“Because I told Piper I’m not willing to try again.”
“What does one thing have to do with the other? What am I missing?”
“You’re not missing a lot. One thing doesn’t have a lot to do with the other, even though they seem like they would.”
“Did you get up early just to find ways to confuse the dickens out of me? Because you have.”
“No, no, I’m up early because I’m conflicted. I have been since Thursday. But I don’t think I’m going to change my mind.”
“Details, Haley. Details would be nice.”
“Okay,” she sighed. “Piper wants to get back together, and if I thought she’d be happy cutting hair again, I’d go back to LA and find work training dogs privately. That wouldn’t be my top choice, but I’d have control, which might make up for having less variety and excitement in my life.”
“But you’re certain she wouldn’t be happy cutting hair, right?”
“Certain of that, Mom. Absolutely certain. She’s had just a tiny taste of being a mover and a shaker, and she’s hooked. Just like anyone would be,” she admitted. “It’s not her fault.”
“And you refuse to be with anyone who’s a mover or a shaker. Is that right? Moving and shaking isn’t for you?”
“Well, no, that’s not exactly right. I guess…” She thought of how to put words to what were honestly just her gut instincts. “Um, I guess I’m not willing to be with a fledgling mover and shaker. I simply don’t know how this job will change her.”
“But you’re sure it will change her.”
“This is such a drastic change, Mom. I’m sure it will take her a while to discover who she is again. And I refuse to get in too deeply, only to find she’s a different person. A person I don’t like, or don’t trust, or don’t admire… The list of things that could happen are kinda endless.”
“But she’s an adult, Haley. Isn’t this a little late for big personality changes?”
“Mmm, yes, I guess it is. So maybe I used the wrong word.” She closed her eyes and thought for a second. “I was thinking about something I read a while ago. The gist was that some jobs don’t change you, they simply reveal you. I hope the Piper I think I know is the Piper that emerges when she’s got a taste of power, but I don’t want to lock myself into this relationship if she’s not.”
“I take it Piper’s not happy with your decision? I know I wouldn’t be.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“Honey, you’re basically telling her that you think her moral code is so weak that you worry this job will reveal some significant character defects. I hate to be so blunt, but I’d tell you where to get off.”
“Yeah,” she said quietly. “That’s what she’s done. She was furious on Friday, but I saw her yesterday and she was polite, but completely businesslike.”
“You can’t have it both ways, honey. I’m not saying you’re making a mistake, but you can’t expect Piper to be friendly when you’ve told her you don’t care for her enough to work through this.”
“But I do, Mom,” she said, letting out a shuddering sigh. “I love her. But I’m not going to let her hurt me if this new power she wields goes to her head.”
“I’ve said this before, honey, but I’m going to say it again. When you love someone, you lean in harder to work things out. You don’t walk away and tell them to let you know when they’re perfect.”
“I don’t—”
“I think you do, Haley. You’ve dated some nice women, but you gave them just enough rope to hang themselves with. I think you’re afraid of being hurt, so you set the bar way, way too high.”
“Maybe I’ve done that before, but that’s not what I’m doing here. I simply don’t know who Piper will be once she’s in deep. And until I do, I’m not going to give her the chance to break my heart. Been there. Done that.”
***
A week after the blackmail attempt, Piper strolled by the aviary, flinching when her passage was greeted with near silence. She hadn’t been inside the cabin since Haley had kicked her to the curb, but she couldn’t resist. After knocking, she entered, finding just Bobby the parrot in his cage, every other bird gone.
“What’s going on?” she demanded.
Haley had been standing by the cage, with the door open. “My last day’s tomorrow,” she said, turning to give Piper a wistful look. “I loaded the other guys up and took them back to the warehouse on the ferry early this morning. Just got back.”
“A little notice would have been nice! Tim didn’t say a thing.” She was about to bitch at Haley for not saying anything either, then realized that would have been pretty ballsy, since Piper was the one who’d cut off communication.
