But Millie wasn’t so easily put off track. “Now, about Carrie. She grew up here, and after the non-wedding and running off, she lost her sense of worth and belonging. That’s why she came back home. You knew she lost her medical license?”
Tess shook her head. Another thing Susan hadn’t bothered to mention. “Susan didn’t tell me that like all the other stuff she didn’t tell me.”
“Tess, did you and Susan ever talk about Carrie or did you just tiptoe around it?”
Tess thought for a moment. Had they ever talked about Carrie or about her and Susan’s past relationship? Susan had made it evident that the topic of Carrie was off-limits. “No, I guess we didn’t. Not really. Not in depth. It seemed like sprinkling salt in Susan’s wounds, so we didn’t really talk about it.” She ran her hands through the garden soil, loosening it up.
“Susan doesn’t want Carrie, she wants you. Now, I’m not saying what she did was right. She should’ve told you, but what’s done is done at this point. Forgive her and move on, Tess.”
“Oh, Millie, I wish I could, but I don’t know. I feel foolish. I should’ve given her a chance to explain.”
“Phish. Just call her up and tell her you want to talk. It’s not that hard.” Millie got up. “I’ve got to pick up Bernie and then we’re off to yoga class. Oh, Bernie told me to tell you that Connie threw her out a time or two—it’s a rite of passage. And then you get to have raucous good sex.”
“Oh, Millie.”
“Call her.” Millie wagged her finger at Tess and then strode away.
Tess watched Millie start up her car and rumble down the street, setting off two car alarms as she passed by. Tess laughed, knowing that Millie got a kick out of doing that. She went back inside, poured a glass of lemonade, sat at the kitchen table, and stared at her phone. She weighed the pros and cons of calling Susan. Her heart made the final decision, and before her brain could talk herself out of it, she hit speed dial. The phone connected, rang seven times and with each ring, Tess’s blood pressure rose. Susan’s voice mail answered.
Tess sighed dramatically and hung up without leaving a message. Obviously, Susan didn’t want to talk to her. Oh well, so much for reaching out.
Tess walked away—from her phone, her old life, and Susan.
***
Steph and Susan stood in the driveway looking down at the remains of Susan’s phone. Rosa had evidently run it over as she backed out going to work. Nothing was left but a squashed pile of black plastic and glass.
“I must’ve dropped it when I got out of the car last night,” Susan said. She toed the mess.
“Good thing you already used my phone to call the florist,” Steph said.
“Yeah, good thing. Now what am I going to do, Mickey?”
Steph chuckled. “Well, Rocky, you’re going to get back in the ring and kick some butt.”
“And how do I do that?”
“Get a new phone,” Steph said with a simple shrug.
“I’m not going to have time to get a new phone before I go to work,” Susan said. A strange, icy feeling clutched at her throat and chest. Susan knew that cold feeling. It was fear. It was the fear of being without a phone. She was going to drive her car to work and work all day—without a phone. How did people used to do that? They would drive miles and miles; they would go places and do things—without a phone!
“I’ll take care of it,” Steph said.
“How?” Susan was on the verge of tears. What if Tess tried to call? She’d think Susan was avoiding her and that would be the kiss of death.
“I’ll go to the phone store and get you a new one. Frank knows me. He’ll do it without your being there. And the SIM card looks fine,” Steph said. She reached down and plucked the tiny card out of the broken shards. “No harm, no foul. You want the same kind of phone?”
“Sure,” Susan said. She wasn’t convinced this was going to work, but she wanted Tess desperately now. Last night was starting to seem like a nightmare and Susan wanted more than anything else to wake up and pretend the whole thing never happened.
“Off to work with you, then.” Steph opened Susan’s car door for her.
Susan climbed behind the wheel, but looked doubtful. “Are you sure…?”
“I’ve got this,” Steph said.
***
Parker called Tess from Mrs. March’s kitchen. She had just finished putting the countertops in and needed a break.
“How’s it going?” Parker asked.
