by Desiree Holt
“My niece. The one who gave you the cookies. Teal hair.” She slapped her hands on her dress just below the skirt. My guess was she was trying to remove the flour, but instead all she managed to do was send a flour cloud into the air.
“Oh no, she didn’t talk my ear off, not at all,” I insisted not wanting to cause any tension between the two women. “She was very sweet, I just was dawdling.” Dawdling, building up courage, they were kind of the same. Right?
“Well, dawdle no more.” Ms. Maggie gave me a pat on the shoulder before taking my tray from my hand and leading me to the back corner of the kitchen, where a small table sat. I wanted desperately to see how much flour was currently sitting on my dress after standing in this kitchen with clouds of flour everywhere. “Come have a seat and we shall go over details.” I scurried behind and sat where she indicated.
We spent the next hour going over my answers one by one. I couldn’t tell if she was trying to figure out if I had help filling them out and wanted to make sure they were valid or if she was just deciding if she really had found me the perfect match. Either which way, it was a pleasant enough conversation, and I felt no judgment from her.
“So, did I pass?” I was only half joking. The conversation flowed easily and she never looked less than happy with my answers, but that didn’t mean I was someone she was going to be able to help.
“Oh, sweetheart, this was no test.” She placed her hand on my arm, typical old lady style. “I was just wanting to chat with you. You looked so nervous at the counter. I figured we could use your answers as an icebreaker since you already gave them to me.”
I felt myself relax. I hadn’t realized how tense my body had been until I slunk back in my chair at her comment.
“So what’s next?” I picked up a cookie and began to munch. She had offered them multiple times during our conversation, but I had been too nervous to eat. Her smile brightened as I bit down.
“Next?” Ms. Maggie handed me a napkin, meeting my eyes the entire time. I hadn’t thought my question challenging, so I just took the napkin with a gentle nod and patted the corner of my mouth with it, biding time until she answered my question. “Right,” she began again after I quirked my eyes. There was something so likable about the older woman in front of me, even if she was flighty. “Your date.” Her hand landed on my arm again, her eyes brighter than they had been earlier. “He has a good job, is very handsome, and calls his mama every Sunday. That right there makes him a keeper in my book.”
I just nodded. True, it was endearing, but hearing it touched on some feelings I didn’t want to think about. I missed my pack. I didn’t belong there and would never have the life I deserved there. Cognitively I knew this, but the emptiness of not having a pack still hit me from time to time.
“There’s only one slight problem.” Maggie looked down as she spoke. I knew it was too good to be true; handsome, nice, and a good job were the trifecta of the dating world, and there was no way I could be that lucky on the first try.
“My looks?” My insecurities gave themselves away before I could stop myself, and I dropped my cookie. Shifters liked their woman in all shapes and sizes. From what I had seen of the human dating world, albeit through my work at the bar, that wasn’t as common for them. I had heard comment after comments like, “You take the fat one, so I can move in on the hot friend,” and, “There are only oinkers here tonight,” on a regular basis.
Heck, once in a while I even had comments directed to me, and I was the one bringing their libations. I came into the human world insecure about my latency and hoping to blend in, only to gain some insecurity over my curves, something I had generally been proud of before. The grass wasn’t greener, just different.
“Oh goodness no, child.” Her hand gave my arm a squeeze, bringing me back to the conversation at hand. “You’re gorgeous and he’s going to eat you up. The problem is a little more that … there’s no easy way to say this, so I’m just going to say it … he’s not a wolf. He’s a lion.”
How did she know… “What?” My flight response was kicking in full throttle. The first and most important rule of our kind was to keep our secret. I had to get out, at least my brain was telling me to. My body had other ideas and refused to move. The lack of control slammed into me. My brain buzzed while my body froze and both were such overreactions, yet there they were.
Nothing good could come of her knowing I was a wolf or from my body’s inability to deal. I had zero doubts that I had been allowed to leave the pack as young as I had only because I couldn’t shift and could easily hide. Most young wolves had to prove that they could control their shifts in all situations to avoid exposure before they could even consider moving away. Keeping our secret was one area no one even pretended to rebel in. I was hidden by my nature, yet somehow this little old lady I had just met knew my secret.
“I know you wolves are all—”
“What?!” My voice cracked as I tried to feign shock and contingency plans rolled around in my head. If I could’ve changed, I feared I would’ve done more harm than good. I was shaking, actually visibly shaking, yet her hand held its gentle place on my arm.
No matter how rational the human side of a shifter was, a scared wolf was a dangerous wolf. My wolf might’ve been hidden deeply inside me so far I couldn’t reach her, but sitting there in that moment, I could feel her. Her terror suddenly pushed through me in pulses, which oddly made me feel better instantly.
I wasn’t scared of Maggie—at least, Ruby the human wasn’t. I wasn’t scared that she knew I was a shifter or even knew my animal. No, the human side of me could feel the goodness in her. It was my wolf, the one that was so damaged she had never once emerged, that held the emotions causing my body, and for a brief moment my mind, to act so peculiarly and frankly, unnervingly.