“That’s not how things are done,” Haley said, obviously not surprised by this turn of events. “Once we film Bobby’s death, Tim can catch anything he missed with a stand-in parrot in LA. He’s sure he’s got him covered for all of the lines he has to speak, and any shots that need to be outside.” She turned to look at the bird, then clearly said, “Play dead.”
He stared at her for a minute, then picked one foot up as he raised his wings high, a trick he seemed to like doing. Haley rolled her eyes, then went over to the table and picked up a couple of banana chips and showed them to the bird. “Play dead,” she said again and he immediately fell to his side, not moving until she said, “Look alive!”
He got his feet under himself, then squawked loudly, flapping his wings when she gave him both of the chips.
“I normally wouldn’t let a bird hold me hostage like this, but since tomorrow’s his last day I can’t be too strict.”
“You’ve done a great job,” Piper said quietly. “I know that was hard for him to learn.”
“Yeah, it was, but he’s just playing me now. He’s the smartest bird I’ve ever worked with, and he’s got a sense for how important this trick is. He’s milking me for all it’s worth.”
“Bo-bee!” he screeched, flapping his gorgeous wings, looking immensely proud of himself.
“So I guess you’ll be taking off?”
“I’m off the clock when his big death scene’s over. I’m going to head over to the office and find out what travel arrangements they’ve made for me. I know they don’t want to pay for hotels, so I’ll probably be out on the last flight tomorrow night.”
“Got it,” Piper said, turning to leave. “I’ll catch you before you go,” she added, hurrying out to shed her tears in private. Once you knew someone didn’t share your feelings, it was just too revealing to let them see your vulnerability.
She kicked it into gear, hoping to find Delta nearby. He could always be counted on to lick her tears away, while never demanding she share why they’d appeared.
***
The next day, Haley was the only person scheduled for an afternoon ferry ride, an impromptu one. She had to get over to Oahu and deliver Bobby to an approved veterinary hospital so he could be checked out before his owner, a guy from Honolulu, claimed him. Then she had to hit the airport for an 8:45 p.m. flight. When the production team didn’t want to pay for an Oahu hotel, they hustled you out like lightning.
She’d been dreading this last bit of time with Piper. They were both clearly sad, both hurt. But Piper had been absolutely unwilling to show her feelings. She was merely polite. Polite, but distant. Only Charlie had shown any emotion when they’d finished Bobby’s death scene. Charlie had hugged her like Haley was being banished, giving her noisy kisses to both cheeks, insisting that Haley take down her cell phone and email, information she was pretty sure she didn’t give out easily. But Haley was certain she wouldn’t use them. Why would she? Just to torture herself?
Piper carried two big duffle bags filled with all of Haley’s clothes and electronics, while Haley carried Bobby’s roomy, but less cumbersome travel cage. It wasn’t a long walk to the ferry, but it sure did seem like it.
“Talked to your friend Alejandra today,” Piper said. “I’m glad your buddies had a party for you
last night.”
“Yeah,” Haley said, keeping it brief. “I’m going to miss…lots of people.”
They walked on in silence, with Haley still puzzled by Piper’s insistence that she be allowed to help carry her stuff to the ferry. “So…?” Haley asked, trying to make conversation. “What’s on your agenda?”
“Well, the Aaron Evert movie will be premiering in a couple of months, so Charlie’s got to do a load of press for that. The premiere’s going to be in New Orleans. I guess I’ll finally get to sample some authentic Creole cuisine.”
“That sounds like fun. Have you talked to your boss at the salon? I mean, does she know you’re not coming back?”
“Not yet,” Piper said, her face a neutral mask. “Did I tell you Charlie’s decided to offer Zandra a full-time job?”
“Oh, that’s great! Is she going to be her assistant?”
“Something like that, I think. You know how Charlie is.” She let out a soft laugh. “No matter what her title is, Zandra will probably be watching Delta a whole lot more than she should have to.”