“I called in sick. But I didn’t lie. I told my boss that I was heartsick,” Tess said. She was sitting on the porch swing, drinking lemonade.
“And?”
“I tried to call Susan, but she’s not answering. And before you ask, no, I didn’t leave a message.” Tess sipped her lemonade and tried not to sound morose.
“Shouldn’t you try again?”
“I am the injured party here. She should be the one calling.” Tess felt her ire rising. No way was she calling twice. She already felt stupid and weak for calling once. Susan should be the one making amends, not her.
“I’m not doing that. I’m trying to muster up your better self. You know Susan isn’t cheating on you and deep in your heart you know she loves you. What more is there to say?”
“Susan could start by calling and saying she’s sorry, for starters,” Tess said, getting miffed again.
“She will. Be patient. She’s probably processing what went on and figuring out what she should do. She’s very logical.”
“Don’t I know that,” Tess said.
“Okay, I get it. You’re mad, but just chill. All couples have issues.”
“Tell me one issue you and Amy have had and I’ll believe you.”
Parker said, “I didn’t tell her for a long time that I am not up to planning the wedding by myself.”
“And what did she do? Yell and scream, make you sleep on the couch?”
Parker was silent again.
“Parker?”
“She said she’d help me and that I shouldn’t worry.”
Tess sighed.
“Let go of your anger, Tess. It’s only getting in your way.”
“I know.”
***
Susan started her day at Brookside. She had stopped by the hospital and told them to reroute her calls to Brookside’s receptionist. She wondered if Tess had gotten the flowers yet. Of course, she wouldn’t know if Tess did call because she didn’t have her phone.
She went to see Josie, her favorite patient, who was delighted to see her. Susan sat in a chair by Josie’s bed.
“Let’s read that nice book,” Josie said, pointing to the stacks of notebooks on the top of her dresser.
“I think that’s a wonderful idea,” Susan said. She needed something to take her mind off things and reading to Josie never failed to make her feel better.
“Did I tell you about that one time that I thought Desmond had fallen out of love with me and was having an affair?” Josie asked.
“No,” Susan said, picking up the top notebook. The notebook was the last one Josie had written before she finally succumbed to the Alzheimer’s. Susan took care to rotate the notebooks so they would be read in chronological order.
“Well, it was silly of me really. I was an insecure bride, only nineteen, and Desmond went away to his brother’s wedding. I couldn’t go. I was on bed rest because I was pregnant and I’d already lost two babies, miscarriages, you know. The wedding was in Iowa, which seemed such a long way, but I knew he had to go. He was so fond of his brother. Well, my friend Essie Mae got a hold of a story about how Desmond was palling around with an old flame. Her aunt’s sister’s mother’s daughter, or some such nonsense, had called and told Essie Mae and she told me. By the time Desmond got home, I was fit to be tied. I screamed and yelled and hollered and carried on something fierce. Then the contractions started. Oh my goodness, what a mess that was! Everyone all up in arms and Essie Mae came to the hospital and confessed to Desmond what she’d done. He
about killed her. The woman he’d been palling around with was his cousin from Oklahoma.”
“Was everything okay?” Susan was afraid of the answer.
“Oh, yes. I gave birth to my one and only baby boy. He was small but he was the most beautiful thing I ever laid eyes on. Desmond was so happy.”
Susan had never seen Josie’s son which meant he was no longer a darling boy or something had happened.
“I named him Bobby. He comes to see me, regular.” Josie smiled. “Oh dear, maybe we could read another time. I’m ever so tired. Remembering taxes me so.”
“You rest.” Susan watched as the old woman closed her eyes. What were the chances that Josie would have such a lucid moment right when Susan needed it most? The universe works in mysterious ways, which is very hard for a pragmatic doctor to believe, but Susan was slowly becoming a convert.
Mrs. Branson poked her head in the doorway of Josie’s room. “There you are! Your friend dropped by with your new phone, dear.” She held out the new phone and Susan took it.
“Oh, thank goodness,” Susan said. It was weird, but she had felt so naked and vulnerable without her phone.
