'Yes, sir.'
'A rather severe reprimand, I thought?'
'Well phrased, sir.'
'And Bertram dismissed without a stain on his character.'
'Yes, sir.'
'But with Police Sergeant Voules firmly convinced that he is either an inveterate souse or a congenital loony. Possibly both. However,' I proceeded, turning from the dark side, 'it is no use worrying about that.'
'Very true, sir.'
'The main point is that once again you have shown that there is no crisis which you are unable to handle. A very smooth effort, Jeeves. Exceedingly smooth.'
'I could have effected nothing without your co-operation, sir.'
'Tush, Jeeves! I was a mere pawn in the game.'
'Oh, no, sir.'
'Yes, Jeeves. I know my place. But there's just one thing. Don't think for a moment that I want to detract from the merit of your performance, but you did have a bit of luck, what?'
'Sir?'
'Well, that cable happening to come along in what you might call the very nick of time. A fortunate coincidence.'
'No, sir. I had anticipated its arrival.'
'What!'
'In the cable which I dispatched to my friend Benstead in New York the day before yesterday, I urged him to lose no time in re- transmitting the message which formed the body of my communication.'
'You don't mean to say—?'
'Immediately after the rift had occurred between Mr Stoker and Sir Roderick Glossop, involving, as it did, the former's decision not to purchase Chuffnell Hall and the consequent unpleasantness to his lordship and Miss Stoker, the dispatching of the cable to Benstead suggested itself to me as a possible solution. I surmised that the news that the late Mr Stoker's will was being contested would lead to a reconciliation between Mr Stoker and Sir Roderick.'
'And there's nobody contesting the will really?'
'No, sir.'
'But what about when old Stoker finds out?'
'I feel convinced that his natural relief will overcome any possible resentment at the artifice. And he has already signed the necessary documents relating to the sale of Chuffnell Hall.'
'So that even if he's as sick as mud he can't do a thing?'
'Exactly, sir.'
I fell into a moody silence. Apart from astounding me, this revelation had had the effect of engendering a poignant anguish. I mean to say, the thought that I had let this man get away from me, that he was now in Chuffy's employment, and that there was a fat chance of Chuffy ever being chump enough to put him into circulation again ... well, dash it, you can't say it wasn't enough to shove the iron into the soul.
It was with something of the spirit of the old aristocrat mounting the tumbril that I forced myself to wear the mask.
'Cigarette, Jeeves?'
He produced the box, and I puffed in silence.
'Might I ask, sir, what you intend to do now?'
I came out of the reverie.
'Eh?'
'Now that your cottage is burned down, sir. Is it your purpose to take another in this neighbourhood?'
I shook the head.
'No, Jeeves, I shall return to the metrop.'
'To your former apartment, sir?'
'Yes.'
'But...'
I anticipated the question.
'I know what you are going to say, Jeeves. You are thinking of Mr Manglehoffer, of the Honourable Mrs Tinkler-Moulke and Lieutenant-Colonel J. J. Bustard. But circumstances have altered since I was compelled to take the firm stand I did in regard to their attitude towards the old banjolele. From now on, there will be no friction. My banjolele perished in the flames last night, Jeeves. I shall not buy another.'
'No, sir?'
'No, Jeeves. The zest has gone. I should not be able to twang a string without thinking of Brinkley. And the one thing I do not wish to do till further notice is think of that man of wrath.'
'You are not intending to retain him in your employment, then, sir?'
'Retain him in my employment? After what has occurred? After finishing first by the shortest of heads in the race with him and his carving knife? I do not so intend, Jeeves. Stalin, yes. Al Capone, certainly. But not Brinkley'
He coughed.
'Then, as there is a vacancy in your establishment, sir, I wonder if you would consider it a liberty if I were to offer my services?'
I upset the coffee-pot.
'You said – what, Jeeves?'
'I ventured to express the hope, sir, that you might be agreeable to considering my application for the post. I should endeavour to give satisfaction, as I trust I have done in the past.'
'But ...'
'I would not wish, in any case, to continue in the employment of his lordship, sir, now that he is about to be married. I yield to no one in my admiration for the many qualities of Miss Stoker, but it has never been my policy to serve in the household of a married gentleman.'
'Why not?'
'It is merely a personal feeling, sir.'
'I see what you mean. The psychology of the individual?'
'Precisely, sir.'
'And you really want to come back with me?'
'I should esteem it a great privilege, sir, if you would allow me to do so, sir, unless you are thinking of making other plans.'
It is not easy to find words in these supreme moments, if you know what I mean. What I mean is, you get a moment like this – supreme, as you might say – with the clouds all cleared away and the good old sun buzzing along on all six cylinders – and you feel ... well, I mean, dash it!
'Thank you, Jeeves,' I said.
'Not at all, sir.'
THE END
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Thank You, Jeeves Page 21