“Anyone connected to Charlie is a part-time dog minder,” Haley said, almost breaking into tears at the thought that she might never see her little buddy again.
“Yeah. At least part-time,” Piper said, not speaking again until they were at the dock.
The pilot was leaning against a piling, smoking a cigarette when he spotted them, giving a hearty wave. He carefully stubbed out the cigarette and put the butt in his pocket, clearly following Tim’s rule against throwing anything into the sea. “Ready to head out?”
“Yeah.” Haley put her hands around her mouth to amplify her voice. “Just me and the bird.”
“Ready when you are.” He jumped aboard and went into the pilot house to fire up the engines.
The moments ticked by like days, each one making Haley’s heart race a little more. She snuck a look at Piper, unable to see any of the gentle, unguarded sweetness that she’d come to love. Now Piper was only a pretty, stoic woman, devoid of emotion, exactly like any one of thousands of cool-headed businesspeople who ruled with their heads rather than their hearts.
Still… After wrapping her arms around Piper for a one-sided, emotion-filled hug, Haley got aboard. She sat on the plastic bench seat, braced Bobby’s cage between her feet and took in a breath. There was still a chance. If Piper jumped onto the boat and made a sincere pledge… It hardly mattered what the pledge was. That she’d wait for Haley to finish in Sicily… That she’d decided she didn’t want to manage Charlie… That she wanted to manage Charlie but could truly promise she’d stay the same sweet soul she’d been… Anything!
Opening her eyes, Haley saw Piper exactly where she’d left her: cooly gazing at the boat, hand raised to offer a weak wave. That was it. So much promise…left on a sunny dock on a sunny day in a tropical paradise that faded in the distance as the pilot kicked the ferry into gear, sputtering dark fumes that obscured Piper’s beautiful, emotionless image.
***
An hour later, Piper sat on the floor of Haley’s aviary, with Delta sniffing around where the bird cages had been. He was as happy as a clam, excitedly pushing his little nose onto every inch of the place, gloating over the fact that he’d finally run the monsters off with his ferocious bark.
Despite all evidence to the contrary, Piper had a certifiably crazy belief that Haley would return. Her feet would hit those steps, then the door would fly open and she’d stand there, slightly out of breath, offering some kind of compromise. Or, if not a compromise, to at least propose they stay close while she was gone. They could talk on the phone, email, text. Anything to stay in contact, even if they weren’t technically dating.
But she hadn’t done that. Hadn’t even offered a hint that she wanted that. But wasn’t that what you did when you seemed to love someone? Wasn’t the person more important than the job? Wasn’t the woman you loved worth taking a risk for?
In Haley’s case, the clear answer was “no.” No to the risk, and probably no to the love. The connection Piper was sure they had might have been as fake as that damn bird lying on his side simply to get a banana chip. An illusion.
November—Palermo
THANKSGIVING IN PALERMO WAS JUST another Thursday. But since a good number of the crew were Americans, the catering department did their best to set out a buffet lunch that was a very rough approximation of the traditional feast.
Since they weren’t going to officially break for lunch, Haley grabbed a plate and walked over to a huge tree on the estate, one that provided plenty of shade. Her dogs weren’t scheduled, and no one else needed help, so she sat down to enjoy her meal, consciously ignoring thoughts of her family gathering at her grandmother’s home for the day.
The shoot wasn’t a rag-tag production, but a $2 million movie had very little in common with the $200 million spent on Eden 2.0. Still, it was a professional production, with a couple of excellent producers who’d done a great job of cutting costs to the bone.
Given that the weather had been kind, their shooting schedule of forty-five days might actually happen. Haley would be involved until the end, since her dogs were required to be in a third of the scenes. Thankfully, they weren’t required to do much that didn’t come naturally. The six big Italian Mastiffs were either running across the entryway of the large, gated estate, barking their heads off every time a car approached, or lying peacefully at the feet of their mistress, a diabolically evil woman intent on taking over the family business. Convincing dogs to lie down or bark wasn’t really taxing her skills, but that was cool.