“Did you really think I didn’t know? Or are you afraid of your alpha?” Her calm voice, paired with my awareness that it wasn’t actually me who was in a full all out panic, brought me back to the moment. “Of course I know. How else could I find mates?” Maggie sounded so perplexed by my dismay.
“I’m not looking for a mate,” I confessed and pushed my chair back, her hand falling from my arm. “I’m looking for a husband.” The last word hurt coming out.
It was one thing to tell myself I was willing to settle for less than my dream, it was another to let someone else know, even if they were a stranger. I could have a fabulous marriage with children and a white picket fence, but something would always be missing. A mating bond was like no other, and since my wolf was so deeply embedded in me, the chances she would come out to give a mating mark were zilch.
“Why would you do that?” she asked. I pushed in my chair and gathered the plate and napkin, preparing to leave. “I see,” Maggie mumbled as she stood, took the plate from my hand, and placed it back on the table. Her eyes met mine, which glued to hers. Softness and kindness showed in her expression. She really did see. “You think because your wolf doesn’t come out to play, you don’t deserve a mate.”
“How … how do you …? I have to go.” She was so spot on in my thoughts, yet I couldn’t focus on that. No one, not even my father, the alpha, had been able to sense my latency. It had been time and lack of shifting that told both the pack and myself that I was lesser, not quite shifter—not quite human.
“Child, quit being silly. I know because I’m sort of a shifter.” She spoke quickly, yet quietly, as if trying to squelch my qualms with her confession. Surprisingly, it sort of did. The sort of told me she had secrets, and that usually led to a decent alliance in the shifter world.
“Sort of? You are or you aren’t.” It was bad form to ask a shifter directly what kind of shifter they were, and sort of had me guessing she was either something rather tiny and harmless or something rare. Either way, I figured asking without asking was a better plan. The stink eye she gave told me that it came across as giving sass though, so I lowered my eyes in a subtle sign of submission.
“Are you?�
� Maggie countered, accepting the slight power my submission gave her. She seemed more amused than anything at that point, which had me crossing my fingers she was a bunny or a mouse or the like. An amused alligator, one of the rarer shifters I knew were in the area, could inadvertently lead to badness if her amusement got away from her. Shifters in animal form tended to play as their animal did and an alligator at play was the stuff nightmares were made of.
“Not the point.” The firmness in my voice was lacking. She and I both knew I was and how utterly broken I was.
“Child, I am, but I’m not typical.”
I breathed deep and crossed my fingers and toes it wasn’t an alligator.
“I’m a dragon.”
“I thought … I thought they were all gone.” According to legend, true dragons were far scarier than alligators when they wanted to be, but unlike alligators, dragons had a legacy of saving shifters. They protected our kind through the ages until they disappeared centuries ago. I found myself stepping forward and hugged the woman I had only minutes ago tried to flee from. Tears filled my eyes and I tried hard to hold them in, the moment so overpowering. Just knowing that she, a dragon, was alive made all the rest of this adventure white noise. Dragons were alive, at least one was.
“They are, except for me.” I pulled back slightly, her words dampening my joy slightly. As a child, I had often wished for and dreamed about the dragons coming back. “I’m much older than I look.” She bopped my nose and pulled back, the attempt to lighten the mood working slightly.
“Before you ask about Melanie, her mom was my best friend. She’s my niece in every sense of the word but by blood. She’s not a shifter. She’s fae.”
I nodded. My whole world had just changed. I had come looking for a husband, and before I even got a name of a possible suitor, I learned that not only was there a dragon still with us, but the fae had not left our world completely as I had been taught.
“I … I think maybe …” I didn’t know what I thought. Fae—fae, who left this world centuries ago—were back. I had no idea how to begin to even process that.
“Yes, dear, we have a lot to discuss before your date with Chris tonight.”
I’m Wearing the Panties, Thank You Very Much
Two hours later I left the bakery, a small piece of paper with the time and place of my blind date with Chris in hand and my head spinning. We spent far more time discussing the history of dragons and fae than we did my blind date, and I almost hoped my blind date wouldn’t work out so I could have an excuse to come visit her again and learn more about her.
Somehow, Maggie had been lucky enough to be visiting the fae when the dragons disappeared. I say lucky, but her eyes told a different story. Time travelled very differently in the fae and she had no idea she had been gone so long and had consequently missed so much. I couldn’t tell if it was guilt over missing the births of the nieces and nephews she never got to meet or sorrow over never getting to say good bye to those she loved. I ventured to guess it was a little bit of both.
I was also shocked to learn that the fae never left our realm, they just became more secretive as a means of self-preservation. After the dragons left, so did their protection. Not that they were feeble and weak, but no shifter would have harmed a fae for fear of the wrath of the dragon, and then that fear was gone. The growth of cities also played a role in their scarcity, for most fae preferred nature to brick and mortar.
Melanie was the exception to that rule. She loved the city, and when Maggie decided to set up shop, Melanie was all too excited to jump on board. Melanie came in for the last part of our conversation when the bakery closed for the afternoon, and I really enjoyed her company. She made noise about having a girls’ night out one night soon. Part of me feared she was just being nice and nothing would come of it while the other part of me did a little happy dance, hoping it would become a regular thing. I loved Camille and always had fun with her, but making a new friend was never a bad idea, especially a friend I could be myself around.
