her neck, and lower.
“But—”
His jaw hardened. “You're married.”
She nodded, unable to say more. She was confused, befuddled—a hundred words canceling each other out until there were none.
“It’s good to see your face,” he said. “Do you know how many times I’ve imagined you were in front of me just so I could look at you again?”
Her memory was recovering from the shock of seeing him, bits of history dribbling into her mind like rain through a leaky roof. “You left me,” she said. “You walked out the door and you never came back.”
“Shh. It wasn’t like that.” He reached out to touch her cheek and she jerked her head back.
“Do you know what that did to me? How scared I was when I couldn’t find you?”
“If I could go back to that day and make a different decision, I would in a heartbeat.”
She was shaking her head, anger rising up within her. “I thought you were dead. I wandered the streets looking for you for days. I checked with hospitals. I called the morgue, for God’s sake.”
�
�I thought you would be better off without me.”
“Bullshit.” She pushed his chest hard with both hands.
“I know you must be angry."
"Angry?" There was a hysterical edge to her voice she could hear beyond its volume, and she wished she could make it go away, wished she could keep him from realizing how deeply he had hurt her. "I’m not angry. I’m livid. How did you get up here? You have no right to be in this room. No right to be in my life.”
“We could start again. We can go back to Switzerland or somewhere else away from politics and away from your father. We can be together.”
“I would sooner see you in hell than be with you again.”
He moved so quickly she was unprepared for his attack. He pushed her back against the wall, pinioning her with his body.
She screamed, and his hand covered her mouth. When he spoke, his mouth was too close to her ear, his voice too deep, and she struggled to move away from him. “I remember what it was like, that first time, when I took your virginity.”
She pushed against him, struggling to get free.
“Do you remember, sweetheart? Because I can’t forget, you little witch.”
His mouth was on her neck, wet and hurting her, the sound of him working his belt buckle free loud like the clanging of a bell.
She opened her mouth wide and bit his fingers. He pulled his hand back with a curse, and she screamed as loud as she could, “Matteo!”
His open hand slapped her across the face, the force of it slamming her skull against the wall, then his hand was back on her mouth and he was opening her robe, yanking at the fabric.
She imagined she was someplace else entirely, laughing with Matteo as they lounged on the bed, the baby between them. Mason cursed in her ear and she squeezed her eyes shut, desperate to stay in her own little world where this man couldn’t hurt her anymore.
She felt his naked erection on her hip and struggled against him as he tried to lift her leg. She heard her own muffled cries and thought they were pathetic, barely a whimper against his hand, never enough to save herself.