When Haley wasn’t working with her dogs, she once again snuck over to help out with wardrobe, cementing her friendships with four of the people she’d met in Hawaii.
Easy job, great weather, nice people, friendly crew. So why was she so friggin’ miserable?
Equally easy answer. Piper.
Their time apart hadn’t lessened Haley’s desire in the least. Sadly, it hadn’t quelled her fears, either. For all she knew, Piper was making up for lost time by availing herself of all of the gay and heteroflexible women lingering around Hollywood. She was just naïve enough to believe that a young actor trying to get a toe-hold in the business was interested in her—rather than her ability to provide a leg up.
That corrosive thought lingered for a moment, then dissolved when Haley blew it off as a ridiculous fantasy. She sat motionless for a few seconds, questioning herself. Why was she so sure that wasn’t true? Also an easy answer. Piper wasn’t truly naïve. She wasn’t generally suspicious, but she had good boundaries. Her refusing Meredith’s overtures had made that very clear.
A creeping dread started at her fingertips and crawled up her body. If she was so damn sure Piper would keep her moral code intact, why had she walked away from her? Wasn’t that the whole point?
Like a bolt, a stunning thought slammed into her conscious mind. Her fears of being hurt had made the pain she’d dreaded a reality.
Taking a look at her watch, she saw that it was three a.m. in LA, where she thought Piper was at the moment. Of course, she could have been just about anywhere. When you went out of your way to separate yourself from someone you loved, you didn’t have any control over where they went—or with whom.
Haley got up and walked back to the catering tent, looking for anyone she knew to help her dispel the panic that had started to overtake her.
But a hectoring voice kept repeating itself in her head, making her break out in a cold sweat. Why did you let her go? Why?
January—LA
HALEY’S INTERNAL CLOCK WAS SO screwed up she wasn’t sure what meal she should be eating. But for some reason she’d been jonesing for Chinese takeout ever since she’d gotten off the plane that afternoon. Thankfully, Lolita was in agreement, and she now lounged across the sofa waiting for Haley to plate the grub. Haley wasn’t sure who had been in charge of serving during the previous months, but she was fairly sure Lolita had a substitute on call. She was nothing if not indus
trious.
“Get in here!” Lolita yelped.
Haley dropped the fork and raced into the living room. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” She pointed at the television screen. “Charlie Summers is just about to get out of that limo.”
Weak at the knees, Haley found herself sitting on the arm of the sofa, staring. “How do you know?”
“This is one of those Hollywood gossip shows. Must be a slow night. The camera’s been on the car for a full minute.”
Then the door opened and a well-dressed guy got out. He was very slick, with his dark hair combed back, and a snug, shiny suit showing off his muscular chest. For a second, Haley thought he might be Charlie’s co-star, then she recalled that was Aaron Evert, and this guy was clearly not him. In fact, the guy didn’t actually look like an actor at all, given he didn’t even glance at a camera. Instead, he was scanning the crowd, more like a security guard. But security guards didn’t usually have suits this expensive. He put his hand out, and helped Charlie emerge. A tall, tanned, simply gorgeous woman who caught and held your gaze. The absolute epitome of an emerging star.
Piper had given her a casual hairstyle, with the blonde strands just hovering over Charlie’s bare shoulders. But her gown was anything but simple. Tons of silver beads, or maybe sequins, cascading down her long, lean body. The dress fit like it had been sewn onto her, until it reached her knees, where it flared.
“I love a fishtail gown if it’s not too over-the-top,” Lolita said, assessing the look with her usual critical eye. “The silver works for her, doesn’t it? Sometimes it can make a woman look icy, but it doesn’t do that to her. Lord, she has a body to die for,” she sighed.
“She does,” Haley said, nodding robotically.
Charlie preened, turning around twice as she tossed her head, making those gentle blonde tresses move. When she looked over her right shoulder, her glittering eyes coquettishly fluttering at the cameras, Haley could only stare, transfixed.
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