“Did you have a good visit?” Mrs. Branson asked, indicating Josie.
“She was very tired.” She walked toward the door, then stopped. “Mrs. Branson, does Josie’s son, Bobby, ever come to visit? I’ve never met him.”
“Oh, dear, no. He died in the Vietnam War. Such a sad thing and such a waste. Josie never got over it.” She looked down at Josie and shook her head sadly. “Sometimes losing a memory is a good thing.”
Yes, it was, Susan thought. She managed to wait until she got to her car to check for a message from Tess. There were none. Damn!
She phoned Steph, thanked her, and told her Tess hadn’t contacted her.
“I was afraid of that,” Steph said.
“What do you mean?” Susan asked. Had Steph heard something?
“If she had texted or called you wouldn’t know it,” Steph said. She grunted.
“What are you doing?” Susan asked.
“Helping move an enormous state-of-the-art fridge into the fire station. It talks to you and tells you what you’re low on, like milk or bread. It actually helps you make your shopping list. It’s fantastic. I’m going to save up for one of my own,” Steph said.
“Why are you helping? Shouldn’t the appliance guy be loading it?”
“The appliance guy twisted his ankle in the Red Shoe March. So did Sal and Eric. That leaves just me and Ruth trying to load it in.”
There was considerable more grunting and Ruth’s voice in the background. Susan waited.
“Okay, now what were we talking about?” Steph said back into the phone.
“Tess,” Susan said. A part of her wanted to leap through the phone and give Steph a good shake. “Why don’t her messages come through?”
“Oh, that. Frank at the phone store told me that you lose all your call history when you destroy the phone or something like that. I didn’t really get it. So if she had called or texted you wouldn’t know.”
“Oh, hell. What am I supposed to do now?” Susan muttered. She was on the verge of angry tears.
“Call her and ask to see her so you can apologize and beg and promise to never have anything more to do with your ex like you should’ve done in the first place.”
“I don’t need a lecture,” Susan said.
“Evidently you do. Now, go see her.”
“I can’t, we’re both working.”
“Ugh. I mean after that,” Steph said. She spoke to someone in the background. “Hold on, Ruth, I’ll be right there.” Back to Susan, she said, “I gotta go. Talk to you later.” She clicked off.
Susan knew Steph was right. She was going to have to face the music and force Tess to talk to her.
***
Rosa entered The Perk five minutes before they closed at noon. Carrie was running the cash register.
“What can I get you?” Carrie asked.
“An Americana with three shots,” Rosa said. “And a favor.”
“A favor?” Carrie’s smile shut down. “I’m not leaving town.”
“That is more than evident. I want to talk to you. Do you have a minute?”
Carrie moved over and started making the order. She didn’t look at Rosa. She made the coffee and handed it over. She looked at the clock on the wall, saying, “Let me put the closed sign up and we’ll talk.”
“Okay,” Rosa said. She took a table in the back and sipped her coffee. She wasn’t certain she was doing the right thing, but she had to try something. Steph had kept her posted. The flowers plan had not worked. Susan had them sent to Tess’s work. None of them had initially known that Tess had called in sick until much later. That explained the nonresponse on the floral delivery.
Carrie came over to the table and sat down. “So… talk.”
“You’re messing up Susan’s relationship with Tess,” Rosa said. She kept her voice even.
Carrie raised her eyebrows. “What did I do?”
“Come on, like you don’t know,” Rosa said, balling up her hands in her lap.
“Really, Rosa, I don’t. I only want good things for Susan. I wouldn’t do anything more to hurt her. I swear.”
“How can you say that? Tess kicked Susan out of the house when she found out.”
Carrie looked genuinely confused and then it dawned on her. “The loan?”
“Exactly,” Rosa said. She sipped her coffee wondering if Carrie were lying to her. She studied her. As a police officer, Rosa was good at reading people. She looked for a tell. There wasn’t one. She didn’t think Carrie was lying. “You really didn’t know?”