I pulled out my phone and stepped lively as I noticed the time. Thankfully my car was fairly close by. If I had a lead foot, I would barely have time to shower and throw on a new dress. Hair and make-up would have to be more on the natural side, which was probably for the best since make-up and I weren’t exactly on a first name basis. If mascara hit my face during the week, I was truly putting in an effort.
Before I managed to slide my phone back into my purse, it began to buzz. I chuckled as I read it. Camille was not one for beating around the bush.
Details. I need all the details.
I felt an instant drop in my stomach as it hit me when I thought of all the things I had to omit from my conversation with Camille. I hated how I could never be truly open with her, and I looked for loopholes like you couldn’t believe to no avail. I wanted her to know about me, my family, and I was now adding dragons and fae to the list, but rules were rules and this rule was not to be broken.
Can’t now. Running late. I have a date at 7pm.
I smiled to myself as I pulled out my car keys. She would take the bait, which was the only reason I left it. I was getting more and more nervous about my date, and Camille would be a distraction at the very least but more likely a comfort.
On my way.
She truly was the perfect friend. Camille was dropping everything for an impromptu get together and dress up time. Having her there would alleviate the stress of getting ready, and the lack of time would make it easy for me to leave out the details of my afternoon.
Fortunately, there was a parking spot right out front of my building, something that rarely happened. Maybe the stars were aligning and my date might be the right one, even if he was a shifter. Wolves were not ones for accepting latents as anything but broken, but maybe lions were different. I grew up around wolves and bears. Both were very different from each other, so I assumed lions would be as well.
Camille was waiting for me when I got there, which surprised me not at all. She lived closer than the bakery and was probably out the door before I even pulled out of my parking spot. I barely unlocked the door before she began barking orders for me to get showered while she picked out my clothes, not that we hadn’t already done so the night before.
After the world’s fastest shower, she made quick work of my hair and make-up. I couldn’t remember the last time I turned on my hairdryer, much less used product in my hair, but looking in the mirror, I vowed to make it a more regular thing. I looked amazing.
“Here.” Camille handed me a small bag I hadn’t noticed before. I opened it and my mouth dropped as I pulled out a lacey bra and barely-there panty set.
“Really?” I admonished her playfully.
“Really. Now go put them on. I spent a good hour picking out the perfect pair this afternoon.”
“Didn’t you have to, you know, work?” Camille was notorious for using all of her personal time. Her motto was, “Why earn it if you’re not going to use it?” Having always worked per diem or hourly, I was never in that situation. If I didn’t work, I didn’t get paid, so I always worked.
“Nope.”
“Wanna tell me why?” I was hoping she would simply say she called in, but her quick nope made me concerned her boss finally said enough was enough and let her go.
“Nope. I want you to put those on so I can help you get the dress on without messing up your hair.” She winked. I just shook my head in amusement. “For the record, you don’t actually have to wear the panties tonight if you don’t want to.”
“You’re horrible.” My face burned like a thousand suns, to be sure. I was not that girl. Even when I dated frequently, I was always prim and proper on the outside. Sure, I got a little friendly with the boys when I felt a connection, but overt sexualization of my attire, even hidden attire, wasn’t my thing. Not to mention that being pantiless sounded far more sexy in theory than it felt in reality, especially in the summer.
“Just sayin’.” She gave my butt a playful smack and ge
stured for me to lift my arms, which I did. The dress she had picked out for me was lower cut than I usually wore. I only bought it because it was on clearance and had pockets—I know pockets are a silly reason to buy a dress, but who doesn’t love pockets? “It’s been too long for you, Ruby, and by too long I mean since I’ve known you.”
She wasn’t wrong. I had become far too intimate with my battery operated boyfriends as of late. Shifters, especially wolves, were meant to mate and mate for life. but here I was with a drawer full of boyfriends and a large battery line item in my budget.
“Yeah, well I don’t see you knocking boots every night lately.” I put my hands on my hips and stuck out my tongue as she zipped up my dress, not that she could see me, but it still felt good.
“Truth. I’m hoping Mr. Dentist will change that.”
“Make sure he woos you properly.” I turned, hoping she could sense the sincerity of my words. Camille needed to be all done with the bad boys. She deserved so much better. She deserved wooing.
“Yeah, yeah.” She twirled me around, most likely to give me a final look over before pointing to the mirror. She had a huge smile on her face, and when I saw what she was looking at, I understood why. I looked amazing. I spent so much time in uniforms and pj’s with my hair thrown in a loose bun or pony that I forgot how well I cleaned up. Silently, I vowed to myself to dress up a bit more often, even if it only meant nice jeans and a blouse.
“Never mind about me, let’s get back to you.” Camille whipped out her teacher voice, a relic from her past as a teaching assistant when she worked her way through college. “Do you have condoms in your purse?”
“I won’t need them,” I insisted, although secretly I was hoping I would. Not that I would really need them. Shifters didn’t catch diseases, and unless they were mated, there would be no babies.