He hadn’t even told her he loved her.
Sammi paced through the den, heading toward the garage, but stopped in the kitchen.
What right did he have to ask her to stay?
His fist curled, crumpling and ripping the paper.
The front door banged open, startling him. Feet pounded the hardwood and a moment later Autumn skidded into the kitchen, her eyes wide.
“Don’t read that.” She dove toward him, snatching the bits of paper and ripping them. “Please don’t read it. Please. Please. Please.”
Fat tears rolled down her cheeks, and all he could do was stare at her.
Autumn had come home.
He uncurled his hand and she grabbed the paper, backing up against the island until she hit it and slid to the ground, clutching the declaration to divorce to her chest.
“You read it, didn’t you?” Her voice was small and tinged with fear.
“Yeah.” His tongue wouldn’t move. He’d had a whole speech, a plea for forgiveness prepared, but the words escaped him.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. I’m impulsive and I didn’t think it through.” She buried her face in her hands. “Please, I’m sorry.”
Sammi snatched a paper towel off the roll and knelt next to her. He peeled her hands back and wiped her face, but the tears kept coming.
“Hey, stop that. I can’t think when you cry. Please don’t cry?” He swiped the tears away, but they kept coming.
“Don’t leave me.”
Her eyes shone with such love, vulnerability and hurt that it rocked him to his to his soul.
Sammi didn’t deserve this. Or her.
“How can I live without the sun?” He mopped up a fresh wave of tears and mustered a weak smile. “Come on, stop crying.”
Autumn bit her lip, her brow creased and her eyes so large behind the chunky frames.
Sammi smoothed her hair back and cupped her face. He was losing the battle with her tears, so it was time to change tactics.
“I had this whole speech prepared last night. I was going to come home, tell you how sorry I was for failing you, for giving up when I should have been fighting and promise to be a better man and husband—”
“You don’t have to apologize—”
“Yes, I do.” He grabbed the letter and crumpled it up again. “This right here proves that I failed you. I made you think there wasn’t a future.” The blood rushed past his ears so loud he couldn’t hear anything. Autumn stared at him, looking lost and hopeful and beautiful. “And the truth is, somewhere along the way, I fell into love with you without even realizing it.”
Autumn’s smile blossomed so bright it dazzled him into silence. She covered her mouth and yet more tears ran down her cheeks.
“Oh come on, stop with the tears.” He pushed her hands aside and rubbed the soaking-wet towel over her cheeks.
She laughed and he chuckled.
“Come here.” He gave up on the tears and hugged her to his chest. She clung to him, and for several moments neither spoke or moved.
This was right. Autumn in his arms, in his heart, part of his life. This was what life was supposed to be like.
Autumn held on to Sammi for dear life. He couldn’t possibly be saying what she thought he was saying. Could he?
Tremors shook her body and she buried her face in Sammi’s chest, inhaling his scent. His strength was back and she craved the way he held her tight, with no possibility of escape.
Had he said it?
Could she have dreamed the whole thing?
She fisted his t-shirt in one hand and peeked up at him, only to catch him staring down at her. The warmth and yes, love, she saw there stopped everything. The world around them ceased to move, her lungs stopped breathing and her heart paused its pumping. For this one moment words weren’t necessary because love was a language all its own.
Autumn felt fresh tears on her cheeks as her chest ached, too small to hold all of the love inside her.
“Is this normal?” Sammi muttered, cupping her face with one hand.
“What?”
“I want…” His brow creased and his lips moved without sound. “I want to squeeze you so tight we become one person and you can never run away again. I want to be attached to you at the hip so I never have to be without you. I want…I want to do whatever it takes to make you stop fucking crying.”
Autumn laughed and swiped at her cheeks, dashing the tears away. “I can’t help it.”
Sammi’s mouth set into a hard line. He pushed back, grabbing her hands and hauling them both to their feet. In one motion, he grabbed her around the waist and threw her over his shoulder.