“I figured if Susan was all right with it then Tess was by proxy,” Carrie said. She folded her hands on the table.
“Susan didn’t tell Tess and when Tess found out, the shit hit the fan. Tess thinks you two still love each other and she’s being played.”
“Why would she think that?” Carrie unfolded her hands and rubbed them on her jeans.
“Uh, think about it, Carrie.”
Carrie appeared to do so. “Rosa, tell me what to do and I’ll do it. I want to make this right. I appreciated what Susan did and I’ll admit it felt good because it seemed like she trusted me again. I want to be a success. I know I can’t be a doctor anymore but I want to help people and that’s what I came up with—helping the elderly. I thought it was a good thing.”
“It is, but it came at a cost.”
“Believe me, it was not my intention.”
“So, I need you to make it right,” Rosa said.
“What can I do?”
“Go see Tess and tell her.”
“Seriously?” Carrie shook her head in evident disbelief.
“You have to. It has to come from you.”
“What would I say?”
“For starters, how about you’re not having an affair with Susan.” Rosa checked her watch. She only had eleven minutes left on her lunch hour. Eleven minutes to make Carrie see reason.
“I only want Susan to be happy,” Carrie said. Unshed tears pooled in her eyes. “And I know I’m not the one to do it.”
“Then tell Tess that. And bring her some of those biscotti. And she likes cappuccino with a hint of caramel syrup and nonfat milk.”
“I think it’s going to take more than that.”
“Just do it. It’ll be your way of making amends.”
Carrie let out a long, slow breath before saying, “Okay. I will as soon as I finish cleaning up.”
Rosa smiled at her. “I wish we could’ve stayed friends. I’ve missed you. You were part of our group and your absence hurt us all.”
“I know. It was the biggest mistake of my life and I’ll be paying for it forever.”
“For that I am truly sorry for you.”
“I’d rather have your respect than your pity, but I lost that a long time ago.”
Rosa merely nodded.
***
> Tess was wheeling another bag of potting soil to the front yard when Carrie pulled up in the borrowed Mercedes. They stared at each other through the car windshield. Tess glanced at the shovel leaning up against the porch railing. For one terrible moment she envisioned luring Carrie into the backyard, whacking her on the head, and burying her in the flower garden.
Tess took a deep breath as Carrie got out of the car. She’d try to be reasonable. And by reasonable, she meant that she would only use the shovel as a last resort.
“Hey there,” Carrie said, sticking her hands in her back pockets and rocking nervously on the balls of her feet.
“You’ve got a lot of nerve coming here,” Tess said.
“I know.” Carrie reached into the car and pulled out a bag and two coffees in a tray. “I brought a peace offering.”
“Seriously? You actually think we’re going to sit down over coffee and have a chat, when I’d like to murder you with my bare hands?” So much for being reasonable.
“I’m sure I deserve all your anger, but please, Tess, we need to talk.”
“What, so you can tell me that you and Susan are going to live happily ever after and you’re sorry? No thanks. It’s over anyhow. You win. You get the girl.”
“Tess, it’s not like that. I screwed up so bad that she’d never take me back, and I don’t want that anyway. I know now that I had to leave off Susan because it hurts the both of us too much. She needs you. You’re good for her.”
“And I’m supposed to believe my girlfriend’s mistress when she tells me that nothing is going on? What do you take me for, a fool?”
“No, I take you for the luckiest woman in the world.”
“Get out of here.” Tess turned and walked up the steps onto the porch.
“You have to believe me,” Carrie called to her back.
Tess stopped and turned back to face Carrie. “Yeah, I’m supposed to believe an ex-addict with commitment issues.” Tess hoped that hit home—hard.
Carrie deflated. Her bottom lip trembled. “Listen… I know I’m a bad person. I’ve always been a bad person.” She placed the coffees and bag on the roof of the car. “I don’t deserve anyone.” She crumpled against the side of the car and buried her face in her hands.
Change of Heart (The True Heart Series Book 3) Page 20