Autumn squawked and giggled. Her purse flew over her shoulder and hit the floor, but Sammi never stopped. He carried her into their bedroom and flipped her onto the bed. She bounced and rolled to her back, watching Sammi kick off his shoes and grab a box of tissues.
He seemed so determined, focused on her face, pulling out several tissues and removing her glasses. She giggled because she couldn’t help it any longer. There was just too much emotion inside her. He gently wiped her tears away. Again.
At some point the tissue disappeared, probably dropped on the mattress, and Sammi traced her lips with his fingers, her cheekbones and brow line, mapping all of her features with touch. The silence stretched tight, humming with anticipation, but of what she didn’t know.
Did he really love her?
Had she heard that wrong?
“What’s going on in there?” He smoothed over her forehead, pushing tendrils of hair away from her face.
“Did you mean it?” She bit her lip, fearful of his answer.
“What?”
“The part where you said you fell in love with me. There’s a difference between being in love, loving and falling in love.” She was babbling, but he wasn’t speaking.
It was Sammi’s turn to furrow his brow. “Women complicate things.”
“Yes, we do.”
He grinned and flattened his palm against her cheek, their bodies stretched out next to each other. She could see it again in his gaze but she needed the words.
“I love you. I’ve been in love with you and was too stupid and wrapped up in myself to realize it. I’ve fallen madly in love with you, to the point of blowing off a really important meeting so I could stare out of a hotel window and think about you last night.” He slowly rubbed his hand up and down against her cheek.
Autumn’s grin nearly split her face. Her cheeks hurt so hard, but the warmth, the love was ready to burst through her.
“Really?”
He chuckled and leaned in until their noses touched. “Really. I really do love you.”
She sighed and allowed herself to jump into the giddy pool of happiness. Life wasn’t perfect, but they had each other. They had love.
Sammi’s eyes closed slowly and he slanted his head just enough. She wrapped her arm around his neck and fisted his shirt with the other. The kiss started sweet, a meeting of lips, a sigh of breath and a deepening connection.
Autumn hooked her leg over his and he rolled over on top of her. Laughter bubbled up as their lips separated slightly. He made her so happy.
“Sammi?”
“Hm?” He smoothed her hair away from her face, maybe for the hundredth time, but the small gesture still melted her heart. He noticed the small things others missed.
“I want you inside of me.”
The dreamy, content smile sharpened instantly, his gaze growing focused. He scooted down and pushed her shirt up. He kissed her stomach, dropping kisses at random over her fluttering muscles.
Autumn sat up and pulled her shirt and bra off, wiggling the garments up over her head. If she had to wait on Sammi, he’d take an hour to get that far into things and she didn’t want to wait that long.
“You’re never going to slow down, are you?” He grinned and laughed as he pulled off his shirt.
“Nope. I’m impulsive, reckless and impatient. Deal with it.” She grasped his belt
and unfastened it.
“I’m going to make it my mission to change your mind.” And yet he sat there and let her tab his jeans open and unzip the fly.
“Do that later,” she whined, trying and failing to work his jeans off his hips because he wouldn’t move. She tipped her chin up and stuck out her bottom lip.
He snorted and tapped her nose. “You’re lucky I love you.”
“You do.” She grinned and a new wave of warmth and desire washed through her.
Sammi rose up on his knees and she shoved his jeans and underwear down his thighs. He pushed her back and didn’t even bother with unfastening her shorts, just pulled the denim and panties off with her shoes and tossed them onto the floor. His jeans and shoes followed with a kick or two of his feet, and then he was on top of her. His weight pressing her into the mattress. His hands grasping hers.
Autumn completely understood the urge to squeeze him so tight they became one person, one heart, one mind, one soul and twice the love. Staring into his gaze, it was as if she’d found a part of herself she didn’t know was missing. He was her anchor. Her ground.
He let go of one of her hands and teased her clit, flicking the ring piercing her flesh back and forth. It never got old, and when Sammi did it, something about his touch made it more intense. He didn’t mash the bundle of nerves, just used the barest touch. She arched her back and gripped his shoulder with her free hand.
He sucked her breast.
Sammi thrust into her, hard and deep. She saw stars as every delicious inch sank into her pussy.
This was what she wanted.
Sammi in her heart, in her body, with her always.
He hiked her thigh higher over his waist, planted one hand on the bed next to her shoulder and levered up. The angle of penetration was interesting. Not bad, just—different. She rolled her hips and squeezed his length with her inner muscles.
“Look at me,” he growled.
She peeked up through her lashes at him. His features were tight and the fierce love she saw staring down at her stole her breath.
He fucked her hard and fast until lights exploded behind her eyelids and she screamed her release.
Sammi eased down next to her and clutched her to his chest, stroking her hair. For several moments they lay in boneless, sated bliss, his hands lazily stroking her hair and back.
“Don’t leave me, okay?” Sammi said.
Autumn propped her chin on his chest and studied him. “Don’t let me.”
“Deal.”
“Should I sign another contract?”
He snorted and kissed her forehead. “If that’s what it takes, yes.”
Autumn nestled her head on his shoulder and pinched herself just to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. She smiled at the sharp pain. This was her life. He was her love. And this was worth living.
Epilogue
Six Months Later…
Sammi shifted from foot to foot as the music swelled and changed. The cool fall breeze rustled the trees bordering the backyard. The music playing over the loudspeakers changed and the collection of friends and family held their breath as the curtain over the patio door was whisked aside.
His world narrowed to the two women standing at the other end of the flower-strewn aisle.
Autumn stood there in a tea-length cream dress with a rainbow of frills sticking out from the bottom, multicolored fishnets and bright-red heels. A tiny veil with a peacock feather arching over her head hid her eyes, but her smile beamed at him. Next to her, Cathy clung to her arm, nervously smiling around at the assembled guests.
Sammi blew out a breath and wiped his face. It was just sweat, or so he told himself. It didn’t matter that six months ago they’d had the first, very Jewish ceremony. They’d become different people, and now he loved her even more, and actually realized the prize he’d lucked into.
“Breathe,” Isaac whispered at his side.
Sammi sucked in a breath, unsure when he’d stopped breathing, but Autumn had that effect on him. She stole his breath, his heart and at times, his sanity, but she always gave it back.
The duo of mother and daughter reached the last row of chairs. Cathy practically dove for the empty seat reserved for her, sinking down and folding her hands in her lap so fast it left everyone blinking. Autumn’s mouth quirked and her gaze locked on his. Sammi had to tightly compress his lips to keep from laughing. Cathy’s quirks were something he was growing used to, but most importantly, she was there today. For Autumn.
His gaze flicked to the notably empty chair reserved for his mother.
Before the ceremony could pause, Sammi stepped toward his bride and took her hand. A track of moisture stood out on her cheeks.
“I thought you promised no more tears?” he whispered.
“I can’t help it,” she replied.
Carly, the maid of honor, handed Autumn a tissue. Behind Carly, Kellie, Pandora, Mary and Ester all had tissues. These people had stood beside them through things no person should ever have to live through, and he appreciated each and every one of them for standing up for Autumn and him. But right now, the only person in his world who mattered was his beautiful bride.
“Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today so that these two may renew their commitment to each other in the sight of their friends and family…” The officiator continued to speak but her words faded into the background as Sammi gazed into Autumn’s eyes. She was his future, his hope and his love. It had taken him longer to come to that realization than her, but she’d forgiven him.
He’d committed himself once to her, but this time was for life, and he hoped it would be a long one.
“Pst, this is the part where you talk,” Autumn whispered.
“Oh.” Sammi glanced at the officiator, who had her lower lip between her teeth, cheeks rosy and eyes dancing with laughter. “Uh, vows?”
“That would be this part, yes,” she whispered.
“Right.” He dug a sticky note out of his pocket and blew out yet another breath. He flashed a grin at Autumn, as nervous as if this was their first time tying the knot. “Autumn, you are my sunshine and my alarm clock. Marrying you once wasn’t enough, and I am eternally grateful that you agreed to marry me a second time. I commit to movie marathons, keeping a roof over our heads and loving you until the day I die and beyond. I love you, Sunshine. Be mine?”
Autumn danced in place and sniffed loudly. She nodded, her smile a twist of emotion and love. And more damn tears.
“Yes, I will be yours,” she got out before another sniffle.
Sammi slid her wedding set back on her finger and breathed a sigh of relief. He hadn’t liked taking it back, even for the ceremony. Seeing the rings back where they belonged settled him.
“I love you,” she whispered.
“I love you too.”
“Okay, my turn.” Autumn grinned and swiped at her cheeks with the tissue. “Sammi, you are the reason I get up in the morning, even when you drive me to eat nothing but cupcakes. You’ve showed me the world, and then you gave me your heart. Thank you for letting me grow into the woman to love you. I promise to only run as far as the next room when I’m upset. I promise to keep food on our table. And I promise that I will love you, forever and always. Be mine?”
Autumn pulled Sammi’s ring from her pocket and slid it on his finger. He flexed his hand, breathing easier with all the pieces in place. “I’m always yours, Sunshine,” Sammi replied.
The officiator continued the ceremony. They’d chosen to keep it short for a number of reasons, but it felt even shorter compared to the rehearsal the night before. Before he knew it, the officiator told him to kiss his bride.
As if he wanted to do anything else.
Sammi swooped down, gathering Autumn into his arms and tipping her backward. Laughing, she wrapped her arms around his neck and planted a kiss on his mouth.
It was the beginning to a perfect future.
* * * * *
Autumn squeezed Sammi’s hand. His face
was screwed up into a grimace, and she couldn’t imagine her face looked any better. People watched or milled around, eating, dancing or socializing. The ceremony had moved naturally into what they’d wanted, one big party.
“Just a few more moments,” Pandora muttered, twisting Autumn’s finger around.
“Shit. You just tattooed there,” Autumn got out between clenched teeth.
“You’re being such a baby.” Kellie dipped her tattoo machine in the ink and bent over Sammi again.
“You’re supposed to be nice to me on my wedding day,” Autumn retorted.
The pain was minimal, feeling more like a severe sunburn than anything else, but there were so many nerves in the hand and almost no fat.
“And I’m done,” Pandora said. She set the machine down and wiped off Autumn’s hand.
Autumn lifted her hand, holding it out to the side so both she and Sammi could admire it.
A Star of David sat on her knuckle, and a stylized S and A were intertwined around her finger, with curling swirls completing the design. Autumn blew out a breath and grinned at Sammi.
She’d always said that wedding ring tattoos were a bad idea, and here she was, getting her own. Sometimes life made a liar out of you. It was a conscious decision. The tattoo represented not only their union as husband and wife, but her promises to think things through and stop running. Any time she wanted to throw in the towel, she’d look at her finger and see that tattoo and remember the promises she’d made.
“And that’s a wrap.” Kellie placed her machine on the small table Pandora and she had shared and cleaned up Sammi’s hand.
He placed his hand on her knee and she could have cried all over again. They belonged to each other now, in ink, heart and spirit.
“Put your hand on his knee so I can take a picture.” The photographer shooed Pandora and Kellie away and instructed them on just how to sit and pose. It wasn’t as organic and fun as their beach photo shoots, but this time it was the real deal.
“Okay, I seriously have to pee or I’m going to wet myself,” Autumn said at last.
“Here, I’ll help you.” Pandora laughed and assisted Autumn getting out of the folding chair with her puffy skirts and together they slipped inside the near silent house.
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